If I  could only get into your head
Not to control it, but to venture
What would I find, what would I see

Would I have to push away the cob webs
Would their be many unanswered questions
Would it be a safe journey

Would I find love or hate
Would I find pain or joy
Would I find hurt or happiness

How does one's mine actually turn
Does one push to the future or dwell in the past
Does one have an intelligent mind or is one labeled

The are two main types of personalities
Extroverts who are outspoken,
Introverts who are not.

Each has their pro's and con's
What's inside of your head

I often wonder how i have come to be.....
I often wonder how i travel through to see.....

This atmosphere that i live in, I cannot see...... Everytime I breathe my feelings change within me....

This flesh that i live in, i cannot control it's growth... So how can I be expected to control my mind......

I am influenced and brain washed by whats around me..... Please do not judge me for my actions, I know no difference......

Everytime my surroundings are replaced to something new....... I have to learn a new set of rules and adapt to it's culture......

I want to like change, but sometimes it is difficult for me...... As I become embellished with the change I then change......

I am often guided in my directions losing my main focus..... Only wanting to pull into my shell where I can find no answers.....

I drift aimlessly though my mind to try and discover my real purpose...... Only to be confused and excited, which leaves me bewildered.......

I have found my direction many times only to find myself distracted..... As I go though life I have learned many things, only not who I am......

My comfort level changes with every step I take.... My emotions change with every breathe I take.....

But in this life,
I must respect the wishes of my mind that is mine.....

Can you see when I was a child
Can you see what goes on inside my mind

Is there a reason, is there enough time
I can only dare, to roll back the days

When you tell a lie, I know it was mine
Riding on this high, I fall to the ground

Feeling like I was shot in the head
Everything before my eyes, turns to red

I don't care to ask the question, why
Only feeling, like I am back from the dead

I can now only pretend to be, who I am not
Just give me a reason, to shake your hand

I can capture you, with a smile
As I look deep into your eyes

I will not speak, my tongue has been cut
As my ears listen for the next lie

The truth only seems to confuse me
I have never known the words of sincerity

The true meanings of words such as

I Love you
Yes dear
I care
Are you ok

I don't quite understand
because they have never been spoken to me

I am trying to figure this out
As I look inside of my trembling head
Only to find nothing new in my flesh

Wanting a new life that I can hopefully understand
I try to purge my mind any way possible

I've tried drugs, alcohol, and thought of hurting myself
Nothing seems to work and one day I felt it

Tears from above, as I spoke about my past
It was my life rewinding in my head

I played it through to the end and watched it
Over and over and over again
and edited every bad part in my life

Finding where I went wrong if life
We cut those parts out of my past

My outlook on life has know changed
It is no longer about me, how selfish I was

My eye's are know clear
My ear's now listen
I can know speak the truth

And most importantly i understand
**Sincerity

What really makes a person

Some say it was what one has been through
Some say it is what one knows, schooling
Some say you have to experience certain things

Is it really what one has been through that makes them

Yes, I had my heart broke and yes it hurt
Yes, someone close to died and yes it hurt
Yes, I had money and toys and yes I was happy
Yes, I was in love before and yes I was happy

But you know what
I didn't have a ******* clue who I was

Right now I am a little sickened with tears in my eyes

This weekend I traveled 4 hours to Houston
Pretty town on the outside, ***** on the inside

I went to feed the homeless with people from New Orleans
that I didn't even know, and they were from a different ethnic

Me I love all people, we brought food and clothes for the homeless
Set it up in a closed park and they came in the groves

I talked and listen to testimony after testimony and really listened
I listen to hurt like no other hurt and they were so thankful
they wanted to express feelings to someone about what was going on

The police arrest them and the city won't help them. They say they do but they don't.

I have seen homeless, yet some of the people with me were shocked

The police eventually came and did not have the heart to throw us out.
They said they did want to help, but city all says get rid of them.
I heard it straight out of the mouth of the police

1.   If you have a question ask it.
2.   No question is a dumb question
3.   No is a complete sentence, no explanation required.
4.   If you have something on your mind, just say it.
5.   You cannot control what another one thinks, so don't worry about.
6.   Always be truthful and honest.
7.   Set goals and follow your dream.
8.   Never complain and never make excuses,
9.   Stay true to yourself and others
10. Show respect, love and care.
11. Think before you speak.

Life is defiantly a journey with ups and downs and keep pushing for what you want out of life.

It is not necessarily how you get there, just as long as you get there!

To the ones who love, to the ones who care
My hat is off to you, along with my respect

So many people lose track of what life is really about

If you are in a bind with problems
It is because you put yourself their

A problem is only a problem it you let it be
It was once a circumstance that you did not deal with

Life is hard enough on it's own, be responsible
Love and Care, you will then have things come to you

ONE DAY SOMEONE WILL WAKE UP AND REALIZE WHAT YOU TAKE FOR GRANTED. ....AND REMOVE IT...THEN WHATS LEFT IS UP TO YOU

Friends are not forever.
Whoever said that lied.

When you stop helping friends and start helping yourself you become the enemy. A true friend will help you become successful.

The wrong friend will give you the pistol and watch you sink yourself.
Wake up friends and understand you are not the only one with problems.

You cant help somebody when you need help yourself.
Before you get mad at a friend for not helping you.

Ask yourself what can you do to help yourself.
We all have dreams and ambitions so what makes yours more important.

Stop expecting people to put their life on hold to get yours straight.
Get your own house clean before you try to clean another...

Have a Blessed Day..

All my life I have been living on my own
Living well and yes having a few problems

I have always lived, knowing who God was
But never making him part of my life

As I have grown older
I have finally decided to start hanging out with him
He guides in a way that I have never expected

It is so cool, he is nothing like people portray him to be
He actually a really cool dude and we talk often

He differently knows how to have a good time
Some people want to meet my new friend, some don't

He tell's me Dave no big deal, I still got their back
He is such a good and loving man and ask nothing from me
Except to show real love and to help others

He has guided me in a way that you cannot believe
I still do a lot of the not so good things that I do
and he always forgives me

He is now my best friend and he has surrounded me with so many good people and has opened up many doors for me

Doors to success, wealth and gave me meaning

Sometimes I don't like people.
Sometimes I just don't want to talk.
Sometimes I just want to observe.
Sometimes I like my little bubble.
Sometimes the loneliness makes me feel like I'm about to burst.
Sometimes (ok... MOST times) I don't like people within arm's length of me.
Sometimes I be like "**** Love".
Sometimes I wanna Love so hard like I don't give a ****.
Sometimes (Ok. Ok. MOST times!) I'm not "appropriate".
(Most times, I don't care to be.)
Sometimes I don't feel like being funny.
Sometimes I don't want to entertain.
Sometimes I disappear.
Sometimes I don't want to be invisible.
Sometimes I feel like an outsider.
Sometimes I feel like I'm on the edge.
Sometimes I want to jump.
Most times, I would rather fly.

I feel that love is somewhat over rated at times
I hope that it can only get better as i grow older
I feel that it should, but I don't usually count on it

I don't always seem to understand what I do
Even though I've done it many, many times before  
Love always seems to feel somewhat strange

When I fall in love, it can make me feel uncomfortable
When I fall out of love, I feel the same way, why
I just can't quite seem to figure out these feelings

I just hope I can find that one girl, that one fine jewel
Something I never ever want to let go of and to cherish
That one girl that can remove these feeling of uncertainties

I hope that one day my feet can firmly footed in this life
I hope that one day I rise above my feelings of uncertainties
I hope that one day I overcome the feelings of love being overrated

If I had a dollar
for everytime she hollered
I could be a millionaire

If I had a stitch
for everytime she *******
I could mend everyones clothes

If I had a bread crumb
for everytime she cried
I could lead a path to paradise

If I hand a grand of sand
for everytime she lost control
I would have a hour glass with unlimited time

If I had a chair
for everytime she cared
I would have no place to sit

If I had to walk a mile
for everytime she smiled
I would never go anywhere

If I had a perk
For everytime she hurt
It would never run out of benefits

and so on
and so on
and so on

The poppie plant blooms to the most beautiful flowers. It is called the Flower of Joy, the colors, the tranquility and how they can absorb you is one of a kind. And when they cut the bulb before it blooms, it bleeds *****.

In the Wizard of OZ, the field to the castle of OZ, was a Poppie field. Where, Dorothy, The Tin Man, The Cowardly Lion, The Scarecrow and Toto, caught a nap.

Alexander the Great used this flower to conquer the world. He gave it to his army to quite the hurting and to help and motivate the fighters from the pain of fighting.

Great Briton used it to control and suppress China and to make money to grow their kingdom.

It was then turned into Morphine and ****** in the late 1800's, legalized and taxed. It came in many forms of elixirs and then turned into big business. It could actually be purchased out of a Sears and Roebuck Catalog, where you could purchase it and get it in the mail. They could get their daily usage along with a syringe for a mere $1.95.

It was one thing of a few things that brought ****** to his knees when they cut the ***** supply to Germany. That stop his drug making for his soldiers that left them useless. His scientist then he invented methadone but it was to late.

In Afghanistan where the majority of ***** is produce, our army has only cut down a few of the poppie fields, only to know it will make it's way to the US. What could be their reason and motivation. Is it to help each economy though blood money.  

In today's world it is controlled by War Lord in the east, the south, and the orient, shipped to many different countries  in many unusually ways. Yet some of it to be purchased by large pharmaceutical companies.  

This innocent beautiful flower, that brings only joy to the eyes has been misused by man since 3400BC believe it or not. The death that it has left behind is uncapable of being calculated.

I sometimes converse with myself
only to get lost in the conversation

I sometimes converse with myself
only to realize that I am babbling

I sometimes converse with myself
only to get bewildered by what I say

I sometimes converse with myself
To try to figure out what I am doing

I sometimes converse with myself
To thank my lucky stars

I sometimes converse with myself
To thank God for helping me though hard times

I sometimes converse with myself
To figure out how am I still alive

Do you sometimes feel the harder you try
The less you get accomplished on task at hand

Yes it sounds like a cliche that's because it is
It something that holds very true in life

Please realize you may not get what your working for right away
But yet you are doing something very important for yourself

Educating your self on something you want and
laying the ground work for what the future holds for you

Let me tell you, things don't really come fast in this world
It takes work, discipline, drive, and a little bit of attitude

You will soon see your goal in reach in due time
as long as you try and never give up, time consuming yes

I will tell you a little secret you may already know
You have built character in yourself and now you are ready

To follow up on your goal if you have not accomplished it already
Stay true to your goals and you will stay true to your self

I have weather so many storms in my life and
I can only pray that the last was the last and
hope the future holds calmer weather for me

Storms seem to **** the emotions out of me
And leaves me fragile in every step I take
I try not to look back but I always do

Never knowing what the outcome will bring or
How it will effect my life that lies ahead of me
I sometimes don't think of others, which is selfish

Storms of my life have been very strong, hurtful and painful
Some have hurt and brought tears to my eyes wanting forgiveness
Some have just totally ****** me up and left me confused

I think back on how things should have been handled
Could I have done anything different, like maybe prepare
How can one prepare for the unkown without knowing

Can I see a pretty day turn gray and then run away
I cannot predict my storms in my life nor the outcome
All I can do is curl up and pray that I have hurt no one

I have traveled from my home
to a place I thought could be my own

I now feel trapped in the grips of time
I now struggle to find my way in time

I  sleep to catch a break
only to be waken by reality

I try to fight another day
caught in same old ****** routine

I can only find peace
when I hear no voices

I sometimes feel like a child
that can't find his way

I don't like to hear people
tell me what is best for me

****, they don't even know me
Is their meaning real or condescending

I seem to misinterpret things
from time to time with uncertainties

I try not to lose it, feeling like a servant
to my own ****** up thoughts

I try to stop this self creation of self pity
That can only lead me to sin

I must break this mind set
and clear my head

or die before I wake instead

a love for life
is full of meaning

a life of hatred
has no meaning

the blood we shed
the tears we cry

a life long adventure
for one reason why

why don't they care
why don't they face life

no reason at all
but only doubt

why don't they try
why are they mad

they have no reason
so i don't want them sad

one day they'll know
i was only teaching

in different ways
for all the right reasons

they'll eventually learn
the ways of life

the reason i do this
is i want them strong

strong for feelings
strong for life

it's their beginning
they should know life

Just like cherry pie
she catches my eye

With a extra cherry on top
what more can I ask for

So sweet, so dreamy
So pretty, so creamy

Can't wait to eat it
Hope no one steals it

So ****** and classy this cherry pie
only to go a glass of Don Perignon

My love for this cheery pie
Has my head in the sky

How do I want it
How do I need it

I think I'll take it home
and eat it, one bite at a time

My Cherry Pie

It the world was on fire
no one could save me but you

What strange desires
Will make foolish people do

I never dreamed that
I'd meet somebody like you

What a wicked game to play
To make me feel this way

What a wicked thing to do
To let me dream of you

What a wicked thing to say
That you never felt this way

What a wicked thing to do,
To make me fall in love with you

The day you left for your space
The tears I cried that filled my eyes

Counting the hours each and everyday
Making myself sick in everyway

I wish I could sleep, my life away
Why did this day, have to end this way

I never thought that the night
Would hold me in such freight

If I could only see pass the dark
Or just close my eye's from the start

To feel the fear of you not being here
Not knowing the answers of why your not here

I will pull my eyes out, hold my breath
and wait until I shake, to hear an answer

If I had some faith, I could make it safe
If I was only sure, your love is pure

can I dream, just one dream
can I get past this broken road

this broken road
that I travel for so long

which I try have tried to fix
so many times

my shoes are worn
from the lies of my life

my emotions stolen
from the selfishness of others

I stumble in my footsteps
walking through the nails

my life is now torn
which has been ripped by other

can someone tell me
is there  something I don't know

can someone tell me
is there something I must know

can someone tell me
is there something I can do

I feel my time is due
to get past this broken road

How many times a day do people  love
How many times a day do people  hate

How many times a day do people smile
How many times a day do people hurt

How many times a day do people laugh
How many times a day do people cry

How many times a day do people help
How many times a day do people rage

How many times a day do people smile
How many times a day do people hurt

How many times a day do people give
How many times a day do people take

How many times a day do people live
How many times a day do people die

**Love
         Hate
                   Smile
                             Hurt
                                      Laugh
                                                   Cry
                                                            Help
                                                                       Rage
                                                                                  Give
                                                                                            Take
                                                                                                      Live
                                                                                                                Die

To live
is your life

To grow
is your fight

To feel
is to know

To want
is your need

To love
is to hurt

To cry
is to bleed

To die
is the end

How many times,
can they fill me with lies

And I listen again,
while they twist the truth.

They play around with my head,
The things they will do and the things they will say.

But they don't really understand.
Tears fill my eyes when I hear all the lies.

Just leave me alone,
I don't want your promises anymore.

Looking through eyes of time,
mirrors reflecting their stories untrue.

Promises, promises,
telling me all of my glories overdue.

How many times have I heard it before,
and I'll probably hear it again.

King of a thousand knights,
pawn in a table light, losing to you.

And they don't really know even,
what they're talking about.

Even the stories that they tell me,
in times of confession are not true.

Outcome is obvious for them,
none for us, just meaningless lies.

The things they will do,
and the things they will say.

When they don't really understand,
The fear of rejection.

I don't need their protection,
I'm making a stand.

Please tell me baby
Do you feel the way I do

Hey wont you tell me
What can I do for you

I'll come to you any waken hour
When a minute feels like a lifetime

Sitting all alone looking at the clock
Watching the hands tick away

Slipping into a daze
Why do I feel this way

Please tell me baby
What your looking for

Feels like a lifetime
Trying to find my way

Trying find you Baby
Why do I feel this way

I'll sing a song for you
If I can inch closer to you

Baby you take my heart away
Every time I slip into a daze

Why do I feel this way
There was a time I can hold on

I can no longer hang on
Slipping into a daze

Everyday, everything seems the same
Everyday, nothing seems to change

Everyday, I try to make a change
Everyday, I feel I'm going insane

Everyday, I try to take a break
Everyday, I always make mistakes

Everyday, I cry the same old tears
Everyday, I add time on to my years

Everyday, I feel the same each day
Everyday, it eats my heart away