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When I was younger,
a moment of existential
panic would have my
buttons coming undone
for boys who didn't care why
but sure loved how.

I'm more beautiful now,
less given to panic, and I
undress for you like this:
one story at a time –  a
metaphoric bump and grind.
I shimmy out of all my lies.
I used to think that monsters lived under my bed,
Hiding in the darkness, with eyes of ruby red.
I'd hide under my blankets, as if they were a shield,
And hope that in the shadows i would be concealed.

But then one day i realized that i had been mislead,
The real monsters i had, were the ones inside my head.
They quietly creep and crawl in the corners of my mind,
Whispering words that make me weep 'til I've gone blind.

They shatter my happiness and suffocate my dreams,
And make my ears ache with the shrill sound of their screams.
They wrap their cold fingers around my worn out heart,
And inside i feel as though they are tearing me apart.
 Jul 2012 juan zavala
Wanderer
My hands gently sift through your silky hair
Pulling softly at the base to hear you moan
A shiver tingles down my spine at your purr
I can be impatient
I can be bossy
But you always give in to my urges
Ripping, tearing, biting, *******, a menagerie of ***** slick sweat ****
Bleed for me
What can they not understand about me needing that?
Crimson welling up beneath your ribcage
Only a small slice, small sacrifice to lay at your *** goddess's  feet
Most bring flowers but only you know what I really want
Copper twist rot ****** at the base of your ****
I can only give love once
Broken and bruised you'll never get the same me twice
Reborn matted and patched
Willing to skull stomp them all to come out on top
Triumphant
Bloodied
Sated
 Jul 2012 juan zavala
Wanderer
Picking slowly through the myth and legends
I find it hard to decipher your cobweb caveman tendencies
All of my reserves quiver when you glance at me
Touch is foreign but electric when we chance to graze
Dreams of your sad eyes splash across my night in vivid hazel wonder

I'm not quite there yet.

You cannot hear me over her static
My soft, reluctant waves over powered by the gaudy onslaught of ****
I may know a thing or two about slippery slits and their uses
But mine is sacred, not thrown around
All they want is you
Grinding between running-with-scissor thighs
Pounding their rough and tumble flesh into tenderized shells
Your eyes are empty though, I see
Inside I burn the one for me

You have become dull, your sight jaded
Hard to even relay my hollowed heart's appreciation
Without being cut down for my trouble
Verse hammer and nail will straighten you out
Sharpen once again that quick silver edge of darkness
That I miss
Fell in love with
*Obsess over
The boats were once used to catch fish,
They say Jesus was a fisher of souls,
Today they are those who dine and wish upon hate's dish,
Our world watches as people are spilled and killed in waters cold.

"What was their crime?"

These poor few who dared to make a stand,
The news tick-tocks the politicians slime-ridden rhymes,
This desert ocean was once the Promised Land.

This small band of courageous folk,
They tried to make a difference,
They sailed and spoke with high hopes,
They took no sides, Peace was their only preference.

Blood upon the sails,
Blood upon the mast,
Blood runs wet in the desert jails,
Blood stains the present and the past.

Peace died here,
Her guts were first spliced then sliced open,
Nothing will save us, not even a prayer,

"Look up there! Do you see Death's raven?"



©Rangzeb Hussain

— The End —