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My shadow being shadowy shadows me
and can probably see the same as me
but if I fall he won't catch me
oh no
he'll match me
exactly
and fall too.
Love,
fine and dandy
when you're in it,
but when you're looking for it
a guidebook might come in handy.
***
Slowly
easing
exquisitly teasing
the evening draws near

contacts are few
but
those I know do
feel the same about me

an arms length
amnesty

I wanna run red lights
take risks
I wanna
get you in my sights
race through riots

I get robots and
androids,

annoyed by disparity
I donate
to my second favourite
charity
which is me time
my time
no time at all

the evening puts
wrinkles on worn
out faces

I'm acing it
running and racing
it
but
need to move on a bit
faster.
Three wise men and not one of them'woke'
but they heard the angel as she spoke
or maybe the angel was a bloke
as previously stated
they were not 'woke'

some are awake and away with the pixies
now they may be 'woke'
or it could be they're plumb loco
but I don't know.
On the straight
just like an arrow
to find
the straight
is very narrow.

lots of jumping off points.
That waking up thing
has got to be the
worst thing
on April the first
bring me a
coffee.
Seven lives gone and only two left for Tom,
Tom as in cat and not jewellery
although I thought that might have fooled me.

Two being the double of one
makes Tom a happy cat.

I'm tired
worked late
thought I'd have shuffled off Seven
and moved on to eight
but here I am with
toast and jam
a cup of sweet tea
glad I've got two lives
though I'd much prefer three.

Actually
Tom doesn't really exist
I made him up
Tom's fourth on the list
of names that I use to
confuse
nosey parkers.

That's it
I'm done now
going to sleep
don't want my writing
to keep
you awake.
In the expectation of some conjugation of verbs
I walk slowly run to the window and look outside
on the street for some.
Grammar puts its spell on me
inaction cannot dwell in me
I look again to find some sympathy and all I see
is fast cars on the autobahn
****.
Is,are, a fast car,cars?
One down and four more to go
but I shouldn't be counting the days,

too many ways to lose myself
and I choose to not do that.

Trouble with numbers is,
they
give you a false sense of certainty
when
there's nothing to be certain of.

Some beads have gone from the abacus
which bothers us
(us pertaining to me)

Sally wears a necklace and those beads
look familiar to us and to me
I wonder is she,,,
but no
I wouldn't believe she'd take them
leaving me unable to count
past ten.

My eyes have sunk into my head
and my feet are the sailboats that
take me to bed
and tomorrow
it'll be three down and two more to go

always counting
but for now sheep will do.
I anesthetized myself
with
fifteen pints of Olde English,
**** good health
I'm going down.

But coming round when
the pounding in my head
reminds me that
I can't be dead
is a drawback.

Yet
Olde English sounds so quaint,
believe me folks and yokels
it ain't,
the locals where I live
give
free stretchers for the
wretches
just like me.
Catch up on the late, late show
or let it go
it's all been said before,

waiting for an epiphany?
a cup of tea?
a slice of cake?

take your time
take my time
they
take all the time
all the time.

After
when the lights come on
when the penny drops
and your eyes pop open
what will you be hoping for?
Fools?

Pack mules
carrying packs
breaking our backs.

If you think that they care about you
they only do
so you
can bear
more of a load

back on the road
backs to the wall

so
let's make a pact with those
things we have lacked
and fight for the right to be free,

you with me
or
with the
Man?
Dandelion and chamomile
peppermint and elderflower,
gee
whatever happened to
good old English tea?

What was good enough for dear old dad
is good enough for me.

You may wish and say
that there's no way
tea
is English,
I wish your wishes away.

What else could it be at a quarter to three,
but tea time?
my time where
biscuits and Earl Grey will
suit me quite fine.

At her time of life,
my wife would be having a baby
if I told her that tea was not blighty,
cor blimey
strike me dumb
make me fingers numb
if tea don't come
from England.
Wherever we are
we know that it's marked
on the map and we know too
that where we are is a trap.

we should be there
or elsewhere
somewhere but not here.

Some think a centimetre is
as long as a centipede
and some agreed with them.

Preston,
'the county town'
is in lockdown,
just
Lancashire
balancing on a high wire
again.
We always met between the lines where I watched ink form tears that ran slowly down your face,
I wished in pencils for another meeting place and made coffins lined with lead instead.

But we did I'd say and did it well
mused amongst the pages of the
times we had and laughed at those
we missed.

and if I live to see the new day come
we'll meet again between the lines
to rearrange the letters and
next time have
some fun.
We flipped small coins for fun
and like Apache arrows flew into the morning sun
calling curses on the day,
this was the way we knew.

Ceaselessly the air swirled round the sacred ancient hunting ground until we found the buffalo and John Crow said,
'better dead than being brave,we are the slaves of appetite'
and then the night of death rained on and soon the buffalo were gone.

Bones and stew make bedfellows too and this is what we've got
the empty stomach
empty cooking *** and not a beast seen anywhere.
No happy hunting ground,no arrows leased,no feast,not least no children born,no warming sun,harsh winters come and we must run away
this was the way we knew.

Soldiers blue and few we were
rifles,gunshot,
did we dare to dream tomorrow would arrive,could we,would we learn to live and survive on reservation land,live hand to mouth,or would we move on South to Mexico
where peasants till the soil and shattered spirits go.

This was the way when plainly night became our day and pipes of peace were smoked no more,
ruled beyond a different law
the rule of handout,get out,turn round about and cry
the way of life we knew did die
but we the children are living on, in stories told in elders huts,where cuts of jerky hang on skin lined walls and voices hush as the old one calls for spirits that he's known to rise
and cries again at so much pain and so much lost
and all it cost him and his tribe.

Describing monuments to men,is like paintings of the mists and when you think you've got it almost right
the swirling buffalo moves off again into the endless night
it's difficult,impossible,I can't explain except to say,
'that, what is pain but loss and heartache'
the breaking of another lance and one more agreement,one more given chance,
One plain speaking man of breeding
leading
his people home.
She's talking of millions and the rest of us are sat listening,
stories we hear when here on the tube,
her jeans are torn and her fingernails *****,
but didn't she get shirty when I gave her that look and that look's the look that says
I don't believe you,

But it's none of my business what her business is and nothing to do with me.

A wee chap with a kilt on and I neatly tilt on
my axis,
something I didn't want to see.

It's a bit to familiar or similar to a journey I took late last week.

Homeward bound and this hound dog purrs
the wee chappie swears at someone

a bit like last week so I won't harp on it
Just
continue to look sharp and sit
minding my own.
I got a clockwork mouse
and a clockwork cat
but
I forgot to wind the mouse up
and that was that.
Who doesn't mind a spot of rain
even if
it seems to have come by train
and arrived hours late

I'll wait for the answer.
Press the wrong button and you
lose all the work you've been working on,

emotional overkill,

Is that alright?
is what alright?

what I'm not doing!

forever walking down the white line
the central spine on the carriageway
and
Saturday's a puzzle

I am piecing it together
it looks to be a lovely day
but
Don't believe the weather
it's notoriously fickle.
*** it,
I should be on a beach
with a satchel full of stars
teaching
oysters how to reach for the sky
and
what am I doing?
shoeing horses for sixpence,

working for a pittance
is worse than the temperance
society.
I would much rather be with her
faraway,
she, with her hand holding mine and
daintily painting me with the sunshine
of ecstasy,
that's where I'd much rather be.

In hindsight
perhaps midnight
was the wrong time to tell her.

And now it's Wednesday.
She saves me,
but
I drown
in her eyes
every time.
Answer me this,
if
it's all downhill from here
why
is the going so hard?

I'm waiting.
It is not for me to be
for I already am.
There's a danger
that when you see her
you'll find yourself as
you fall in love.
Her fingers lightly trace a dreamy
pattern on my face,
she thinks I'm unaware,
I think, I think I know she's there but I
like her touch so much
I pretend to be asleep
It doesn't end
does it ever end?

Jeezuz Christ.

Do you call out to him
when things are grim?

or do you grin and bear it?
I swear
there's something in it,
but
as yet
I haven't found it and

time is running out.


About the girl
it always will be
safety and
security,


The night goes on
I worry on
it's not a
competition.

but the beggar in me
tries it on
and in a moment
the moment's gone
It doesn't end

does it?
Make your own bread they said,
oh yeah, easier said than done
when it's hard to get hold
of the right printing plates
and when you do the colours
all run.
From the lockdown diaries.
Tesco's jammed
Asda's rammed
Sainsbury's dropping
like ham off the bone

I'm heading home to the market town
getting down with the real stuff.

I hope the still's still there and breathing steam
into the cold night air
well
you've got to have a tipple or two, you..
(..they should have put that in Oliver)

Just gonna put a face on, look
a bit like Fortnum and Mason,
posh like.

If you're waiting for the reindeer
they're quite near and
just coming over the midnight sky,
Santa's a bit shy so you might not
espy him.

I'm leaving him a brandy, some socks
a mince pie and my electricity bill
what will
you leave Santa?
empty wrappings?
Crimbo trappings?

forgotten the rest.
Available?
absolutely.

Who's going to shoot
me a line?

This is a rehearsal
before the performance
I take my chance
and play to an
empty
auditorium,

Is this an audition
or just
a transitional state
I am in?

Reality never looks
real to me
it
must be something to do
with optometry
or maybe it might be
my ancestry.

either way whatever
reality never looked real.

Under the shadows of mountains
I watch sherpas who are all
wearing turbans
they seem a fine team of men
who reach to the top
stop
turn around
and come down again.
They work you until you drop
and when you stop
they dock your pay

I'm working today
it's a bit of a *******
if you ask me
but
they never ask me
they only work me to death.
Take me to the windmill
that revolves around the sun
let me feel the air move
as the music carries on
hold me as we turn and turn
and never let me go
take me to the windmill that you know.

Fastened to the gentle breeze with
filaments of fun
laughing 'til we cry as
we revolve around the sun
music playing moodily that just
goes on and on
turn and turn and
never let me go.

Take me to the windmill
let us spin in our desire
winding through the universe
we set our world on fire
hold me one more time and turn
the music lower still
take me to the windmill that you know.
To put my mind at rest
I have decided to sleep,

I might keep one eye open
to watch for monsters.
If I am to be the one you see then first I must be true to me
I must understand the inner self that holds my hand and guides me through this wonderland
where wonder is in what I see, I wonder what it is you'll see.
I see the man that tries and fails and tries and cries and tries again and in seeing I relive the pain which marks its passage on my face and in the face that looks quietly with eyes though tired still wide to see a man like me,ordinary.
I wonder what it is you'll see,will it be me with all the faults I am,will this man be what you see?
if it is I,I am to be your man,
my lady of mystery.
Pixels mix well with the ink
I am using,
fusing with pigments
to alter those figments
of these I imagine.

and to alter reflections
I
cancel out imperfections
to find
there is more
than reality
in things that
I don't see.

Her lips only bruise me
but
were designed to
confuse me
as if I needed confusing
with the meds that I'm using

fractals incline
and each shattering
refines the pain
until
they shatter and reform again
but
that's the pain of the kiss
given by this

and this is the molten
the dew from the
fountain
the be of the be all
the mountain before me
then four aces
the flush
a final drink for the lush

pixels extend and reach
the ultimate
end
or the pen runs dry.
When you're flat out on a ukulele
sailing in a boat of gravy
and the celestial warehouse opens early
but your eyes are closed,
you know then
that
it's just another wack dream
well,
he wore a kiss me quick hat
so
I kissed him and he knocked
me down flat
but my eyes were still closed,

and the Galaxy's melting chocolate into
the vacuum which becomes my bedroom
where all thoughts are binary ones and noughts
and I am still writing the programme.
I
have joined up those strings of which I cannot measure, wound them around a wooden spool, pulled them apart strand by strand, unwound and measured again, but still can't tell you how long they are.
Would they reach the moon?
possibly,
I have no time to find out now, the length of the string, joined, is no matter and yet somehow,
it is the string which wakes me in the night wondering if I might be wrong in not going on to find out how long the pieces are.
I wonder why I care,
the string is there,
I am here.
Sliced or diced
chopped or lopped
the string remains,
a reminder to me that whatever I am
I will always be
the length of a piece
of string,
unmeasured.
First things first
because that's how I rolled.

I don't like new things
and I
don't like what tomorrow brings.

I don't like new people,
I like old.
I like people who are stitched up
with some history,
sewn into
stories they've been told
and
held together with Sellotape
smelling of 'Wintergreen'

I've seen new
and it won't do.

Newspapers
are not new
we've read them
eaten chips out of them
thrown them away and
then they're old,
I like them then.
When you hear the ringtone,
the dialling tone or any tone,
put down the phone
no one is at the other end
there is no friend to chat too,
you can't get through to
no one there.

As a very young man,
I found
that tying string to a tin can
pulling it along and
calling it Fido
got me noticed, but
didn't get me any friends.

So I pretend
and
throw parties,
play
musical chair
because there's only me there

no need for overkill
just one slice of cake
to fill
me up.
In an orchard of apple seed scent
we spent time climbing trees
ate apples with cheese and
got stains on our knees from
the orchard of trees.
Boys do as they please and
we did, but they got rid of the trees
built a car park,
Now
kids climb on lorries instead of up trees
in an orchard of oil
they
do
as they please.
.

Do you wanna
dominate me?
take me over and
subjugate me,
in the clover will
you still cuddle me
do you wanna dominate
me.

She says, that one of these days,
she's going to make me sit up and
take the lead
the beads of sweat are
forming too readily
do you wanna dominate
me?
she does.

(make your own tune up)
wrapped in swaddling
which admittedly is
mollycoddling
and tucked away
so none can say
just who I am.
X
( Formerly Twitter )
Britain
( Formerly Great )

brackets
are a racket
they
can make a sandwich
out
of a
pile of ****.

Great Britain in
The Tate Modern
exhibiting in
the
retro wing.
Anyway
Friday's better than Marmite,
but Marmite's better than
Sunday night when you can
only dream of Friday.
A bit out of the blue
She,
looking me up and down
probably wondering
who the *** is this clown?

Happy Friday,
here's your fortune cookie,
I took a look see
and it's..
well, it's,
good.
The tarot pack holds me back as
I reveal yet one more card.


And from the Major Arcana
I have drawn the magician,
the hermit
the lovers
and
the wheel of fortune,

I could, given time
figure out the meaning
alternatively,
wait
for Madamme
to be rid of her cold.

I cannot be the Phoenician
I do fear death by drowning,
she calms me
with
****** and sweet tea.

We are the cornucopia
the thought that
where there's life in ya
there's always hope for ya

I pray this is so.
Referencing T.S.Eliot
he's dead so I feel sure he won't mind.
Words in my head. Unspoken Unsaid...but they slip and they slide ride out and deride bringing untamed desires to the fore. Words are the core. They are all that remain after heartache and pain when the world and its eyes and its peoples despise the lives that they live. Only words can forgive. But words in the head are impotent..they're dead. You can feed words to the starving but they cannot be force fed and thus words left unread.I've said it before..words are the core. Silent words are no good..never could be if no one ever could see what you're trying to say. Hiding words away behind a curtain is certain to obscure any meaning so when you have the leaning and you're ready to fall you have words that can call the words into a book to be read. Not unsaid but out loud to the crowd..to the throng. Is it so wrong to hear words that have love. Sweet Jesus above how could it be when words and their meanings mean so much to me.Do you see where this is leading..down the road of constant reading, with words and what they bring as they sing into today for each and everyone, until the day when words are gone. And that'll be a long time coming.
Written May 2012 and found September 2013 (on my website)
..and distance became an object of desire,
but some still danced wildly, impaling themselves
on the sparks from the fires they lit...

(passing this off as a Pepys)
js, in the year of another plague. 2020
I won't mention the rain
the rain that's hammering down,
I'll keep quiet about it
and hope that it stops.

I had to close the windows
because of the rain that I won't
mention,

the clouds
seem to know nothing about
water retention
they just go about drenching people.

Aha, I think that I've got it
maybe rainbows ought to tie a knot in it
but
I won't mention the rain
again.

She keeps me
Sunny.
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