Your arm is draped around me.
Your soft snores. Your head is on my shoulder.
You are starting to sweat because you sweat in your sleep.
All you have on is a t shirt and socks.
No boxers.
Its 8:35 am and my world has never been as perfect as this. Sunlight creeps through my window.
You're 6'4 and roughly 215 lbs,
But all I see is a sweet little boy.
Your gauges are 5/8" and black.
You wear vans, black craft cult, and zumiez only.
You have thick brows over green eyes.
Dark hair.

I love your hands, long slender fingers that seem to be twice my size.

I love your legs, long ropey and strong. And hairy.

I love your lips and the way they pucker out when you're asleep and I love ever single one of your teeth.

I love your morning breath and the way you wake up.

I love your choppy, ragged breaths when you're inside me.

I love your nervousness, even though I hate it.

I love you.

Sneaky obsessed *******-
If you don't like what I write
Get the ******* of it!
I only told you about this place
Cause I trusted you,
Cause I thought I loved you.

Don't you turn the words Im feeling
Into some kinda crime.
Don't get offended- its not meant for your eyes.

Its meant for mine.

You are worth it to me.
I'd trade all the stars
And the sun for you,
I'll walk in the moons
Pale light to see your pale face.

I'd trade every cigarette
I've ever smoked or I'll ever smoke,
I'll breathe in your
Intoxicating scent instead.

I'd trade all my first kisses,
All my hugs and first loves.
I'll pour my young love
And my old love into your pores.

I'd trade every laugh I've ever heard,
Every delighted giggle
Just to hear you laugh
Every time I'm nearby.

I'd die for you, yes and,
I'd live for you and die with you.

You're such a different breed,
Than any man I thought I could need.

Oh baby,
        You're the one for me.

I look into your eyes-
I feel it.
I feel it when we kiss.
When you hold me.
When you touch me.
I feel it when you laugh
I feel it watching you **** down
Cigarettes like you're looking for
Lung cancer.
So I'll kiss you back
And hold your hand
And caress your face softly.
I'll make you laugh just to hear it-
I'll kiss the smoke off your lips
And exhale it into the night air.

Because I love you.
I love you.

I haven't been able to say it,
It gets caught in my throat.
It scratched my tongue till
I cough it out when you're not around.

Kiss me till my lips are swollen.
Hold my hand just a little too tight.
When you grab my hair, yank it
And when you kiss my neck, bite it.

I don't know how to love
Without pain anymore.

I feel my brain has disconnected from my body.
Every scentence I say, I regret. I am my
Worst
Critic.

I'm watching my life through
A window, my fingers balled up
Against the glass as I watch
Minuted hours and days pass.

I wish I could slip back into my
Body, but my hands feel like
I'm wearing gloves all the time.

Is this depression?

I sleep for 13 hours straight
Then don't sleep for almost 24.
My body is lost without my mind.

Is this depression?

I **** down cigarettes
Every **** day.
I hardly eat.
I can't remember my last meal.

Is this depression?

I cut myself to see if I could feel it.
I cannot feel it.
But its summer, and its ugly.
I don't like the way it heals.
I just like the way it bleeds.

Is this depression?