Melanie Jackson: Poems

Jan 2021 · 57

Melanie Jackson Jan 2021

watching the time pass
as seconds turn into minutes
and then into hours
i realize that im wasting my time
waiting for you

Jan 2021 · 78

the steps to fall in love

Melanie Jackson Jan 2021

the steps to fall in love

S T E P 1
he smiles at me
a smile i've never understood
we spark a conversation
and it becomes a kind of flow
to step of the bus
and search for his smile
S T E P 2
our conversations become more personal
we relive our pasts
and each savor the moments we spend together
and each brought closer
and then you ask me to be your girlfriend
S T E P 3
you say a word
it has four small letters
but for the first time i believed them
i was surprised that it rolled off my lips
and that i meant it
S T E P 4
we go on dates
we fall in love
we laugh
we go to a parade
we watch movies
and i realize i do truly love you

Jan 2021 · 44

Running

Melanie Jackson Jan 2021

Running

at first the trees blur past
my life washed behind me
my thoughts washed behind me
but then my body cant handle
i slow to a snail pace and the memories flood in
and sometimes i miss what we had
and others i blame myself for leaving you behind
but all i can do now is keep
R U N N I N G

Jan 2021 · 106

missing him

Melanie Jackson Jan 2021

missing him

washes over me in waves
like when I see that shade of blue
Just like your eyes
and i have to sit down
because i become dizzy with memories
of him holding me
and i can still feel his fantom touch
even when were not close to each other
and i realize then that i am
M I S S I N G H I M

Jan 2021 · 97

breathing

Melanie Jackson Jan 2021

breathing

as i breath in the smoky air
falling around me
as you walk into my life
i thought i had missed you
but i've already moved on
if only to allow myself
to walk back out of your life
because with you i quit
B R E A T H I N G

Dec 2020 · 148

before i go

Melanie Jackson Dec 2020

before i go

it was never the right time
when i'd hit you up
i kept telling myself i love you
but i was just kidding myself
all of our moments dragging along
cause i still cant tell you
the words that i needed to say
and you hurt me under the surface
and our troubled waters growing cold
i will heal but you wont
so before i go
i want you to know
that this isnt your fault
and im sorry that there's nothing i can say
to stop your hurting
please dont let your mind make you feel so worthless
before i go

Dec 2020 · 67

these two boys

Melanie Jackson Dec 2020

these two boys

i found a boy
he told me i was going to be a star
opened the door
helb me through the dark
and hes perfect on paper
but hes lying to my face
i think he
somehow thinks i need to be saved
and there's someone else
hes from my past
tried to fall in love
but it never seemed to last
because the second i let him in he pushes me away
and i cant fight for your love
if you cant meet me halfway

Dec 2020 · 56

loving each other

Melanie Jackson Dec 2020

loving each other

F A L L,
it is a season
its what we do in love
its how we end ourselves
when we fall in the dirt
when were covered in dust
when the others words wom there way in
and our minds begin to betray
the person we thought we we're
i just wish we hadn't found love in
E A C H O T H E R

Dec 2020 · 40

plume

Melanie Jackson Dec 2020

plume

a
feather
that tells a story
written in words
that when my time
came to be i on
ly forgot to
speak leavi
ng me
br
o
k
e
n

Dec 2020 · 36

language

Melanie Jackson Dec 2020

language

love is a
L A N G U A G E
one i have only just learned to
S P E A K
your words taught me
Q U I C K L Y
even though i fear your language will be my
D E M I S E

Dec 2020 · 45

what i leave behind

Melanie Jackson Dec 2020

what i leave behind

our picture perfect memories
pick me up and off the floor
cant help finding myself
looking back on the days before
and i wonder if i ever cross your mind
i miss every thing i up and left behind
sorry to the people i left for a better life
i seems that leaving you behind has brought me
to a place were i no longer find
pain and brokenness left in the tracks i leave behind

Dec 2020 · 78

clean

Melanie Jackson Dec 2020

clean

"i wish i had something to do"
i say hoping you will understand
"you could always clean my house for me"
you respond and i realize you dont
"whats wrong"
you question half an hour later
"im overwhelmed and i just need to do something"
i whimper trying to avoid the oncoming tears
"its not that big of a deal jesus just go clean"
you respond insensitively
and so i cry leaving the room
"you better be getting up to clean"
you state as angry as you can
"why cant you just understand i'm having an attack"
but you cant you only think i know how to
clean

Dec 2020 · 50

dreams inside

Melanie Jackson Dec 2020

dreams inside

the spirits lead me through my
D R E A M S
but it seems that my dreams are only to deceive
my eyes and my mind
from the brokenness that lies
I N S D E

Dec 2020 · 51

broken world

Melanie Jackson Dec 2020

broken world

like a cloud you are dazed
constantly unfazed
by the horrors around you
to blind to care
if the sun sets
on a broken world

Dec 2020 · 51

cardboard box

Melanie Jackson Dec 2020

cardboard box

sometimes it feels like
im living in a box
like the cardboard walls
are the things im supposed to live up to
but i can never reach the top of

Dec 2020 · 38

secondhand-smoke

Melanie Jackson Dec 2020

secondhand-smoke

like a cloud
it fills he room
i sit in a daze
caught to in this smog
but i guess i will always smell your
S E C O N D H A N D - S M O K E

Dec 2020 · 92

before i found you

Melanie Jackson Dec 2020

before i found you

before i met you i never felt good
E N O U G H
before i let you in i was ready to
G I V E U P
my tears welled up in my
E Y E S
i felt like i had no more
T I M E
and then i let you in
to a world i never
S H O W
and you helped guide me through
every doubt i have
so when i say those words
i really mean them because
I
L O V E
Y O U

Dec 2020 · 51

candle wax heart

Melanie Jackson Dec 2020

candle wax heart

he said he loved me
i knew he did
he said he needed me
i knew it was true

so i gave him my heart
let his kindness drip
like candle wax filling
the holes others
had created in my heart

Dec 2020 · 36

loving him

Melanie Jackson Dec 2020

loving him

his smile holds a
K I N D N E S S
his eyes hold an
I N T E N S I T Y
that's so soft it surprised me
his arms hold me so
T I G H T L Y
even when i feel like im slipping
his dreams are so
B E A U T I F U L
even when we argue about a family

Dec 2020 · 42

to save you

Melanie Jackson Dec 2020

to save you

naive is to young
as grass is to green
if someone taught me this sooner
i think i would have grown happier

smile is to fake
as sky is to blue
i wonder if i learned this sooner
if i would have been able to save you

Dec 2020 · 61

Fun

Melanie Jackson Dec 2020

Fun

Fun, go have fun
Fun, you say
as if you don't understand
the second you turn your back
this man you invited into your home
is going to **** away my inisints
Fun, as if allowing him to pay you in drugs
is enough, but i know he will be back
but i guess if this is your idea of fun
then i suppose it is
because i am to listen to my mother
aren't i?

Dec 2020 · 34

our colors

Melanie Jackson Dec 2020

our colors

he is blue like a summer sky
soft warm happy
im red like the blood of an animal
broken cold damaged
but together we are purple like lavender petals
light cool loving

Dec 2020 · 52

hand to hold

Melanie Jackson Dec 2020

hand to hold

one day when we grow old
i hope i will still have your hand to hold
and as the years pass us
i hope it never comes to pass
that i lose your hand i love to hold

Dec 2020 · 44

soulmate

Melanie Jackson Dec 2020

soulmate

His eyes are the stars
Shining an guiding me through the darkest night
His lips are the waves
Pulling me in and crashing into my embrace
His hands are the sun
Reaching me warming me through the day
His love is the breeze
Blowing through my hair dancing lightly against my skin
His smile is a fox
Coning and brilliant as he zips his way through the trees
His happiness is a river
Flowing through me like its an addition of my soul

Dec 2020 · 26

when they say we had it worse

Melanie Jackson Dec 2020

when they say we had it worse

i almost think your mad at me
like how you like to say you had it worst
but now you cant
because i was sexually assaulted
like its my fault
like its my bad
like how could i let something like that happen
how could i have gone though something worse
then your parents divorced
but wait aren't my parents divorced to
but no i dont get that crutch
because i was 3
and you were 16

Dec 2020 · 35

going to bed angry

Melanie Jackson Dec 2020

going to bed angry

everytime we both break down and cry
and you say you hate me
and you go to bed angry
i pray that it will be alright
cause i know you think im lazy
but its because my mind is so busy
and i wish you could understand my life
cause im still fighting the demons you created
but i know i cant explain to you
because even though your my father
you chose not to understand
everything i've been through
so everytime we both break down and cry
can you try not to go to bed angry
because sometimes i wish you could just listen

Dec 2020 · 95

as the stars die

Melanie Jackson Dec 2020

as the stars die

when the stars all die
and you leave us in the cold
are we expected to climb
like were in some kind of hole
when the light all fades
and we waste away
what words would you then
begin to say

Dec 2020 · 41

just wondering

Melanie Jackson Dec 2020

just wondering

if i asked you would you even care
because ive wondered for years
but i guess you will never give me an answer
you would rather drag me along
drag my name in the dirt
because you think your a good parent
i was just wondering
if you would give either of us
A N S W E R S

Dec 2020 · 36

wishing

Melanie Jackson Dec 2020

wishing

sometimes it feels like im wishing
like im dragging this baggage
and calling it a
D R E A M
like if i collect every wish in a jar
and now they are stacked upon my back
and as my baggage grows heavier i find myself
leaving the more important wishes
B E H I N D
i guess i just wish you didnt put the wait of your
W I S H
upon my shoulders because when you did
i forgot my
D R E A M S

Dec 2020 · 47

wanderlust left my soul

Melanie Jackson Dec 2020

wanderlust left my soul

I used to think i was riddled with
W A N D E R L U S T
Moving from one love to the next
One heartbreak right back to another
And each time i felt
L E F T
Behind, like i wasn't worth such time
And sometimes i felt like i was losing
M Y
Self in there cruel words but now it seams
I have found someone perfect for me
Like somehow the universe linked my
S O U L
With yours and maybe soulmates are real after all

Nov 2020 · 42

time

Melanie Jackson Nov 2020

time

T I M E,
you say i wish we had more
T I M E
like the minuets could stop ticking
like we could hold each second for
H O U R S
so we could stay close in this moment
F O R E V E R
i laugh before saying
if only i could stop the clock and freeze
T I M E

Nov 2020 · 78

write

Melanie Jackson Nov 2020

write

write me a song
a small one that i can sing
A L O N G
i dont want to dance alone
so write me your favorite
S O N G
if only so i can understand
your elaborate
M I N D

Nov 2020 · 60

girl

Melanie Jackson Nov 2020

girl

he said to me you are beautiful
he said i was proud to call you my
G I R L
he said i love you for who you are
no makeup needed for you
G I R L
he said in that black dress
you occupy my head
and i love you
G I R L

Nov 2020 · 50

future

Melanie Jackson Nov 2020

future

from a kid not understanding love
from a little sixth grader who listened to rumors
to a young lady
who could feel the magic in your touch
and to realize the truth
that in you i will always see my
F U T U R E

Nov 2020 · 46

thanksgiving

Melanie Jackson Nov 2020

thanksgiving

welcome to thanksgiving
lets sit around the table
and pretend we don't know that your not about to
E L O P E
the marriage that you've had for seven years
and lets pretend your not about to blame it on
M E

welcome to thanksgiving
lets sit around the table
and pretend we arent trying to ignore the ever growing
A N X I E T Y
that has been banging in my chest
and lets not talk about the trauma i hide
U N D E R N E A T H

welcome to thanksgiving
lets sit around the table
and pretend that we are all so overly
H A P P Y
as we eat food to avoid the conversation
and lets not talk about the people who have caused us
P A I N

but i promise i will sit around your table
and play nice and be a part of this
F A M I L Y

Nov 2020 · 68

clear

Melanie Jackson Nov 2020

clear

i wish i could say my road was
C L E A R
hell i wish i could tell you that it will be
E A S Y
but i cant because itwill never be
S I M P L E
but i want you to know that even if the roads not
C L E A R
that i will always say that i
L O V E Y O U

Nov 2020 · 51

let him go

Melanie Jackson Nov 2020

let him go

im a dirt road
and a blue sky
dancing in the clouds
wondering through life
im kind
im crazy
im everything he dreamed i would be
i guess thats why he chose me
just a small town girl
and he knows he drives me crazy
even when were dancing
spinning me around
until he gives me a kiss
and it would be impossible to
L E T H I M G O

Nov 2020 · 47

mine

Melanie Jackson Nov 2020

mine

My heart rest against yours
I can feel my matching your beat
I can feel the skin on your lips brush against me
I can feel your strong callused hands
Tracing the line of my jaw
My lips meet yours each time longing for more
Each time like a lightning bolt
I try not to melt
Though i know its to late
Hes eyes watch me carefully
As i lean in closer
I give you a kiss
Those lips like a soft cushion
Those silver blue eyes
Glisen in lamplight
Lamps that you have created
In that beautiful mind
I'm just happy that i can call you
M I N E

Nov 2020 · 48

our sparks

Melanie Jackson Nov 2020

our sparks

his eyes rest upon mine
i work to stay calm
his lips trace my skin
i try not to melt into the fireworks
his hands hold me
i hope he cant see the way i melt
his love engulfs me
i wish i could hold him forever
his heart beat quickens
i realize im not the only one hiding the
S P A R K S

Nov 2020 · 31

written in

Melanie Jackson Nov 2020

written in

Written in these pages are the stories that i wont
R E P L A C E
Written in these lines is the love i could never
F A K E
I sware when i get older i will look back on these pages just to
T H I N K
Cause written in these paragraphs are the stories of
Y O U & M E
And i hope that one day i will be able to say that we were
H A P P Y
But for now i promise to stay
A R O U N D
i'll keep you company before our bodies hit the
G R O U N D
Cause every piece and part of me wants to love you
F O R E V ER
even if i cant hold onto you right
N O W
So i promise that i'll be there for you if only i can love you from a
F A R
And though i'm not in your arms i promise that i feel you in my
D R E A M S
So as these years go by one day i will have nights were you hold onto
M E
So written in these pages are the stories of the happiest years of my
L I F E

Nov 2020 · 39

lovely

Melanie Jackson Nov 2020

lovely

his eyes are as blue as the ocean there,
L O V E L Y
when his arms pull me close
and his heart beats fast
everything is inside his mind is
L O V E L Y
his smile reminds me of a fox
his sideways grin
makes my heart throb
and i think that this boy is absolutely
L O V E L Y

Nov 2020 · 60

dear tony,

Melanie Jackson Nov 2020

dear tony,

i could start this by explaining
that sometimes i forget myself
some days i let the past
catch up with me
some days i feel more broken and damaged
then loving and happy
but those are things you already know

maybe i could begin by recalling
our first kiss
your lips so sweet
your eyes so blue
sparkling like the ocean when the sun hits it just right
your hands pulling me closer against your chest
but is that really the start

i could start by retelling you
the story of the football games
there were two
before the second one finished we were drenched
the cold fall air nipping at our cheeks
we jumped into your dads truck
and you pulled me close
the day i fell asleep on your shoulder
as the heat from the truck ran against our skin
as we shared each others heat
but you probably remember that

i could start by talking about that night
when you kissed my lips
when you tasted like sugar
when i felt like my world was slipping it your hands
when we couldnt even focus on the show
cause the taste of each others lips drove us closer
but you cant forget that night if you wanted too

maybe i could start by talking about
the morning i woke up with a hickey
and spent an hour trying to cover it
the day my step mother asked too many questions and blew my cover
the morning i texted you frantically
covered in an old turtle neck shirt
but i bet u can still feel my panic

but maybe our story starts back in sixth grade
when i first met you
we dated for a week and then i listened to rumors
i broke up with you and when you tried to talk to me
i punched you in the jaw
but secretly i remembered your kindness
and each time i was hurt by someone
i remembered how understanding you were
but back then it was just puppy love

or maybe i should begin with something i realised today
your eyes are blue
there as captivating as the ocean
and they hold just enough mystery to intrigue me
but not enough to leave me in the dark
your honesty makes me feel like i belong
and those deep blue eyes make me feel like i could stay
but i think i already say that to much

this is a work in progress but whats everyone think any advice would be appreciated

Oct 2020 · 66

dreamer

Melanie Jackson Oct 2020

dreamer

dreamer
that's what he is
a dreamer
my heart is his
this dreamer
has been so good
like im dreaming
something done by only cupid

Oct 2020 · 52

his songs, my poems

Melanie Jackson Oct 2020

his songs, my poems

the old maple trees
lose there leaves in the breeze
and as summer is gone
and fall has begun
i found someone who cares for me
hes strong as the maples
hes kind as the breeze
just like summer
hes kept me warm
and as fall began he wrote me into his songs
i only hope he understands that like his songs
i've wrote him into my poems

Oct 2020 · 77

concrete poem

Melanie Jackson Oct 2020

concrete poem

his smile made me
forget the world i was running
away from his arms sweeping me
from the fire that was my dysfuncti
onal life and into the stream
that was his
love

Oct 2020 · 96

a boy called love

Melanie Jackson Oct 2020

a boy called love

his eyes shined in the soft sunlight
i found peace in his violence
cant figure out why hes trying
i asked hi his name
and he smiled at me like a fox
and said "i am a boy called love"

Oct 2020 · 54

look in your eyes

Melanie Jackson Oct 2020

look in your eyes

everytime i look in those eyes
my heart pounds outta my chest
and when i feel your lips
its like a soft summertime kiss
under the moon shining so bright
over an od field of knee high
and each time you give me your heart
on the palm of your hand
its like i've never been here before
never been close
never been so happy
except for when i look in your eyes

Oct 2020 · 48

past

Melanie Jackson Oct 2020

past

seems like some piece of me will always lose
each time i choose
swear im right
but is it wrong
am i supposed to be at all
i dont have the energy
not most days
pull myself out of bed
what i would give to see
if the grass was greener
on the side of the fence i cant walk to go
feels like i keep breaking the best things i've ever had
but i know i can never change my
P A S T

Oct 2020 · 140

a boy from the past

Melanie Jackson Oct 2020

a boy from the past

i found a boy
told me i was his world
held the door
held my hand through the dark
and hes a kind boy
hes from my past
and we fell in love
his eyes tell me it will last
and though love is a fight he has met me half way
and i know each time
his lips touch mine
hes the kind of man that is almost impossible to find

Oct 2020 · 54

the ocean we call love

Melanie Jackson Oct 2020

the ocean we call love

a flutter in my chest
ive never felt this before
ive never felt such love
never been so close to a person
never felt myself give my heart so quickly
it used to scare me to dive in the ocean we call
L O V E
i thought i would drown
but you showed me that its easier
to survive the waves from deep within
the waters burning depths
of the ocean we call
L O V E