maybe you chose me based on the convenience
but i wouldnt have given you a second look
had i known the way we wouldve ended
i never wouldve chose you
i wish someone had written me a summary
because i had no idea
i had never seen the signs
i was to young to know any better then your hand
smacks so hard they couldve cut paper
bruises sprinkling my cheeks
yet you still called it pretty
like the bruises you left on me were just your prize

i can still feel the bite
the influence you had on me
i hear it everytime i ask permission
to do things i know he wont care about
like im still your obedient puppy
my head still so full
you broke me down
until i didnt even recognize any of my characteristics
i wonder if in another place at another time
somehow your soul was licensed to torture mine
like a sick contract with the devil
because even when ive left you
left your town
even left your friends
i still see you pop up in every store
staring pretending you didnt become
the most hateful person ive  ever met

ive been working on my karma
trying to out run you
everyday is so much work
to be a better person than you raised

cause ive been working on breaking cycles
trying to escape your circles
i refuse to give light to the trauma you caused
i wont pass it to my next generation

your screams
more blood curdling
than the sound of your beer bottles
smashing agaisnt the wall
even when there right next to my head
even as the cuts brush my cheeks
you take me down
every word poison
ment to **** me just a little more
but in the end
while your destroying my life
your bringing yourself down faster
so really in the end
we both lose

im not stable
baby im 18
i keep checking on you
but dont forget you are supposed to check on me
when every other word out of your mouth
is how stressed you are
but im the one who has nothing
im the one who just lost everything
and with my wounds still open
i had to deal with ones you didnt bother closing
now mine are infected
and i forgot how to heal

Your trauma made you stronger
You can tell me that all you want
But that didn’t make me stronger
It gave me sleepless nights
It left me in tears
I made me stronger
Because I had to deal with the consequences
That weren’t even my fault
I did that
Don’t give trauma any credit
For my strength

Dear someone
Why do I open my doors
Let you take over my world
Occupy my mind
Let you take over my world
Even though I know
You’ll leave me in the end