He's not dead
He doesn't come up for air anymore

He's not dead
He couldn't figure it out in time

He's not dead
He's right where you left him, and he can't move on his own

He's not dead
He is pulling the skin off his fingers like string

He's not dead
He is drunk and he is laughing

He's not dead
He's coughing up feathers

He's not dead
He's pulled out all of his teeth

He's not dead
He's not dead

I am not just a *******
At least I have some sort of control
I am ****, in a bag
I am contained
Throw me out after you finish walking the dog

the men in the walls are laughing
the faucet is dripping with the blood of our mothers
the names of all of the saints are alive in our mouths
and we want to spit them out

the earth is cold

May the river run red with my offering
I watch as the river bed overflows
The wind blows cold and strong

Seasons change
People change, sometimes

I can feel the cold
like liquid steel through my veins
popping out of my neck
as if to escape

I see the red and I let it take me over

Incisions on flesh to indicate
time, that has passed for
it is all that is left
for counting

Dear God
let me die now and take me under your warm wings
Dear God
let me tear down the golden gates of your empire
Dear God
the bed of nails I sleep on is growing dull and my
back aches in yearning for your pain
Dear God
what you have given me to live with is too much and at
the same time
it will never be enough

am so worthless
I see you in my dreams and I
want you out of them

Coiling and hissing
Pounding and screaming
"We've all been there before"

I've been scratching at my
wrists in my sleep lately as if
to let something
out