You think I don't believe in the compliments you spin
When it's opening your words
And finding nothing but dust
That causes me to
f a l t e r

*-lf-

Small wrist
Tight fist
You won’t miss this
My punches,
They aren’t aimed for you
They’re for the walls
The walls that I built
I’ll tear them down on my own
I don’t need you
I don’t need you
I never needed you
Adrenaline,
It makes me feel alive
I feel it in my veins
It takes the place
Of the bitter pain
It’s better than pain
Anything’s better than pain
My heart,
It’ll make it on its own
It’s lived many lives
It has grown, and grown
And now it’s old
Fragile
But my body is not fragile
I am not fragile
I refuse to be fragile
Let me feel
Help me feel
Prevent me
Stop me
From hating
What I used to love
What I used to crave
Has brought me to my knees
And I scream, battered,
As I bleed
Pull me from the wreckage
Where are you
Where are you
You
You’re within me
You’re what I bleed
You’re what I see
You’re what I need
You’re my disease
And I’m just a fiend
You can’t fix me
I’m a fiend
Disgusting disease.
Hopeless.

*-lf-

Don’t fall for a poet.
She will build up walls.
She will do anything to stop you
From crawling into her heart
And making a nest,
Making yourself at home.
She will barricade her mind.
You will only be able to read the trickles
That she so wisely chooses.
Don’t fall for a poet because
If she does decide to let you in
She’ll be careful to lock the doors
And sleep with a knife under her pillow
Every night she will wake up in cold sweat
And scribble down words that voice her regrets
Don’t fall for a poet
Because when you wreck the home
You made in her heart
And leave without a word
She will build up walls of iron this time
Don’t fall for a poet
Because her words will haunt you
Don’t fall for a poet
Unless you want to be her muse
Want to feel what it’s like
To be eloquently,
Verbally
Abused

*-lf-

My bones are weak, my heart is numb
My mind has caged me, I’m coming undone
I’m spiraling into darkness, once again
I’m losing myself, I can already see the end
There’s a dark tunnel, and the light seems to be behind me
All I’m praying for, is for another lost soul to find me
For a heart to hold me, for a hand to guide me
My bones are weak, they break on your command
I can’t seem to determine, whether I want to die on my knees
Or get shot while I stand
Please rip out my heart, cut open my mind
Try to read the fickle thoughts that have been left behind
The barrel is at my throat, I feel the metal against my chin
I thought it was over, but again it shall begin
I’m destined to be insane, to be alone, to die in vain
I don’t need you, I don’t want you
Leave me alone
Leave me
And my bones

*-lf-

How can I let my lifeline be something
so inconsistent?
How can I let my food be a plant that’s
growing season is whenever the sun is out,
in a land where there are clouds more often than not?
I don’t have the lung capacity to hold my breath
when you’re not around.
Cigarette packages are marked with caution signs by law -
I don’t see why relationships don’t come with the same label.
Love me when it conveniences you.
Maybe you won’t love me at all.

*-lf-

I’m intoxicated by your scent
I smell you on my skin
Every time I take a breathe
I inhale the aroma of your sin
I feel your fingers on my body
Your lips brushing my neck
I feel remnants of what we were
Dripping in my cold sweat
I’m drowning in this ocean
Tied down by the tension
I’m screaming for change
Just a little attention
I hear my name slip off your tongue
I see the honesty in your eyes
God you make me feel so young
This is what it must be like
To be alive

*-lf-