I long for that
Which all possess
Taken for granted 
But when lost
All pettiness forgotten

A cold loneliness
My only solitude 
Nothing for me here
But empty sorrow
A bittersweet silence

Yet joy alights
When they are embraced
Those who feared
What I am 
Become one

But until that hour
On that day
When all join me
I will remain
Forever Alone

You are the moon of mine,
Illuminating my prison,
An astral prison that I built myself,
To remind me your presence in the night sky.

You are the supernova of mine,
Unleashing bright lights like pyro,
Until it becomes the shape of a monster,
Petrifying but amazing at the same time.

Unfortunately I am just the dust,
Floating freely within the universe,
Struggling to be noticed by the moon,
Hoping for the light so I can be seen.

The sun's whispering to me,
"you are a dead matter" .

the days seem the darkest when you're in my passenger seat
you and me, two separate heartbeats
bare bones, headlights shine right through me
I look over, you're pierced blue,
I've always thought that I already know you.
but I don't know your life
and you don't know mine
quick to assume your dimensions,
thoughtless pretension
heartless, no question
refusing to fall for you,
I didn't want you to make sense.
but still your heart beats like mine,
and both of us feel like **** all the time,
with a past that speaks just as loud
and it might as well be foggy as the clouds
flashing like fireworks, then smoke all around
and you compare yours to autumn leaves falling down
lying awake, no trees no sound
no sleep no hands to pick you off the ground
no shoulders to cry, the same ones you sat on and reached towards the sky
I know what it's like,
to lose the one who brought you to life
cuz my best memories are in my dads passenger seat,
and I always promised I wouldn't cry,
because it's like he's not alive.
he's here, but not really
but I guess in lucky
and I'm so sorry that you lost him completely
but I promise baby,
this rain is gonna stop soon
and cloudy days like these will pass
put your faith in something else,
something that will last,
because you're way too good to give up yet
I wanna show you the sun
and how days can be brighter than the ones you try to forget,
there's more to all of this than darkness, loss, and pain
because there's always brightness after rain
and on days when you're drowning
and you hate who you are
remember you can change things if you just press on
so next time I look over, I want your hand in mine
and I want you to know that youve got more time than you realize
to make this right,
we might not last,
but you cant give up
these clouds are moving fast
remember whats above
lightning and thunder will always be there,
just remember this car will take you anywhere,
just tell me.
and ill be what you need me to be.

"when was the last time you were truly happy?" she asked, finally looking up from her notebook. making eye contact, i discovered i much preferred her nose buried in whatever she's writing.
i looked away to break the tension, but that only did so much. her beady eyes bored into my soul, trying to pick apart the girl that sat before her.
it would be an exaggeration to say that i never felt true happiness. i'm sure when i was young, naïve, and unscathed by the world, that i was a happy child. however, to be perfectly honest, i could not remember a specific instance.
in middle school the sickness started and grew inside my chest. concreting my heart in its paralyzing notions. it metastasized to consume my body, everywhere the darkness touched. blinded my eyes and deafened my ears to where i was left alone with it. and it owned my life.
granted, there were days where the sun had managed to peak through the thick blanket of clouds. and there were times where i would smile, i would laugh, i would forget about life for a while. but its presence was constant, following me wherever i went. when i would get lost in daydreams, it was always there to tug me back to reality.
when was the last time i was truly happy?
"i honestly don't know."

Following the stains,
Her only trace.
This winding road she was on,
She was walking it alone.
No end in sight,
She's losing the passion,
Her willingness to fight.
And yet he's following
The trail of tears,
Her heart drawn fears.
And the concrete is crimson,
It's framed for the crimes you've committed.
She's a wounded soldier.
She's limping and
Her stone heart grows colder.
Waves of memories wash over.
And still he follows.
Even though he knows it all,
Yearning to show he cares.
He loves her.
She's too afraid.
Too vulnerable.
She's a fugitive in this wasteland
Of broken dreams
And ripped seams.
She's haunted.
She's targeted.
And running from things,
So many things.
She's running from him,
And still he follows.