Are you wanking in your stockings in the halls.
It's time that us guys **** and squeeze our *****
We will ride an ugly old old dear
It's their ***** we want to slay
We'd love to ******* silly for the day

[Chorus:]
So here it is merry **** time
Everybody show your ***,
look at our arseholes now
We really need to ***.

Are you waiting for the fat slags to arrive?
I'm sure their big ***** have plenty room inside
The old ***** always tell you
That their ***** are the best
And their ***** are better than the rest

[Chorus:]
So here it is, Merry **** time
Everybody show your ***
Look at our hairy *****
We really need to ***

Who are you going to do
When your mother has her bit of a *****
Oooh oo oooh oohh

Are you wanking in your stockings in the halls
We'll **** your old fat mother when she calls
We will **** her on the hillside
That's where she will get laid
We'll *** deep inside her
When her legs are splayed

[Chorus:]
So here it is. Merry **** time
Everybody show your ***
Look at our **** holes now
We really want to ***

So here it is, Merry **** time
Everybody show your ***
Look at *** holes now
We really need to ***

So here it is, Merry **** time
Everybody wants a ***
Take your knickers down
We always need to ***

So here it is, Merry **** time
Everybody wants a ***
(It's **** time!)
Get up her ******* now
We really need to ***

******-man, ******-man
Does whatever a ****** can
Wanks a **** any size,
He'll undo your trouser flies
Watch Out!
Here **** the ******-man.

Does he ***?
listen bud
When he **** its like a flood
he **** from his ***** head
Take a look at his bed
Hey, there
There goes the ******-man

When his suit is to tight
His bulge starts to slime
He wanks through the night
and spunks all the time

******-man, ******-man
Friendly neighborhood ******-man
**** and *****
He's ignored
Tossing is his reward
To him, life is a monkey spank up
Whenever there's **** up
You'll find the ******-man

When your trying to hook up and your told your not their type
I'm not quite sure what this means it's just pretentious tripe
I really do not understand what is everybody's gripe
The concept of a certain type its all contentious hype
What's the difference when your frisky and your sexually ripe
And all you want to do is get between that  furry stripe
Licking your moist *** bits, fingered with a rub and wipe
To achieve the height of ecstasy and excite your fleshy pipe.

If your logically minded then surely there's just two
Ones with inner **** holes, and cocky ones that *****
There is just men and women isn't this just true
It's a simple concept I thought that everybody knew
As far as I'm aware there's no one green or blue
But maybe if your on the ball then you'll be right on cue
Unless you're simple minded and you don't have ******* a clue
Or am I just not seeing it like that old Mr Magoo

Okay you could argue that some fellows like a ****
Or certain ladies prefer their *** underneath a girlie frock
Some people that swing both ways both sexes they don't block
And people who like old and mature this I would not mock.
Maybe you like sleek body's and your mind is in a lock
Or fat obese and overweight, an old fat saggy sock
Personally I go one way Like the hands on a straight clock
But I don't really see the difference this may come as a great shock

So next time someone fancy's you then just you stop and think
If you really want a **** then you give them a wink.
If you want a nice stiff one inside your **** mink
Open your legs apart and they'll **** the bit that's pink
If your into arses then that's the place they'll sink
Its really all the same when you release your ****** ink
So don't be single minded or you will probably stink
There's truly only two types, just don't be the weakest link

Ground floor: pulsators,
**** beads and penal briefs
****** and vibrators
Rubbers and **** sheaths.
Going up!..

First floor: Pheromones,
Gents blow up dolls
Whips, clamps, tassels, peephole bras
Crotchless ******* and body oils. Going up!..

Second floor: **** rings,
Adult films and ***** books
Edible knickers and realistic vaginas
Naked massage and Brothel.
Going down!..

Who do you want to be ******* Mr ******
We hope you like up the ***

We are the boys who will play an ******* game
We are the boys who will make you *** again

So why don't you come and **** us Mr ******
If your into ******* bums

Mr. Brown, he's in town he's only 21
He's bumming in the ally and he's ready with his ***

So come on Mr ******, you can stick your **** in us
If you want to *** us, get on the ******* bus

So please put your **** up our arses Mr ******
We really want it up our bums

Some people often ask me,
why am I so perverted?
Was there a point when things changed,
when I got converted.
I really don't remember,
was it the first time that I flirted?
Or was it when I saw a naked lady,
no knickers and un-skirted
Maybe it was when I had a ****,
when my *** first squirted
or was it the time of my first ****,
and had my **** inserted.
could it have been an ******,
when her **** sprayed and blurted
If its a combination then...
I don't want to be reverted

I believe most people have got the same *******
its from their own point of view just a different version
they've had similar experiences and gone through the same conversation
They would rather be stripped naked with a hard **** insertion
Unclothed and getting ****** a deep wet **** immersion
It is not an attack of character there is no forced incursion
Its just an observation without casting an aspersion
Just admit that you would rather be on a *** excursion
Instead of acting with disgust without making an aversion
So come and get your fannys out and have some **** dispersion
have more ***** than your used to without any more diversion
Once your in that frame of mind don't think of a reversion

So If a lady wanted *** I probably wouldn't stop her
Even if she was all la-de-da and oh so prim and proper
I'll drop my trousers and introduced her to my 9 inch chopper
And hopefully she would think it was a lovely whopper
Slipping her my shinny helmet like a pervy copper
I'd bounce up and down imagining I'm on a posh space hopper
I would love to squirt inside her **** an exploding party popper
she'd get on top and warm me up a tasty toasty topper
I would want us both to ***, I wouldn't want to *** a cropper
She can **** my ***** wonker an everlasting gob stopper
Then we'll do it all again just like a teeny bopper
And when we've finished I hope she'd be a happy shopper.

If this is what you have in mind it proves that your the same
All you're really doing is playing a socialistic game
Your just pretending to be innocent and so ****** tame.
Not admitting to ****** feelings to avoid any kind of blame
Stop acting so refined and prudish it's nothing proud to claim
You should just indulge yourself and don't be so ******* lame
So pull your **** ******* down, reignite your ****** flame
Just stick your fingers up your **** there is no sense of shame

You may be of the opinion it isn't everyone's normality
And **** and **** and ******* **** are the centre of depravity
I think that your just delusional about your own sexuality
and **** what's classed as morals I'm not talking of morality
If you think your less perverse then **** your own tenacity
Your capable of the same thoughts your mind has the capacity
****** acts always take place it's not a matter of mendacity
It's happening world over no matter what your nationality
You may dispute my state of mind no question of insanity
I would rather have a **** and ****, to me it's a formality
And licking a nice wet **** its not just my own mentality
Well **** it I don't care if you think its immoral Immorality

There always seems to be plenty ladies of the night
Some of them are black girls and some of them are white
A few of them will kiss you a few of them may bite
There are ones that **** you those ones are quite alright
All of them will ******* their ***** are not that tight
A lot are quite good looking but lots look ******* *****

All have well used *****'s but that's just what you'd expect
But it doesn't really matter as long as your *****
You may be into **** their ***** you don't neglect
A request to use a rubber their wishes you respect.
Enough cash is needed both holes you can inject
But the price for extra services is higher I suspect

You have to be quite wary there are some well used pro's.
They've been around for years, ***** worn from lots of goes
Their naked body's have been seen in lots of pervy shows.
Just how many ***** they've ******, no one really knows.
So many fellows gobbled off ***** ****** and ***** blows
Some are old and past it but their just ***** hoes

There was one such lady back in my home town.
Her salty ****** was waiting beneath her smelly gown
The guys that she's been ******* had a disconcerting frown
This is why that ugly ***** was always ****** facedown.
Deep inside her crusty **** their ***** would surely drown.
Especially now her **** juices have turned to a dark brown

Why **** a **** that's manky with such a smelly pong.
It isn't good if that filthy stench smells so ****** strong
Stupid fellows ****** that hole using their desperate ****
But Surely ******* that ugly hag must have been so wrong.
I guess it was a testament for her being a ***** so long
And that's why all the locals are singing her this song

And...
Ten-Bob-Annie
Had a manky *****
But still the wankers paid
She was an ugly ***,
Should have just said no
So desperate to get laid.
She didn't charge much,
For her smelly crotch.
It was definitely decayed.
Never used a rubber,
Just a ***** scrubber.
If your willing to downgrade.
She lived down Abbey road
Smells like a commode
A wonder anybody stayed.
Just so that you know,
Her name is Audrey stowe
And she didn't make the grade

When her grandchildren went to school they got teased and ragged.
Because of all the ***** men that Audrey ****** and shagged.
***** got stuck with stickiness some got caught and snagged
That ***** smelly **** of hers should be bound and gagged.
The usage needs preventing it could be sealed and bagged
OR her disgusting antics monitored and electronically tagged

Ten-Bob-Annie was painted on the wall above of Audrey's door
I don't know why she got so upset because it attracted more.
Stupid guys just wanting *** at least there where three or four
Take my advice and steer clear of that worn out ******* *****.
Her daughter Debbie was the same they'll make your shaft so sore
Those two infested well used ***** are nothing to adore

Now Audrey's daughter Debbie she was just as bad.
She ****** just as many men as her ***** mother had.
They wasn't really bothered they would have any lad
Just a couple of fat slags they'd even **** your dad.
But they never got there hands on me of that I was so glad
If I had even gone there well I would have been quite mad