I am sick  
Not even the dogs fighting and playing
Gets me laughing anymore
I'm a slave to each breath
Controling each inhale
My hands with cuts on the fingers
The wind blows outside
But its quiet and I'm warm

Each bass line is a nuclear meltdown
Your lyrics come straight from the back of
pill bottles

It's a dream
Wide awake
The soft ache
At the base of my skull
And the point of light
Just a lamp to the right
Glows like the sun in my room
I shut it off
And lie in the dark

I listen to the shifting of the wind outside
And repeat Bible verses
As easy as reading them from the page
Theyre all the rage when I'm losing my mind
The last little bit of mind I have left
I recite First Kings under my breath
David Bowie threw me to space
And now its a race against time
A race against life
To see how long it will take me to lose my mind
I admit I have a problem
Called being bored as ****

Words mean nothing
Whether they are in the multitude or
alone



I will try again though
To explain how I am
The endless green sea but also
A single grain of sand

I stretch my neck to see
How the clouds look
On the sun's side
How they are gold and silver

The song plays
Sounds of breathing
Sounds of heartbeats

It is a short ways to your shore
Where the water is warm
The mountains are tall
Gods sit cross-legged
laughing at the universe below

Their smiles trouble me with endless peace
Impossible numbers of lips and teeth and fragmented nothing
"You can have the deepest desire of your heart if you only ask?"
...if something sounds too good to be true

Just then the trees turn into waving hands
The Sleeping mountains awake rubbing fog from their sleeping eyes
   Then they stand and laugh at my stature
Smiling craggy teeth as they step into the sea

"If you only ask?"
They hover now on golden silver clouds
Culling me with sweet melodies
Whispers quite silent or just loud enough
         to echo in unseen dark caverns in my mind

"I wish I had a really ace looking pair of Adidas maybe those ones with the glow in the dark laces?"

Under the banner heading,
a sudden rainbow spreads,
a poetic rain,
in small print,
fills the white sky page;

a naked woman,
reads it word by word,
ecstatic,
dancing like a peacock.

The sound of thunder
            is washing against
                        a sleepless horizon, again…


And while days
            and miles and minutes
                        and all of the waters of the North Atlantic
            separate your body from
lying next to mine,
            painting the perfect picture of
                        soulful symmetry that I’ve been
            craving to know for the longest time,

for even half of a fickle moment,
            if I can hear your heartbeat against
                        my ear and feel the warmth of
            your body against my back

and the embrace of your arms
            wrapped tightly around my frame,
                        banishing every insecurity from
            the corners of my mind…

If I can feel grounded in your presence,
            even for just a moment…

And know that I’m not a puppet,
            rigged up as a marionette by my own emotions,
                        strung out on bad dreams and decisions, they’re just
            bad schemes that I’ve never learned to fight off,
or dry off from these ******
            depressive states soaking into my skin
                        like dollar store sanitizers, leaving my
            skin burning, and my soul yearning to
be clean from the agony that others have
            left behind, I just want simple peace of mind,
                        so that maybe, when the sun isn't shining and the sky is overcast
            I don’t start drifting into the past,
and I don’t lose myself again…


If I can feel grounded in your presence,
            even just for a moment…

Then maybe...
            Just maybe...
                        The sound of the thunder
                        washing against the horizon
                        won’t keep me awake at night…

"Why"
is an agave  plant
raising its many hands
towards sky,
shaking in urgency,
as if demanding an immediate answer.
This "why"
I note,
it keeps asking perennially;
in tequila haze, I guess
that the spirit of that "why"
is that keeps me high
though the agave mysteriously seems pained!
"Why?"

I feel like your lips,
and everything beneath them,
belong to me.

I feel like your fingers,
and I want to feel your fingers,
on my lips,
and everything underneath the sheets.

I want to smell like warm tea,
and taste like smooth cream,
and I want you to open my eyes
to your lucid dream.

If you want to spend your time under trees,
I get it,
and if you don't want to waste your time in the same ways,
I get it.
But if you want to hold me,
and mumble ***** secrets that I don't understand to my shoulder,
or smile so that I can feel it on my lips,
then I don't.

We can eat the same food,
and inhale the same breath,
but no matter what happens at night,
it wont matter in the morning.

they gathered around
thick as the forest
calling her name out in chorus

I don't want any part of this
                           I once thought I loved you
          

\ you  whine and moan
about the big fluffy bed
a mattress of down          
and pillows velvet red

but the girl that i love
sleeps on hay
and she's out working
in the yard every day

You wear a pearl necklace
And great golden dresses
Banners of your name
Hang down like tresses

She grows roses
roses with thorns
her hair is plain
and messy and short

princes with names
I cannot pronounce
battle for your hand
but you only pout

...but she gets five lashes
                                   if the chickens get out

your tower is tall      
         You say too tall for me
your hall are great
                       too great for me
your tables are long
your gilded platters full
but you are still hungry
a lone starving fool

but
the one who I love
She is quiet and sweet
we share a loaf and some broth
on the side of the street
As your great castle glistens like a diamond in the sky
I watch her pick roses with a smile so wide