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 Jan 2014 Kay Reed
RA
drowning
 Jan 2014 Kay Reed
RA
I can't sleep, I close
my eyes and hear only
her voice in my ears, roaring
like high tide in a rising
crescendo of anger, until
I sit up, gasping for air.
January 20, 2014
1:24 AM
     written directly, unedited
 Jan 2014 Kay Reed
Jessie
Gatsby
 Jan 2014 Kay Reed
Jessie
we smoked our cigarettes
and belted out car duets

never listened to any advice
figured trial and error would suffice

we ate past when we were full
and felt life's strange alluring pull

but we learned it was never enough
to sit back and relax and love

you can't repeat the past, Gatsby
I wish someone would have told me
Stare away into a vacuum. There's always something entertaining happening in that
vacuum and it needs your undivided attention.
2. Master a blank expression especially when staring into the vacuum or directly at
anyone.
3. Never laugh or smile in social gatherings or ever.
4. Be a miser with your words, use one-word responses and add a few grunts and
guttural sounds to your vocabulary.
5. Believe every male is a ******.
6. Never show emotions, especially obvious ones like happiness, surprise, or sadness.
These may serve as conversation starters and you don't want that.
7. Don't necessarily avoid all eye contact. If the person is obviously determined to
make contact with your pupils, give it to them. Stare them down and continue to
stare. If they say something, don't respond just keep staring.
8. Crushing on someone? Don't even bother. They don't want you.
9. Fine, you can't help your crush, these eyes you must definitely avoid.
10. Use up all your tech gadgets, phones, iPods, even a **** calculator can help,
after all the measly remains of your bank account isn't going to check itself.
Anything with words u can pretend to read is also helpful, even your last grocery
receipt that you just randomly found in your purse.
11. "I don't know" is a very good answer for almost every question you're asked.
To make it seem less harsh (if you even care) you can substitute for "not sure"
12. Always pretend to listen, nods and grunts are helpful for this.
13. The less you move your body or your face the better, they're all watching you,
judging you, trying to study you remember that.
14. Paranoia is your friend.
15. Refuse all food or drinks. Do not let them see you eat.
 Jan 2014 Kay Reed
pale moonlight
it's been
572 days
since 'you' and 'I'
were 'we'
and it's been
571 days
since you decided to hate me
for breaking your heart
whilst trying to save my own
and it's been 640 days
since i fell in love with you
and the way you talk
and your voice at 3a.m.
i've been with 6 people since then
and had about 14 crushes
and you're still at the back of my mind
pushing forward
it's been 4 hours
since you last broke my heart
just a little bit more than before
but still enough to feel it
and finally
it's been 0 seconds
since you made your last appearance in my head
and i thought about how you used to hold my hand
with our little fingers
i/n/t/e/r/l/o/c/k/e/d
so you could break us apart
when anyone you knew came round the corner

(it's been two years and you're still breaking my heart)
 Jan 2014 Kay Reed
pale moonlight
drowning my sadness
in cigarettes,
three day old wine
and ecstacy
trying to find something
to make me feel alive
like i think i once did
but i can't remember
feeling anything but wrecked
 Jan 2014 Kay Reed
sayona
numbers.
 Jan 2014 Kay Reed
sayona
i've always been oddly quite good with numbers
but i think i've gotten better since you left
it has now exactly been 489 days
since your awful, agonizing, piercing words
tumbled from out of your lips
and it's been exactly 489 days since you broke my heart
and shattered it into a million insignificant, microscopic pieces
that i'll probably never be able to piece back together.
inspired by pale moonlight. her poetry is great.
 Jan 2014 Kay Reed
sayona
you were like my favorite book
i read you from cover to cover
and adored getting to memorize
all of your words and phrases
i placed cute, little bookmarks
in between the pages
on which i had stopped
and folded the corners of the pages
that were my favorite
and that i wanted to read over again later
i highlighted my utter most favorite quotes
that had tumbled from your lips
(that i admired)
and underlined all the things
that you claimed to hate
but that i
truly cherished
i read in between the lines
of black and white
and figured out your true feelings
when you covered yourself in a mask
and made everyone around you
believe differently
i kept you
and read you over and over
time and time again
simply for my own pleasure
my cat climbed on top of you once
and he rolled over onto his belly
and he started to purr when he saw
just how much you lit up my eyes
and my my smile brighten
but it's kinda sad
really sad actually
that you were my favorite book
because for me
you were a story
that i wanted to cherish
and changed a little every time
i had read it
and i loved it even more
each time i did
but to you,
i was nothing but a line
not even so
merely a word
that went in one ear
and quickly out the other
edited a million times.
i hope it's okay.
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