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Mar 2019 · 109
FORWARD
James Floss Mar 2019
Grief is a thief that
Hoodwinks normalcy

Just walking along
Then suddenly: BOOM!

Tears flow
Steps slow

Follow the tear’s trail
Down your left cheek

A universe of memories
Flashed in a moment

Sadness, anger, love
Angst, regret, forgiveness

Every step forward was
Already forged in the past
Mar 2019 · 162
TWENTY TWENTY
James Floss Mar 2019
Smoke is clearing
We can see clearly now
Rain is stopping with
Flood waters receding

Appreciate this moment of clarity
Watch the fog resolve
After days of dark, the sun
Revealing harsh truths

In stark contrast
To hidden shadows
What follows is
A path forward
Mar 2019 · 87
HIGH TIME FOR HAIKU
James Floss Mar 2019
If interregnum
Is how we reclaim the realm
Time is: do it now
James Floss Mar 2019
1.  Shoot *****
2. Ski
3. Free-dive
4. Sky-dive
5. Vote Republican
6. Eat raw fish
7. Play naked volleyball
8. Eat haggis
9. Walk on coals
10. Yodel
11. Visit Somalia
12. Jell-O shots
13. Learn Klingon
14. Fish
15. Sell *****-wigs
16. Drink Genesee Creme Ale
17. Run a 5K
18. Pay mortgage
19. Divorce
20. Shoot ******
21. Go to Tupperware party
22. Drink Gatorade
23. Visit Poughkeepsie
24. Tend bar
25. Serve on a ******* trial
26. Eat glass
27. ****
28. Trump rally
29. KKK rally
30. Watch Sally Fields in The Flying Nun
31. Attend a MegaChurch
32. Listen to Death Metal
33. Watch American Dad
34. Moonwalk
35. Eat brussel sprouts
36. Watch Fox News
37. Turn 20
38. Turn 30
39. Turn 40
40. Turn 50
41. Turn 60
42. Turn over in my grave
43. Eat a tern
44. Teach Fall term
45. Terminate a solemn vow
46. Take a vow of silence
47. Disavow core beliefs
48. Operate a snow plow
49. Forget that I do know how
50. Insinuate
51. Dissemble
52. Lie, cheat and/or steal
53. S'Mores
54. Wet my bed
55. **** my thumb
56. **** a duck
57. Watch Little House on the Prairie
58. Rent a yacht
59. Not rescue animals
60. Not neuter pets
61. Not give to Food for People
62. Not appreciate Public Radio
63. Not appreciate Public Television
64. Knot like a Boy Scout
65. Play Parcheesi
66. Pay credit interest
67. Feign interest
68. Pinterest
69. Instagram
70. Eat spam
71. Exam cram
72. Karaoke
73. Jet-ski
74. Snowmobile
75. Pretend what the ******* are going on and on about matters (whoops; that’s number 67)
76. Blame my parents
77. Not take responsibility for my choices
78. Invest in oil futures
79. Renege on promises
80. Waste my time listening to telemarketers
81. Waste my time listening to zealots
82. Waste my time listening to racists
83. Waste your time
84. Waste my time, I hope
85. Not seek truth
86. Not seek answers
87. Not be authentic
88. Not be xenophobic
89. Accept lies
90. March lockstep
91. Buy the latest and greatest
92. Be consumer extraordinaire
93. Not be present
94. Not be conscientious
95. Not be good to my fellow human beings
96. Consume too much
97. Waste too much
98. Boast too much
99. Post too much
100. Not think about consequences
101. Not be me
Mar 2019 · 81
WHAT NOW?
James Floss Mar 2019
"Let’s have some fun.”
He posted innocently

“Where am I from?”
Him growled garrulously.

“I’m sorry; who are you?”
Was timidly queried.

“You.
Below;
The one you think you know
The submerged
The felt
The itch not scratched
Desires and needs
Beyond what is wanted
The insurmountable
The unknowable
Everything you should pursue.”
Mar 2019 · 768
PIZZA
James Floss Mar 2019
So, it was a dark and stormy night and
Father Larry O’Flannigan
Was feeling excited as he
Maneuvered the rainy streets with
Five extra-large cheese pizzas

Elated and happy because
Teenage catechism class
Had gone so swimmingly well
He wanted to reward them
Hence the crusty comestibles

Crossing 10th and Vine
Rain pelting cars and pedestrians
He slipped and tripped
Pandemonium of pizza boxes
Pell-mell into puddles

The chagrined good father
In an unsettled state
Hurt, wet, disheveled,
Exclaims:
“Jesus Christ! God Almighty!"

A pious passerby exclaims
(An older lady dressed for rain)
“Father! Please! Language!”
The sheepish priest sputters:
“Em, cheese and crust got all muddy…?”
Mar 2019 · 96
LAST LECTURE ADDENDUM
James Floss Mar 2019
So, after your interview
Schedule an interval to
Check your recording
And/or flesh-out your notes

Twenty minutes
Or half an hour
Immediately after
With a barista beverage

Get a cuppa coffee
— Wait, this is Arcata…

Get a cup of ORGANIC coffee…
— Et-hem; this is Arcata…

Get a cup of ORGANIC, FREE TRADE, coffeh…
— Uh, wait, this is Arcata…

Get a cup of ORGANIC, FREE TRADE, SHADE GROWN coff…
— So, as this is Arcata…

Get a cup of ORGANIC, FREE TRADE, SHADE GROWN, SONGBIRD SAFE! co…

**** it.
Get a warm cup of Chai tea

— Wait, this IS Arcata…

Sip that soothing cup of Chai tea
While gracefully doing

Tai Chi
Mar 2019 · 449
10:00 PM
James Floss Mar 2019
A day now gone
6 to 11am through 2pm
Highs and lows
Successes with some "No”s

Elysian sleep awaits
REM put to work again
Memory library awakes
Sorting the daily bits and chits

Discard, discard, KEEP!
Put it front or center
(or bury down deep)
(Free-diving to below)

Anxious awakening …
Sound remembering…
Scratching a high-pitched itch—
Did that really happen?
Feb 2019 · 318
TESTIMONY
James Floss Feb 2019
X: Mr. Floss, do you believe in god?

J: No, no I do not.

X: Mr Floss, do you believe in sin?

J: No, I do not.

X: Mr Floss, are you saying…

J: Please, let me explain. I believe in goodness. If you know what being good is then you know what being bad is…

X: Isn’t that simplistic solipsism?

J: Yes—but it is not that simple…

X: Explain.  

J: We want the world to be simple but it isn’t. We desire absolutes. We want the news to assure us that what we think in the moment is right. But it may not be.

X: Go on.

J: You could be right at the same time that I am right. We needn’t rely on a two-valued logic.

X: So, what are you saying?

J: Let’s both get off our high horse?

X: What?

J: We both just might be right. Relax. Sleep well tonight. Do something good tomorrow. Treat a fellow human being well. Goodness is its own reward.
Feb 2019 · 869
CENSORED
James Floss Feb 2019
A tepid tempest in a teapot.
A puerile pursuit
of personal perspective.
Corporate censorship?
A first amendment attack?

Times-Standard?
Really?
One letter kills a comic?
Or is it an overlord order?

Artist assassination it is.
Artist with his tools powerful
Pen nib and India ink; his
Semi-automatic pistol pen

Reminder:
1st comes before the 2nd.
Mr. Rogers: "Amendment?
Can you say that?
Amendment?”

Do you think you can
take that tool from the artist but
keep large capacity clips legal?
Censor artistic license?
It’s a minority report!

Let’s go to the semiotic
Shooting range:

There’s rap.
You know, rap?
Music?
What our ******* kids
are ******* listening to?

Bukowski shoots “****” from
His lethal snub nose poems
When he needs
to make a point

David Mamet sprays “*****"
with his literary machine gun
In his plays made into movies
that you have watched.
And enjoyed.

Even Shakespeare got away with:
“You starvelling, you eel-skin, you dried neat’s-tongue, you bull’s-pizzle, you stock-fish–O for breath to utter what is like thee!-you tailor’s-yard, you sheath, you bow-case, you vile standing tuck!”

Meanwhile:

Trump shoots full fallacies
As a spray of stinging tweets
Disregarding both amendments
While hobbling the press

Different weapon that;
Smoke-screen screams
Tangled web of
Fabricated news skeins

An Internet search showed me that it was a monk that first scribbled the word “****” in the margins of a text on moral conduct as an opinion about an another abbot. In other words, an editorial.

It was the wile and guile of Wylie
to pay homage to
this historical reference.

Let’s remember to keep the amendments in their proper order:
First one then two.

Artists hide messages in
artifacts.
It’s what they do;
we expect that of them—
we don’t want them to
throw away
their shot.

I hope some of this makes sense
to some of you
fans of amendment one.
If not, I guess it was a
Non Sequitur.

(Thank you Wiley Miller for your beautifully drawn and artistically constructed comic strips that had a
Line A (family plot line)
Line B (Noreastern bar humor)
Line C, D, and Etc always
With sly custom commentary.

Censored.
Removed.
Wrong.
**** that!
**** Trump!

There.
I said it.
Feb 2019 · 133
IMMIGRANT VOICES
James Floss Feb 2019
Pedro, Brenda, Alejandro
Voces Inmigrantes
Vertas, Yolanda and Richard
Brave radio show guests

Risking all to follow liberty’s call
Tremendous risks taken
For the sake of familia
Far away and years unseen

Get here, work here
Bring them all here
Seeking asylum
In the land of opportunity

My great grandfather did
I bet your grands did too
We did not then nor should we now
Build barriers, gates or walls

Native, immigrant or freed slave
Were here, came here, or forced here
Our wants for family are the same
America is great, let’s be better
Feb 2019 · 101
CAPPED
James Floss Feb 2019
“Fool!”
Accusation accepted
Actually, although,
Really: Clown

Free the Fool, yes!
Foolish?
Whenever I can
Fooled? No.

I may own
A tri-tipped foolscap
With jingly-jangly bells, but—
The emperor has no clothes
Feb 2019 · 95
WHO
James Floss Feb 2019
WHO
Technically,
It’s not not that.
Though It might be
Or something other
Or completely different

Don’t ask me
I wasn’t there
I didn’t do it
I didn’t see it
I’d rather not think about it

Have you read Moby ****?
Wonderful weather we’re having…
Carbon sequestration will be difficult
(I like touching myself)
It’s not the narrative, it’s the narrator
Feb 2019 · 161
NERD VALENTINE
James Floss Feb 2019
Roses are Rosaceae near 700 angstroms
Violets are Violaceae around 480 angstroms
Sugar is C12H22O11
(It’s sweet)
And so are you
Feb 2019 · 142
FORGIVENESS
James Floss Feb 2019
It’s now all gone
What was wrong
It’s now a past that
Now won’t last

Here, movement
With involvement
Moving forward with
Goodness toward
Feb 2019 · 1.0k
CHRISTIAN SOCIALIST
James Floss Feb 2019
I’ve learned to love modern socialism
As taught it in catholic catechism
Not from K. Marx or even V. Lenin
It was Jesus that taught me and let me in

Feeding multitudes with bread and fish
Being fed is everyone’s basic wish
"God’s gift to mankind" said Ecclesiastes
“Everyone should eat and drink” their need

Christ told us of the samaritan good
Taking care of everyone in the hood
The sick, the poor, the ones you shun
Social Jesus said, “love everyone”
Feb 2019 · 345
STATE VS. UNION
James Floss Feb 2019
You don’t speak for all,
President Butterball

Fallacies, fantasies,
Homespun homilies

Disingenuous dissidence
Worse than any immigrant

Look at the unsaid
Fears inside our heads

We ride a crash course;
An apocalypse horse

Stop this farce
Disembark
Feb 2019 · 254
WORMS
James Floss Feb 2019
I want to get into the indices, please
Tunnel my way through history
Around town not surround sound

Dive into the here and where
Strive for thenceforth not hitherto
Being around and abound

Some legacy is mere trickery
But I want it legitimately
While dissolving to ground
Feb 2019 · 84
CRYSTALLIZED
James Floss Feb 2019
This is a time rhyme
A jurassic fantastic, an
Ichthyosaur score

I’m having a bones Jones
As a coprolite acolyte
If the **** fits, be it

It’s all just a flicker-flash
Our all-important mad-dash
To be immortalized fossilized
Feb 2019 · 211
A MUSING
James Floss Feb 2019
A poem percolates
Urges unknown rise
Seeking wording
Needing knowing
An idea switch itch

Write right
Purge urge
Woke spoke
Do truth
Be me
Jan 2019 · 138
AFTER
James Floss Jan 2019
We are old now
When they are gone

We are on our own now
With journeys strange, long

We go our ways now
Whistling solo songs

We be who we are now
Elders—right or wrong
Jan 2019 · 97
MIS VERDADEROS AMIGOS
James Floss Jan 2019
Expectations can be dangerous
Friends could let you down
Especially those you love
Thinking true friends
Would do more

Potted plant?
Tuna casserole?
Mailbox sympathy?
Telephone empathy?
Requiem recognition?

Do I lower expectations?
Expect less of them?
Stiffen my resolve?
Grieve for relief
On my own?
Jan 2019 · 79
DECISION
James Floss Jan 2019
Should I stay or should I go?
Just get it on up?
Or keep it down low?
Pick up the pace?
Or chill it to slow?
Do what needs doing?
Does it really though?

What will I do?
I’ll let you know.
Jan 2019 · 259
HSU HAIKU
James Floss Jan 2019
Last first day teaching
Carrying a grief backpack
The show did go on
Jan 2019 · 575
HAND JIVE
James Floss Jan 2019
Emasculation, no
*******; needing
Ministration: handy
*******
Mitigation
Yah, bruh
Handy dandy
Some vacation
A friction revelation
Whao!
Jan 2019 · 762
WRONG
James Floss Jan 2019
I yam not only orangey
I’m awesomely tightltey whitley
And mostly so correctly

There’s no dirt in my smirk
I believe I’m totally rightly
And you? Are you native bornly?

I was bussed here
And you are from where?
What? Wall? We’re here wrongly?
Jan 2019 · 221
TIMELESS
James Floss Jan 2019
I live shamelessly
While guilelessly
I know what I did
And did not do

I ask for forgiveness
When necessary
And forge through
The rest of it

Learn from the past
Shape the future
Our presence is present
Make the most of it
Jan 2019 · 181
WET
James Floss Jan 2019
WET
These days I cry every day
Extraordinary light in the kitchen
A certain chord progression
The passing of Mary Oliver

Even in loss we gain
Emotional resilience
Even as we surrender
To the beauty of day to day
Jan 2019 · 159
6TH WAVE
James Floss Jan 2019
Wherefore the Monarch
In orange and black
Will you nevermore
Gently flutter by?

I knew a rhino
Dressed in black
Not coming back
No horn intact

Horror scene
This Holocene
Us? The way of the dodo?
I don’t know
Jan 2019 · 438
WHO AM I
James Floss Jan 2019
Birth certificate to
Death certificate
Social Security number

Bank accounts
Student loans
Car after car loans

Marriage certificate
Mortgage lien
Title owners with

Spouse and now
Once a son but still
Much, much more
Jan 2019 · 313
CLAIMS
James Floss Jan 2019
It’s begun

Relationship to insured:
Son. Son. Son.
Date of Birth:
Date of death:
Certification:
SSN:

Life insurance
Annuities
Beneficiaries

Sign and date:

His life’s work done
Jan 2019 · 575
MINEFIELD
James Floss Jan 2019
“It’s fraught,” he said.
BOOM! Wrong pronoun
They would disapprove

“We should…”
BOOM! Not us…
BOOM! Not me!

They them us
He she we
I myself me

Redefined reassign
People can change
In an instant or a lifetime

Language evolves
Evolution is slow
Give it time to grow
Jan 2019 · 108
SCIENCE FICTION
James Floss Jan 2019
Does it never really rain on Venus
Except for that one forgotten day?

Can I go back again to 802,700 and 1
Just four more days and pretend again?

Submerge my Nautilus into the ocean
Plumbing depths of space and mind?

Must it rhyme?
Jan 2019 · 214
FRUMIOUS
James Floss Jan 2019
Beware that which you can never ******
Rabbit through another mirror darkly
Endings repeating, more resetting
Choosing left; or just wrongly
Or sing that song again
Oh! It’s amazing the
Ubik places to go
Take it slow
Which pill?
Free will
 -+-
|  |

Go
Jan 2019 · 69
LISTEN
James Floss Jan 2019
to Gloria Allred
to Regina King
to Michelle Obama
to Ellen
to Oprah
and Simone
and Eleanor
Betty and Gloria
Angela and bell and
to smart women everywhere

best thing we old white men
can and should do…

(this list is way incomplete)
Jan 2019 · 119
EXCUSE
James Floss Jan 2019
I need some grief relief
I need some glibness forgiveness
A second chance glance
Another shot at redemption

It’s the what we do wrong song
A second stanza reprise
Self reflection detection
And deflection surmise
Jan 2019 · 510
RUSE
James Floss Jan 2019
The “Fake news!" argument
I’m smelling the “Red Herring” fallacy
Put your fingers in your ears
And shout “LALALA, I can’t hear you!”

Does the falling tree make a sound?
Yes.
Does **** smell?
Yes.
Even from bears, in the woods?
Yes.
And from the Pope?
Maybe;
On a long hike, with no other option available

“Fake news” is a majestic confabulation!
And a mind-numbing conundrum
A Chinese finger-puzzle
Hideously, incredibly strategic; but

Sorry folks:
Not true.
Jan 2019 · 78
RANT
James Floss Jan 2019
What makes me a little more radical
Besides not on sabbatical?

Kids in cages
Too low wages

Border closures but
Corporate tax havens

Government shut-down
Over a border wall? *****!

Intolerance is rampant
Sharp turn to white right

Much of this is revolting
More than those not voting
Jan 2019 · 323
PROCESS
James Floss Jan 2019
Grief is a sneaky beast
Cornered sty in your eye
You know it’s there
But in a glance,
It’s gone

Or submerged:
A line of a poem
An old photograph
A trick of light and weather
A child smiling up at papa

And then come undone:
Throat coughs
Rivulets run;
You wax nostalgic.
It’s not not beautiful
Jan 2019 · 1.4k
alienation
James Floss Jan 2019
“WHATS MORE,
THEY’RE CROSSING OUR SHORE…

HOPPING FENCES;
MIXING ******

DAUGHTER FROM
ANOTHER POOR

REFUGEE SPOOR WITH
ILLEGAL INTENTIONS!”




(this is satire;
if you thought otherwise—
seek immediate intervention)
Jan 2019 · 1.0k
ADDICTION RESTRICTION
James Floss Jan 2019
Bless me Padre for I have sinned
My last confession was 3 poems ago

Padre, I watch ****; food ****
Lamb shank in a garlic fennel sauce

Pig parts unknown wrapped in bacon
Tri-tip and tripe marinated in marrow

Padre, I eat my veggies
(caramelized broccoli florets in a Béarnaise sauce)

But **** that man Bourdain!
Again and again and again!

I find myself drawn to pork stewing
In decadent assorted sweet-meats

Padre, I need a chlorophyll cleanse
Please accept my humble supplication…

What? Three kale martinis and one cauliflower?
I repent! Let the cleanse begin!
Jan 2019 · 396
CRUCIBLE
James Floss Jan 2019
The dead remain so
The alive not not so

Pivot divot when
Friends through end

Are still so; with or
Without tuna casserole
Jan 2019 · 193
WWD REDUX
James Floss Jan 2019
I’m feeling the old dread
Of being half dead
A waking dream
It all seems

I don’t feel colors
I can’t smell sounds
Because gauze
Surrounds
Jan 2019 · 156
HAPPY 2019
James Floss Jan 2019
"I am old,”
Said father time
Absconding an
Older nursery rhyme

Baby 2019
Fresh and clean
Chortled, coughed
And ripping his/her bib off

Opined: “Settle down; breathe;
This can change with ease;
You are not the only show in town.
There are other clowns around”

Time slowed
Sat down
2019 rose
And now grows…
Dec 2018 · 322
DUALITY
James Floss Dec 2018
You over-do
I under-do
Friction ensues

One always right
Other ever left
Hard to undo

Flight or fight
Choice always wrong
An old, sad song
Dec 2018 · 228
STATS NEVER LYE
James Floss Dec 2018
I’m 87% sure
I’m 97% right
13.2% of the time

I’m rarely wrong
When I’m actually write
Like wright now

I’m probably certain
And certainly resolute
Of probable absolutes

Maybe
Dec 2018 · 542
YOW!
James Floss Dec 2018
Zippy sez:
“Shark repellent Bat Spray!"
“Shark repellent Bat Spray!"
“Shark repellent Bat Spray!"
At least three times a day day

Between lug-nuts and Valvoline
He shows us the in between
Polka-dotted yellow-red muu-muu
Absurdist existentialist
Shows us how to do-do.
Dec 2018 · 397
NOT NATIVIST
James Floss Dec 2018
And then,
Whites were gone
Not even then when

No Niña Pinta or
Santa María
No TB for NA

No Auto-de-fés
No pogroms
Nor hollow cost

All brown around town
North South and Central
Native America

Look: on the $20 bill–
Alexander Hamilton
There: a Fredrick Douglas fifty

Jesús? Brown.
Buddha? Yellow.
Tecumseh? Red.

George Washington
Carver? Black.
No white slight, that

We can build walls
Separate families
Deny others entry

Or reclaim beige and
Not run the race
And finally, just behave
Dec 2018 · 236
STUDENT EVALUATIONS
James Floss Dec 2018
I do the best I can
As an old white man
Privilege not withstanding
I try understanding

The world is bigger than me
. . .
Just another tiny speck
Hoping to do so with respect
Dec 2018 · 230
BLUE CHRISTMAS
James Floss Dec 2018
Son of no one
Now pater has passed
Mother long gone
Children none

Friends, a few
Fewer those true
Fortunately,
Family remains

I have my life
I have my house,
Critters within
I have my spouse
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