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 Mar 2013 Joshua Garache
Tessa F
I have a confession.
I don't know very much about trains. Actually, very little at all.
I know that they have a beginning and an end, and a whole lot of middle.
Kind of like life.
Trains can take you places,
From here to there
From old to new
From start to finish
But cars can do that. Planes can too.
So why do we take trains? They take so much longer.
Except, maybe that is the whole point; the real reason.
Time is never in abundance, and we are always rushing from one chore or job to the next with no time to take a break or rest or reflect or breathe.
Sitting on a train, with nowhere to go and no control over what time you arrive at your destination, you are forced to be calm.
To just sit, and perhaps even enjoy the moment.
In reality, this is what our goal in life should be: to take pleasure in the journey.

I have another confession.
I really want to ask you to take this train with me.
I want to enjoy this journey with you, ignoring the start and forgetting how soon or abrupt the ending could be.
I want to look at the scenery and talk about pretty things and drink yummy coffee and play footsie under the table.
For the first time in my life I want to be uncertain. I don't want to know when or where or how this will end.
I think there is a part of me that already knows where our next stop is, but I can't get the image of laughing with you out of my head.
Baby, let's just see where this thing takes us.
All I know is that you get my wheels turning and my heart racing.
All I know is our beginning and our end.

*But darling, won't you fill me in on that whole lot of middle?
CONTRADICTORY - n.anderson
by Natalie Elizabeth (Notes) on Tuesday, May 29, 2012 at 7:32pm

I'm disposable yet beautiful,

I'm discontent but content,

I'm ***** although cleaner than most.



Constantly I'm waiting for my contradictions to catch up with me.



I'm sick of life yet dying to live,

I cant get up yet I'm flying high,

I'm alive but essential parts of me are dead.



When will my head stop contradicting every feeling every thought?



I'm white but I'm black,

I'm quiet but I'm screaming,

I'm genius but incompetent



There they are again.



I'm happy but sad,

I'm ecstatic but devastated,

I'm constantly grieving but full of life,



Look at them all piling up like skulls in a pile tumbling over themselves.



I laugh but I'm in tears,

I'm lascivious, I am *** but I am distorted and putrid,

I am the essence of light but in the middle I am ink black.



My contradictions i cannot escape.
Forgive me
If my eyes
Do not deviate from you
It is not everyday they see such beauty,
Your voice drifts
To my ears like glorious music
You take control of me,
I feel powerless,
I wish you were mine,
To love with all my soul;
To give you my whole being
To be yours forever,
One desire engulfs my life
Your love for me;
Knowing you would give all to me
Just the same as I,
Overflowing with passion
The feeling so strong
I can feel your lips caress my own
Your hair as soft as the smell of your skin
Nothing worries me;
As your warmth surrounds me
This moment only;
You and I
The world aside,
Never ending; forever lasting
I feel complete; I want nothing more
My heart beats loudly; impatient, desperate
No worse prison that the one within my mind,
When I wake up; reality is there, it saddens me...
© okpoet
Too far away, oh love, I know,  
To save me from this haunted road,  
Whose lofty roses break and blow  
On a night-sky bent with a load  
  
Of lights: each solitary rose,          
Each arc-lamp golden does expose  
Ghost beyond ghost of a blossom, shows  
Night blenched with a thousand snows.  
  
Of hawthorn and of lilac trees,  
White lilac; shows discoloured night        
Dripping with all the golden lees  
Laburnum gives back to light.  
  
And shows the red of hawthorn set  
On high to the purple heaven of night,  
Like flags in blenched blood newly wet,        
Blood shed in the noiseless fight.  
  
Of life for love and love for life,  
Of hunger for a little food,  
Of kissing, lost for want of a wife  
Long ago, long ago wooed.
   .   .   .   .   .   .        
Too far away you are, my love,  
To steady my brain in this phantom show  
That passes the nightly road above  
And returns again below.  
  
The enormous cliff of horse-chestnut trees        
  Has poised on each of its ledges  
An ***** small girl looking down at me;  
White-night-gowned little chits I see,  
  And they peep at me over the edges  
Of the leaves as though they would leap, should I call        
  Them down to my arms;  
"But, child, you're too small for me, too small  
  Your little charms."  
  
White little sheaves of night-gowned maids,  
  Some other will thresh you out!          
And I see leaning from the shades  
A lilac like a lady there, who braids  
  Her white mantilla about  
Her face, and forward leans to catch the sight  
    Of a man's face,          
Gracefully sighing through the white  
    Flowery mantilla of lace.  
  
And another lilac in purple veiled  
  Discreetly, all recklessly calls  
In a low, shocking perfume, to know who has hailed  
Her forth from the night: my strength has failed  
  In her voice, my weak heart falls:  
Oh, and see the laburnum shimmering  
    Her draperies down,  
As if she would slip the gold, and glimmering        
    White, stand naked of gown.
   .   .   .   .   .   .  
The pageant of flowery trees above  
  The street pale-passionate goes,  
And back again down the pavement, Love  
  In a lesser pageant flows.          
  
Two and two are the folk that walk,  
  They pass in a half embrace  
Of linked bodies, and they talk  
  With dark face leaning to face.  
  
Come then, my love, come as you will          
  Along this haunted road,  
Be whom you will, my darling, I shall  
  Keep with you the troth I trowed.
By the fond name that was his own and mine,
The last upon his lips that strove with doom,
He called me and I saw the light assume
A sudden glory and around him shine;
And nearer now I saw the laureled line
Of the august of Song before me loom,
And knew the voices, erstwhile through the gloom,
That whispered and forbade me to repine.
And with farewell, a shaft of splendor sank
Out of the stars and faded as a flame,
And down the night, on clouds of glory, came
The battle seraphs halting rank on rank;
And lifted heavenward to heroic peace,
He passed and left me hope beyond surcease.
The pit of my stomach
won't let me forget you.
Every other fiber of my body
can't even remember your name,
but my stomach--
****** stomach--
sinks and reminds me all day
that my lips once felt your kisses,
my hand once held onto yours,
my cotton heart
once wrapped itself around
your chilly brain
and loved it.

But now I want you gone.
Out of my dreams,
my thoughts,
my stomach (****** stomach)
knowing full well
it's all out of my hands.
Most of all
I want you out of my poetry--
how dare you intrude
on this most sacred utterance,
this holy expression of myself.

What a shame--a ****** shame--
that since I once loved you,
you're now a part of me.
to ***** on the finger of my body

youthere

is a small blood

a drooping bead

           of(hangs



in fracturing silence)

twixt rigidly supple youth
collects(



                    A



                                Bruise




                                                  Slowly



                                                                     Larger



                                                                                                   )





                                                                                  a
                                                                                 nd
                                                                                the
                                                                              moon
                                                                              playf
                                                                             ully is


                                                                   slender




                                                                                            crescented


                                                                 wiggles



                                                                                           hard


                                                                     with


                                                                                           my


                                                                           fingers



                                                                                    tightly

                                                                               in
                                                                                         it

                                                                               SCREAMS

— The End —