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34.1k · May 2014
Leelan Farhan May 2014
She swings upon her crooked pendulum,
her eyes burning with a scarlet fire.
Her white dress cannot mask what I know to be
her deepest and darkest desire.

3.8k · Jun 2013
Leelan Farhan Jun 2013
I love the winter
-- oh how I love the cold.
The numbing temperature is morphine to my soul.
Rushing through my veins, turning my blood to ice
A natural drug; my only sense of sanity, my demonic vice
And it frees me.

I love the winter,
and all its melodramatic glamour.
There's a sheen of romantic sadness when church bells clammor
I love the winter;
-- it's when I came out of the Cave.
Saw the Truth for what it was,
and wrote it down page by page.

Leave me with the snow;
I want to hear the church bells
© Leelan Farhan 2012.
2.0k · Oct 2013
You're Not a Handyman
Leelan Farhan Oct 2013
Open up to me, he says
But inside there is nothing but void
Feel a little, he says
Little does he know
Every word that spills from his mouth
Injects itself into my blood
The anesthetic that numbs my soul
Listen to me, he yells
But all I hear is noise.

They want to fix me
Want to hammer out the perfect girl
To fit into their crumbling little world
-- a doll to beautify their cemetery
their collection of hollowed out bodies.
I may be empty but I’ve already been a token
Too many times.

Let me fix you, they say.
But all they do is break me.
Take more from me.
Let me fix you, they say.
Never once did they ask to heal me.
Try to glue me back together.
I’m already open.
But I was broken into.
I’m already open
But you don’t like what you see
I guess it’s not pretty to watch me bleed.
I’m already open.
But you don’t like what you’ve found.
******* away the pain won’t do no good,
So put me back down.
Inject me with your silent poison and



© Leelan Farhan
   Oct 29 2013
1.9k · Sep 2013
Leelan Farhan Sep 2013
I can feel her creeping back into my blood stream
The anger, she's unravelling again
The veins in my arm are pumping flames I thought I'd put out for good
But you, you've ignited them
Flicked your selfish lighter
I'm on fire
My chest constricting with your apathy
Suffocating me
And slowly
I shrink
Revert back into that girl
Who could not control her affect
Running on a constant adrenaline high
Dear god I'm on fire and I'm praying for someone to put me out

Leelan Farhan
Sept 2 2013
1.9k · Aug 2013
Death Wish
Leelan Farhan Aug 2013
You're the cracks in my skin
the blood that I bleed.
You're the carbon dioxide
that I unleash
to stop you
from suffocating me.

You're the pounding in my skull,
the cartilage damage in my knees
slowly ripping life from me,
with no mercy
despite my pleas.

You're Satan's kiss
-- you're a personal death wish.
You are agony
But you're agony that I miss.
                 For when a blind man regains sight,
                                  it's nothing short of bittersweet
                 -- a painless torture technique.

© Leelan Farhan
    August 11 2013
1.6k · Jun 2013
punch buggy no punch backs
Leelan Farhan Jun 2013
My aunt had a yellow Volkswagen Beetle
As bright as her hair, as fierce as her mind
With a sharp tongue, she left every man behind
She thought she could change him
My aunt is the one bearing the scars.
© Leelan Farhan
    May 2013
1.5k · Jun 2013
Leelan Farhan Jun 2013
I thought it would get easier as time passes
but every time your name leaves my mouth
I feel all the oxygen in my body leave with it
depleting my energy
ripping my throat to shreds as it makes its way

Your name --
It used to sound delicious on my lips
leaving me breathless
Now it's a different kind of breathless.
The kind that suffocates me
and laughs as I begin to choke.

I used to think it brilliant that you saw colours
when you heard my voice.
Now I wonder if the only colour you'd see is
that of darkness and hatred

© Leelan Farhan
    June 7 2013
1.5k · Jun 2013
Leelan Farhan Jun 2013
This is a ghost town,
filled with ex-lovers
and former friends.

Drowning in denial
Never to see one another

This is a lost town,
where young hearts wander,
desperately clinging to their past.

We push and we pull
Pull and we push
But moments never last.

A forbidden town --
the town of my heart.
The town that closed its gates on you
As soon as we fell apart.

© Leelan Farhan
    June 8 2013
1.4k · Jun 2013
Leelan Farhan Jun 2013
In my psychology class this year I read that
lab rats walked over broken glass
starved themselves to near death
and chose to be tortured
if it meant they could receive electric shocks.
And despite my damaged heart
I still yearn for your electricity.

© Leelan Farhan
    June 2013
1.3k · Jun 2013
The Phoenix of Babylon
Leelan Farhan Jun 2013
"*****, filthy, subhuman creatures"
They don’t care if you’re doctors,
lawyers or teachers
They’ll kidnap your children,
spit on your soul
Terrorize your family,
kick in your door

They’ll drug your mind with propaganda
Cut out your tongue if you try to stand up
They’ll beat you till you bleed
But we never plead for mercy,
No we never claim defeat

They’ll kick you under the desk,
send you slamming into the wall
They’ll laugh and kick you harder,
if you try to get up, if you try to crawl

But our crawling brings us to our knees,
Slowly, we rise up to our feet
And we’ll face the persecution
The vile, mind-prostitution

They **** our women and our children,
Just as much as they **** our minds
****** our emotion,
But they will not ****** our pride
Our dignity is our iron,
Our religion is our crime.
But you cannot destroy us
Believe me, many have tried.

There is silver in our blood,
Gold in our soul
Oil paint coats our skin
And our words swallow you whole

Our hearts are poets,
Constructing your fears
Our thoughts are daggers and arrows
Our minds are cunning engineers

You can hang us from the ceiling
You can throw us in a tank of gas
But our lungs are as pure as snow
And this pain will never last

We have risen from the ashes
Hear our battle cries
We do not yield weapons
In silence,
we ride
This is a very personal poem, about the human rights violations occurring in my parents' homeland (Iraq).
© Leelan Farhan 2013
1.2k · Aug 2014
Leelan Farhan Aug 2014
I am as empty as they come
a ship with holes in its floorboards;
life seeps in and out of me, a constant balance of nothingness.
I'm aware of the input, but it slides out from underneath me
before I have a chance to bid it a proper goodbye.

I am as empty as they come
a disillusioned body suffering from disorders of the mind;
a carcass of medication packaged neatly with skin and vacant eyes.

I am as empty as they come:
An abandoned ship,
An abandoned mind,
the disillusioned eyes of the blind.

I am as empty as they come.
But I too,
was once filled to the brim
with heart-pounding vigor.
© Leelan Farhan
   August 4 2014
1.2k · Aug 2013
The Wolf & His Prey
Leelan Farhan Aug 2013
Your tongue licks the sweat off me
-- tasting what you wrongfully claimed as
No mercy - you take no prisoners,
only lost souls.

You're a vulture, a crow
And god, don't you know?
the pain you cause me
when you lick the blood
off my bones?

Your claws dig into my marrow
   - are you finished yet?
My decaying brain is left with
holes of regret.
Send me to purgatory
- I'm finished with this mess.

A naive deer is still full of grace
You may have mauled my soul,
but there's still a bit you have yet to taste.
I'll run circles around your head,
throwing fairy dust into your soul.

This silent deer is screaming for mercy,
but you haven't yet swallowed her whole.

© Leelan Farhan
    August 25 2013
1.2k · Oct 2013
Leelan Farhan Oct 2013
Eyes stained black, circled with lack of sleep
all in pursuit of a single letter
When all I've ever wanted in my life was to grow out of my skin
And embed myself into soil and greenery
Push myself beyond possibility
Beyond mere existence
Beyond the confinement of blood, bone and flesh
Towards life itself
Beyond matter and atoms
Towards the intangible
Through words and rhythm
Against the floor
Against my mind
Tapping every confinement hoping one day the walls would collapse
And on days like today
Where my lipstick cannot hold my smile
And my mascara betrays my soul
I feel suffocated by the hands of metal
Tall silver scrutinizing me from above
But I will never cease to push against matter
I'd rather die with my arms broken from effort
Than shrivel up in a body lacking oxygen
I look up at the loving green arms and ask for mercy
For freedom from this artificial purgatory

Leelan Farhan
Oct 16 2013
1.1k · Jun 2013
Leelan Farhan Jun 2013
day 1
I feel a weight lifting off of my shoulders
I feel clean
I feel alive
I can finally breathe
without you in my life.
No more suffocation
No more mind games
and required resuscitation

day 3
I'm crawling out of bed
and you're trickling
through my ears
and into my head
once again.
The lack of poison in my veins
is making me itch.
I need to hear your voice,
need to feel your touch.
Too much.
I need you too much

day 5*
I'm breathing but I cannot
feel anything.

cycle on/cycle off*
until I tell you everything
this dependency will have to be enough

Haven't written in a while because life's been good and I haven't been thinking of you. But today is a Day 3.
© Leelan Farhan June 19 2013
1.0k · Jun 2013
life support
Leelan Farhan Jun 2013
I want to learn to live again.
Someone teach me how to breathe again.
Inhale, exhale, slow.
No more, no more.
I am not strong.
I cannot hold on.
Much longer.
I want to learn to to feel again.
Someone teach my blood to flow.
Hollow eyes, easy demise.
Going down, going down.
Take my kingdom, take my crown.
Take my head, spin it round.
Smile, smile, they’re looking at you
They’re watching your eyes
They’re watching your moves.
Don’t flinch, don’t break
How much can you take?
You fake, you fake.
My life is nothing
Withering flower
In a fragile state
© Leelan Farhan
    December 2012
991 · Jun 2013
Leelan Farhan Jun 2013
The anger rushes through my blood like *******,
After all this pain,
Hearing your voice will never be the same.
It courses through me, calm and collected
I try to be, I try to be.
Breathing air like I will never be given oxygen again
And you smile, but I reciprocate with one of pain.
My heart hardens into a stone,
Putting the final brick on this wall that I have built
This wall that blocks emotion; the soul you killed.
The anguish that has tormented me for so long has surfaced,
All neatly packaged into this situation I cannot escape.
And try as I might I can't erase the image of your face.
That smirk that shapes your lips, painted by Deceit
As I stare back my eyes reflect the fury lying beneath
The rage, that has been held back for far too long,
Eager to burst through my veins,
Like a dove waiting to break out into song.
Thoughts of retaliation burn holes in my mind,
Leaving all thoughts of understanding behind
Lies, they dribble through your lips like fine wine.
Blood red and ever so bitter with your insecurities.
The insecurities that are being heaved onto my back
You ****** them against me, trying to make up for what you lack.
But I’m fading; I’m a passing fog that once carried the Sun
And when you finally notice its beauty, I will be long gone.
Written sometime in 2012 in the middle of my philosophy class out of pure anger. I still remember the moment quite well.

© Leelan Farhan 2012
972 · Feb 2015
Leelan Farhan Feb 2015
We have buried the (((center))) of our being in layers of rigid hypotheticals,
pouring the cement of impossibility and refusing to drill deeper for
fear of an oil spill, an explosion, the expulsion of a dormant soul.

[If we]
[[If you]]
[[[If I]]]

The taste of a silent stroke on my tongue,
iron from the blood of unhealed wounds.
Metallic memories refusing to be forgotten
fighting to be remembered.

[You fools]
[[You fool]]
[[[I am a fool]]]

The scent of a carcass creeps into my nose,
rotten flesh from a casket broken up.
Frankenstein fears refusing to be mocked,
fighting for resurrection.

Even the bones of ancient species remerge as fossils to be found.

©Leelan Farhan
February 13, 2015
956 · Jul 2013
Leelan Farhan Jul 2013
The rain is coming down like an ocean unravelling,
just like my heart once did for you
-- a tsunami,
a whirlwind of emotion.

Come drown me again,
Come wash me with your voice.

There's a flood
and I think
I think
I may have been in love.

There's a flood
There's a flood
in my mind.

Your words
my thoughts.

There's a flood
and suddenly,

everything is you.
nothing like a little rain for inspiration.
© Leelan Farhan
    July 29 2013
955 · Jun 2013
verbal abuse
Leelan Farhan Jun 2013
Don’t fall for a poet.
She will build up walls.
She will do anything to stop you
From crawling into her heart
And making a nest,
Making yourself at home.
She will barricade her mind.
You will only be able to read the trickles
That she so wisely chooses.
Don’t fall for a poet because
If she does decide to let you in
She’ll be careful to lock the doors
And sleep with a knife under her pillow
Every night she will wake up in cold sweat
And scribble down words that voice her regrets
Don’t fall for a poet
Because when you wreck the home
You made in her heart
And leave without a word
She will build up walls of iron this time
Don’t fall for a poet
Because her words will haunt you
Don’t fall for a poet
Unless you want to be her muse
Want to feel what it’s like
To be eloquently,

954 · Jan 2014
mirror of erised
Leelan Farhan Jan 2014
Fantasy swirls --
taking over my mind.
I see desire caressing my small silhouette,
except I’m no longer so
s m a l l
I’m larger than life --
larger than the hands of the men
that push me into the earth.

The dreams of my desire grow like moss
all over the stinging thorns of reality.
Circuitry constructs happier versions
of the sad souls that I know --  
the dullness that fills my day with black and white
At night,
my mind comes alive with technicolor brilliance.
But I’m afraid I’m aging in front of desire--
laying myself naked, body wrinkled and deteriorating
in front of dreams that cannot be sparked.
And no matter how hard I try
to ignite reality,
my fantasies have used up all my oxygen, and factuality
has choked itself to death.

© Leelan Farhan
   January 31, 2014
934 · Jun 2013
Leelan Farhan Jun 2013
broken church
sins drowning veins
breathe like silence won’t pull you down
torn dignity spinning you away

                        your body isn’t love

children inhale battered minds
like it’s an inhaler
but it won’t save them
it won’t pull these waves
from my flesh
and stop my little lips
from smiling at death

I dream of your sweat
when we’re entangled

but your thoughts are vile
and my bones don’t need you
broken churches

A little something I threw together using my "words" page; thought I'd put it to use.
© Leelan Farhan
    June 5 2013
917 · Jun 2013
self worth
Leelan Farhan Jun 2013
I am your nightmare, I am your fear.
I am vile, I am a bat screeching in your ear.
I am torture, with a capital T
I am a noose that you cannot see.
I am the part of your soul that is black.
I am the treacherous thoughts you can't hold back.
I am the devil's spawn, the seven deadly sins
I am the sociopath acting out on a whim
I am a corpse on All Hallows Eve
I am the homeless, begging on my knees
I am the **** of the Earth, the dust of the wealth
I am an alcoholic in withdrawal, a person dying of bad health
I am a tumour, gnawing away at your life
I am a scar, being torn open by a knife
I am the bad,
the evil,
the vile
I am your paranoia, your reoccurring denial
You created this monster, this omen of death
And I will remind you until you take your last breath.

898 · Feb 2014
Leelan Farhan Feb 2014
Vulnerability is crying in public on the bus ride home,
trying desperately to avoid the wandering eyes
only to end up sitting beside a fellow apartment tenant.
Vulnerability is crying hard in front of a (stranger),
only to see them again.
-- that uncontrollable nakedness
Vulnerability is getting your rose-tinted glasses forcefully ripped off your face, exposed,
for what we truly are:
-- human

© Leelan Farhan
   (date unknown, found on a sheet of paper in the bottom of my bag...)
897 · Jun 2013
flirtation (10w)
Leelan Farhan Jun 2013
Your words are hollow
But your eyes fill the void.
- first time trying a 10 worder, not that great.
© Leelan Farhan
873 · Jul 2013
Leelan Farhan Jul 2013
Sometimes I hunger for pain -
it's better than feeling
          e m p t y.
Floating away while desperately
trying to cling onto what's left.

Air slips through my fingers
and it smells of you
-- the musk of your past,
because I'm not ready to
leave you behind.

Yet you're soaring away
-- wings beating steadily.
And soon you'll be a
speck in the sky.

I'm forever grounded
-- you planted me,
never bothered to water me
and left me here to wither
© Leelan Farhan
    July 2 2013
Leelan Farhan Jun 2013
This isn’t a poem about the way your fingers intertwine with mine
Because they’ve never been entangled with another set of hands.
This isn’t a line of prose about your soft lips on my calloused, tired skin
Because only the wind has caressed my body
This isn’t a work of art confessing little sweet nothings that you whisper in my ear
Because the sound of my pen on paper are the only whispers that I hear
This isn’t an elegant post-modern work about the way you wipe away my tears
Because my tears blend into my cheeks, become a part of who I am, moulded into my soul
This isn’t a ******* poem about you,
Because there’s only ever been
© Leelan Farhan
    January 2013
792 · Jun 2013
skin and bone
Leelan Farhan Jun 2013
I want to scream until I reach absolute silence
I want to ruin everything with such violence
I want to cut these locks
I want to shed this skin
I want to bleed cold blood,
want to breathe destruction in.

I want my cynicism to rot
I want to be granted rebirth.
I want to see the sun, for once
I want to see my worth.

I want to feel alive
Want to feel reality.

I'm ready to be human
I've accepted mortality.

© Leelan Farhan
    July 19 2012
773 · Jan 2014
chocolate brown
Leelan Farhan Jan 2014
They like the curve of my hips,
But not the melody of my voice
God why doesn't she ever shut up.

Love the glow of my face
But not the aura of my mind
She's so **** intimidating.

They like the lines of my lips,
But not my sharpness of tongue.
Does she think she's being funny?

Love the scent of my perfume
But not the courage behind honesty.
One of these days.
One of these **** days.
She's bound to shut up.

They like the curves
They love the lines
Admire every inch of my body.
But they never, ever
Pay attention to my eyes.

(C) Leelan Farhan
       January 27, 2014
763 · Jul 2014
Leelan Farhan Jul 2014
He opened doors to both Heaven and hell
but contradicting conflict is preferable to the purgatory of false confidence.

I numbed my soul with constructions and sudden reality is jarring.
Nobody likes being cut cold turkey
but the way he wipes my tears and touches his lips to mine makes the withdrawal infinitely better than intoxicating fantasies of escape.

(C) Leelan Farhan
       July 5 2014
759 · Sep 2013
youth's carcass
Leelan Farhan Sep 2013
They seep into my empty spaces
Blonde hair
Blue eyes
Wrong soul
Right time.
Filling in the gaps.
They leech onto my soul but
what is left for them to feed on?
Carcass and dead bones.
Crows, crows,
That is all I know.

Floating in limbo, they float in
And out.
Into my mouth,
Hands in my hair
Do I let them, do I dare?

They fill the wine glass of my body and mind
with nothing but water.
Only to drink it all and leave me dehydrated
-- fend for yourself, you con, you sham.
You put on, and you put on well.
So be ******* ****** if you please,
Be ****** to hell.
Drink out of the well of misery that you filled.
He emptied your soul and so you went looking
for a replacement.
But these placeholders do nothing but accumulate dust,
Leaving neat little circles when they decide to hit the bin.
And you’re left worse than you began,
-- nothing but a body of sin.
© Leelan Farhan
    September 7 2013
759 · Jul 2013
honest lies
Leelan Farhan Jul 2013
And he said:
you are beautiful;
darling, don't be sad."

And even though
he didn't last,
he gave me back
the life
I never had.

I clicked "Write Poem" with the intention of posting something I'd written earlier today, instead, this came out of nowhere.
© Leelan Farhan
    July 15 2013
751 · Jul 2013
Leelan Farhan Jul 2013
I'm everything you don't understand
a little beauty on demand.
Peel back my damaged skin,
let yourself drown in my blood
-- in my body.
Revel in my flesh,
because you will never touch my thoughts

Even these words that I spin
-- you can only lick them,
taste them,
but never hold them.
Never truly grasp my intentions
-- I keep those in a bottle by my bed
Don't even try to untangle the mess
inside my head.

I'm a catastrophic volcano,
going off from time to time.
Lying dormant, but when I explode
there will be nowhere to hide.

There are demons in my mind
-- demons you will never be able
to find.

Touch me all you want
-- drink in my flesh and bone.
You can take my body,
for it's my thoughts
you will never

© Leelan Farhan
    June 23 2013
718 · Dec 2013
toxic thoughts
Leelan Farhan Dec 2013
Ribs rattling against lungs like skeleton hands
attempting to stop angry ghouls from leaving their
deep & dark place.
But it's no use.
When darkness wants out, darkness will push and
push and push until it's convinced you to let it see the
light of day.
Manipulative, darkness is.
Tries to bargain with you:
"Just a peak - Just a taste and I promise I'll let the
daylight have you."
But it's a graduate from the school of greed and knows
how to pull your ribs open just a little
Just enough for it to crawl up to your throat and
never let go
Not until everything around you is the
mere absence of light

695 · Jul 2013
Leelan Farhan Jul 2013
Maybe we need to see each other bleed again
In order to regain the awe we once held for one another.
I think we need a reminder.

You've embraced me after seeing my tears
And yet now you have no problem igniting them
Releasing them from the side of me you once feared
Have you forgotten the darkness I kept hidden?
This is your reminder.

In case you missed the anger I tried not to unleash,
I'll let it out from its cage to give you a small kiss.
This is your reminder.

The first time I met you I was filled with nothing but hate,
I don't know how I came to love you.
Maybe I need a reminder.

© Leelan Farhan
    July 21 2013
694 · Jun 2013
Leelan Farhan Jun 2013
i want to lick misery
i want to ****** heartache.
is it possible to hold pain?
to grasp the glass shards
that pierce through flesh;
the edges that cut through
bone and muscle
to make its way to your heart?
is it possible to taste the bitterness
that you've caused me?
my tongue is searching for the sour --
the sting that will help me know
it isn't all in my head.
is it possible to bottle my thoughts?
contain all the memories i have of you?

i don't know if i'd burn them
or bury them between my sheets.

© Leelan Farhan
   June 20 2013
674 · Dec 2014
Leelan Farhan Dec 2014
when you hate yourself so much that you can feel it in your bones
and nothing feels as good as the tightening around your throat
and physical pain is just a distraction from the empty darkness in your soul

when you dig down deep inside but find nothing but carcasses of thoughts
and even though the memories are vague, the emotion has yet to rot
and despite their blurred outlines, scars, you have not forgot

when you know that they have skinned you, left you tarred and feathered
left you out to fend for yourself in the harshest of weather
you know, deep inside, that
someday it will all be better

672 · Apr 2014
Leelan Farhan Apr 2014
I used to hide out in blankets of ice
behinds walls of steel
reading a book written in his blood.
I used to let his ink seep into my nerves
and down into my spine
dissolving the backbone I once had.

I used to cover the mirror with rose-coloured tape
hoping to shy away from self-loathing
while laughter left my lips in bouts.
I cut my hair, hoping it would cut him out
and grow happiness in its absence.

But then you snuck into the crook of my heart
through the cracks in my skin.
And you saw a body pulsing with more than just blood
more than just flesh and bone and muscle.
You can trace my anger with your eyes
and settle the fear that ignites my bones.
I almost ran away, clutching my brokenness to my
chest but you didn’t let go.
You’re the first to make my tongue bleed with
happiness and melt my ribs into your body.

You taste like sin and smell like trouble
but I’ve never been good enough to care.
And even though I swore I’d never falter over
another man’s face as long as I lived,
all that’s ever been missing
was you.  

© Leelan Farhan
    Sunday April 13, 2014

- this is the first (positive??) poem I've written about someone...
655 · Jun 2013
Leelan Farhan Jun 2013
I constantly envision myself swimming through the sea
Where there are sharks incessantly nipping at my feet
Waves crash on over my head, drowning out existence
I try to push, pull over the tide, with great persistence.

But no matter how fast I try to swim,
It seems that the tide always wins.

629 · Aug 2013
don't tell me, show me
Leelan Farhan Aug 2013
It’s funny that as a writer I trust actions more than words - perhaps it’s because I know they’re used with manipulative intention - they’re meant to bury truth, hide it with sugar-coated, superfluous syntax.
© Leelan Farhan
    August 12 2013
627 · Jul 2013
Leelan Farhan Jul 2013
You tried to sculpt me out of white stone
But the Underworld is my comfort zone
Evil is all I'll ever know

You tried to put a crown on me
Made of vines and green leaves
But I've sinned too much to look like Eve

I'm not an angel, no feathers in my spine
You can stick them on with tape
But my scales will still shine

Atë is the Greek goddess of mischief, ruin, delusion and folly.
Shoutout to my friend Monica: I said the line "I've sinned too much to look like Eve" to her and she responded with "sounds like a line out of a song". And so this formed.

© Leelan Farhan
    July 16 2013
626 · Mar 2014
Small Giant
Leelan Farhan Mar 2014
Although my height has not grown in years, with every day that I grow older, with each experience, I feel farther and farther away from the ground - head racing towards the clouds, yet body still somehow planted on foreign land.

Leelan Farhan
March 22 2014
623 · Jul 2013
permanent accidents
Leelan Farhan Jul 2013
Fingers wrapped around throat
Words pricking your soul
-- little thorns that ebb into your heart,
into your mind.
The image forever framed in
gothic black;
Hung in an alley of my darkest memories.
                                   "I'm not *******
                                         playing around"

A scene from a movie
-- an extra reel of their life
that I heroically,
stepped into. Only to be told
to *******

We no longer wish to carry the burden
of other lives.
But some things have been ******
within the view of my eyes,
whether I wish to see them, or bid them
                         911, what's your emergency?

I think our souls are falling apart.

some things cannot be unseen, and they leave your mind going around in endless circles.
© Leelan Farhan
    July 22 2013
Leelan Farhan Jun 2013
You think I don't believe in the compliments you spin
When it's opening your words
And finding nothing but dust
That causes me to
f a l t e r

615 · Jun 2013
love's graveyard
Leelan Farhan Jun 2013
I tried to drown your memory with his cologne
But when I got home all I wanted to do was *****.
And no matter how many times I wash my clothes
and wash my body
I feel him poisoning my skin.
Even now as I lie broken
from his theatrics
you  still haunt the cemetery of my mind.

607 · Jun 2013
Leelan Farhan Jun 2013
I’m sorry
I’m sorry
I’m sorry that you can’t
Love me.
I’m so hard to swallow
My words are lined with glass shards
My voice is never airy
I’m just a jumbled mess
And I’m sorry
I’m sorry I’m not put together
I’m sorry that I can’t let go
I want to
I’m sorry I won’t break down these walls
But it’s gonna take more than an axe
I’ve already tried that
I’ve tried everything
But I’m trapped
And I’m sorry you can’t love me
I can’t even love myself

I found this in my blog archive. Winter was never my season - all my darkness seems to seep from there.
© Leelan Farhan
    January 2013
594 · Jun 2013
still water
Leelan Farhan Jun 2013
they try to find me another
push me out towards the sea
but I'm still drowning
in your river
still craving the way
your water kissed my knees

they tell me I deserve to be engulfed
by waves
but all I want is silence
the ocean is too loud

your still water
is all I need

© Leelan Farhan
     June 4 2013
589 · Jun 2013
isolation (10w)
Leelan Farhan Jun 2013
you can still feel
with a pulse and
© Leelan Farhan
    June 2013
584 · Mar 2014
Poet's Town
Leelan Farhan Mar 2014
Life. Eyes. Skin and blood.
Just a little pain
There are always walls
Time. Flesh and tongue.
Voice broken open
Veins bleed
Face away
Hands break
Head drowning
They’ll smile, maybe
He’s oxygen
Black sweat
They die like God
© Leelan Farhan
   March 9 2014
   Just a little something I threw together using the word's page - the abandoned town of my mind.
578 · Jun 2013
Empty Minded (Haiku)
Leelan Farhan Jun 2013
Her skull;
sallow and broken -
full of decay
ruined beyond repair.

My first haiku in a very, very long while. Never been too great at these.
© Leelan Farhan
    June 2013
573 · Mar 2014
reject's cave
Leelan Farhan Mar 2014
I should have known
that it would amount to nothing.

- you wanted to dig for diamonds
but I could only ever give you gold
© Leelan Farhan
   March 5 2014
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