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Lily Jan 9
I see you in the rain as it falls
willingly, bursting against the pavement.

I see you in the trees:
knocked about by careless winds,
browning under sunlight,
shivering in the winter.

I see you in milky, uncoloured tea
sloshing coldly, splattering everywhere.

The more I leave it alone, the less appetising it becomes.
[Written in 2013]
Lily Jan 9
Smoke fills our back garden

as the sun blinds the leaves and lilies

in our garden of Eden.
Why did everything become bitter

when you sank your greedy teeth into 

women at 3 am?

Stained bedsheets and shattered memories,

I am removed to potholes and the smoke

I force myself to breathe in.

Just a footstep whispering above me

as I lay constricted under deep and muggy soil

waiting for you to dig me up -
out of jealousy and spite.
Maybe if I cross my fingers hard enough,
it will be more than my heart that dies.
[Written in 2013]
Lily Jan 2
In all of the twinkling and shining
that the city had to offer me,
the only sparkling I could see was in the eyes next to me.

As we sat in the silence
and felt the air become dense with tension and condensation,
empty words and teeth clenches became frequent
as the innocent giggles and handholding wrapped themselves up
and rolled down the hills into the very lights that had become
blurred in your vision.

Although I could control my tear ducts -
pluck back my vocal chords -
I could not prevent the inevitable suffering
of the silence that choked us to a sensible conclusion:
you smothered me with attention and devotion
as I strangled your heart with my own bare hands.
[Written in 2013]
Lily Jan 2
People think they can cure you with words.
But in reality, they can only scar you.
For a compliment is washed away
with tears of disappointment
when offences are stamped
with stains of judgement.
[Written in 2011]

— The End —