You see when my brother was born
I didn’t like him crying
I thought there was something wrong with
Him
But despite all that after my terrible ordeals in
The 60s, Cronus made me an intellectual disabled man, but I felt normal
I liked the morning cartoons
And play school and Sesame Street as well as romper room
It took me a while sorr out my bowel movement
Anul leakage, that was very embarrassing for me and mu brother, just being a kid played with my games with his mates and I wasn’t playing it, I liked watching my fave television shows just like a normal kid, my brother tried to break my Batman mask after I broke something of his
We fought a lot when we had the same room, both of us needed our own space and I used to try and kiss all the boys but I only kissed 1, who was David turner, and when I wanted to watch the right on music program, my brother turned the tv over to the banana splits, which wasn’t too bad, another show we liked was the Mickey Mouse club, despite me and my brother watching, we bought the showbsg of it and all, we also bought the CHiPS, which was a show about two motor cycle club, and they had fake radios and I told the family I was talking to
The motorcyclists on the track and my brother no
Your not and me and my brother had two Fonzie jackets and I said Fonzie had a disguise and my
Brother said no he doesn’t and my dad said this Fonzie does and when mr and my
Brother were trying to get out of the pool,
My brother got out and when he couldn’t make it he pushed the thunder tube into me to make me not get out too, I had a friend Lyle who did things with our family, I played cricket with him and we went on a train and every time Lyle went to the toilet, he couldn’t figure out how to get
Out and I had to guide him out of the toilet because was my friend and I was having problems at the YMCA, because there I was my
Brothers brother, all the boys liked my brother more than me, it might be because I pooed my pants, but I couldn’t help it, I grew up and developed schittzophrenia

You see I went out in Kepler mate
To try and have some fun
And besides having a skate park
Ice skating rink and roller skating room
And bmx track there wasn’t much to do
So I went to the ice skating rink
And I had a bit of a skate
But the ice was slippery
And my feet were becoming sore
As the skates really hurt
But eventually I got the hang of it
And I skated around the rink
I know how to avoid hitting the wall
As I skidded right into it
I saw Kylie a friend of mine
Teaching the kids to skate
Each kid had their own little style
So I asked for some advice
Please show my friend how to skate
As good as me
You see when he did it
He fell on his ***
Which scarred him for life
You see it easy to do nothing
But that is the most negative **** to think
What you should do
Is enjoy what you do
Have a skate have a hot chocolate
Then walk around the place
You see it is a shame Kepler hasn’t got much to do
Because it is good to be happy and gay
You see I know there are many
Games that we can all play
You see then I found some snow
Where we can do a bit of skiing
Up the lift down the hill
I nearly slipped right over
You see I am not shy to try this sport
Who knows I might be good
And then I can skate to my daddy
To buy some Kepler food
I enjoyed the skiing and I try roller skates
Next, where I beat the champion at it
But Kepler is the place
That you could skate till your hearts content

G’day and welcome to Kepler sports club and my name is bimmy jarnes my first song is this crazy dream

You see when I lay down to sleep last night my head got many thoughts, of tackling sleep apnea yes, what a ****** it was, you see I tried to sing flame trees, but I lost my train of thought and I hated my version of working class man, it sounded as if I was a bludger, you see I really like to party, drinking this lovely drink, maybe this Victoria bitter for a hard earned thirst, you see I tried a bit of surfing but got a attacked by a shark, I ran outside the water saying never ever again and I went back in, the shark was still there
So I went to the beach to relax on the surf and I tried drinking heavily but that never worked at all, because I sat down outside the police station and they said c’mon we’ll take you home
Then I went to the club and danced with the teens, I wasn’t being inappropriate just having a dance, but the barman threw me out, I told him to get lost, then he said, mate you have no right to do this and then I did a **** right on the front of the pub and he said I am keeping you and he rang the police, but when they came they just drove me home, giving me an lecture as they drove, then there was a drunken man who really needed a drink and I came into another and used his money to buy me a drink, we got ****** together and when we were totally drunk and he was plastered as hell, I took $300 from his cash to buy 4 cases of beer and I nicked off back home with the cash and beer but after I finished the last drink I regretted it a lot, but wait a minute, no I didn’t he might have been a phedaphile, you see you see, that is what I wanted to do

My next song is my version of g’day g’day

G’day g’dsy
Welcome to my world
It is make believe
And full of drinkers who
Want to bash you up
G’day g’day
You could be gullible
So I want to tell you this
Let’s try and understand
Just one little thing
If you as dinky die as an Aussie
You would drink him down to the ground
G’day G’day
Using a ****** to have *** with a model
And then we say to him
That this model isn’t as dinky die as a eculyptus
Tree bring planted right outside
You see mr Robert hughes
He was a real mate of mine
Untill he molested his youngest
On-screen daughter, a real stupid thing to do
I don’t want to look at Martin fucken Kelly
The name really scared me mate
But when I hear these simple words
Of
G’day G’day
He was an Aussie
You see that he was very dinky die
So I took him out the back
And I punched him
Knocked him senseless in the park
G’day g’day
I am a drunken *****
I was saying to this idiot
That what he did was unAustraliwj
And he said, how about I do it to you
I went over to the phone
And rang the police
He said, what are you doing
I am getting you off the streets
Kepler doesn’t need you
So I picked him up and threw
Him in the bin and said G’day
And he said G’day back
And said this one little thing
Just say G’day and go back where you belong

My next song is I can’t wake up

I can’t wake up
My head is getting clogged full of apnea
It is wrong to think you have it
Especially when people think you are crazy
But I say no mate, I am not crazy mate
I am just a man who can’t get up
Because I can hardly breathe
I can’t wake up
You see I wanna drink a few bourbons
And show you the Kepler night life
There are hookers and strippers
And religious figures who want
To see their religion getting a lot of cash
And I say you are a stupid mess
You see I like this place
There doesn’t seem to be any wars
But the war that goes on in the pubs and bars
My friend, is really really bad
I can’t wake up
From this stupid bed
Because I could feel that Kepler
Is the place for me
To rest my weary head
I just can’t wake up

Here is my next song called living off an all night hot dog

I had fun at the club
It was the single party night
At the labor club
And the time was 1-00am
You see I went with my best friends
4 of them, 3 found chicks
And the other one didn’t
Because he was so gay
Not that there is anything wrong with that
And we got onto the dance floor
And half my eye was on my date
And the other eye was on finding
A gay man to go out with my friend
You see one guy said, are you happy
With your sexuality mate
I see you are looking at this man
And I told her, yes I am straight but
I am here to find a lover
For my gay mate
She told me, waste of time
All the men just like girls
Not that there is anything wrong
With being gay my friend
But overall it is a nice gesture
To help find a friend for him
But Kepler has a gay bar
Two doors down
Do you should’ve taken him there
But I will help you, so I need a hotdog
Will you buy me one
And we can talk about your friend
Oh yeah party yeah
On a hot dog cooked at 1-00am
Oh yeah party yeah
Drinking at a place that drinkers go
To celebrate good tidings
Then we sing 99 bottles of beer on the wall
Till the lady said
Sing that song again my friend
Sing that song again
I will come up and knock you senseless
Then you will say to me
Those 99 bottles of beer my friend
Were putting curls in your hair
You see I went inside and a man was talking to my friend, I went over and said
Did you know this person was gay my friend
And he said, I am too, I came here cause I broke
Up, mate with a Kepler security guard

My next song is my friend Matilda

Once a pretty lady walked in a social club
Ready to drink a few ales with the boys
You see she got really hammered
And the man sitting at the bar said to her
It is fun to see if will work with her
You see my friend Matilda
My friend Matilda, my friend Matilda
She is a lady that I love
You see I talk to her
In a club up here on Kepler
I want to marry Matilda tonight
Matilda said I don’t marry
On first dates no way
I am a traditional man
Who marries the normal way
Who watches both of us get plastered
My friend Matilda, my friend Matilda
Loves to drink on our wedding day
You see she gets drunk
With everybody watching her
You see I can’t my friend Matilda doing this
You see Matilda went to Alcoholics Anonymous
To tell them she has a problem with the bottle
But they told her the problem wasn’t her drinking
It was the problem of her shacking up
My friend Matilda, my friend Matilda
AA wouldn’t help her
Because she wanted a relationship
With a nice man
With a nice man
With a nice man on the block like me

See you next time I hope you all enjoyed my show
Everybody cheered as he walked off stage

Every night Paul berenyi and Scott McDonald came into Brian Allan’s house to give him sleep apnea and force him not to breathe when he is in bed Brian says help help, Paul and scoff have got me I am trying to get out of here
I don’t want this problem with sleep apnea, I want to sleep on my bed and not on the chair
Help help help I can’t breathe what are you doing you see Paul and Scott wants Brian to
Come up and join them, Brian said, I don’t want to join you up here, but Paul said shut up or I’ll dig a drawing pin up your *** and Brian says, I have a mental illness and I want you get rid of your 80s style of bullying and understand that bullying is ever so wrong
Paul said neh, I won’t leave you alone Brian because you are a little shy boy, Brian said I am not a little shy boy, I could show what  you do up here and say you are so wrong for what you are doing and mate, the only way you will get Brian Allan is if I die and that will be ages
I might be big I might be big but I do love life
And Paul said you are fat you are fat and whether you love life or not you will die
Brian said I don’t want to die, leave me alone and I said again I might be big I might be big but I do love life
And Paul got really nervous but still wanted to keep giving me sleep apnea and Brian said
Help help help don’t make me die this way

High living is the place to be
The life of nanny is the life for me
Doing knitting watching tv, helping poor people by having fun with them
Going for walks to the shop
Or around the block
And cooking very good meals
For the family
Putting the tree up
Watching Christmas parades watching concerts on New Year’s Eve and staying up on nye as well
High living is the place to be
The life of nanny is the life for me
I love her beautiful way she went through life
Even when you were naughty you will be in strife
I liked her loving way of worrying
Especially when you are with the drunks
She would think you weren’t very good
High living high living high living
Is the place to be
The life of nanny is the life for me
Cause she was a life lover
Like me
The life of nanny is the is the for me

I was singing in the 80s
Some really top radical songs
I was singing in the 90s
Oh Carolina and Macarena
I was singing in the naughties
Music that wasn’t in the charts
I preferring 80s music
I was singing in the tens
Music on the new young talent time
And some nights and we are young
Tim Minchin and I loved performing
In drama club and bing crosby and Kevin ****** Wilson with words that would not be liked nor
And Jenny talia Kevin’s daughter same thing
Slim dusty biggest disappointment and Duncan
And I sooner be a hasbeen than a never was at all
And in the 20s watching cool concerts
From all over the world Tim Minchin
Twisted sister saying seinfelds maistro plays the army mad dad it is true and Bon jovi with bad medicine and living on a prayer and watching and enjoying the Logies as well as sending Bert to his new life as a girl I watch YouTube family vlogs as well but I don’t give a toss what you think of me

You see I saw parents running on
The field saying
Get away from my son
Get away from my son
Get away from my son
I know they are just protecting their kids
But mate this is rediculous
You see this old lady
Who looks like she is scoring
Comes running out
Pushing all the kids away
Saying
Get away from my son
Get away from my son
Get away from my son
WHAT A LOSER
She needs to just refrain
From doing that
Just say, what kind of people would do that
And I say, nobody in their right mind
Is dumb enough to do that
Big fight begins at the footy game
Totally stupid people
Never should do that yeah
Totally stupid people
Should take the stupid out of them
And not fight