Apologizing

is difficult when you feel

so indifferent

I am the subject

of my own misfortune; the

idle passerby

you're like a prince
because you always
save me from my
demons. I have
so many demons
and they haunt me
at night and when
I let my guard
down. but I only
let my guard down
around you. some
how you save me
from yourself

If an apparition is all the gods have called me to be,
then I will grit my teeth and scream my way into eternity.

Unleashing words that few care to hear and tingles up your spine that some might think to be a strange and mysterious fear.
Being used to falling in the dirt can cause a dangerous smile to cross your lips
and most don't expect what they find if they take a peak inside.
Don't blink because I might be gone and the ones who light a lantern to search for me in the dark are the only ones worth singing to.

If I hide, who will search for me?
If I sink, who will swim with me?
If I fall, will you try to catch me?

Light a lantern if you care because I am always partly fading away...

Why are we so comfortable on your knees when we should be comfortable with ****** knuckles?
I will use the shadows against them.
No chain in hell can hold me and no amount of rain can drown me.
My lungs are full of ash but still you will find me when the fire is raging, running as fast as I can.
The abyss is what you make it, and I have made it a punching bag.
Use your whips and release the hounds,
but they will strike at air
and teeth cannot bite the heels of a ghost.
Keep pretending you are kings.
One day you will fall asleep in your beds made of all our dreams.
**but you won't wake up anymore...

The world is a joke and I am the punchline.
Let the rhythm fill your senses and waltz in time like a pantomime.
Puppets have no need of string and most will even dance and sing!
For who believes such
SILLY things
as string, yes string,
that controls the theme.
But in the darkness, they feel the sting...
Still shadows dance along the walls and men with guns will roam the halls in search of what their told to hunt but never questioning.
never questioning...
as freedom falls...

The rebels screaming in the street believe the paths beneath their feet, so I'll turn and walk away from those behind a self made cage and let my lonesome comedic soul fill with slight romantic rage.

lightning pulses through my pitch
strike me with your presence, stitch
the gaping ridges of the aftermath.

dark, is my prism.
weak, is my shell.
loss, is my repetition.

my gaze is shallow water
as the sun begins to bend.

when nothing grows, we hunt each other.
attempting satisfaction of the flesh, we eat meat.
carnivorous campers hiking through hail, we retreat.

parting clouds,
beams,
breaking through our moisture.
the rays build our spirits to cast
shadows.
evening arrives.

flames draw our photographs
and we're captured in thought.
candid sweetness, through darkness we fought.

today is the first rain since those memories
and everything I swore I couldn't feel last
winter comes rushing, swinging limbs,
swinging branches and I'm barreled.
all boxed up in the lack of things.
swinging gently before the snap,
my body descends
as I open my wings for flight
there's no surprise in my eyes
as the past repeats itself for I am
punished by gravity every time
I surrender to survive.

there's a dark girl I know
so beautiful
can't help but want a handful,
can't seem to help but get a mouthful
of words
all sputtered up and un-thought,
mostly stuff I thought I forgot.

I tell her my issues, my problems, my dreams,
she doesn't give me pain
no she doesn't give me grief
but she's twisted my beliefs.
reminds me I'm sensitive by letting me relax
without emotional tax, gives me love without pointing out the facts.

she found me two feet on the ground
and shook me, took me to the skies.
I was proud to be around such a daring creature,
I am proud to have been bound in such a brilliant gaze.

love is in all places all faces all things
but there is no substitution to what her friendship brings.