This stream of consciousness
Is nonsense
Like following monsters
When monsters
Do. Not. Win.
Only a flounder could swim
To the depths of my sin
If only I found her
Before I got swept in this whim
& that's when I heard her say "maybe"
Again
Let me swerve in reverse
& then change what I did
Now my whole soul is cursed
& this cannot be fixed
This is the last time we kiss
& I'm sure that I'll miss you
I wish this clash would have lasted
But now I'm forced to forget you

Breaking bonds
Like haunted hearts
Inside lost jars
From sunken ships
Lost at sea
I'm lost you see
& I can't tell you that
Cause it's not up to me
[Anymore]

I stood crooked
& overlooked the good
I looked stupid
She never understood
Unwind ruthless
Instead of what you should
I'm now roofless
& drowning in a flood
My blood; truth less
Draining every vein
I feel useless
With no rights to explain
How I'd do this
A brain slain with shame
Like I'm clueless
With only me to blame
Like I knew bliss
But flushed it down the drain
I'll get through this
When you forget my name
& the truth is
This pain will stay the same
Cause you'll never be proud again
And I'll forever be ashamed

I sink
Sank in July
And scrape with my hate
I scraped why
Deep into my sides
Like knives
Falling from the sky
I want them all
To land in my eye
And stab
What's left of my mind
July 5th
You're my sickness
If I had more fists
I'd punch out my own ribs
Blood the color
Of my lipstick
& beg like a liar
With no power
I fly lower
Than ever
& ever
& ever
& ever
& I'll never remember
Why
But I'll always remember
July

I look back on conversations
Full of excitement
I look back at these moments
That ruled and enlightened
This looking back makes me sad
& It's all that I have now
I'm frightened and mad
That this sad has my throat
Pressed down to the mat
Laid flat on the ground
& forced to look forward
I'm twisting my neck  
Cause I haven't learned how
To let go of you yet

I thought I heard you whisper
before I heard you speak
knowing nothing
a b o u t
you
I politely took a seat
now these
days I've spent
and mornings
drinking memories
of a face
that I now long for
haunting
every part of me
an accidental kiss
can feel so monumental
an encounter just like this
can make the soul feel
transcendental
connections give us strength
for they are
natural
and simple
it is the circumstance we thank
for making love in life
essential

Body stomping
like crushed bones beneath lead feet
my cheek meets the ground
my teeth start to bleed
hi it's nice to meet you
says the concrete to my jaw
I said I didn't know you cared so much
it's not often that I fall