When you come round to my gaff you know what to expect
All I'm really asking is you treat us with respect
I know that you have your kids and that's okay by us
We don't expect the critics or all that kind of fuss
Your welcome to come round it's really all quite fine
We know you like our company or is it just our wine
Don't criticize our garden through the lack of toys and trains
We don't want all that clutter or any of the strains
Don't keep ****** going on with what Shazza has got
Just because Shazza seems to have the ******* lot
We've heard what you have said so don't treat us like ******* spazzas
If you prefer toys to wine then ******* to ******* Shazza's

Do you know your mind when your under its spell
Chances are your thoughts are in hell
Your intentions flared with rage burning inside
Balance of life's open wide

You've seen death falling from a great height
When you yourself go out into the night
Who's next to die?

It doesn't matter who's the victim no one will save them
No one is with them
Their dead in a second
Your blooded hands with their demise always fulfils you
That's what the kills do
When they gasp and die

Killed In cold blood that's pouring down
No kills the same. . .

When your stalking the night their unaware of the hit
They'll never see the light when it's lit
You've thought things through but its nothing that you'd admit
The murders that you will commit

You've seen knifes cutting through soft skin
But that's the life that you have got yourself in
Killing is your sin

It doesn't matter who's the victim no one will save them
No one is with them
There dead in a second
Your blooded hands with their demise always fulfils you
That's what the kills do
When they gasp and die

Killed In cold blood that's pouring down
A knife in your hand

You like how it feels when their body squeals
There life is gone is what life steels
No kills the same. . .

It doesn't matter who's the victim no one will save them
No one is with them
There dead in a second
Your blooded hands with their demise always fulfils you
That's what the kills do
When they gasp and die
Killed In cold blood that's pouring down
No kills the same
No kills the same
No kills the same
No kills the same
No kills the same
No kills the same

I don't know why football has been dubbed the beautiful game
Who the hell has named it that who the ***** to blame
When I think of something beautiful football is not what I would claim
Wearing their stupid football kits there ugly in my frame
Every boring football game to me looks the ******* same
A bunch of guys in a field looking for a piece of fame
The exorbitant amount cash their paid is why they really came
Trying to impress the wags or bag themselves a dame
If your a fan that's up to you but please would you be tame
Don't be a ******* hooligan forget the opposition maim

Drinking to excess before the match well that is just pathetic
If you have to go to the game why go drunk and paralytic
Is hours of getting tanked up automatic or is it cybernetic
It's hardly surprising your personality isn't charismatic or magnetic
Don't act like a ******* ***** don't be so synthetic
Are they trained to be wankers or is it just genetic
What's beautiful about the drunkenness we're not so sympathetic
Football kits are not day wear or a fashionable cosmetic
Why waste your time and energy when your ****** and energetic
Endorsing violence with cops and fans justice is not poetic

What's the point of the police force when real crime is on latch
All the cops are wasting time trying to bust the football batch
If football matches are that bad then close the ******* hatch
And for a change why don't the cops protect a different patch
We don't want police on horseback or on motorway dispatch
Is it easier to stop coaches cos it's criminals they can catch
Ban all the ******* hooligans enforce a ticket ******
Revoke their rights to seasoned games with a stadium detach
What about the real crime, coppers don't make a scratch
Why should my taxes go to the cops to patrol the match

What's beautiful about Hillsborough when there's no safe place to hide
The disaster of 96 football fans they all got crushed and died
Where was the protection of the innocent when the gates where open wide
There's nothing beautiful about never walking alone when no ones by your side
Riots break out in stadiums when the football fans collide
328 deaths at Estadio Nacional that's their beauty set aside
What's beautiful about Bradford city 56 fans burned and fried
Is it really all worth dying for to protect your personal pride
How many people have died due to this game this isn't in the guide
How many more disasters, what will it take to turn the tide

Football is not the beautiful game with all the tragedies and rage
Football players should not be awarded such an extortionate wage
Getting paid a huge amount just to play one season
Why are they paid so much what is the ******* reason
Bending it like Beckham does that mean that he his gay
As he is married to Victoria he could have turned that way
The word cups 10 million dollar price tag its shamefully unlawful
Does the FA in the FA cup stand for ******* awful
All the death and disasters its an ugly truth and fact
The hooliganism and violence, well there's nothing beautiful about that

The world is such a cruel place due to corrupt world leaders
1000's of innocent people have died because of those fat bleeders
Enforced False Flags and Cover ups all are rich men feeders
Fake terrorism and illegal wars corruption for war breeders
People believe in what they're shown coming from false pleaders
The public duped with news edits, paid actors and news readers
A life long race for world ******* for competing speeders
Those paying close attention the loyal followers and heeders

Roswell and Area 51:
For years its existence was denied they didn't want you to know
Did a flying saucer crash in 1947 in Roswell New Mexico ?
Where's the debris and Alien Bodies gone, just where did they go ?
Was there a Disc recovered by a ranch has it gone with the flow
Military Announcements of a flying saucer crash was this their woe?
Why was it suddenly a weather balloon was this all done for show?

What are the events surrounding Area 51 and the Roswell crash ?
Was there a second crash site, was there an alien body stash ?
Why did RaaF report a captured Saucer then its gone in a flash ?
Did the Deputy sheriff see a 100ft wide craft or was his claim to rash ?
Was an alien autopsy performed we're the Grays pulled from the ash ?
Maybe there's an alien conspiracy or is it political propaganda trash ?

JFK:
1963 in Dealy Plaza 22nd of November was the day
Shots struck John F Kennedy the President of the USA
An open top limo in Dallas is how they Murdered JFK
Gunmen and the Grassy Knoll was it a government betray ?
The Texas School Book Depository a scapegoat had to pay
Lee Harvey Oswald set to fall, could it have been the CIA ?

Moon Landings:
Where the moon landings faked in 1969 due to the space race ?
Was it really one giant step for mankind or was it a disgrace ?
If there was a lunar landing then why are there no stars in place ?
No crater was created upon touchdown in fact there was no trace
If there is no atmosphere how does the flag flutter in that case ?
Maybe it was a smaller step for man and filmed in a NASA base ?

9/11:
September the 11th 2001 was the day America cried
Innocent citizens where killed nearly 3000 of them died
The fall of the Twin Towers, where there ever planes inside?
Aluminium planes couldn't penetrate steel structures even if they tried
Is there more than meets the eye how much did they really hide?
Was this another false flag event when your own government lied ?

The attack of the World Trade Centre in god we did trust
How did 1,000,000 tons of concrete and steel just turn to dust?
Building 7 fell in 7 seconds a freefall with no hits or ******
Can we trust a government motivated by power greed and lust?
****** is not justified there is no need or must
Even if our world leaders think there is cause or just

Are aliens at Area 51 fake or are they specimens in zoos
I wonder if JFK was murdered for is own political views
Was the moon landings faked and filmed by TV crews
The sheer tragedy of 9/11 I wonder who lit that fuse
There are such terrible men who don't care who they use
All power hungry ******* who want to **** and abuse
The inside jobs and murderers with no regard for taboos
They don't care about the pain or any left over residues

From JFK to 9/11 is it a coincidence they where under the Bush Regime
George Bush was involved with both was it all done with Bush's team
Is George Herbert Walker Bush's memory loss really a blaspheme?
Why could he not recall his whereabouts during JFK's bullet stream?
His son George Walker Bush another from the Bush family ream
Was President on 9/11 his involvement is not what it may seem
What is it with the Bush family do they think they are supreme
Surrounding False Flags and Cover Ups that they can not redeem
It seems so strange that these events are based upon a certain theme
The death of the innocent and cover ups are all done to the extreme
Are False flag operations a rich mans trick to gain political esteem
Why are men aloud to rule the world when ****** is there dream
Are events manipulated to conform with the rich mans scheme
I'm not sure about how you feel but its enough to make me scream

Whether you believe the official reports or draw your own conclusions
There will always be conspiracies some doubts and also some confusions
Shadow governments and inside jobs are they just unjust solutions
False flag events and cover ups are they all government delusions  
Conspiracies and theories do you really think these are illusions
Is fiction mixed with fact so it looks different with inclusions
Do you believe in what you're shown even with edited exclusions
Are there False flags and conspiracies to create conflicting revolutions

Days turn to months, months turn to years
It's too much to take, without your heart here

Hurt from the loss, and hurt from pain
I can't cope without you again

I've been waiting. . . for you for so very long.
And I am hoping. . .we can put things right that went wrong

Don't close your heart, let me in again
Don't lose our love, don't break the chain
I've missed you so much, my mind can not cope
When two hearts are open, there is always hope

And I've been waiting. . . For you for far too long
and I am hoping, For our hearts again to be one

Don't let us lose it all. . .
Don't let us lose it all

(instrumental interlude)

Don't close your heart, let me in again
Don't close your heart, don't break the chain
I've missed you so much, my mind can not cope,
With two open hearts, there is always hope

We've missed to much life, life is to short
There is nothing wrong with hearts that are caught

The hurt is too much, I can't cope with my heart
I need your love,  like it was at the start

And I've been waiting. . . for you for so very long.
and I am hoping, For our hearts again to be one

And I've been waiting. . . For you for far too long
and I am hoping. . .we can put things right that went wrong

Don't let us lose it all. . . No don't let us lose it all

The television is getting worse, I have noticed on its viewing
What the **** is going on, what do you think your doing ?
Maybe its ungrateful, but our minds are just left stewing
Why must people endure repeats, through years of program queuing?
An example is the game shows, there on every side just brewing
We're paying for the privilege, its the public that your *******

We don't want Deal Or No Deal, with all those crap crisp boxes
Q.I. is not that interesting, it has too many paradoxes
Who Wants To Be A Millionaire ? is that just a stupid question?
I would love to Strike It Lucky, so what is your suggestion?

Pointless has the correct name, cos that's exactly what it is
Has Jasper Carrot got Golden *****, or is he *******
Why is there ***** Money, did they ran out of toilet tissues
Julian Clary had Sticky Moments, and outrageous camping issues

Whenever Opportunity Knocks, well just open the door
If your going to Take Me Out, then what are you waiting for?
Don't Name That Tune In One, I'd rather hear it all
A Question Of Sport is so boring, its hardly on the ball

Is it the Weakest Link, because the chain is full of rust?
Didn't Blockbusters close down, and the video shop go bust ?
Why Should I Supermarket Sweep, Dale can sweep it himself
The pyramid Game is just, an apex polyhedron triangular shelf

I Don't want to go on Mastermind, and look like a ******* fool
If I went Through The Keyhole, then I must be minuscule
Why Would I Lie To You? wouldn't that be a bit two faced
I'm not sure if Celebrity Squares, are really all straight laced?
Could you please repeat yourself, I did not Catch that Phrase
Just how many crystals where there, in the Crystal Maze?

Was Spin Star cancelled, because celebrities where break dancing
Or was it Bradley Walsh's giant fruit, that needed some enhancing?
Why is it called The Chase, when there's no chasing involved?
The Chasers are sat on there arses, so The Chase is never solved

I don't think it is the Wheel Of Fortune, even if you do
You don't really get much fortune, till you solve the final clue
Paul Daniels said Every Second Counts, so forget the introductions
Just get on with the game play, don't even bother with instructions

Philip Schofield played with Five Gold Rings, isn't that just wrong
I thought that Five Gold Rings, belonged to a Christmas song
Ted Rogers read such stupid clues, it made it hard to win
No wonder 3.2.1 contestants, usually won poor Dusty Bin

I would really love to drink, some of that Celebrity Juice
But first I'll have to find out, which ones are tight or loose
I'm not lucky enough to have 300 Blanks, with a lovely lady in a bed
I'll have to hand it to myself, and have a Blankety Blank instead

Mr & Mrs is outdated, most Marriages are not enforced
Those couples who where happy once, are probably divorced
Treasure Hunt used a Helicopter, clues found by Anneka Rice
She ran around quite frantically, but her **** was rather nice

Isn't Ann Widdecombe a dark horse, she liked a Cleverdick
I Suspect if she had the chance, she'd like a **** that's thick
There used to be Telly Addicts, but now they are history
We no longer want Noel Edmunds, or crap games on our TV

Poor Bully tried to play Darts, but his aim was far to high
It isn't all that great or Super, missing the Bullseye
Come on now Jim its not fare, making the contestants cry
To look at what you could have won, and kiss the prize goodbye

Naked Jungle was a one off, Keith Chegwin in the buff
I'm glad it did not continue, so please don't Call My Bluff
Countdown has been on for years, we've had a ****** enough
Only Connect and 15 to 1, are hard and far too tough

Family fortunes and Eggheads, we don't want all this stuff
Fort Boyard and Mock The Week, stick them up you chuff
Going For Gold and Gladiators, too old and looking rough
University Challenge and Impossible, there really dull and duff

Never Mind The Buzzcocks, it's a forgotten piece of Fluff
Crosswits and Chain Letters, should be dragged of by the scuff
Hole in the wall and Alphabetical, are so right of the cuff
The Cube and The Million Pound Drop, I'd walk of in a huff

Many game shows throughout the years, all needed a good host
But there isn't any spontaneity, so none of them can boast
Instead of reading from a script,and acting liked their dosed
Take the plunge make it your own, don't be a mindless ghost
Why don't hosts try to be their best, and try to be their most
Wouldn't it make more sense, to keep your audience engrossed

Ben Shepherd comes to mind, he doesn't seem all there
With his ****** expressions, weird smile and stupid stare
How did he become a host, was it all based on a dare
Why is his act robotic, its more than we can bare

Its like watching a recording, this isn't really fare
If we are subjected to this crap, then we deserve a share
I guess its our misfortune, its enough to make you swear
We're already at our Tipping Point, so we no longer care

Now I'm not saying that every host, is as bad as old Ben Shep
In fact there is at least one guy,who has a better Rep
He may not be a large man, in fact he played a Lep
But at least he isn't wooden, and he's with you every step

Warwick Davis's Act is Tenable, and he has not compromised
With good hosting skills, jokes and quips Warwick has realized
Although I'm not a game show fan, I am pleasantly surprised
He stands tall over the other hosts, even though he is pintsized

Why keep making game shows, was there a voting pole?
I believe there are too many, they are so ******* droll
As bad as all reality, the schedules they both stole
Axe the ******* lot of them, and chuck them down a hole

Just take a look at Brucie, may god rest his soul
He was around for decades, and hosting was role
Taking over all the shows, seemed to be old Brucie's goal
The years weren't kind to old Bruce, they definitely took there toll

There is a Brucie Bonus, available for every Generation
All you really needed, was the right kind of motivation
Nice to see you to see you nice, was Bruce's obligation
Life was the name of the game, in a family situation

A cuddly toy on a conveyer belt, in a prize observation
Didn't he do well all, depends on your own determination
If You Play Your Cards Right, Dollies Dealing a sensation
You don't get anything for a pair, maybe its infatuation

You can freeze but you cant stick, all dealt in isolation
Do you want to bet on it, was a gambling invitation
The price was always right, just use your imagination
Come on down to old Bruce, win a car and a vacation

Maybe he's a legend, with Bruce's game show graduation
A chance to host a new show, a Good Game realization
What's on the board miss ford, moving on to a new creation
It turned camp when they shut that door, and hired Larry Grayson

What was it with Bruce Forsyth, he was far too keen
He monopolised the hosting, on the game show scene
Seizing every opportunity, ever since he was fourteen
Just like Command and Conqueror, on the TV screen
He took on all the game shows, maybe he's just mean
But I cant help but to wander, where else has he been?

With all of his catchphrases, and a chin that was obscene
A wig that was like shredded wheat, it never should be seen
I don't know if I'm being harsh, it maybe his routine
And its all in his makeup, and part of Bruce's gene
Perhaps he liked the studio, and had too much caffeine
Along with the all dodgy food, in the BBC canteen

Now Challenge screens the game shows, but there all so ******* old
We've already seen all these games, they've already all been sold
I do not mean to sound too flippant, but why wont you be told
Your sending your viewers up the wall, and your audiences cold
Now let me state what's obvious, I hope I am not too bold
We don't want all these rehashed games, there hardly TV gold

All the classic adverts a lot of them are missed
Adverts that are made today the producers must be ******
They're nothing like the classic ads I'm afraid I must resist
There isn't any flare or finesse so please would you desist
The same adverts are always shown there's no surprise or twist
Adverts are not liked these days I hope you get the gist
Your all just sitting there with you ***** clutched in your fist
Messing up your nice pressed suits with a swift one of the wrist
New adverts bore you to tears but it's all that you enlist
Cos your making more backhanders it's why you still persist
Stop relying on the sponsors we know there **** is kissed
And take particular notice of the old ones on this list

A skeleton with video tapes told us how its gonna be
Re-record not fade away with Scotch's lifetime guarantee
Whiskers was the food of choice according to the stats
It was preferred by at least eight out of ten cats
Noodle Doodle twisted spaghetti into motor cars and houses
He twisted it into butterflies and eek noodle doodle mouse's
A hippo made a fruity drink way down in the Congo
He danced a dainty tango and a rhino called it Um Bongo
There was only one Tea that could make you go OO!
Sue Pollard and Frankie Howard found out with Typhoo
But those little Tetley Tea Folk know without a doubt
That 2000 perforations would let the flavour flood out
You knew what to do to put the freshness back
Every time you vacuumed and did the Shake and Vac
Don't wake up and go to town use the one all over smell
Insignia's shampoo and deodorant, aftershave and shower gel
Jeremy had a roaring toothache again he liked to many treats
he could have had a crocodile smile without eating sweets
She was the Right One she would skate to get it there
Nicollete Sheridan delivered Martini anytime anyplace anywhere
A second class ticket to Dottingham a misunderstanding caper
Tunes could make you breath more easily with its Menthol vapour
Milk in every half pound one chunk lead to another
With a glass and a half for every Dairy Milk lover
Muhammad Ali and Benny Hill knew their coming fate
They watched out with a Humphrey about, drinking Unigate

If your into protection with your Mate's or a Durex
You'd get that rubber feeling during penetrative ***
Unless your like Fred Brewster and Geronimo was there
A friend that was washable and like an inner tube to wear

A chocolate bar sang about everybody's case of the Fruit and Nut
David Rappaport could tell it was Tizer when his eyes where shut
Kia Ora's to orangey for crows, it was just for him and his dog
Spuds wanted to be Smiths Crisps and not an average Joe Blog
Bars Iron Brew from Girders the Scottish people like
A second thought at junctions think once think twice think bike
You Crossed your heart for a better figure with a Playtex Bra
The Renualt Clio had a certain flair for Nicole and Papa
Flowers delivered from Interflora making your day bright
It was a taste to make you shine ohhh ohhh Vitalite
Sainsbury's world war one solders shared and called a truce
Maynard's Wine Gums set the juice loose aboot the hoose
Why would you have cotton when Galaxy was silk?
It was cool for cats when you woke up to Milk
The man from Del Monte loved fresh fruit so he said Yes
Frosty's where Grrreat, Tony Tiger expected nothing less
But Esso was the only petrol with a tiger in the tank
A galloping black horse was the icon for Lloyds bank

Its your life with Tampax you jumped around and skated
Jack Dee had John Smiths, was his Widget overrated ?
Flowers where given on Impulse hoping the ladies dated
Mr Soft loved Trebor mints a strange world was created
Flake was the Crumbliest chocolate was that understated?
Marmite was the kind of spread you loved or even hated
Michelin Man was made of tyres he was rubber weighted
A family always had there diner, with Oxo it was plated

Castlemain Four X wouldn't give anything else, Australians would preach
Unless you where Paul Hogan and Fosters Amber Nectar he would teach
But Heineken would refresh the parts other beers could not reach
Strongbow was strong straight and true made from apple and not peach
Broad at the shoulders slim at the hips Big Bad Dom Domestos Bleach
The Jolly Green Giant loved Sweet corn with his ** ** ** speech

Please broadcast something good, instead of all your trash
There is No Cornetto's from Italy! none shown from this stash
Like Cadburys and Nestle or the robot men from Smash
You had a break with Kit Kat and convenient packet mash
No Dr Whites ***** Pads I don't mean to sound so brash
Where is Castrol GTX or Buzby there's not even a rehash
All Gambling and Insurance Ads tying to get our cash
No concern about the national debt or any loan backlash

Rolf Harris teaching kids to swim in the water they did love it
I bet if they where around today they'd tell old Rolf to shove it
I felt sorry for that poor Churchill dog I admired his endurance
To put up with Rolfs wobble board that isn't much insurance

Jimmy Saville talked of safety he clunked clicked every trip
But Jimmy's mind was somewhere else thinking who he'd like to strip
And British Rail where unaware when he was trying not to slip
With Jims intent with his Railcard to get you in his grip

You may think its controversial, you may think its the wrong call?
I Guarantee the companies thought they where on the ball
I bet these ads are a blot and drive them up the wall
If they'd have known about these guys they wouldn't feel so small
These companies would not have hired Jim or Rolf at all
It doesn't matter if they're the ones who are not standing tall

Why cant new adverts be like the old ones that we had?
What's happened to production why are they so bad?
They are all so boring and there really rather sad
None of them are out there that make you feel so glad
Why do you insist on showing ones that drive us mad
Your viewers are so ******* board more than just a tad
everyone is getting annoyed even our mum and dad
stop showing the new adverts stop ruining our pad

We don't want life insurance or sponsors for every show
We don't want Go Compare adverts, the Gtech can surely go
There are no Classic overtones they've lost that certain glow
Its boring seeing the same adverts shown in the same row
Phone commercials are not wanted it may be quite a blow
Loans and expensive Sky packages the people should say no
Please would you take some advice stop keeping these in tow
And bring back all the classic ads and stop going with the flow