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 Nov 2014 jvb
Harry J Baxter
I'm a *******
I guess
but i always thought of me
as a human canvas
your blank slate
do I like the pain?
I've always had a high tolerance
but do I like it?
I guess not
but when it boils down to it
I'm happy
to be your punching bag
the dead air
which you fill with songs
older than time
these scars
are an ode
to your life
a beautiful poem
even the ones
which you can't see
I'm more like a billboard
than a man
but my ad space
will always be reserved
for you
 Nov 2014 jvb
courtney
The worst part is that when I
walk in the door, I'm slapped in the face by
two radiant smiles
that deny
we just screamed at each other.
Or did we?
Maybe you just blocked it out and I
choked -
Screaming in my sleep
to stop the road from escaping
my feet
and leaving me panting from
either crying for hours or
running for miles.
I guess that doesn't matter now because
I can't feel any of it, not
the boiling hot tears that
sting my eyes or
their salt that attempts to exfoliate
my dry, raw skin;
Colourless, now, because sunlight gives
life and I've taken that away -
I can't stand another bright,
happy face as I sit here
drowning
in whatever takes my fancy.
And the rollercoaster enters a deep descent...
 Jul 2014 jvb
tdf
Untitled
 Jul 2014 jvb
tdf
Don't sugarcoat anything
Unless you want pests
 Jul 2014 jvb
courtney
I love winter.
It's okay to be sickly white,
I now have an excuse.
I like the coffees, the hugs,
the chilly wind that lets
you know you're
alive.
I love evening runs when
the sun goes down
three hours earlier,
and I have
to race it home.
I love searching
for a heater in every classroom,
then staying for so long I
burn my feet.
I love hot roasts at dinnertime;
thick gravy soaking my insides.
I love movie nights and
fortress building;
the inventive activities
my friends must come up with
to do together because
the park, pool and plaza
are all off-limits.
I love the mornings when
the warmth from my bed is
so compelling
leaving would be
betrayal to a lover.
I love watching the legs
of a primate unfold
beneath me as my
razor collects dust
and I have no reason
to clean it.
I love putting on my
entire wardrobe and
counting the layers between
my body and the
ghostly hands of ice
that try to reach
my bare skin.
I love putting on a beanie and
shielding the world
from my
awfully bad hair day.
I love all my excuses for not
doing anything.
 Jun 2014 jvb
courtney
These devils lie awake while you sleep;
surfacing the seas of your mind.
They taunt you as you dream,
daring you to see past the nightmares
so vividly painted out before you.
As safe as you ever felt they were always lingering,
just around a corner that wasn't there;
so close the wind you thought carried you
was the fire from their breath
seeping through your lungs
and flooding your veins.
In your prison you pictured bold colours blending
together and creating worlds of their own
in the smudged corners of contrast.
A bright world, where happiness grows
on trees and devils lurk in your dreams.
All this you kept with you, locked away
in some part of your heart that couldn't
be enlightened with the truth;
you are tormented by these demons that
relentlessly surround your cage.
It's too late for your mind, you've been
deceived, your heart taken captive.
Watch as you restlessly lay wake,
envisioning your decay.
 Jun 2014 jvb
courtney
They don't want to see you. They don't want to talk to you;
They want to gaze into a mirror and have a conversation.
They can't engage in any thoughtful conversations, they bury
any trace of originality under the exterior image they 'prepared earlier.' Their opinions are ideas formed like dough that was pressed into a cookie-cutter then cooked – hardened to ensure
they remain the same.
A united front of face-value originality conceals - just a mask to hide behind.
 Jun 2014 jvb
courtney
Scattered
 Jun 2014 jvb
courtney
Something inside me
Instantly falls apart and
An ache is all that's left when
The sharp edges of each fragment
Lie scattered, puncturing
Near organs in their
Beautiful array of
Brokenness
...
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