Dear Universe
Please
Give everyone
Exactly
What they deserve

My first kiss
Was with a boy named
Rainbow Gribbon
We were sitting atop a roof
Of a house shaped like a mushroom
In Provincetown
It was probably 40 years ago
But I bet he remembers it
Too

When I started writing poetry
We used notebooks

Something about
That Boy
Which makes it impossible
To meet anyone who
Measures up
But
Lots of fools
Can measure down
Just like him
Impulsive
Is always dumb
And rarely
Dumb luck
That Boy
The most beautiful mess
I've ever encountered

Let's face it
Canada is notable
Because of maple syrup
And how amazingly
Resilient and
Kick-***
It's indigenous peoples
Are

Luckily I do not need to be put back together
Before I learn to fly

Clothes may be
Directly related
To obesity

After an eventful
And exciting water balloon fight With my grandkids,
I have realized the world
And grandmothers' backs
Are in desperate need
Of biodegradable
Water balloons

People look so beautiful
When they are blushing
Embarrassed is gorgeous

It makes me feel bad
To know Jesus'
Last thoughts were
"Father
Why have you forsaken me?. "
If the New Testament
Was written today
That would have been
Most certainly
Edited out

Men are stronger than women
But
Women are tougher than men

There are few things more pitiful
In this first world society
Than a man
In stretchy pants
With a
Pointing down *****
Getting a *****
In a situation where
Adjustment is
Out of the question

I'm hoping I'm not
The type of poet
Who will be thoroughly
Appreciated
After I'm dead
It would be just my luck
To be famous
Posthumously
All my poems
Shared for free
No money
For my family
That seems to be
The luck of me

I've never been in the same state
As that boy
But I feel his presence
Whereover
And
Allever
How can it be
That boy
Means so much to me

Bo Derek would have
Caught huge flack
For her style in
"Ten"
If cultural appropriation
Was offensive
At the time

Everyone is thinking it
You are the only one who
Don't see
Nobody else will tell you
Nobody else, but me
Here you sit
So whiny
Insulted as you can be
All I can say is
You're welcome
For my obvious honesty

I think that means
"In my honest opinion"
But why the Hell
Would anybody have to
Clarify
They are giving their
Honest opinion?
Only liars would have to clarify

Humans are the only animals
To produce tears
When we cry
Humans are weird

Religious freedom includes the decision not to be religious .

The ice cream man
With his insistent melody
Holding parents hostage
To the tune of
Roughly twenty bucks
For items they could easily have Remembered
To buy
At the grocery store
For $3.95

How can we be
The society we claim to be
While totally supporting
A very, very huge
Entity
Which openly practices
Gender discrimination

We are all the little drummer boy
Who had no gift
Bought or bartered
But share our inherent gifts
Freely
And heartily
Making beautiful music

The difference
Between
Ignorance and stupidity
Is that
The ignorant person
Is capable of knowing better
But doesn't

We Americans have so much Faith in our election process
That we don't consider it can
Be bought
By the richest man around
It's actually delusional
For us to assume
The election was not bought

My poems are short
I tend to be a haiku poet
Totally lacking in
Discipline

Once upon a time
There was an island
Of big dicked men
The small dicked men
HATED the big dicked men
Of course
The small dicked men
Were busy inventing things  
And the big dicked men
Well, they didn't invent a lot
Satisfied with what they had
I suppose
The small dicked men
Used their inventions
To subjugate the big dicked men
Because they hated them
Out of jealousy
Which almost always turns evil
The little dicked men
Turned evil
And had to prove
Somehow
They were better than
Big dicked men
All along
It made small *****
Smaller
Evolution and Karma
Are great business partners

I remember
After my daughter died
I had the incredible need
To beleive there was a Heaven
Twenty years later
I have accepted
There is no Heaven
And this life is
Gift enough from God
I expect nothing more from Him
God owes me no Heaven
And I still worship Him
If there is a Heaven
This attitude will probably
Get me in

Nobody talks about race anymore
And in a way
I wish we could open the conversation
Because racism is there
But we all pretend it is not
I would rather we could
See it
We allow racism to maintain
By keeping it in the shadows

That beautiful brain
With the wise ***
Attitude
So reluctantly romantic
It makes your sweetness
Feel like flying
Even in memories
It's still a high
So **** fine
Too
With your afro
And your braids
And your "frohawk" jokes
And your teeny tiny pudgy belly
Lovely frame for that perfect belly button
Half outie
That's also an innie
That **** southern twang
Playing my heartstrings like a
Banjo
So perfect
You sent me **** picks
Even when you were limp
Because you've  got that kind of
Confident swag
A boy not scared to be soft
Is **** as ****
You're simply
That Boy
For me

I have a dream
That one day
A white man will say "******"
And a black man
Will take it as a compliment
Then
We will all finally be healed
From the disease of the past
If it could ever happen
I have a dream
That when people say "******"
It will mean
"Person who's ancestors built this Nation
Into greatness
With their bare hands
And sweat"

God made Adam
And thought
Ugh!  I can do better than this!
God did not make Eve as a
Companion
Clearly
She was an upgrade

There is that incredible
Dance
Between two people
Who know
They are never going to have ***
Together
But always wish they could

How many lies
Does it take
Before you stop believing
That lover
Who lies to you
All the time
You keep blaming the lover
For lying to you
It's a twisted
Guilt game
Y'all got going
But darlin'
You playing it
Too

The greatest treasure
You can give
Anyone
And everyone
Is to accept them
For who they are

God Loves Water
She displays Her miracles
Through water
She clears mistakes
Away
With water
God probably lets more whales Into Heaven
Than She does
People

Your love poem to that girl
Felt like your declaration of gay
Horniness
For her ex boyfriend

I tried contemplating
What,
If any
Band or singer is reminiscent of
My poetry
I don't know what it means
That I might be mostly
Bare Naked Ladies

We poets are such fakers
We're always talking
Writing
By picking up the
"Ink and quill"
Not a one of us
Has written with a quill
Or even ink
Unless it's in our
Printer

Today
I actually said
To a man
The words
"You're a good-dicked
Goober."  
And other people
Witnessed this

We had the stone age
The iron age
The bronze age
And the oil age

Dude
You can't be serious
With the
Romeo
Love poem shtick
You got going on
You trying so hard to attract
*****
Well
Let's just say
***** finds that very
Unattractive
Just be kind
Preferably smart
And definitely thoughtful
Girls don't want Romeo
We would prefer Bob the Builder

Ever have one of those days
When it feels like
Your teeth are wearing a
Sweater
Even after you've brushed them
More than once

When I was maybe 12
Or 13
I started stealing money from
Nana' s pocketbook
Or "my bag"
As she would call it
One day
We were in her bedroom
And she went into her bag
And I could tell
She noticed the money missing
She didn't accuse me of
Stealing it
She just started chasing me
Around the bed
She was muttering under her breath
Which she was almost out of
And near tears
Since that moment
I have never stolen
A thing
Not one thing
I hope I remembered to tell her that
When I grew up

"We've used up and wasted all of our resources, so now we're gonna steal them from you.
And charge you for it"

Our friendship got caught in a
Hurricane
That, ironically
Bore your name
Since then, you've been lost at sea
I, too
Am reluctantly free

Sometimes
When a person is talking about how they are absolutely  
Not racist
Well
They're just so **** racist about it

Remember the time
Michael Jackson
Tried to convince us
He was banging Lisa Marie
Presley

I don't have a
"One that got away"
I have a
One I wish I didn't have to
Get away from

I have actually fallen in love with a boy
On account of his playlist

It wasn't only that Emmett Till
Made the kiss face to the
White girl
It was that he was
So **** fine
She liked it