I should sleep more but I don't want to get addicted
The dreams and rest can be intoxicating
I feel it as I rise
God knows what's inside

Your love will fill me like an oil well
Slick and thickly
Ground
to
heavens
tell

Sabotaging self
Drifting in the sea fearing what's below and above me
Stuck in stage of limbo not knowing which way to go
Part of hope is sinking
Part of hope is drifting
A part wants to live
Some bits to forgive
Others to show them what I'm made of

Love so high it can make you cry
Dark so low it can make hearts bow
The light felt as soft and bright
Fears can melt in the blink of all seeing eye
Death grips on to the hips it slips its unseen face to mask your shadows
Connected to source of all things
Drifting away on a black birds wings
Feeling nothing and everything
Sometimes makes the feeling sting
Numbness comes in to present
things
Holding on
to
new days
New gifts
A love that gets it

You have to start loving your pain
Or you will hate it
and breed
             more

If you're not busy laughing
You're busy not laughing

Seems like in relationships it just teaches me where I need to work on self worth
As when I love another outside me
I'm only left feeling incomplete
lonely
Though I hurt less
alone

Messiah with throne up high
Coronation crown of thorns
Arms stretched open
Heart is wide
Healing hands pinned from outside
Inside there's a home
A love you can't deny
See yourself in every man
God's greatest noble plan
They not yet to see
Shown by righteous mercy
Sacrifice for all that shall pass to be
Blood shed colour of corolla
A shade bled from the heart
Crown always to heavens stars
Healing forever in the soul
Your touch of purity Of gracious whole
No death to only those that die
The hill ascended shrine
The dark tomb no cold
No mind
Veins of green leaf vine
Climbing to spirits life
Divine

Rose
+
bloom
from mortal
coil
of
man

I will devote my life to you and let your radiant light flow
and
shine
through

No matter the pain the lessons the strife
Even with the rain
In a weird way
Will miss this life

My most devoted friends are those I've never met

I'm scared to love again and that's the truth

I was just thinking
Not about much really
What if..I'm the moon the stars the rising and setting sun
The feminine the masculine
The need to be brave the crave of nothing
The past I've been the present I am the future I'm yet to become
The witch the seer the prophesier the believer
The angel the demon the shadow the light the great divine
The carer the healer the no friend in sight the lone cold darkest souless night
The egotist the narcissist the I'm soo wrong the I'm soo right
The pragmatist the pessimist the optimist the uptight
The woman the innocent the playful childlike
The life force the serpent snake
The doubter the trust in faith
The oppressor the saving grace
The learner the teacher the mistakes made
The adult the babe
The strength the weakness the sensitive the afraid
The abused the abuser the broken the unscathed
The passionate the dreamer the practical the changed the evolved the unchanged
The human the alien race
The past lives this face this time this place
The no time the no self the shifting in dimensional space
The gloom the misery the joy the spirited taste
The source to connection the all knowing and the unknowing fate
The ending the beginning now to wait..


What if.. I am everyone everything nothing / no-one

Out
of
nothing
Exists
you

So I hear the world outside getting louder
The voices raised
Chaos filled
It's rowdy at times in the streets round here
The insecurities and aggravations take flight
I know what will sort out the roots of hurt
Alcohol and a good fight
When will they want to make it right
Look
inside
It's just another Saturday night

Ceiling above shifts and moves
Dreams speaking unspoken words
Lift and pull rest and waking lull
Seen mesh with unseen
Wave length unknown
Lights out
Off we go. .

I like you when you are kind to me
When you kiss me upon meeting or make me that boss cup of tea
I like to lay with you
Body to body
Hand in hand
Smooch the nape of my neck
Make me laugh to tickle the sensitive spot
I like when you teach me about things I don't know
To sit with you and laugh at a movie or funny show


I don't like when we row

And I don't like when we part

  I think you and I need to begin in the head and end with an open 
heart

<3

When I go out I create the feeling I would like my day to bring
Is it happy calm amazing fantastic magical fun loving comforting
When I stay in I tend to feel let the emotions rise up and in
Write read meditate bathe soak exercise breathe release
letting go again

Hold me
Let's pretend we can still love

Enamored against his will
Her love became the chill
that warmed up
his
frosted
heart

Sipping on solitude fills up mind
Reaching out to another no compatibility to find
Want to be the self
Not falling behind
Hiding
Giving out only snippets to minimize the doubt
Eyes glaze
Mouth stout
Understand each path walks its legs
Understand not all can see from same view
Understand love for each other
Care for me and you
Glances come from different angles a window some times narrow or too wide
Home lives central inside
Let each have their place the knowing resides
Sometimes I just want to play from a mountain high
in the sky

The moth drawn to the light repeatedly gets burned
Over time this moth has seen and experienced so learnt
Now it flies free and dancing in the dark
Pirouetting in open skies
Joyous frolicking lark
It finds its spark under stars
And the light of moon knows all too well
Moths wings rest and expand to the illuminant swell

When I'm down
Kick
Kick
Kick
and Kick
One day I won't notice

     Or feel a thing

Eyes rubbed out to light outside
Flowering world comes to life       Right before your starry eyes
Perhaps peeking a glimpse of  you  and the light that shines on through
to galaxies
of distant suns

She wasn't everyone's cup of tea..
..but even the coffee drinkers
wondered if they could
change their order

Hold on they say
Do what's right
Even in the blackest of night
Be the mother
The lover
The father to all
To care for hatred
To those who fall
Nurture your heart to give to mine
Healing the self can redefine
You grow your worth and ground if others
do cross the line
You are a lion
A lioness
An eagle in full flight
A bat sensing the cave without eyes sight
A tiger
Tigress
A dragon of fire
Breathing hard and full with will to fly higher
Though you feel the dirt beneath your feet
You sympathise to the troubled
Struggling merchant
Beggar on the street
You know your strength and where you stumble weak
You are tender to touch
but
your bold folds
Deep

Crying from One eye
Left or Right
Feminine tide or Masculine Fire
The Fire Burned Bright Tonight

Climb the ladder
rung by rung
Losing grip
Feet are
           flung
Keep on climbing to the ledge
Keep on loving
til the bitter end
Falling
back
to
make
amends

We are dying to ourselves
Our past has paved the way
The experiences shaped us
Sometimes got in our way
The surroundings opened or closed us
The longings tore our hearts
The not belonging fraught us
Told us we should part
We are dying to ourselves
The ones we thought we were
The ones we thought we had to be
Which shaped our darkly lair
We are throwing away the old
Tearing it at the seems
We are observing past patterns and pulling out the guillotine
We are dying to ourselves who we once were who we believed and deemed
The breaking down is painful but so has the images and beliefs we have seen
How do we become now
How do we begin
We start from what we love
The heart and souls dream
We build
The dream team

There's a hole in my aura a scar I must heal
There's a burning in the solar an effigy to feel
There's a sorrow in my heart from the winters summer has concealed
My mind can plague or amaze
Thoughts can progress or drag sober or lag
Spirit flies above lack
Love calls me back

A garden of extensive beauty
Luscious greens swaying in the wind
Vines climbing reaching high
Flowers growing in the meadows scented smile
Fountains of youth
Rows of bountiful fruit
Lakes of shimmery sparkle
Pools of warm waters embrace
Sunsets of passion
Sunrise of lights ray
You are the setting scene
You are the King
You are the Queen
You are the love of a new day

Black & White
Yin & Yang
Captivating drawing presence in
A trance into the contrast and parallel
The beauty in the dark and light dwell
Calling into balance
Awareness
Rise and Fall
Complementary enthral
Opposites to bring whole

Smiling all the way home
I walked with skip in step
Surrounding nature's beauty
Life's radiant breath
Leaves rainfall on the ground
Colours bright from floral bloom
Emerald and amber garland hanging frame of picturesque view
Love and earth in harmonic tune

Your words bitter
Issues with you in that mood
I'll let them slide more easily and not hold on too tightly
But somehow they come back to me

Apparently he could of fixed me
I must be so broken
Crack the egg
And watch the yolk run

Do you want a taste of me,
or to feel me?
There's a difference
between
the two

Some souls you just gravitate to
Some slowly move
away

Was in a dream
I picked up some flowers they had been set down on the grass as a tribute, mark of respect was the to take as remembrance of your own
I placed the flowers bright pink and yellow onto soft grass
You then came by
We talked some small talk, not much
You lay down alongside me
You made a rollie
Smoked away
I drew, the pencil was drawing grand buildings I let the pencil construct and flow with the scene
You looked on
You were nervous so joked, made up another smoke
I knew you had so much more to say
I did too
We didn't need to
...
I can feel you
.

Consumed by anxiety daily
Depression shifts and folds
Try to work through the social phobia but struggle to go out mostly alone
Make it to work and back sometimes walk the dog but still haven't found the striding knack
To go out without the doubt
Past worries took the mount
One of pain and setbacks
You would think the endless faced battles and the street (most feared) attack would finally see to that
I'm not brave
Just living with being weak

You've lived the lows
You've died inside
You've met the love that stole your heart your mind
You've despised the self
You've cried
Too many times
You can't go back
Onwards you must climb

The aura of your aroma inspires the air even after you are gone
A drop of you is all I need to hold on
Strong scent of intimacy
Close to soft skin
Your aromatic fragrance
prevails
me

Visions in my head when I close my eyes
To my self of reason wonder why
To subconscious of no surprise

He pulls her in close
Both stood in front of the mirror
He turns her around to see
He whispers softly in her ear
" I see it in you"
She replies "What?"
He replies
"Me!"

If something doesn't resonate
Don't make it fit
Follow your heart intuition inner knowing
You may change your mind in time and it could align
Though for now
Feel how You feel
Be real to Your needs

Taste me with your lips
Hear me as I am
Hold me with my passions
Never feel me as undone
Wild women grown from the depths of earth the howl of sweet savage air and fiery flames of sun
So make me moan with pleasure on wings of ecstasy
Or run far away as I fly to where true natures heart calls destined home to be

The world was spinning not from its turn
The spinning mixed with other worlds
Around and round upside down
Kept feet to solid ground as head was whirling place unbound
Existence from outer space
Touching form
Firming state
Dream or real
Matter creates

I thought about killing myself many times
Once when he told me the pills took weren't enough
A time when the oncoming cars felt enough
The bringing myself to the not good I'm not tough
The worst is the pain when feel not or never really loved
Your heart breaks you take what you should
It's a shame we deserve all we feel we could