Uno
dos
bingo,

yippee!
I won another turn on
Duolingo.

When I never heard a word that's said and there's a mandolin playing inside my head and today looks better than it did last night,
and
She says
'you heard me, right?'

it being that is not so much middle age spread
as contentment.

Past my bedtime
nigh on the morning.

sky still blue and
here I am
with you
in the pink

it makes me think
not all is bad.

so many people that I have known
are at that place growing daisies
am I just lazy not joining them?

Crescendo
I googled it
can't remember
if it hit
the spot.

Good and wholesome?
not guaranteed
not food
not drink
not even ****

we could starve and
halve the housing crisis,
start a new religion
find fights
we never knew we had
but
we'll sit here and contemplate
with two genetically modified
wheat cakes on the sofa

we can't or are not able
to afford a table in the kitchen
and the kitchen's in the outhouse
where the dog we used to own
used to roam
however much we shouted
'out'

and
we're like the home,
falling apart
needs renovation
modernisation
but the local corporation
ignore our pleas.

..and now it's Mumbai,
so why
is it still called
Bombay Mix?

Someone up to tricks
playing a joke?
I'm not lighting a cigarette
I
am just blowing smoke.

Oh
and Blackpool rock
is not rock.

In fact,
it's
not me
it's
a facsimile
which
most indubitably
looks incredibly
like me
but isn't.

Thursday
the big kid dredges words up from Millwall Dock which makes a change from dead gangsters and old Packards.

Mum says
don't go near the water, it's dangerous, but bath night is another kettle of jellied eels which feels a bit like do as I say and not as I do, but who can I complain to?

Ha
it's Friday and somewhere in the dark I nearly lost it.

To do or not to do
is that even a question?
well
there's a question mark
so
it's definitely in the ball park

and I note
that americanisms creep in
now and then.

Thursday night and I'm quite alright, thanks for asking, don't forget, it wasn't Covid that killed me.

Friday lurking
and
' by jove' I'm not working,

you never do
someone shouts.

and the winner is
not what you'd expect

we're not even mentioned in dispatches
now
that we've all been pensioned off.

to keep the home fires burning
we cut down Sherwood,
Robin was up to no good
robbing the rich to give to the poor?
yeah
for sure he was.

Rapunzel is selling her hair on
'only fans' because that's only fair,
it's a growing business.

but it's the taking part
or
the taking apart,
putting the cart before the Limo'
the horse had to go to feed
the hungry.

We're nearly but we'll never get there
Rapunzel is balding
she's sold most of her hair
Robin went Soylent
or did he go green?

these things you never think you've seen,
you've been them on the silver screen.
you just forgot

I could fly to Rome for nine quid,
*** me
cost me nearly that much to get to
Battersea.

Prices are wacky
and so are we
for paying them.

Are you awake?
She asked,
shaking me and
suddenly
I was
because
I had to be
to stop her
shaking me.

She,
picks her moments
like some
pick cherries
randomly
off the tree.

It seems so reasonable and yet we get so irritable
Weetabix or Sticklebrix?
that's all I said
when
She asked what was for breakfast,

So now She's having toast and honey
thinks I'm made of more than money
She bought it though,

I'd better have some Complan
they say it's good for building up a man
so
are compliments.

The trick shot
when the planets line up
and Joe Davis,
with his celestial snooker cue
pots the lot.

How desperate we were to get there and when we got there we found that it was more unfair than it was  back there where we were,

following this?
if so
blow a kiss to the ten year old
who's dying to be a teenager
soon to be an old ager
and dying anyway.

Hardly a sound
but for the squeaking
of..
.and here I was going to write old bones, but they're not so old that they can't be told they're not so old,

thank the Lord for Castor oil.

Aw jeez
there you are
crying about Armageddon
when you should be
listening to the beating of your heart.

Where do you start at the end
when all that you have is yourself
as a friend
and not a particularly good one.

Carry on?
I'd say so
the PC brigade would say no
*** 'em.

we're heading into the abyss
I'm thinking of what I would miss
as we kiss on the way down.

It's no Funday on Sunday when you have to work away to make your way,
can't even play because they only do serious
it's
seriously maddening and yet funnily enough not far from the crowd.

there
I said it out loud for all the good that it did
and as god is my witness
I will do more and produce less.

but that's for tomorrow
and today is for today
still time to play,
game on.

Making love
is making a memory
of how close
two lovers can be.

Google tells me that I'm in my prime and
so does Wikipedia,
hmm
prime is time for the prime and I'm still trying to process

if I was cheese I'd be done now and so would the cow now
explain if you can,

Prime as in primate man
twiddle your thumbs if needs be
I'll be up a Gumtree waiting.

do you happen to remember that end of term report?
No
and neither do my parents.

my excuses were hand crafted
teacher was sick, his dog was sick,
his parents were sick
so
I could pick any one and try it on.

mostly but not in the main
the excuses rolled out
but
tended to be the same
and
so did I.

it took a long time to
iron the kinks out.

The moment has come to shine,
not the silver because as we all know
that was sold off to China,

I was thinking of shining my halo
it's a bit dusty
rusty,
must he go on
said the man with the long face,

I stop for tea
we Brits do that.

There are the homeless who hide in shelters
sheltering from the harshness outside,

but when these shelters are full
where can they hide?

nowhere
but inside of themselves.

Catch 22?
you
couldn't catch a cold
and
when you can't catch your breath
you know that you're getting old.

Then the brain starts playing games
and you know this
when half a crown was two and six in Celsius
and Calculus was a professor in Tintin.

The older you get
the harder it becomes.

oh please,
keep your mind out of the gutter
I'm talking about sleep.

I suppose that the brain gets full
and when you age you can't pull
the Zzzees like you used to.

late
late
cancelled
can't wait

everything's slow
as if
no one wanted to go
anywhere.

It's because things are old
they haven't been
renewed
investors have taken their
dividends and
all of them thinking *** you
we're having it on our toes.

back to the horse and cart
or even the pony and trap,
it's a
pity I can't fit a carriage on
Pebbles, my trusty old cat

Don't be simple like Simon,
learn to make your own pies
and let the man go on his way.

It's 5 again and starting to rain
it could be raining all day
the weather is intolerable
designed to make us miserable,

I'm not made for this
I am made for sunshine
kisses on the shore
holding hands at sundown
and wanting
a little more.

The more it goes on
oh
..that's
what's on your mind John.

Facebook
trying to look beyond?

*** em up there on sugar hill.
what do they know anyway

you're blocked
and
*** you too
that is what to do
on Wednesday.

Hot summers
and what follows
is
short shorts

I used to wear them
until
I grew out of them

and I know
that we all have to grow,
but
it's such a shame.

Winding down now
got through it again and
please don't ask me how
but I did

got a glass and going to fill it
not to the brim
don't want to spill it

My feet ache
the
back row barracker
shouts
shut it
face ache

I'm not listening
but I'm
getting into the spirit

that's what the glass is for.

I was tiptoeing through the tulips
until I realised that they were parsnips
and that put the cat amongst the pigeons.

another dream from the countryside.

The night train,
you get on and I get off
woke at one
went back to sleep
and slumbered on,

only the elderly slumber
hoping their number's not up
and that they'll wake up,

I usually do.

They use lures to lure you in
then those fukers
hang you out to dry,
do not trust
politicians of any persuasion.

Einstein had it right
E=mc hammer them screwballs in tight.

vote for me
your vote counts
but sadly you won't

get a start with this party
we're all in hell for leather
well
vultures or whatever
we're gonna chew on your fat

have you got that?

you get what you're given so eat what's on the table,

I had a fork with a salt *** and a cracked cup, bruv ate the teapot, the milk jug and a plastic knife, sis scoffed two plates and both of them with floral patterns on and so it went.

Windmill soup if there was enough to go around
and scotch mist on toast if there wasn't,

if we asked Dad what were for tea
he'd say
**** with sugar on
wait and see.

But weren't they happy times?

Nucular
and that's peculiar
but them **** Yankees
got a way of saying
that's like
Gregorian monks praying.

you know and I know
that it's Nuclear
but
I suppose that's peculiar
to them
across the pond.

The difference is that there's no difference at all,
we're one and the same, but
we all play the game and pretend
in that, there is no end to it.

I am you and you are me
and the Beatles put it
so beautifully
but they ****** up
when they split up
and the rest is history.


It's Monday and almost but not quite there yet
I think that I'll get some shut-eye.

How ya feeling now?
Monday
wow
so soon.

back to the mill,
grinding the corn
they've been doing that
since before I was born.

I was in a dream again,
the usual one
I must have run out of
new dreams to dream,

The sky has a reddish tint
a hint of a fine day to come
I'm off to take a cold shower
I may be some time.

conscription
oh
well that'll work a charm,
but
there's no harm in trying.

They'll be crying into their canapes
snorting coke and in a daze
Whitehall's such a flamin' maze
a bit like the one at
Hampton Court.

If you ask me
that lot
are cut from the same cloth,
a case of Woolnoth and dead sound,

news at nine used to be fine
but now there's no news ever.
when was the news at ten?
tell me
when was there ever news at ten?

so many undone
we should be so lucky
*** me
we could even be happy

oh!
I am
and for that I thank
Mr Eliot.

Hellfire
and that was just a hot dream,

well
corn me in a can of beef
I am shipwrecked off a coral reef
best not tell her
She'll give me grief
I'm going for a shower.

Fact
today is Sunday
and I have to work
to keep the dogs at bay

and
now I know what the piggy-wigs saw
when the wolves were at the door.

Summer and it's raining
blood draining from my face
I need to take a powder
and
lay down on the chaise.

If only I could think up a good enough
of getting out of doing stuff,
I would.

there must be a limit
and I must be over it.

I'd crack on
get back on
the merry go
and go
but no
you have to fill in forms
submit to terms
accept conditions

what it boils down to is
these things that we go through,
are just circus rings.

What do you look for in signs, in the signs that the times are unending, in the days when the government is bending those rules do they go by the book?

if you're searching for an explanation
look no further than the next inquisition
and we know the meter's running
all the signs say it is coming

when
I'm going fishin' doesn't cut it
but it sounds like a plan,
so you shut out the voices
of the many-headed man
and with a clipboard
go shipboard
shipside
slide off the compass
ride on the point of a witches hat for comfort

want some bring some steal some buy some
every one a wrong 'un
even when they're mentioned in a
song sung
Sam sung
phone the council quick mum
pots on the boil
and the taters are all done mum

tea time
free time
no time to see time

are the signs that you see the same as signs that bother me, do they make you wonder what the hell is going on?

But it's Saturday said Piglet
and Pooh agreed, saying
it's
time to bring the bacon home,

suddenly Piglet knew in his heart,
that he'd be the start of Pooh's day.

Apparently
She's not coming round the mountain
She won't be coming at all
She married a man called Desi
and now they're having a Ball.

Whatever party you vote for
will never
hold a party in your honour

knees under the table
along with the corruption
and ******,
please.

She asked me if I walked here when I was waiting for the train,
I said,
can you be more specific so she asked me the same thing again.

I must be getting old because she looked like she was seventeen,

anyway it was another questioneer for the old folks walking here,

I wish they'd leave me the *** alone

Money used to be when your trousers were down to your ankles with the weight of it
and now it's all ****** plastic, you could flamin' well float.

You might call me a fool, but
I'm still old school with no cards and only cash
so
when I cash in my chips there'll be no plastic bits to scoop up.

that's it for tonight
I have a ***** and coke
not
that kind of coke in case you ask.

Two days off
I can barely contain my excitement.

I can still hear the heartbeat of the street,
and measure my pace accordingly, I
move quietly and carry a big stick.

there's too much being said about nothing
of which I know a great deal.

Happiness is not a cigar called Hamnet
that's its brother.

And that's as random
as my lottery numbers
god bless them.

We got to t'Skerton side of the Lune
and none too soon,
slipped once or half a dozen times
but not so much as to be submerged

we wuz minded to watch our steps
by them as had gone before us.

****** all on Skerton side though
so
it were off back to t'toirtoiseshell island
which were made of concrete and looked
like a submarine,

them days were few
and them as knew 'em
knew 'em to be
the best days of our lives.

She
plants a kiss on me
and
I grow into
a
kissing tree.

Too many people squawking
pretending that they're talking
I am putting my coat on and
I'm walking out of here.

And out here on the edge
I can hear the silence in your breath,
and that makes sense to me.

She says many things which have
a ring of certainty about them,
but that's another story.

Not the eyes
because they hold the soul and
if She has taught me anything
it is always the eyes.

You will return
because you burn for me.

And so adamant
that
I have written this on
parchment

it must be so.