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 May 2015 Kathy Dehaven
effaced
i dont really understand,
why this happens to me.
why my father doesn't truly care.
why my mother is in prison.
why i cant help but want to die,
or try and fly away.
everytime nana is near,
i feel my eyes pleading with her.
she once told me
'just wait, your time will come.'
but im sure thats just what she tells herself
so she doesn't go insane.
 May 2015 Kathy Dehaven
effaced
too bad, i'm too close to stop.
the crazy train skipped my stop
and is plunging me through hell.
nothing about me is right, or okay, i wont get well.
 May 2015 Kathy Dehaven
effaced
i crave for the  blood flow

i cry for the **non-existent love
_
I'm stuck between two,
two,
One that hurt me,
And one that I hurt,
Two,
****!
A broken mirror,

A bleeding fist,

A sliver blade against a wrist,

Tears falling down to lips unkissed,

Ignore her and she won't exist,

She's not the kind you'll come to miss..
_ _
They say things get better,
but they don't you just,
get use to it.
Maybe there was another choice and we just don't know what it is quite yet...
at this moment i don't know whats going to happen to him...
will he go through with it?...**** i hope not
is it my fault?.. yes, it is
He hurt me so i pushed him to his breaking point and i'm not even sure as to what i said... I  went straight to being straight savage on him before realized what i could be doing to him...
I am sorry sweety-pea i truly am.
Not only for if you go through with this, but for not being her...
For not being what you wanted me to be for you
I'm sorry i can't be  that perfect... but i'll try for so much perfection next time...
I promise!!!!!!!!
_
Stupid us
thinking we were
in love.*



Stupid me
thinking I was finally
good enough.
You see cutters
don't cut for attention,
they cut because they have
an addiction.
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