Is it bad that every time i hear your name my heart races faster than the speed of light. Does that mean my heart beats for you or am i just scared to face the fact that all the time spent meant nothing to you. Am i trembling because i gave you my all and you gave me so little of yourself. Am i scared that you'll run away with my secrets and never remember them. Will you think of me? No you wont even remember my name because promises can be made and still be broken. My heart can be mended and shattered again as if it was a glass vase on your table that you never really cared for so you dropped it and threw away the pieces. Am i but just a thought in the very back of your mind. So when im gone youll miss what you no longer have. A friend who loved you unconditionally. In that case will i ever be truly gone.

I write poems, but they arent poems. They are writings, usually about the same thing, but how i feel. I write how sad i am and i pity mmyself,  but if i didnt who would. There i go again pitying myself. But honestly i have no one to pity for me. And that may sound self centered but so be it. I wish i had someone to cry to or talk to
But i dont. I have people that say yeah you can tell me anything, but in all actuallity they just want you to tell them so they can throw it back in your face. Im sorry but i dont deserve it. I deserve someone to listen and help me. Sorry if that is too much to ask for.