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Justan Rahming Feb 2013
How can I continue my journey now
I have to get out but I don’t know how
trapped in this Barron land of pain
walk into the fields of the brutally slain

I’ve had lives slip from my hands
memories flow like hourglass sand
regret weighs down my heart and soul
It burns inside like a burning coal

I fall to my knees and stare at the sky
I become weightless I start to fly
Fear and sorrows flood my chest
what happens now, what will come next

I feel a release of my earthly state
Ive walked through the eternal gate
stars around me burn so bright
there is nothing now that escapes my sight

creations of dimensions, I’m not bound by chains
Feeling warmth with out the radiance of flames
The past is not me, I no longer have sins
This new reality for me now begins

Images of worlds and amazing lights
I reign in existence between death and life
Power I feel cannot be explained
the life force of mine cannot be drained

Death was a blessing not a curse
To turn away from the life I had first
But now I’m eternal, now I am extreme
This is my life now, my wake-less dream
Justan Rahming Sep 2018
If this poem ended up in an anthology,
that would be cool–
Then people would have to read this in school
Justan Rahming Jun 2019
His story is boring and long,
full of contradictors, who played
little to no purpose

The ending, oh that ending
predictable, and again, had
little to no purpose

I am… I am… A failure
He said

Never saw him again
but that tall tale he told
stays with me
no matter how bad
Justan Rahming Oct 2018
Breathe in the brisk air of life
Breathe out the exhaust from your heart
the air around me is muggy
I cannot catch my breath
This is what it feels like
to be intimate with death
Justan Rahming Feb 2013
Warmth radiates from inside the black
As fire grows in the coldest depths
With a black hole absorbing the light back

The fire burns hotter the more it hides
the conflagration from below struggles to rest
energy is created that cannot subside

Soon the power cannot be enclosed
for the heat of the fire will burn through
Fear erupts as the radiance of flames flows

Will the fire survive the cold alone
feeling lost in a world thats new
Or will it be meet another flame that has grown

Joining together to envelope all
bring illumination to all corners of darkness
Or will it die in the cold alone and forever fall
Justan Rahming Jul 2019
Speak in code
trying to not say
what I mean

Stay inside
I can hear the rain
go away

go online
see what people say
a mistake

my back hurts
I shift in my seat
it still hurts

energy within
bright face looking back at me
turn off the TV

It is dark
I should go outside
I am out

smells like ****
the smell of the air
grow from ****

side by side
suburban living
the lifestyle

what is there
under that building
I don't care

chest rattles
kick out the arches
move forward

strong tree branch
my prismatic friend
please don't break

crawl on me
I can feel your legs
treat me well

tree to tree
a slaughter of twigs
the kings loom

sit on the hard ground
uncomfortable and longing
this is all I get
Justan Rahming Jun 2019
Do I care if someone reads this?
Just a few words that I put together one night.
A blog wrapped in a medium of stone age art.
I spend my life building these structures,
semi representation of my underlying self
replicating a random style, theme, and form.

All this time of study on how to find rhyme,
interlocked with philosophical quandaries
and a self-reflection of my psychological state.
Winding out long hidden feelings, sending it all out,
like yelling out the window to see who actually turns.

Though, do I shout loud enough,
or do I prefer whispering to myself?
I wonder if I care if nobody reads this.
We come into life, and leave it alone for a reason,
our whole being is to be trapped behind our outward gaze.
Madness is external, so is our precious vanity.
Nobody cares, and everybody is a nobody,
So who does?

If my eyes are the last to see these words,
I ask what that means to me.
I put this out to be read,
but if it’s not
do I care?
Justan Rahming Feb 2013
We are trapped in our own river of Time
being pushed forward faster the longer we live
We can see behind us to where we have been
before us we can only guess what will come
There is madness being thrown into the rapids
confusion and disorientation fills my mind
as the cold feelings fill my lungs and heart

I long to sit in a steady pool of water
a lake of peace or an endless ocean
anything to stop this maddening journey
I cannot keep up with the speed of the water
everything that I was has washed away
I am drowning in Time, the present does not exist
constantly moving forward, nothing is now
Justan Rahming Feb 2013
Ive seen the mountains grow before my eyes
Walked the world and saw passing of lives
cursed to see endless cycles of the moon
everyday hoping that It will all end soon

She came to me as a flash of light
to keep me warm through this lonely night
Eyes so strong and hair like rain
help sooth my endless pain

terror arise as times winds blew
ripping way the thread that we sew
weary came from your gaze each day
I could only watch you fading away

Tears so cold run down your face
as the beats of your heart loose their pace
the leaves have fallen on the ground
you lay with them making no sound

Eternity rises for me each day
love is gone, this is the price I pay
Forever I march to never be the same
Until my life is able to tame

Circling suns could never dry my face
I stand here still, forever in this place
Time has taken my life but still I wake
my eternal life’s curse will never break
Justan Rahming Feb 2013
Time bleeds the force out of life
Leaving baron bodies cold and hollow
Every breath took is one breath gone
The tide forcing us in
The shore leaving behind
Salt in the water is the salt in the hourglass
Passing by never to be seen again
Collecting, building castles on shores that will fall to the pressure of time
Lost in the oceans growing older and colder
Ice collecting, time slows and slows
Frozen waters reflects bright lights
Blinded looking ahead blinded looking back
Nothing left but waiting the timeless wait
Trapped, still, at the end of time forever
Justan Rahming Jun 2020
From time to time
I compose a possible banter
Thoughtful and beaming with insight
full in fervor that spoils my ego

I fall to reality as I erase my words
My mind is made up, I wish not to offend with my interruption
Why disturb the sleeper with a specter's presence?
They live their lives with their gaze looking forward
rather than looking back to where I am

I close my eyes to turn the darkness darker
Listening to the constant sounds that rattles the walls
Focusing on the silence in between for peace

It is just me here alone
Dictating force upon the slouching body
Abusing it to do my deeds

I opened my eyes
and tried to write a letter

I deleted it all
I felt I began to ramble
and the rambling of a madman
is something that isolates the madman
alone in his madness

I sit here with my head buzzing
and swirling without any control
as I feel a sickness from the poisoning
that the void of a moment with meaning

Then I hit the wall hard and ask why!

I respond by typing

This is why!

This is nothing
Only a prostration before the chasm of chaos
What do you want me to say?
This is all you got
and that is what it is

What kind of a person are you if this is all you got
You sitting conversing silently with none to hear
trying to make any sense of who I am

So how is this going to end?

You are so tired
You should get some rest

Don't shut down
Answer me!

What could I say to you?
I wish I could get you to understand
that you bring me pain

Anxiety from the withering muscles and joins
of a body that had either been ruined by its creation
or the folly of the the fool that wore it down
Pains in my back and pains from the life you have me put me through
I am trapped in this body fumbling through existence
Suffering from lack of sleep
and from a relentless consciousness
that curses me with incessant ramblings
An unending line of thought
that blends dream and reality
shocking my mind into habits of criticizing all things

You make me angry
You make me wish I was in a different person
You live below the eyes of others
You are burnt by the simpleness of day
You lack what you once loved and you live putrid in your uncaring shame
You don't take care of yourself like you should
Your breath is revolting and you refuse to do the most simplest of actions
all because you just don't care

You live you life like you are going to die any moment
not caring about the mess you leave behind

If I could ask you this question
in a clarity of mind that I solemn come across
I want to know why you want me to die?

My life is that of a wonderful adventure
The collecting of experiences is like that of the collecting of jewels
Steep cliffs strain my legs but they are always conquered by my stride
Dreadful walls stand looming over me
but I know all walls are capable of falling

I know you are tired
I know you don't get any sleep
I am sorry

I am sorry I don't treat you well
because I truly don't think it matters
I don't know how long I will be here
All my luck could give out
leaving me at the bottom
feeling as if I belong there eternally

A fruition of a secret plan that  I have been building for years
A dive into the depths of true isolation
removing myself from those who could miss me
disappearing without them noticing

I'm tired
I'm alone
No one can help me in this way
A way that is locked within me
as I stand in the way blocking the path to freedom

I need to sleep
I'll feel better tomorrow
Justan Rahming Jun 2019
Time to love life with all your heart
Let your eyes feel the day's mind turn to night
Things left to find beyond a long lost light
People's souls reflect the face of pain
Lost thoughts in a good head
keep smiling inside for the sun
with hands in a place that can hold hope
but wishing that the hand might fall
as man's body leaves to live
and beautiful dark sin can hear the thoughts
as cold tears fall hard from the broken sky

And you will ask me, Why?
Justan Rahming Jun 2019
She sat alone with the child of her true love. A true love that will never love her back. Her eyes lift heavy with tears to a reflection of herself on the wall. Pain that only she can see, and only through a lens of tears.

Tired of her selfish view, her eyes tried to focus away from the broken face of emptiness, to focus on a picture of her love smiling beside her. His face frozen with a smile and eyes glimmering in perfect joy of the moment.

With a blink and wipe of her wrist, her eyes focused again to the image of a young girl crying on the ground. Feeling lost within life and herself, having to guide the last remainder of her love to a hopeful life to one unlike her own. She looks back at the photo that is gently placed in the plastic frame, at the photo of a man that had taken her spirit. With the face he will have forever.

And in the corner of her eye, sitting broken on the floor, a reflection of the face she too will have forever.
Justan Rahming Oct 2018
I witness the memories that I no longer have
refreshed new with refracted eye
youth be revisited, I fall in love again
frame after enamored frame
I recall upon your archaic name
filling the room with quantum spirits
lives together in symbiotic dreams
And for one moment, I am alive
over and over again
I find myself
and I am with you
Justan Rahming Oct 2018
What I have
What I can loose
Who am I without it?

Who is Kant
Who is Hegel
Who set the first step in my home

Remember infamy
Remember astronomy
Remember autonomy
Remember polygamy

I forgot your name
Remember it for me
Justan Rahming Feb 2013
where are all the people, where have they all gone?
moved away after things went very wrong
smokey remains stand in place of trees
ashes fly from the flames from the burning leaves

Running any direction, I come to an impenetrable wall
structure so strong, seems to be eternally tall
am I really trapped within this burning down land?
air so thick, with ground so hot, it is hard to stand

Visions before the ashes began to rain
Visions before my eyes of the insane

people crowded in the streets, screaming out
fear flood the air when bodies started to mount
terror and sadness came over my heart and eyes
Hearing the sound of my loved ones goodbyes

Trying to help, nothing is worth more to me now
push them out of harms way in anyway I knew how
over the wall I lift the crying ones
echos sounds from the firing guns

Left behind in this torched land of memory
forever witness to the visions of tragedy
the walls grow over me, in this blackened tomb
I sit near the wall, watching the dark fires insume
Justan Rahming Feb 2013
I have chosen the path to the end of the world
To journey beyond the edge to the sea of stars ahead
The sky burns brighter the closer I get
But once I pass the path is darkened
Looking behind to the fires I have seen
Going forward to the black caves of skies
There is a burn from the stars behind
Rushing me faster away from the past
Cold is the future seeking a road I can see
Far in the distance a single light can be felt
Lightyears away but I travel till the star becomes my sun
Justan Rahming Sep 2018
Silent guitar on the wall
voice of passion and stories of the heart.
You are the tool of my youth,
the path to the hearts
of loves once passed

You know my hands better than I,
every motion, my grace, my limits.
You feel the beating of my heart
and the pain of my growth.

But now the notes have faded and the songs forgotten,
all memories replaced by others.
The sounds have subsided to only
tinkering of frustration.

Leading to you to become
The silent guitar on the wall
Justan Rahming Sep 2018
Willingness to structure situations
appearance for self patience
             mood information outside advantage

               Culture
Humor                  Knowledge

Accent politeness to change choice
Justan Rahming Mar 2020
Riding our aunt guard poultry
is dust riding on sense woods
Doe cut sever few aught
came water ye dew his ****

Hats that fly hid
Fate run fright
Justan Rahming Sep 2018
unrealized movements
inside of one's own head–
quaking knees and twitching hands
sitting slouched and rocking

Spine starts to slide–
relief is but a brief afterthought
as the proper gesture arises
the soles are unearthed

Starting to move as if it can stand
Its inevitable move forward

Get up, time to go
Justan Rahming Feb 2013
[part 1 - The Depending of Rescue]

I've waited so long for you
to take me to the place where light came through
all this time I thought you would save me
But together we were stuck in this dark sea

Myself so lost in this tearing tide
only to find, I was not alone inside
fighting the waves to get free
growing powers grew deep down in me

[part 2 - Becoming Atlas]

Im out into the sky beyond the stars
looking down at the land so far
lost souls still trapped behind
I came back for you, I have to find

Spend my life searching and saving
to stop my heart from this painful raging
help those stand on the land I have found
your still lost in the black, quiet is the sound

I see your eyes, so bright as the brightest night star
Drifting away from my hand, floating so far
Ive spent my life so long to bring you to shore
I cannot stop its what I'm existing for

[part 3 - The Distraction]

In search for you I have saved so much
millions have felt my graceful touch
they plead for me to guide them away
So many I lead to see a new day

Shining light over their homes
making them feel the warmth in their souls
Starting a future that they can live in
But with all my power, I cannot find where you've been

bound by duties you slip away from me
away from view, and deeper into the sea
The older I grow the more of you I miss
but all these feelings I am forced to dismiss

[Part 4 - Atlas Relinquished]

Strength has raged within in my blood
my veins are dried while my emotions flood
away from my heart into the night
tired by the constant shine of light

Broken labored hands are laid to rest
after long years of might's test
exasperation falls over my will
want nothing more to forever be still

I can no longer help to build
I lay slowly upon the field
body and soul unable to lift
watching the world, still, it sits
Justan Rahming Sep 2018
The harbinger of death lives above my bed
holding the rumors of those once said
though every night I hear the screams
ones so sharp they pierce my dreams
I feel the comfort in her glowing eyes
and gripping my soul every time she flies
as soon as I lay my head to rest
she rids my room of unwanted guests
when the shadows invade the ending day
the harbinger of death shall find its prey
Justan Rahming Jun 2020
I look upon myself
Staring longing and in love
Hovering over the waters of creation
Holding the image of my existence in my gaze
The visions of my being
Sharing with me the reflection of devotion

I exist only here for only here I am
Unafraid for I know this is really true

But alas the vengeful Nemesis had replaced my perfect waters
with this stygian puddle
Leaving only the sight of worms creeping out of the mud
Reality forever changed
With me no longer in it

The sight of being is gone
The beauty and love corrupted
Everything is darkened and dreadful
Everything has lost its meaning

I put my hands in the mud
Hoping to create and replace the love of my reflection
To replace upon this Earth what captivated me so
But I could not bring to form what was already perfect
Everything I make is a mockery of my image
Pulling me ever distant
Falling deeper into memory

Nothing I do matters
I no longer exist
My reflection is gone
Justan Rahming Sep 2018
The storm has caught us in its eye
stranded in the sullen seas
as the tears of heaven fall from the sky
echoes grow from our last goodbyes
we all clench tightly dried leaves
holding on to the memories of our land
as they crumble into the breeze
we feel our breath begin to freeze
no more songs for this broken band
no more strength in their weak hands
our hearts now sink below the waves
leaving behind a hollow shell
fading visions turn to haze
surrender to darkness within these caves
there is no more tale in which to tell
forever lost in this darkness in which we fell
Justan Rahming Sep 2018
The Sun is so hot
against my protected skin,
the heat is intense and I burn
from the overwhelming waves–
This, I am not made for.

I find the Sun beautiful
and on nicer days
I enjoy her gentile heat,
but the climate of today
had the Sun turn me red.

I curse the Sun
I reject the heat,
but if the sun was to leave,
then the darkness
would make me too cold.
Justan Rahming Jun 2019
What am I doing?

Some will say nothing
Most will say nothing
Even sometimes I say nothing

What am I to do?

Some will say something
Most will say something

I still say nothing
Justan Rahming Feb 2013
Waiting for the dawn’s light to come for my frozen soul
Wash away the frost that that followed behind the cold
The sun is calling, though the sound is to far to hear
echoing silent winds, blowing shivers of fear

The dreams bring warmth like a flames heated breeze
awaken to know only the lonely feeling disease
The storm never ends while illness it brought
Seeing the life that still sadness begot

The sun comes near, please hear my screams
I try to warm my heart, but now it seems
The suns too far away to cure the chill
Setting suns crush the hope, and damage the will

Star night sky brings hopes through the thin air
Thousands of suns are hidden in the darkness up there
Maybe one will pass to make the snow wither away
calming the storms and protecting this life of dismay

— The End —