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DC raw love Dec 2014
HOW CAN I WRITE ABOUT THIS
THERE IS ONLY ONE WAY.

1.  YOU CRAVE SOMETHING
2.   YOU WANT IT AGAIN
3.   YOU BEGIN TO LIKE IT
4.   YOU CRAVE IT AGAIN
5.   YOUR CRAVINGS ARE NOT ENOUGH
6.   IT'S NOW A HABIT
7.   YOU DO IT EVETY OTHER DAY
8.   YOU NEVER MISS THAT DAY
9.   YOUR NOW HOOKED
10. IT'S NOW EVERYDAY
11. IT'S NOW TWICE A DAY
12. YOUR ADDICTED
13. WHAT WILL YOU DO
DC raw love Mar 2015
A broken heart can only be fixed with crazy glue
DC raw love Oct 2016
Temptation....
Sensation....
Manipulation....
Frustration...
Rese­rvation...
Preparation...
Devastation....
Eratacation....
Populat­ion....
DC raw love Feb 2015
Memories  on the wall
falling of the wagon of ****

the faster i run
the faster it comes

scary is on the wall
i don't want to take that fall

i need to find a place to
pass it over

no other place
makes me feel so jaded

crosses on the surface
on my spoons

black is all i feel
is that what it means to be free

degradation is what i bring to myself
to feel that unwanted love flow

i am only beside myself
trading feeling with myself

flowing in though my veins
makes me real

can i ever be free

from those crosses
on the surface of my spoon
DC raw love Jan 2015
I love to read poetry in motion
I love to read poems that flow

But I'm caught in this crossfire
Because I must write about my life
DC raw love Dec 2014
When you hit a crossroad in life
Do you take the easy way or hard way

This is one of life's challenges

The easy, is simple, same old life
The hard way ????

What can one say, me
I may be different
I live for different and change

Are you one of those people
That don't like to be let down

Some let downs build character
That can only make you stronger

You never know
That one chance you take
Can make your life
DC raw love Mar 2015
He finds himself on his 6th birthday
Shaken in a darkened corner
Hoping for a small sign of anything
A sound of a key jiggling the hasp lock
Wondering if this is his punishment or hell
Looking for a passage to another life
Darkness seems to reign over his life
He constantly cry's out "why" to no one
Which echos in his head endlessly
He try's to gather his fears to deal with them
His fears become his never ending thoughts
Could his fears be his fear
Stuck in this dark corner
Which holds him like a magnet
Learning his worst fear
Dark Corners and locked doors
Which was his daily punishment as a child

Older in life I sometimes find him crying in a corner
With the door closed and the light off
Only to know of his fear
Which still traps him to this day
He is now 45

He was punished for not blowing out all the candles
These things happen to many
I could tell you stories that
you would not believe
me, all I got was a leather belt
or willow tree branch
DC raw love Feb 2015
Welcome to your life
There's no turning back

Even while you sleep
It will find you

Acting on your best behavior
Turn your back on mother nature

It's your own design
It's your own remorse
It's your own decisions

Only you make the most

There's a room,
where the light won't find you

Holding on to the walls,
while they tumble down on you

So glad you almost made it
So sad you had to fake it

Can't you stand your indecision
Living with a lack of vision

You say you never need it
One a headline, why believe it

All your freedom for your pleasure
Nothing ever lasts forever

Cruelty of  this world
Is what you make it
DC raw love Dec 2014
Smile like the sun
Yet kiss my pouring rain

Why do you follow me
It will only crush you

You're fondness heart
You're fondness ways

Only makes me
Lead your ways

Follow me you will
You're always there

Please don't stare
I'm not yours to bare

I don't want to hurt you
But you followed me

Not I to you
DC raw love Mar 2015
The road traveled to you is a hard one
Covered in shattered glass from your past
I have already been cut and bleed for you
For I am only a shadow that follows
DC raw love Jun 2015
The mind of a crushed  heart
leads a wicked trail of hurt

Things are misinterpreted
sometimes for good reason

The mind begins to play trick on one
The stomach hurts with pain

The one we loved has betrayed us
Betrayal is so hard to swallow for most

The mind constantly thinks of  the hurt and why
What did I do so wrong to deserve this we say

We fell nothing but self pity with out knowing
No one has an answer we want to hear
We become self seeking without knowing

Yes it hurts so bad and I have too have been crushed
It lead me down a road that I am not happy with

My wall was so tall no one could get through it
Now my wall is down and I am letting some in
DC raw love Dec 2014
When I cry, I will wonder why
When I hurt, it feels like the first

When in pain, I feel nothing but shame
When I lie, I want to sometimes die

But when I smile, I feel so loved
And the tears I cry or tears of joy

Now when there's pain you feel inside
I will be with you right by your side

Now if you hurt, I will hurt with you
Just until the hurt is fulfilled for two

Now the part of lies, should never be
Be honest and open as we can
Only try to be
DC raw love Mar 2015
This darkness I must leave behind and find the light
But i am frighten to not know what i might find
I try so hard not up get upset and to find this new life

Looking into the future to find a life that I recognize
Being empty in the past does not tell me what tomorrow brings
As I only cry for yesterday and tomorrow i will learn to survey
DC raw love Jan 2015
I used to like to walk the straight and narrow line
I used to think that everything was fine

Sometimes I'd like to sit and gaze for days through sleepless dreams
All alone and trapped in time

I wonder what tomorrow has in mind for me
Or am I even in it's mind at all

Perhaps I'll get a chance to look ahead and see
Soon as I find myself a crystal ball


Tell me, tell me where I'm going
I don't know where I've been

Tell me, tell me, won't you tell me
And then tell me again

My heart is breaking, my body's aching
And I don't know where to go

Tell me, tell me, won't you tell me
I've just got to know


There's so many things I need to know
There's so many things I've got to know

If you should see me walking
Through your dreams at night

Would you please direct me
Where I ought to be

I've been looking for a crystal ball
To shed the light

To find a future in me...
I need my crystal ball
styx
DC raw love Mar 2015
As i try to grow my state of mind
I feel like a endless tasteless vine

As i try to bare sweet tasting fruits
My heart is soured by the roots

As my soil has been cultivated
realizing that i have been regenerated

As i try to produce sweet loving fruits
It has all been spoiled from my roots
DC raw love Nov 2014
a prisoner of night
with dreams of suclusion
as the day is long
the night is day

no reason for life
no reason for death
as i lie awake
spinning in my head

no place to go
no place to run
no one to hear
with nothing but tears

with only tears
to face my fears
why can't i think
why can't i run

is this life
or is this death
can i figure this out
or
should I blow off my head

I have these problems
why can't i face life instead
why am i scared
why don't i scream
one day i feel
i should be rid of these dreams

i cut myself
to reliese my pain
only yo know
i'm cutting my stains

can i ever change
or
will i ever will
only to remember
i'm up to a 100 stains

is there a GOD
or
is it a conterfit thing
why do i do
all these bad things
DC raw love Apr 2015
To live
is your life

To grow
is your fight

To feel
is to know

To want
is your need

To love
is to hurt

To cry
is to bleed

To die
is the end
DC raw love Nov 2014
I saw the drugs and the damage done.
Their so young and their life has just begun.
They do what they do, not even thinking why.
All they want to do, is just get high.
It's all fun and games, until you get hooked.
I wish this on no one, from my experience.
You have to face life, but you don't even try.
All you want to do, is just get high.
I stop and stare, it's because I care.
I tell you what I know and you don't even care.
I try to tell you hope and you better beware.
One day you'll be alone and you should of cared.
Remember I was young and I was once there.
DC raw love Feb 2015
he fronted his happiness
as he hurt inside

he hid his tears
with a smile

when was in pain
he would laugh

he hid under his pillow
for days on end

he would sneak, early in the morning,
to eat, fearful of others
yet he lived alone

he shot his father
20 years ago
and his father forgave him

loved ones would tell him
your very much loved

this man was my best friend
he was a true genius

honestly, he was not far
behind Gates and Jobs

he tried killing himself
multable times

he started to see a shrink
and the day came

he was sitting, waiting, ontime
an hour had past

so he decided to go for a walk
an deliberately walk in front of a
fully loaded dump truck

to end his paim
that he could not overcome
he was my very good friend
DC raw love Dec 2014
As i sit here with darkness, fading in and out of my head.
I feel like i'm sitting here with a gun to my head.

Is it fear that has me or do I have fear.
I've shaved my firing pin, because I'm just not sure.

With tears running down my face, with no one to see me.
If the gun then works, i will know for sure.

I write this note, can someone please help me.
let me clarify, i wrote this for a friend that took his life, i'm very well, thank you guys for your concerns. I'm not going to take my life. David
DC raw love Apr 2015
Can you see when I was a child
Can you see what goes on inside my mind

Is there a reason, is there enough time
I can only dare, to roll back the days

When you tell a lie, I know it was mine
Riding on this high, I fall to the ground

Feeling like I was shot in the head
Everything before my eyes, turns to red

I don't care to ask the question, why
Only feeling, like I am back from the dead

I can now only pretend to be, who I am not
Just give me a reason, to shake your hand

I can capture you, with a smile
As I look deep into your eyes

I will not speak, my tongue has been cut
As my ears listen for the next lie

The truth only seems to confuse me
I have never known the words of sincerity

The true meanings of words such as

I Love you
Yes dear
I care
Are you ok


I don't quite understand
because they have never been spoken to me

I am trying to figure this out
As I look inside of my trembling head
Only to find nothing new in my flesh

Wanting a new life that I can hopefully understand
I try to purge my mind any way possible

I've tried drugs, alcohol, and thought of hurting myself
Nothing seems to work and one day I felt it

Tears from above, as I spoke about my past
It was my life rewinding in my head

I played it through to the end and watched it
Over and over and over again
and edited every bad part in my life

Finding where I went wrong if life
We cut those parts out of my past

My outlook on life has know changed
It is no longer about me, how selfish I was

My eye's are know clear
My ear's now listen
I can know speak the truth

And most importantly i understand
**Sincerity
DC raw love Jan 2015
With one step
With one blow

Life vanishes before your eyes
Life is now seen from a distance

Many miles away
From the skies
Across the Milky-Way

Another life has ended
Like shiny little rain drops
To some place we all will know

Is it a place of darkness
Is it a place of brightness
or
Is it a place that is unknown
DC raw love Jan 2015
a death of a strager in sight
usually leads to curiosity

sometimes death on the news
is ignored or leaves us in awwww

death of a friend
we sometimes feel different

but a death of a loved one
is full of pain

i sit back and think that god wants no grief
yes, there is time of mourniing to make death complete

now if you come to my home town
which is new orleans

when someone diess, we dance in the street
we carry their coffin to a jazz beat
we throw in some blues for the few that cry

but we all know threre's a party in the sky
DC raw love Nov 2014
we always think
death is unfair
it's time of grieving
full of sorrow
times of darkness
with no tomorrow

never eating
always crying
trying to  be strong
is only wrong

it should always be love
from the times that we shared
she's in a better place
and i will always care

this will take time
i have been there
i lost my mother
and she always cared

I sometimes don't show it
but i'v always cared
she was my mother
and she'll always be there
DC raw love Jun 2015
Deceiving eyes can tell a tale
About life that can be so frail

These eyes they can see in you,
to hide your lie's, through their eyes

Yet these **** eyes can catch your life
of one who is deep, one to be sold

The lies that can tell, to make things right
Can makes life thin, to keep things right

You say you’ll tell no one
But only one person knows

The things that ya’ll know
Is something ya’ll hold

Your deceiving eyes tell so many tales
of a mysterious life, of curious ways
DC raw love Dec 2014
Deceiving eyes they tell a tale

Of something they hide
Of something to sell

The lies you tell, to make things right
Makes life thin and nothing seems right

The lies you told and the lies you’ll tell
You must come clean and make it right

You say you’ll tell no one
But one person knows

The things that ya’ll know
Is something ya’ll hold

Your deceiving eyes tell so many lies
So keep up your ways and continue your lies
DC raw love Dec 2014
signs of deception
without even thinking

it's always done
with manipulation

something you want
you sometimes take

only to cry
if you don't get your way

never thinking
or
wondering why

you want you want
and
you don't even care

never the right choices
but you always swear

is it because you don't know
or
you were never taught better

did any care
maybe they were scared

take what you will
you would if you coud

i hope you can change
and
i wish that you could
DC raw love Jan 2015
When were mislead
from our conscience

Who's to blame
Our heart or mind

Is our decisions made
from our past or what's to be

Decisions,
contemplations, rationalizations
Good vs bad the pro's and con's

So many way's to decide

Do you pray
Do you cry
Do you ask someone

All I can say is its your decision
If your not sure, it's easy

Just put it in God's hands
DC raw love Mar 2015
Deep into thought
About the moment

I then drift to the past
Of a life of love
Of a life of hurt

My mind then tumbles to the past
To the shame I may have caused
along with sorrow & grief

to the past
when I was a child
when life was fun
when we knew no sorrow or doubt

to the past
to my family who I did not understand
to how things have changed in society

I then catch my thoughts of the day
and now ponder on the future
DC raw love Mar 2015
I now live deep within a cold hole
which I dug through the travesties of my life
I can  now only look in one direction
Which is up, do to my narrow life
I can scream but no one can hear me
My voice can only travel so far, my hole is deep
I can no longer climb, my fingers now nubs
From pointing out everyone else's problems
My own thought process, is who I blame
Again, I find myself not accepting the situation
Is there any getting out or is it just to deep
God will no longer listens from what I am told
My heart saddens because I am close to only one
The one I do not want to accept, who smiles lightly
I can only seek an angel of hope, I hear they have wings
Can one actually flutter down my hole and lift me

Again I will try
I hear an angel will only come through prayer
I have heard of prayer
Yet, I do not know how to pray

I pray,
God help me
Send me someone with wings
Your angel
Send two
My burdens are heavy

AMEN
DC raw love Mar 2015
Don't ask me to remember
Don't ask me to understand
Let me rest and know your with me
Kiss my cheek and hold my hand
I'm confused beyond your concept
I'm sad, i'm sick and I'm lost
Do not lose your patience with me
Do not scold or curse my crying
I can't help the way I'm acting
I can't be different though I try
I don't mean to get lost
I'm sorry I can't always remember you
Just remember I need you
The best of me is gone
Please don't fail to stand by me
I was once like you
I've always loved you, so love me please
DC raw love Nov 2014
inflation of depression
what a sensation
the lowest of lows
with no place to go
not thinking whats right
we begin to fight
we try to get out
it's no where in sight
not knowing what to do
it's all up to you
never thinking
full of fear
I have no reason
don't want to be here
I hear about love
what a crock of ****
only to remember
I feel something dear
i feel myself changing
to understand why
this word of love
i'll give it a try
i truely found my reason
my reaso why
only to remember
LOVE and GOD
DC raw love Mar 2015
Like a dog without a bone
Like a man without a home
Like a child that's all alone

The feelings of
Desperation
are different

They can make you
Search
Strive
and
Cry
DC raw love Jan 2015
ALWAY REMEMBER THAT LIFE
IS A ONE WAY STREET
AND THERE'S NO TURNING BACK

KEEP YOUR HEART IN DRIVE
AND YOU WILL GET TO YOUR

DESTINATION
DC raw love Dec 2014
My journey from,
somewhere to nowhere.

With nothing beneith my feet.
As the journey ends,
within my head.

My feelings of solitude
are gone from my head.

As light leads me
from my destiny within.

My eyes have finnaly opened
and my dreams now begin.

With my past as my guide
and my feelings within.

My heart has now taken over
as my true life begins.
DC raw love Dec 2014
My journey from somewhere to nowhere.
With nothing beneith my feet.

As the journey ends, within my head.
My feelings of solitude are gone from my head.

As light leads me from my destiny within.
My eyes have finnaly opened and my dreams now begin.

With my past as my guide, from my feelings within.
My heart has now taken over, as my true life begins.
DC raw love Jan 2015
Destiny?
How does one know their destiny

Is it something we think or Dream
Is it a goal or a challenge

Or does our destiny change everyday

We always sometimes say,

This is my destiny,
to be poor
to be rich
to be famous
to be loved

Destiny?

We all reach our destiny

The inevitable or necessary fate
to which a particular person or thing is destined

A predetermined course of events
considered as something beyond human power or control

The power of thought to predetermine events

Your destiny is now

The past is gone
and the future is not here

Your destiny will change always
DC raw love Nov 2014
My journey from,
somewhere to nowhere.
With nothing beneith my feet.
As the journey ends,
within my head.
My feelings of solitude
are gone from my head.
As light leads me
from my destiny within.
My eyes have finnaly opened
and my dreams now begin.
With my past as my guide
and my feelings within.
My heart has now taken over
as my true life begins.
DC raw love Jul 2015
Does she want love....
Does she want a friend...
Does she want things to end...
A hint....
A whisper...
A blink of the eye....

Is she happy?
Is she shy?

Does she feel, she wants to cry?
Could she live, in a little white lie?

Is it fun and games.....
Is it truth or dare....

Could it simply be life beware.....

Feelings that grow.......
Feelings that die......

Feelings of excitement....
Feelings we dread.......

Truth be known, is all I know......
Loving another, is how I glow.....

Stay real to your life.....
Stay true to your thoughts......

The past holds the past.....
The future we can't predict....

Yet, can somewhat control......

Find that one dream.....
Find that one vision....

It is only one's mind,
that controls their decisions.....

So always remember.....

Jack be nimble....
Jack be quick......

How one's mind,
can play those tricks!
DC raw love Dec 2014
as we grow, is our destiny over
do we become relaxed in our ways
will our life now always be the same

is it you just don't want to look behind
or never look ahead

do you ever feel that you want to be different
to change your ways to something new

it could be an adveture
of something you never knew

destiny is not the past but the future
look at your life and play a new part

the part of a new life you want
of destinty thats in your heart

Filled with mystries of your thoughts
DC raw love Apr 2015
I have traveled from my home
to a place I thought could be my own

I now feel trapped in the grips of time
I now struggle to find my way in time

I  sleep to catch a break
only to be waken by reality

I try to fight another day
caught in same old ****** routine

I can only find peace
when I hear no voices

I sometimes feel like a child
that can't find his way

I don't like to hear people
tell me what is best for me

****, they don't even know me
Is their meaning real or condescending

I seem to misinterpret things
from time to time with uncertainties

I try not to lose it, feeling like a servant
to my own ****** up thoughts

I try to stop this self creation of self pity
That can only lead me to sin

I must break this mind set
and clear my head

or die before I wake instead
DC raw love Mar 2015
Two words
Two different meanings
But they are often used wrongly

Dignity and Pride
If you truly do not understand them
They only can get you in trouble

Ways of earning true respect

It's not about the way you dress
It's not about what you have

That's called surreal
Big on the outside, phony on the inside

Gaining respect is about what you do for others
If you can build something, a family, a business, a community
And show everyone respect on the way

Respect is returned and you will be known
You will be a dignified individual
and people will be proud to know you

That is my definition
of
Dignity and Pride
Have confidence in one's self
DC raw love Dec 2014
what does it take
to make people think

most people live for ***** laundry
things to ponder on and worry

worry for what i say

no direction, no control
if you have no direction
you have no control

direction for life
direction to be free
direction for drive

to the place you want to be

we can't fix the past
but we can fix the future

a future with love
a future with honor
DC raw love Nov 2014
Disasters in life
What a scary thought
The destruction of things
Including life

We struggle and fight
To set our minds Right

Disaster

Disasters in life
Life changing experiences
We sometimes don't know
If we want to be free

Disaster

Disasters of Mother Nature
A good and bad thing
It kills our eye sight
But brings new things

Disaster

Disaster is it a good thing
We learn from experience
We learn how to be
We learn to help other's
To set people free
DC raw love Mar 2015
So many faces
How many were a disguise
To hide the hurt
DC raw love Feb 2015
like a empty sea shell
she was  so beautiful

looking down on herself
not understanding her ways

always putting herself down
then crying trying to understand why
and then not knows why she cries

while three always discuss
directing her final decisions

split personalities
fight daily
love daily
hurt daily

she can never figure things out
yet hold a relationship

but how gorgeous she is

how unhappy she is
how vibrant she is
how lonely she is

one wants to fight
one wants to stay
one wants to leave

never knowing
what she will do next

she hides from everyone
yet she is never alone
It is now acknowledged that these dissociated states are not fully mature personalities, but rather they represent a disjointed sense of identity. With the amnesia typically associated with dissociative identity disorder, different identity states remember different aspects of autobiographical information. There is usually a "host" personality within the individual, who identifies with the person's real name. Ironically, the host personality is usually unaware of the presence of other personalities.
DC raw love Jan 2015
Distractions should not change one's focus in life.

Yes one's moods may change but that's emotions

Emotions that make you cry, hurt, laugh and sigh

Emotions that sometimes causes pain.
Pain that really hurts within. It causes sorry, grief, depression and death.

Life

Life is somewhat strange from time to time.

Things will always change to the better and to the worst

How can one deal with this.
It only comes one way

With life experience and God
DC raw love Dec 2014
Does what I say, really matter

You sometimes say that i'm a bother

If you only knew and you never will

This game you call love

Is were you get your thrills

It's never about us

It's always about you

it's a ****** up thing

when it's not about us

will you ever learn better

i want you to see

i wish you no harm

but you can't harm me

*******
DC raw love Mar 2015
I walk the streets of Japan till I get lost
Cause it doesn't remind me of anything

Getting a graveyard tan carrying a cross
Cause it doesn't remind me of anything

I like studying faces in a parking lot
Cause it doesn't remind me of anything

I like driving backwards in the fog
Cause it doesn't remind me of anything

I like gypsy moths and radio talk
Cause it doesn't remind me of anything

I like gospel music and canned applause
Cause it doesn't remind me of anything

I like colorful clothing in the sun
Cause it doesn't remind me of anything

I like hammering nails and speaking in tongues
Cause it doesn't remind me of anything

I like throwing my voice and breaking guitars
Cause it doesn't remind me of anything

I like playing in the sand what's mine is ours
If it doesn't remind me of anything

Bend and shape me
I love the way you are

Slow and sweetly
Like never before

Calm and sleeping
We won't stir up the past

So descretely
We won't look back

The things that I've loved the things that I've lost
The things I've held sacred that I've dropped

I won't lie no more you can bet
I don't want to learn what I'll need
Audio
DC raw love Dec 2014
do you ever stop
like the pouring rain

does it ever feel right
without feeling shame

does it ever hurt
like the blood that you bleed

do you ever cry
like the pouring rain

does it ever stop
these things of pain

does it ever hurt
when you pass the blame

do you ever stop
your confusing ways

does it ever stop
these games we play

does it ever hurt
when you die inside

will it ever stop
these feelings inside

if they can’t
I want to die
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