I paused to stare
across
-the void of emptiness
where I have tossed
so many promises that I
have made
all the memories and people
that time will fade
then the fog always seems
to appear
obscuring all there
that were just here
pushing me to move along
telling me that I was
some how wrong
To even give the past a chance  even taking a single glance and what do I do
I'll let life intervene
rise up and come between
start slowly shrinking
to suddenly disappear
and then I walk on past
the empty
shadow that I cast
if I could I separate myself
from all those memory traps
Where I always seem to fall
I find that I cannot help myself  always I seem to pause
to peer across the distance void where I've always lied decried  , as, as full of emptyness
when I truly knew
exactly what it is that I see
every single one of those
scattered memories
Like  mausoleums
inviting me to come on In ,,
While inside my head
Voices telling me to move on
before I release some  inner peace
Soothing out all the inner pain and ever-present nerve
  So away I go to avoid
Any  piece of mind
I don't believe I yet deserve.

Allow me to be
T.he one
Who helps you
Set yourself  free
Removing all those chains
That had  been  for so long
weighing you down
Wipe away those stains
Set you back on your road again
So  that  THAT.....familiar ground
WILL hopefully
remind you
where...it was
     ...once you were bound

Then if you need...someone
to walk along beside you
For a moment a minute or a day
Well that would be me
and if you need somebody
To walk farther up ahead
Even behind
That would be okay
I dont mind ..really
Im here for you ...  
        ...not me.

erosion-corrosion
or one big explosion
look them over and choose
the Earths just a rental
don't get sentimental
We really got nothing to lose
we've exhumed all that matters
ripped and torn into tatters
till there's little left we can use
we made our  divisions
voided out any and all revisions
simply put we lit the fuse .. once we started defying, denying
consistently implying
that everyone's lying
crying out that it's ...
all just more fake news!




.

It  ain't always fiction
And you' ll feel that friction
When you get dragged across...
... those memories
That are as rough as cobblestone
And you know that means you
really are...  really really really are
all alone

Bleeding like rain from all your wounds
That you ignored  
Or tried to - for so long
Like trying to find happiness
While listening
Listening to the saddest tunes

Cant ever really dance
When you are broke in half
No matter how hard you try
Cannot turn those painful days
Into good nights by trying to fake a laugh

When you know
That you still leave a trail
Everywhere  you go
from the sharp edge of each fine detail

When you are being dragged
over those
Cobblestone memories
as it keeps all
those wounds bleeding - just like water flows

And you know...OH YEAH!
Yeah you really know
That it will take some time
To allow your SELF to really heal
Both your body and your mind
Until one day
You take a chance
and glance behind ...To find
exactly what you need
That you did indeed... manage to succeed
In weathering out the storm

Because ...BECAUSE...

though the wounds do still exist
you see that they no longer bleed
Cobblestone ...Cobblestone
Time to allow my memories
To stand on their own
Whatever they turn out to be
Whatever they turn out to be....TO ME!

Love trusts
the way water will trust
the path thru hill and Valley
around Rocky turns
and that is how
a river is born

so that people who love
have loved
Will Be Loved
and will be remembered... ...forever
Like those  Sunday drives
and evening walks
for that is the kind of love
that keeps water flowing
keeping in its wake
so many  flowers growing ...
...always growing!
Just  love pure. so you can
live and breathe and grow!

,, when I find no ground
Beneath my feet
I know that I am
Totally incomplete
So I hover here
Invisible-  to everyone
Even to myself I know
So I can't decide what to do
Or which way to go
Because there is…
... No direction
When everything looks the same
Can't be lost
Can't be found
I can not open up
You cannot shut me down
I can't find my way back
Or even move ahead
Can't remember the last thing I heard
Or the last thing that I said

There's no religion
No mantras echoing in my head
way down deep inside
Not even a buzzing sound
To remind me that I'm alive
No places to run away from
Or even to run to

No answers to the questions
That I don't even have
No place I need to be
Or distances I need to go
No guiding hand to lead me
Along the invisible Trail
No cheering crowds ...
…...encouraging me to win
Nothing to measure…
… the degree to which I fail

I live in limbo
Suspended in a warp of time
As erratic as I am static
Getting further and further
away from what
Once I was supposed to be
Even though I really know
I'm a million little pieces of me
Moving at the speed of light

, even though I really know
That I am here suspended
In this uncomfortable chair
So long now I have
hovered here
Can't feel my body
Can't feel my legs
Everything has gone to sleep
, Eyes Wide Open as I
Fall into the deep
Burning down and I'm burning out
Like a lit and derelict cigarette
As I keep  scattering little pieces of me
All over the world…
... By way of the internet

I am totally incomplete!

I know not
why - we
collectively do
what- we
do not- or even
try to  understand

I know not
how- we
connect into
that which they
will not allow or endow
what we demand

I know not
when we
decided to
undo - not view
that knot
that was once
that strand

I  know not
where we
go from here
once we
don't get to imbue
Upon Our Land

I know not
who you
listen to
when naught
was said that engendered
to expand

even the smallest thought
or doubt - idea or regret
or what- might- be lost
by  those
who care not why...
... they just do !
Might that be you ?
Well...
... it's not me!

I dare not cross the boundary line
So fair the cost yet not the fine
That takes the toll on all man- kind
As to be pulling taught the rapines knot
That's not the prize for why we fought
For what is right when left has naught
The will to turn back from fates designed
As destiny is ill equipped to leave behind
Any trace of wha it might well divine

So I steer my steed with sudden need
And engage my rage to reckless speed
To race the wind without the need
to persevere against all forces that impeed
I thought it best to take a rest for I confessed
To myself a fear my humanity has regressed
A restlessness pervades as I wander this wilderness
Urging my return to full concern so now I hear the war cries...
                       ...long before I top the crest!