let me tell you what's wrong with you
in position
over you

let me tell you what's wrong with you
as you drown
in tripwire and honey

let me tell you what's wrong with you
don't put me in this position ever again

i've had dreams that could never last as long as this
or at least i think so
so i spin in circles until the sun goes down

i want to sit here for the rest of my life
with the walls bifurcating and bubbling and whispering and

sometimes i just can't stand to look at myself

the tides have come for me
the lights in the watchtower scream now
i am carried away in a fluorescent red wave of relief

i am at ease
i am at rest
i can never escape

i couldn't care to remember you even if i wanted to

you lying pathetic *****
you cheap *******
you held me close
and peeled through my intestines like a tapeworm

our relationship was parasitic and
it is over now

four walls
companions
the only ones i can claim to know

nameless
faceless
truthfully, they are everywhere

but i am stuck in the middle of nowhere
misery runs cold through my veins

creatures cannot be created to destroy
they can be conditioned to do so

fighting battles over grudges i'd forged with myself
talking to myself on the sidewalk
outside of the motel

when the police finally did arrive i said nothing

travelers be warned
last flight to the sun
must have forgot my baggage
we have to go back
sorry

i am an orphan
until my organs function and my heart beats and my hands move correctly
i am surely made of glass, and through no fault or choosing of my own
have been abandoned by my own flesh and crumbling bones

i am a surrogate for someone else
i was never here

angles of presupposed superiority
in floodwaters i am thrown to you

torched the abandoned barn in the middle of the woods with you last night
you said you'd never forget it but you'd try and i said nothing to you

if stitches won't dissolve then
how will
i ever open my mouth again

if i was made of parts i could call my own, i said, i'd be a lot better
but i have no choice

i spend three quarters of my time with you
i spend the remaining quarter losing my ******* mind

i didn't come out right
i didn't come out right
i didn't come out right

i smile but clench my teeth so hard my gums bleed
i look to the sun to guide me
for presumably, i am lost
but a glance upward snaps my bones

like a bouquet of roses
dead from staying out in the rain

life as a means of the beautiful but lethargic aura
**** the colors you might see
i ******* see them deeper

and i have nothing platonic to say to you
i've been holding you the entire time
so break free

colonial hivemind
we are the active force
we are the agents
of our own pesticide

we are what's already been

tell me that i'll be nostalgic in your mind
an untold euphoria

sitting on this bench
alone

i got overwhelmed and got rid of most of it because i was overwhelmed

chambers
doors with no handles

only way to go is out
but there is no out
only in

i feel like i could have thought of a lot of other ways to tell you how i actually felt

i decided to
flip the table
smash the glasses into my forehead
and bathe in bleach

i don't have any trophies around here
and at this point i think i should

the key that i found
opened the wrong door

laughing as you cut your fried something at the head of the table
laughing
all the way downstairs

fear
innate and crawling
it knows me
it seeps in and out of my pores with everything inside of my body
it climbs out of my ears
anchors my shoulders and
weighs me down,
inevitably pulling me back
inevitably keeping me inside
inevitably ignoring me

i am a slave to my own body

you have
fooled yourself
veiled yourself
lied to yourself

fervent and unrelenting all
the way down

we return
to
our own
homes

a trap made for mice
fooled a man

rather than
feelings
we have
perceptions
of vague and thick reality

there is no conclusive evidence to prove you're here
there was nothing here that wasn't here that wasn't here that wasn't here

the unsolicited means to an end
as i come back for more
as i always do
and always will

pushing pieces of myself up a hill
with my face, bifurcating in reverse
and tearing apart my stomach

it is correct to cry out in pain

the doctors here gave me no option
they know it will **** me
but aren't able to tell me when
i gouged my eyes out in the hospital cafeteria
to save useless hours

sentences that mean the same forwards and backwards

sentiments carved into cracked hulls
my neighbors died too early
my landlord doesn't like cigarettes

my landlord's heart is full of *******

years before I was born are the most difficult to forget
and in turn the most arduous to forgive

I liken myself to a criminal
trafficker
burglar
thriving off my skin
bathing in my own chest cavity

each day I wake up
and my cells **** themselves
at the point of full collapse
my dendrites and synapses abide

when I look back now on
years past, things that have been said, or done, or not said, or not done

I realize
there is no leaving
there is no going
there is no running
there is what is left
and all that follows

my existence cannot be accounted for
by myself
or by anyone I've met

you
lined the median with
all of my mugshots
so I could revel in past failures

my car seemed to drive itself to your house
I came bearing gifts but they washed away in the rain

when they knocked on your door I had nothing to say

my arachnophobia sure has got the best of me today
the little ones are alive inside of my ear canals
and the mother is carefully placing her brood behind my left eyeball

i didn't ask for ice with this drink
matter of fact, let's pay it even
give me the bottle, give me a seat, and don't ask questions

well ****, the spiders really got me today
anything i put in my body they use in some way or another
all my meals only exist in webbings and eggs full of vermin in my stomach

i dyed my hair jet black in the bathroom so no one would recognize me
because i am nobody
in five senses
with tremendous lateral pressure

i was born with two collapsed lungs
i think my first breath is still trapped inside of them

pump all of this salt water out of me
it has stained the roof of my mouth and
alters all the tastes and makes it a task to swallow

my mind syphoned its way out of my ear canals today
and spilled all over the boiling concrete
it smelled like brain matter and burning rubber

implosion

if time bears no witness to what you have made it into
nobody can save you

i wore your grandfather’s favorite bathrobe
it fit loosely
turned the taps on and by the time you came back the entire house was flooded

she drowned herself
at three in the morning
in the pond behind your house

you had to repaint your house
after that night
she smeared her blood too deeply into the walls

the autumn flowers were already in bloom
early this season
i admired the sight, but didn't care for the smell

and as i walked along the driveway i remembered something you said
last night, entirely out of context of course but you said that everything happens for a reason
and despite the angsty teenage stigma attached to that statement, it made me think
i hadn't qualified whether or not it was true yet
but i wanted to talk to you

like a spectral odyssey from kitchen to upstairs to the basement
all covered in blood, like individual grandfather clock pieces, dripping in perfect 4/4 time, on our ****** linoleum floor

There is a reason for the fifth of gin in the coffee
There was a reason, but I've forgotten

A wish for heat to meld parts back together
I can hear you talking through the floors
to all your friends
and ex lovers

I can hear you singing along to nothing in the shower
The problem lies not within you
but in me

a culture too sensitive to exist
you should not care what people think about you because they do not matter

at least I now know we are not meant to last

I noticed it first on my shoulder
I woke up and spat it out
Vaguely, it tasted like you; like "it", but more like you

New haunts from old nightmares
Violent, ****** hallucinations govern the past
If history is to repeat itself one more time

had a little bit too much to drink there
might have held you down too long

as oxygen returned to your skin you looked at me and we said nothing to each other

had a little bit too much to drink there
might have held you down too long

as oxygen returned to your skin you looked at me and we said nothing to each other

your love
like worms in the heart
and bubbles of blood
exploding inside of me

we cannot survive
we cannot stay warm

pay no mind or matter to any emotion submitted from here on
because if you don't mind, i don't matter
and i think this pact is mutual

are you willing to sacrifice anything?
for that matter, do you have anything that you would want to sacrifice, or do you even have anything worth sanctification
i guess
is what i'm asking you

it must get hot and uncomfortable after you take your face off
and it must have been uncomfortable the entire time anyway
come home and take it off
who are you anyway?

welcome to my house
you can’t stay long and
stop moving around so much
it makes me uneasy

where are you?
we all thought you'd be here by now
we've been waiting for you
we are all, of course, here for you, no matter what

i knew i could catch a ride before they found you
all ******* like that, from the trees, with golden silk ribbons streaming from your hair

on my flight away from your final location, my eyes started to bleed
and at that point in time i thought that joining the mile high club might not be such a bad idea
it just depends on how you picture it
i suppose

Pour that salt into my mouth
Hang me by my ankles off a bridge

Pour some salt into my mouth
Feed me lies and insects

Pour your salts into my mouth
Don't ask why and continue on

Fill my mouth full of salt
Clean my teeth with alcohol
Make me realize what I've done

Drag your nails across my skin
Dig your thumbs into my eyes
Puncture my ear drums with your best knife
Stimulate yourself
Dress me up and
pour
your
salt
into
my
mouth

Make me feel that I'll never escape
Mechanize me with stabilization
and wash these salts from my throat

I am so sure you'll change the world with the garbage you incessantly spill.

I wonder why you care what they think of you, but honestly, I knew why before even asking.

There is no point in pulling the skin back if there is nothing there.