your voice is still echoing in my head
and through my walls; entire blocks
drearily sinking deeper into the night
as i shrink into my corner of this block.
i swear i heard you singing that song
that you'd been whispering in my ears
and that i've been humming; i don't know
the words to the music constantly in my head.


                                                           i know the words to the music
                                                          that i'm making up as i go along.
                                                              they're simple in their meter
                                                         and matrices that they're filling in.


i'd written you a love song, but you're gone
and when i see you, i don't think the words
that i'd spoken to you over the phone;
i think in the stylings of love that'd been forgotten.
it seems like they linger through to the dawn,
and they hang on every whisper that i still hear.
they hang around, never quite leaving here.
they're hanging on, and they're still so clear.

Our politicians preach hope
While our nation struggles to cope
Stacking woman into binders
Deaf to all but hired reminders
Treaties & agreements for peace
While riots rage on in Greece
Told that we are doing just fine
As more join the food stamp line
American banks engorged with greed
Planting in free soil a debt ridden seed
The next Great Depression has already begun
& It matters not which candidate has won
With our cancer ridden healthcare
Attempts like duc-tape to repair
Voting to raise the debt ceiling
An American father kneeling
Praying to God to find a job
While outside “we the people” form a mob
The 99% chanting in the streets
Stubborn legislatures don’t budge from seats
C-span listens to recipes from cookbooks
A dull murmur of televised crooks
Unemployment continues to rise
Prophets sure of the world’s demise

she laughs and my stress dissipates.
her love's taken my hate away
and replaced it with another feeling to anticipate;
the warmth in my heart heats me
even after she's left me here in bed,
dreaming of her more and more.
awaiting my awakening to her
in the cold darkness of my room
just one day sooner than anticipated.

this anticipation's leading to frustration,
although it's creating a deeper longing,
and this is where i know i've been belonging;
her love's my home, and i'm her house.
only built on the sands of shifting time,
sturdy and stronger daily as the shift comes closer
to sliding us deeper and deeper in love.
i anticipate the deepness of love; it's where i belong.

Tell me you love me
Take me by the hand
Whisper sweet nothings
Tell me stories of far off lands

Write me a story
It can exciting or put me to sleep
It can be awful or a beautiful creation
But write it just for me

Tell me good morning
With a smile or "my angel"
Start my day with a little laughter
Tell me I'm beautiful

Draw me a picture
Of anything or everything
In stick figures or perfectionism
But draw it just for me

Protect me from harm
From people and broken hearts
Fight for my love everyday
Like you fought from the start

Tell me you love me
Till I know it must be true
Make me feel special
And I'll fight for you too

Not here
Not there
               Not anywhere

No reassuring hugs
No disapproving tugs
No walking down the aisle
No disapproving my style
No comforting smile
Dad's been dead for a while

It could have worked if we were older
Maybe in a few years you'll lean on my shoulder
on that hill, both back from college for summer
and you'll realize I'm your guy.
Or maybe not, maybe we'll be back
but you'll have a boyfriend that you love
more than you ever loved me
and I'll be asking a ******* a date to a movie
I'll see you holding his hand and I'll
remember what I wrote next to your name
in my phone

"Always take care of her even if it means
letting go"
Yeah it'll sting but then I'll smile
because I know
that I probably love you more than you will ever
be loved
You'll never know that but
seeing you happy is enough

And maybe you'll see me getting a girl's number
and you'll think back to that summer when you
gave me yours
Yeah it'll sting but you'll remember everything
that made you happy
Then you'll grab that boy and walk out that door
talking about how much you adore his
brand new hair cut
I'll look up and you'll be gone
possibly forever but
I have you in my heart
I'll always remember

we tell our children
never to tell a lie
but that's all we feed them
and they'll be fed til they die
because the truth's too painful
when you find it in yourself
and even harder to put down
when it's come down off a shelf
in a bottle
in a lighter
in a song
in the freezer
under the steps
under your feet
under your head
and in your sleep.
you'll find it anywhere, once you admit that it's what's killing you.

May I have the honors of this dance with you?
But first I must seal your lids
For I fear your sleeping eyes will awake
Inside they go to cover your eyes
And me now you cannot hypnotize
Conductor with his thin baton in hand
We are the only two players in this band
He made an invisible nine panel grid
Two steps to the subjects left
And then two steps forward
He then gets up the nerve and then takes a plunge
O’ my GOD I cannot believe what he just done!
Dipping you now he goes in deeper
He orchestrated the perfect symphony for me.
May I please cut in and take this dance I ask
Holding your hand in my left like a violin
In my right a hollow metal bow
Bears also a razor piercing point
Clutching the handle I touched upon
All the major and minor notes
A five minute solo I played and deep within you
Preserving you all the more
That is what I am doing to you
Upside down bottle in my left now
And my bow now holds a clear hose
I see pink fluid now is beginning to flow
All over the damage now is where it all must go
Vapors now burning my eyes have just begun
When all is said and done
Inside again now I closed you
And it was with a trocar button
next time I close one
I will put a new twist in the  N stitch!
(CARSr. 7-24-12)