Julia Verón: Favorites

Dec 2013 Julia Verón

Overtaken

Dec 2013 Julia Verón

Lauren Marie

I feel the tears coming on
I push them away
Shake my head
Lift my chin
I refuse break
Not again.

I am stronger than to let myself
Be bullied around
By my own thoughts
Fingers pointed
In no specific direction
No fault to blame
No one to call out
Just my intense feelings
Overtaking me.

I push
And push
It’s no wonder I am exhausted
Always fighting to keep my head above water
Either drowning
Or falling under.

My well being getting smaller
Words of others get louder and larger
People don’t hesitate to walk all over
The weak or struggling.

Times have changed
Can’t trust my neighbor
If I need to be saved
Risk doing it alone
Or being disappointed
Options aren’t very desirable
Like choosing between
Bad or worse
Each comes with their own surprises
Hurt or be hurt.

Unsure of the girl in the mirror
Her reflection becoming unclear
I stopped checking glances
Because I only see
Things I want to change
It’s not physical pain
It’s the emotional damage
That keeps me ******.

I feel trapped or lost
So I run
But flight always leads back to fighting
Can’t ever fully escape
It needs to be faced.

I am brave
But not a hero
I have courage
But still afraid
I am powerful
But dart my shadow
I am complex
Simple would be nice for change
But I am overtaken.

Simply overtaken.

Dec 2013 Julia Verón

Barely Inspired

Dec 2013 Julia Verón

-

Barely Inspired

Hungover and tired
I am barely inspired
Mouth tastes of regret
At least it's not *****
At least I'm alright
Not like last night
At least I didn't
Make a mistake
Or take too much
Or consume a lot
Or get a toxic rush
Writer's block *****
No creativity in my blood
No energy in my veins
I keep trying but
Failure again
And again

Dec 2013 Julia Verón

A shower at Sanitas

Dec 2013 Julia Verón

Austin Skye

A shower at Sanitas

I feel worthless right now. I feel like I am empty. Talentless. Worthless. Nothing. I hate it. I know I can change how I feel.. But I don't. I need to wallow in this. I feel like I should not change how I feel right now. It seems as if being worthless makes it so that the only place to go is better. I can only improve if I am already at the lowest. I feel like I can only improve. At the same time I feel like **** about it. At any rate, I sat in the shower for a good twenty minutes letting these emotions course through me. Wash out of m body in a torrent. I let them rage and purge themselves. Like a wild fire they consumed me. Everything in me, and inevitably, the burned themselves out. Used up all the fuel they had. Destroyed the doubt that festered in my thoughts. The left a void inside me. A void in which nothing but hot joy, Happiness could fill in. It left me happy feeling good. Content. Perfect.

These are the thoughts that came through me during and after a shower late tonight. It is a combination of my thoughts. The after effects. My emotions and my analysis of all of the above.

Dec 2013 Julia Verón

Arrogance

Dec 2013 Julia Verón

Gabby O

Arrogance

Call me arrogant
and before you pull out
the bible verse on humility
let me save you the trouble
I've read it

so call me a Pharisee
but I've paid my dues
and the damage is done
but arrogance
I'd love to call it my friend
but it's a lie if it's anything
other than my mistress

There's no name for the trials
the errors and successes
no name for how I feel
when they surround me
consume me
and my whole life
becomes the comparing
and contrasting
of two human hues
of win and lose
because when I win
I see it in bold colors
shining brighter than the losses
if only to dim their light
if only to wipe the record
because arrogance only works
if there's no one to notice the flaws

I thought of this in a car while I was both sad and filled with caffein so. Have my brain ****.

Oct 2013 Julia Verón

to my muse

Oct 2013 Julia Verón

Hastings Padua

to my muse

this is inspiration, when you hold
the quiet of your lips against mine
until only the sound of nothingness
fills this space. the echoing of your heart
inside your cavernous body of beauty
filling this world with the sweet serenity
of continuum. along the glossy sides of your
pure skin, illuminated in the sanctuary of moonlight
and stars, i will run my fingers across the expanse
of your back until they come to rest upon your legs.
i will hold you in my soft embrace, reveling in the peace
that you bring me in this tender existing moment
when nothing matters but now.

Oct 2013 Julia Verón

when i had nothing to write about, i thought of you

Oct 2013 Julia Verón

Hastings Padua

when i had nothing to write about, i thought of you

don’t underestimate my sorrow,
for you do not understand the depths
of this broken body that lies here
in the confinements of not knowing.
i do not want your pity
or your condolences. let me weep in this orchard
where my life has begun to grow, and stagnate.
i feel like this is necessary to lie in the grass
until it wraps its lacy fingers around my neck
and breathes my breath for me. i am volatile
now; i will not bend to your weaknesses.
so please, don’t underestimate what i am
when i walk through those doors to greet you.