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I wanted to be your lover,
And I still do.
You will be my dream lover, forever.
I have no choice, and neither do you,
Neither of us can escape my dreams.
I think you ought to know,
There aren't just pictures in my head,
There are words, too.
All the messages you ever sent me,
Playing over and over again, on repeat.
That's why I can't recover,
That's why I can't let you go.
You are eternally perfect, saying and doing and writing
All the right things.
I need you back in my life, flawed and deficient,
And then I'll want you in a different way,
One that will be easier to quash.
Yes, the title is taken from the Coldplay song, 'Fix U'.
Is there
Or isn't there
A storm coming?
Yes, oh yes, there most definitely is.

It's going to be vicious, and ugly
And angry, this storm.
Lashing will happen.
Winds will roar,
My head, throat and heart are sore,
Longing for
The release of this storm,
The one they've promised me,
The one that's guaranteed.

Outside, rain falls, but gently.
Where are the buffeting torrents,
The groaning, ghastly gales?
I feel cheated.
I was so ready
For pathetic fallacy.
Deliver, or be ****** forever,
Gods of weather.
Your guru's fail us,
Buffet and hail us.

They told us to batten down the hatches,
But I'm ready to fling the windows wide open
And welcome the chaos and the debris,
I'm ready!
Where are the flying branches?
I want and need terror,
But someone's made an error...
My storm is undelivered,
Consequently, so am I.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-24690552
did you see him,
the stranger,
coming  
crotch rocketing  
down your tree lined street?  
did you see the child  
his sandy hair splayed
by his own journey  
flying through the dusk  
pedaling his bike pell-mell to eternity,
or the end of the block  
where his father stood akimbo,
talking soccer, while mother
washed the windows of her SUV  
did you recognize the whine
of accelerating RPMs bouncing
off the safe houses,
the cleansed castles
where time’s dust was chased away  
by growing mutual funds  
and manicured hands
before it had time gather
as dust ultimately must  
did you see him  
coming
to spoil your story  
with a mangled pile  
of flesh and Tommy Hilfiger
so far from the desert bombs  
your labors paid to build  
did you hear the sound
of your own breath when  
you ran to see    
or did the screams
of all the mothers
of all the stars  
awaken you from a dream  
did you sleep that night
without the sight of white death  
in the fields of suburbia  
far from where blood
was written to be spilled
by darker skin under blackened skies  
forever invisible to your eyes?
written while in the clutches of writers block, whatever that means
The morning comes a minute too soon
Before my R E M cycle has finished kicked in
I wasn’t mentally prepare to face another day
So, here I am once again: undone

The autumn leaves blanket the cold October ground
  covering Jack' o lantern face and my front lawn
While my candid thoughts were on Halloween spooky night song
~~~~~~~~~~
The loud screams, of trick or treats,
was heard all around this gloomy town
small tots all dress up in hideous costumes
once more my thoughts consume
black coffins,  black spiders and black werewolves,
the most creepiest sound and display on route 69
~~~~~~~~~'
Grown folks hiding behind the masks of darkness
another long night of evil spirits, ghosts and witches
on the darkest night of the year..
~~~~
Toddlers with Tiaras are on the verge of tears
what a lose-lose situation:
from beginning to end
~~~~
October is the time for frightening masks:
November is the season for hideous farm killings
Doom day is coming;
I welcome all of you to the darkest time of the year;
Happy Halloween, happy Halloween
Happy Halloween my global friends
I feel the warden staring down at me.
Is he staring at the furrowing of my pensive brow,
smirking as my thoughts churn endlessly?
Getting a kick out of these antsy lips,
Laughing at the wretch with flighty focus?
Laughing
at the reddening in my eyes
as a trembling, glossy veil surfaces? I’m done here. Leave me alone. I just want to
Focus.

The warden sinks his long, icy fingernails into my collarbones .
A winter frost crawls up my neck.
His wicked tongue slithers into my ear and poisons my potential.
My thoughts churn until they are on fire.
I claw at my eyes, and see my
Autonomy,
encapsulated inside a foggy membrane.

The warden callously twirls the key
to a world beyond my anxiety.
remember when all we had was each other?
i wake up with the same joints creaking, but this time
thunderstorms applaud through my
spine.
my lips haven’t kissed yours enough, and i’m so parched, parched
parched.
poker face, but you have flipped through my every chapter,
every volume, swallowed the covers.
remember when all we had each other?
i’m terrified

that there’s so much more than
you.
 Oct 2013 Laurel Elizabeth
avital
the more i think about it, entangled must be one of the worst things to be
caught in someone's scheme or lie
the knot that your mother could not possibly comb out of your hair,
the blurred boundaries of what is simply dreaming and what is not
for it is potentially the most perilous
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