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feel lost.
I feel alone.
The feeling of complete brokenness.
I am empty,
Widdled down to dust.
My body is uninhabited.
My spirit is in millions of pieces.
I feel distant.

I wasn't always this way.
I once was filled with joy and laughter.
I once had hopes and dreams.
I once had a purpose.
It once was so easy.

Now its to difficult to bare.
I am now lifeless pieces lying on the floor.
Everyday is a tragedy.
I fall, I shatter.
Sorrow drips from my face like a water fall.
I am an empty shell.
Pain, regret, and despair is eating away at me from the inside out.

Then you find me.
You mend me together with gold.
I am now worth something.
My spirit is no longer in shambles.
I once again have a purpose.
I laugh and feel joy.
I contain hopes and dreams.
When I fall I don't shatter.
The brokenness I felt before is gone.
I am whole.
Thats what I am.
They tell me how to act.
They tell me what to say.
They tell me who to see.
They make every decision for me.
I am not independent,
though I would do anything to be.
I am going to go insane if I stay here.
But where else am I supposed to go?
They don't tell us about the outside.
Where would I go?
What would I see?
I guess I will never know until I try.
How could you?
Leave me here.
All alone.
I don't want to hear all you excuses,
Those are all lies.
Do you not see all the pain you caused me?
When I see you fear creeps over me.
I think of what you have done,
And worry about what you will do.
You left me here,
With these people I barely know.
You say everything will be okay,
But how can it be?
The past can't be taken back.
The words will never be erased.
The feelings you left me with will never leave me.
And for that,
I can never forgive you.
I see the pain in her eyes.
All the hurt and agony she wears like a jacket.
Everything is taunting her.
The sorrow is constantly nagging at her,
telling her to give up.

I see all the scars,
all the evidence.
The truth is hidden from her.
All the pain has got her confused
she says shes not broken
but rather she's bruised.

But what I see is a little girl,
who's life is broken because of this one man.
A little girl who grew up to fast.
Everything she went through is circling around her,
waiting to sting like a bee.

All the memories come flooding back,
but she tries not to show all the scars.

I saw it happen once.
her on her knees,
begging and pleading.
He wouldn't stop.
the blood dripping down her face as she looked up.

I try to forget the thought.
I try not to think about it.
The image in my head,
I try to hide it.
Won't let it show. my scars
That was how it always was with her.
Everyday she tried to make perfect.
She will try,
she will try hard for things to be alined.

Her life is ***** and spam.
For her,
Perfection isn't this far off thing like it is for us,
Its right over the hill for her,
Around the corner.

Maturity is within all of her decisions.
There seems to be no mistakes in the way she lives.
Sophistication is in her voice.
For her she can only step forward,
There is no going back.

A bitter world she attempts to make great.
She will try until the very last sunset.
Til her body gives her no more energy.
Everything must be precise.
She is a perfectionist.
She has changed me.
She is the only person that could change me.
Pulled me away from all the sorrow I have encountered.
She helped me forget.

She helped me remember all the good times.
The times filled with happiness and joy.
She turned this utter wasteland I once called home,
Into a lovely form of happiness.

All the tarnished memories she exerts from me,
She ripped them up and disposed of them.
All the pain and the tears,
Is no longer floating around me.

Now I am a warrior.
I couldn't have done it without her.
I am now armed with pride.
My life is no longer falling apart at the seems.

She helped me,
Healed me,
Fixed me,
Made me whole.
I was a phony,
a fake.
A wasted excuse for life.
I would look into the mirror and see nothing in my eyes.
I was another artifact that this selfish world has created.
I was blending into the world around me,
you don't even notice that i'm standing here,
right in front of you.
But I don't want to be like that.
I want to be a vibrant red in a sea of grays
I want to be something beautiful,
something pleasing to look at.
I want to flourish into a beautiful rose.
I want to be like a new rainfall after a lifetime of droughts.
I want to be inspiring and beautiful
I want to be hope for the hopeless.
But since i'm not,
how can I get there?
How can I stand out?
How can I make a difference?
Am I able to do it?
Do I just not see all the possibilities to change?
Maybe i'm just afraid of change...

— The End —