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 Sep 2013 lily staples
st64
Too big
 Sep 2013 lily staples
st64
eyeball too big
or
dream too big?


That **** alice-door is too tiny
Just enough to peep through
One mere eyeball
And espy the jolly life of dreams
Yet barely enough for a hand to reach through
let alone fingertips to taste …

Cruelty is…midday heart-brake too big
Reality makes sure to stick it in *deep

Its harsh voice stoking…stoking
Gleeful gives the dreamer an artful kick



maybe moment has dawned
to reduce that ambitious dream-reel
perhaps too big…on the teasing life-wheel
oh, drat! no biggie…
may well just trash every heart’s desire
let go of hope and let drown




no…forget it, Fate
I shan’t, no.
come…..
come onnnnnnnnnnnn, then….!
hey, come and drag me by my ****** heels
with my face in the gutter!



(I am WAITING...)


S T, 15 August 2013
Life’s seems to be a test, at best...every way we look at it.
Trying…
And trying, too…!

(must find that ****** key…and flippin’ magic potion, if it even exists… lol)

not going down....despite consistent taunting of adversity... et al.
The brightest of stars will die
the most sonorous singing voice will be still,
that day too an indiscreet cuckoo, will sing oblivious,
from its perch and people will listen without fail,
while the coffin slowly moves to the pyre, bit far.
We are pall bearers for those who walked before us,
by and by the sun will go down and shadows will fall on us.
Loveliest of flowers would lose fragrance, turn to dust
There isn't any new road that leads to one's goals,
"war that end all wars" don't believe it, what a hoax!
Keep patience, delve deep in to self, liberate oneself,
see consistence only in change; it never stops.
I miss...
missing you
chasing you
wishing for you
to wish for me.

I miss...
excitedly telling you
who I am
and who I wish to be.

I miss...
not knowing
when I would see you
hold you
exhale your breath.

I love us now...
don't misunderstand...
but the anticipation
and the adventure
at times get over-powered
by the day.

I miss...
our breathless
creativity
and the almost violent need
to be close.
I look into your eyes, and I see nothing.
This will be the last time I see you.
You’re going to take your own life next week.
Your parents divorced through no fault of your own.
But, you blame yourself.
If I knew, I would stop and talk to you.
I would love you and help you.
But I can’t see, so I don’t.

I look into your eyes and I see nothing.
If I knew, I would be mortified.
You’re going to **** your girlfriend after your date tomorrow.
You’ll regret your decision for the rest of your life.
It will ruin you; it will ruin her.
If I knew, I’d stop you.
I would do something; I would keep you from ruining your life.
But I can’t see, so I don’t.

I look into your eyes, and I see nothing.
There will be accident: a bad one.
You will lose who you love most.
If I knew, I would be your friend.
I would comfort you, so you wouldn’t have to go through this alone.
There is a light at the end of the tunnel.
And I could help you share this burden.
But I can’t see, so I don’t.

I look into your eyes, and I see nothing.
Your heart so depressed and your joy gone.
Nobody wants you; nobody accepts you.
Soon, you’ll fall into drink and drugs to fill the void.
You tried to talk to me once, but I didn’t listen; you tried to reach out, but I didn’t hear.
Too busy was I, that I pretended not to notice.
If I knew, I would stop, listen, and love you.
But I can’t see, so I don’t.

I look into your eyes, and I see nothing.
A decision you’ll make to start selling yourself.
You’ve never loved yourself after your father did what he did.
And every man since has treated you the same.
In no way is this your fault, but you don’t understand; you blame yourself.
If I knew, I would show you that there are good men.
I would show you that your worth lies in your heart.
But I can’t see, so I don’t.

I look into your eyes, and I see nothing.
Picked on and beat up almost every day, you can’t handle it anymore.
You’ll show them; you’ll show the world who you are.
When they beg for mercy, you’ll have your revenge.
In that moment they’ll be sorry, but you’ll show them no mercy.
If I knew, I would calm you. I would keep you from becoming a monster.
All you ever wanted was a best friend, and that’s what I would be.
But I can’t see, so I don’t.

I look into your eyes, and I see nothing.
Joyous your life has been, until now, but soon, your world will be turned upside down.
You’ll look at yourself and wonder what you did wrong.
You’ll question your beauty, your love, and your personality.
What made him leave for her? You’ll never know; you’ll just question.
If I knew, I’d tell you that it was his fault not yours.
I’d tell you that you’re most precious, and that he didn’t deserve you.
But I can’t see, so I don’t.

I look into your eyes, and I see nothing.
There are so many faces: countless of which going through such pain.
I know I can’t help all of them; there are too many for one person to heal.
But I could help some, so shouldn’t I try?
The lives I could touch would be forever changed, if only I would reach out.
The help and love I could bring, though not much, could change a destiny.
My life could be worth something if I only I knew!
But I can’t see, so I don’t.

— The End —