This distorted chaotic web of lies that is somehow life sickens me.
I wish nothing but the worst for the people who did and planned this mess.
But that doesn’t stop the burdens that you people put onto others, or your snide powertripping personas. What’s left of life is a hoax. And as long as you people play god, the devil or whatever the hell it is, life will be tarnished and there will be nothing left but this stupid conspiracy that the entitled and selfish caused. So to you all, here’s one last *******.

The parasites never stop feeding.
It's their lies that are misleading.
No truth in this petty plot.
So far past distraught.
I hope you all ******* rot.

Filled up with hate.
I wish I could escape.
For these horrendous feelings?
I wish I could shake them.
But this is all so deranged,
On the weak they play.
I guess it’ll always be a never ending game.
Cause all anyone does is drive me to going insane.

With all the parasites feeding on my life, I want to end it all and let their petty torment lead their throats to the knife.
I can’t take their plans and this isn’t where I want to stand.
And with their blinded eyes and minds this makes an impossible hand. But that doesn’t stop me from wanting to demolish them for their demands. So ******* all and your selfish plans. This isn’t life. It’s a contorted hoax of you peoples corrupted hands.

When your mind keeps creeping back into the dark, how do you know whether to end or restart.
I guess my minds playing tricks on me.
People make living life look like they do it so easily.
So maybe my heads just up in the clouds.
I'm just trying to get away from here, please let me find my way out.
Not a face I know well I can say I can trust.
If only I could get up and figure out how to adjust.

All there is to this life is lies.
Leading to whoever they prey on’s demise.
So why doesn’t anyone have more time?
If this is life then nothing will ever be fine.
So as I try to cage the demons in my head,
I’ll hope that whatever comes next doesn’t end with more dread.

When will this lifetime of suffering end?
Sometimes it seems good but still nothing ever ends.
They give me a break just to go back at it again.
I guess this is why with none of this going on I’ll never make amends.
Why is this all crashing down and rearranging?
It’s always me whose changing.
Why can’t I just figure out who the hell I am?
But the masquerade never really seems to stop so I guess I know where I stand.
What’s with all of these demented plans?
It wasn’t me who set out all of these bad hands.
I can’t escape the torment and my life feels hell sent.
so why are people so horrible and crude.
My whole existence is so misconstrued.
I guess that’s why I never know what to do.
If only I could figure out who I truly am so I can find my shoes.

What's left in this unfortunate string of events?
It's not only me who knows that nothing is left.
As things keep changing and i still can't see.
I find that i'm becoming less concerned with something i can keep.
So **** finding meaning.
**** everyone who's nothing but deceiving.
It's me who just wants to leave.
Be done with this petty *******, i need new scenery.
I guess i'm speaking with a little hostility.
But i know that's not truly me.
How do i breathe some life into this corpse i've been dragging around?
I'm on my last whim, so i guess i'll just have to get used to the sound.
So as i hope this life can breathe some life into those who feel despair.
I'll hope that the end isn't too brutal while i continue to breathe this last bit of air.

Did people lose the ability to use their brains?
It’s a petty web of lies with their ******* games.
They use logic to lie, and common sense to corrupt.
Wasn’t ruining my life already enough?
But no you have to **** me by any means you see fit.
I’ve had it with you people and all of this contorted *******.
But wait the problem is always me.
How many times are you going to use my soul and disorders for your power tripping greed?
So I guess the problem was always all of you.
You get no satisfaction and only murky hues.
Thanks for the 2 years I thought life was good.
But everything else was torment and now all you want is blood.
Well if I could **** you all to hell and make sure you consecutively rot and burn, for all this demented slavery all taking turns.
I’d torture you all to death and make sure you’d never live again.
Stop bringing me back just to **** me over, or is your ruining the quality of life a trend?
You all deserve the worst, hell wouldn’t even make a dent.
So why are you people so awful?
I guess it’s cause your like a cult.
I could never insult any of you enough, leave me out of your ******* and stop making everything my fault.

It seems the masquerade has turned into an alliance.
Is there hope for a better day? They’ll always deny it.
I need to escape their slimy grasp.
And find any kind of happiness with the potential to last.
But things are crashing down right before my eyes.
All that’s left are their disguises and lies.
So as I try to get out of the crossfire, I’ll hope that things don’t get too dire.
As I hope my time doesn’t expire.

It seems i have a distorted way of thinking.
No matter how badly i want to be worthy of love,
I just feel so ******* worthless.
I probably am, since you broke me.
I've been trying to be who i was before you tore my heart out of my chest.
But i'm too far gone, past the point of just a mess.
Am i even a person anymore?
I guess biologically speaking, but the depth of my mind is withering away.
No longer caring about the fabric of my own existence.
Instead of my former seemingly carefree days,
I've been going through periods of pure nothingness, wanting to wish myself out of existence.
Periods of pure agony, and crushing grief.
Moments of immense regret.
And times of unspeakable anger.
All the good is being ****** out of me.
Maybe i never had any of my own.
Maybe i was just borrowing theirs.
I know i need a savior.
But it's probably not part of my fate.
I know, i'm always too late.
I just wish i could change my fate.
Or even just have a happy couple of days.
Why does it always have to be about love?
I guess i should have learned to love myself, back when i was almost enough.

Sometimes the sting is worse than the wound.
But that doesn't make it any less painful.
I don't know what i'm doing and i don't know why.
But it feels as though i'm running out of time.
Who's to say what each soul is here for.
But i feel like i've overstayed my welcome.
So i guess it's true that every living creature lives and dies alone.

Sit with me and let’s look at the stars.
I only hope to get back my lost heart.
Let’s watch the sunrise after being alone with the moon.
Now is not the time to let the doom consume.
Take my hand and we’ll wander into the unknown.
Maybe someday I won’t be so alone.

My dreams are slowly turning into nightmares again.
When will the misery end?
Sometimes it doesn't seem so bad.
But then I remember all the things that I lack.
If only I could write beautiful words.
But I'm a mistake in this existence haven't you heard?
I just want to pick myself up, but I'm not that strong.
It seems everything I do and say is wrong.
How did things end up like this?
I just want to leave, I can't keep living like this.
If negativity is all I'll ever feel,
How am I ever supposed to heal?
God my existence sickens me.
But I'm stuck living like this, or so it seems.
Stuck drifting through this world, always a loner.
And it seems many faces are growing colder.
So I'll keep trying not to fall apart.
Hoping this world won't further break my heart.

Walking this road alone,
I'm getting so ******* cold.
Chasing the highs to get away from the lows.
Where this path will take me, no one knows.
Aching for the touch of another.
Just lay here with me under the covers.
But i should warn you, you shouldn't get too close.
I'm so ******* broken and all i have is hope.
Can't escape being used.
Only wishing for this world to show me some truth.
Always searching for the life of my dreams.
But everyone's out to get me, or so it seems.
I'm just walking around with love in my heart.
Hoping again that i won't fall apart.
If only I could show someone the way it needs to be.
Not just for me, but for them to embrace the love i want them to need.
But i'm drifting away into these negative thoughts.
Trying to make sure my body, and my mind don't rot.
I know i'll always be afraid of dying alone.
So i'll keep dreaming of the one who will help me find home.

Maybe I was never worth it.
Maybe I always knew you deserved better.
Maybe that’s why I couldn’t keep up with the weather.
Break my bones because there’s nothing left.
Find a new place to deconstruct your bones.
Because I knew your heart could never be my home.
And maybe that’s why I’m always left alone.

Why am I always stuck alone?
It gets me no closer to finding my way home.
Isolation at its finest.
But I guess it’s not really one sided.
So as I try to find some meaning in the mess of my life,
I’ll try to stop fearing my demise.

What happened to the good things?
The little things?
The better things?
I'm losing it.
It doesn't matter where I sit.
Enemies surround me.
And there will never be a key.
I have no hope to find my way home.
My being turned to stone.
And I guess I'm forever wandering alone.

I guess maybe I’m just selfish.
I don’t really want to end this.
But I’m too ****** up I have to take the risk.
What I would give for just one more kiss.
I need to get away from here, and make new memories.
Maybe if I find some friends there will be better scenery.
But all I am is a product of subliminal thievery.
So what’s next in this mess I call life?
I’m finding myself wanting to feel the sting of the knife.
But I guess I’ll just settle for trying to be alright.

Looking back I know you never deserved that.
Why was I so awful?
You were the light in a dark room.
And I was the gloom.
I wish that wasn’t true.
But there’s nothing I can do but try to make amends.
And hope for you to find a better love than I could have ever been.

Life is horrendously despicable because of all these petty bigoted games.
Why drive decent people insane, because you’re stuck in your petty sadistic belligerent ways?
I tried to get of the page, but everyone’s pretty much the ******* same.
******* all to hell.
I’m tired of all of these ******* rules and the way you plan my days.

Everything’s been stripped away.
I’m still trapped in a cage.
Like a bird without wings.
Never seeing again the joy life brings.
So why is everything left ablaze?
I can’t get out of this catastrophic maze.
So is there another way?
With the rooks in my way and I’m just their pawn.
Will I ever hear a better song?
Whatever happens I know I’ll soon be gone.

All these petty games and somehow I’m not completely insane.
If I could rid this world of you people I think there would be hope for better days.
You can’t live your life feeding on the weak, reeking of havoc and greed.
I still don’t see any point to your lies and games because you people just can’t see.
If selfish hearts continue to be in control, it’s only a matter of time until something more ugly unfolds.
So what’s next in this web of lies?
Who’s next? Who’s not wearing a disguise?
So as I try not to suffer completely, I’ll try to focus less on the fact that I won’t be leaving.
But this towns disease is spreading like cancer.
I wish I could find it in me to figure out some better answers.

As my soul turns to ashes, I wonder if I’ll be able to move past this.
It seems the planets in my world are colliding.
And all I can do is keep hiding.
If I could change anything I’d still want to be by your side.
But there’s no more hope and I know that you’ll never be mine.

I guess it's true that you can take things for granted because you didn't know what you had.
I'm so consumed with all the bad, and i couldn't enjoy any of the good i had.
If you change and don't realize, are you losing or are you growing?
It used to always be my feelings showing.
But now i feel mostly nothing, so numb to the touch.
To the chaos.
I'm becoming bitter.
And i can't figure out any of this.
Why does it always lead to remiss?
Things are so scattered and it's always my life that's shattered.
Can i grow into a person i can accept?
All of this is just such a mess.
I just need my lost feelings that were once in my chest.
And try to enjoy the constellations and whatever could happen next.

Eyes like the ocean, I’ll always have devotion.
A smile that will always light up the room, how could I ever lose the strength to continue?
A laugh that would melt your heart, I never want to depart.
A soul that angels would envy, I guess this is how life is supposed to be.

In a waking nightmare how do you dream?
How can i make it easier to breathe?
In a life full of hate, how can i change the pace?
I just wanted to try to live a good life, and not get erased.
So how do i stop the never-ending doubt?
I'm stuck in this abyss and no one can hear me shout.
Getting dragged down further as the days go by.
Seldom friendly faces with pretty little lies.
How do i rebuild and find some purpose?
Somehow none of this ever feels worth it.
I just want to find happiness.
I just want it to last.
But it seems my mind is stuck in the past.
I don't know where to turn, all that's left is an empty glass.
So i'll try to pick myself up just one more time.
As i try to fix all of this and not get pulled under the tide.

What’s going to happen next in this series of unfortunate events?
The masquerade presents:
My untimely and overweening death.
So why am I sitting here writing these words?
My existence is a hoax, haven’t you heard?
So as I accept that probably everyone will never care,
I’ll try to appreciate this last bit of air.
While they pick someone else to run into their grave.
Hopefully next time they will be saved.

How do I get up and get out of this pit?
I’m running out of places to sit.
It feels like a never ending downwards spiral.
There is no denial.
The masquerade won’t let me break free.
If only I could just see, the beauty in life but there is none around me.

If beauty is in the eye of the beholder, what happened to the beauty I can no longer see?
I can’t even fathom how it got to this degree.
If only I could learn to soak in the beauty of the world.
Will there ever be hope for anything meaningful to unfurl?
Or will I continue drifting hopelessly through this cold world?
Whatever my fate, I need to escape.
Because this vicious cycle is filled with too much hate.

What is death if not a fresh start?
Do you get a new chance after your body falls apart?
What about your soul?
Does it reach the stars?
Maybe we’ll never know but I want to go far.
If we get reborn will we dance in the rain?
I hope there are more chances because it can be hard to stay sane.
Maybe in each life we’ll be awakened by love.
And from us will eminate the stardust from above.
So as I keep trying to be the best version of me,
I’ll keep on believing in the beauty that is all around me.

What's to come in these passing days?
Life is despicable I'd rather get slain.
Why the **** can't I get off of this God forsaken page?
You people deserve the absolute worst and there's no way to see it any other way.

It’s like my world is burning.
And all I can do is stare blankly.
Standing in the never ending crossfire.
Of faces I’ve encountered, dropping hate like bombs with no regard to anything that they’re doing.
How can people be so senseless?
In a world of hate, will I find it in me to escape?
This place is a cesspool. It’s like an army of petty ******* renegades. Keeping up charades for their own selfish satisfaction.
Who are they to dictate the lives of others?
But with people so conniving you can never talk any sense into them, it makes them belligerent.
And I’m at a loss because they have no ******* common sense.
So as I hope things take a change into a more positive light, I’ll hope I don’t get lost in the night. And hope that someday soon things end up alright.

While you pick me apart day by day, and make sure there's no other way, I come to find there was never another page.
Because its a web of chaotic lies and your belligerent ways.
So why can't I pick out the seeds that you all planted?
This is a despicable mess and I'm the only one standing.
So what am I standing for?
A chance to escape.
But your greed filled ways and entitlement make it impossible to get away.
So while I hope that you all suffer worse, I'll wonder why life is a trap and it feels like only a curse.

You people are so belligerent nothing will ever be enough.
So this time just remember that you all caused this to erupt.
Don't remember me because you're all ignorant *****.
I wish I could take the pain but if I kept going I'd never stop calling your bluffs.
So here it is, my merciless casket.
And there's the life you people took, if you hated me that much you wouldn't have it.

Why am I so scared of dying alone?
It gets me no closer to finding a home.
I guess I just have too many emotions.
Dig deeper, I go almost as deep as the ocean.
I’ve been spending today trying not to cry.
But I can’t help but think about that look in your eyes.
What did I do to deserve you in my life?
I find myself wanting to feel the blade of the knife.
Oh god what I would do if you would give me the time of day.
I know I ****** up, I just wish you would stay.
But as I try to move on, I’ll try not to think about the fact that you’re gone.
And I’ll try my best to be strong, as I try to be okay and maybe one day move on.

If we are born whole, why do i feel as though i've been taken apart piece by piece?
Like a flower whose petals have been torn, just to figure out if he loves you.
Why is my soul still left roaming the earth looking for something real?
When will i find where i fit into this chaos?
When people rearrange your pieces, it's hard to see who you really are.
But should you dwell on who you are?
Or embrace who you are only to mould who you should be?
There is no right answer.
You just need to get up and get out.
What you seek will find you in the end.
You can't sit around waiting for your life to change.
Be the change.

It’s an orchaestrated mess and I never had a chance.
Why did I ever think I could have another dance?
I don’t know where to go but I know I can’t stay here.
No matter what happens I know I have to stop running away from fear.
So where can I go in hopes of a better song?
I don’t really know what’s going on but it’s all so ******* wrong.
I guess I’ll see what cards I’m dealt next, because not even I know why this is such a mess.
So as I muster up any ounce of courage or hope that’s still locked away,
I’ll keep just trying to have at least one better day.

Belligerence seems like you peoples type of sanity.
Ignorance is never key.
But you people keep others in misery.
It doesn't matter what the truth is, it all just holds up to your greedy and selfish hands.
It doesn't matter where anyone stands.
Because you people only care about power and control and your bigoted and senseless plans.

Longing to feel deaths cold embrace.
I miss the days of a pure smile on my face.
So I guess now I’m just counting the days.
But I can’t help but want to get out of this place.
No friendly faces far or near.
I miss the running of tears.
How does everything keep changing.
It’s not something I can find myself embracing.
So why does my mind continue to keep racing?
It’s everyone else’s time I’m wasting.
What is this bitter feeling that keeps chasing me.
I feel undeserving of love, is there a key?

What's left of my fate?
I don't have it in me to end it and escape.
Why can i no longer take the sting of the blade?
I feel nothing but regret and shame.
Why is life a constant game?
I don't have any answers anymore, but it's not only me whose to blame.

The world I’m living in is fuelled by hate.
**** why can’t I find it in me to escape.
Playing favourites trapped me in this labyrinth of a maze.
Theres no point to the games they play.
Because making people suffer will never bring a good change.
So why did I let myself become someone like these renegades?
I have little to no hope for a happier shade in these blurring days.
I can’t understand why they **** out the weak because everyone deserves a life this is all so bleak.
So as I hope that people try to see life for what it is, endless opportunity.
I’ll try to see why they always make the problem me.
Because things like this drive people to insanity.
And it leaves less room for people to live the lives of their dreams.

I guess it's clear that i have no easy fate.
It's something i'm not sure if i can escape.
At least it seems that there's a change of pace.
But things are so misconstrued i don't think i'll ever get off this page.
There's deception around almost every corner.
And it seems this life of mine will never have much order.
So i guess i'll just have to get used to being alone.
Because it's not part of their plans for me to have a hand to hold.
But **** it's getting so lonely and cold.
And it's getting so hard to decipher this mess, it's like i'm wearing a blindfold.
So as i try to get out of this awful sequence, i'll try not to think about my fate because i know when that day comes i won't be missed.
I just wish it was in the cards to get out of this.

May the soft breeze sweep away your fears.
Allow the warm sunshine to rid you of tears.
Darling let's run away together,
we'll create our own perfect weather.
Of winter's no longer lonely and cold,
having one another to hold.
Wandering together on a cool Autumn's day,
through spring and summer i hope you'll stay.

Maybe as the days pass there could be hope.
But I still feel like I’m going to choke.
Maybe one day I’ll witness everything in bloom.
And not feel alone in a crowded room.
So as I muster up the strength to continue, I’ll try to find the right shoes, in hopes of living in a brighter hue.
As I try to feel something other than black and blue.

I don’t blame you for walking away.
But I can’t say it’s not killing me that you couldn’t stay.
I think you’re stronger than you think.
So let your feelings flow with the ink.
I know we had something worth keeping.
It’s just so hard without you so I keep grieving.
But I know you were right in leaving.
Even if it’s not you that I can keep seeing.
I still wonder about you as the days go by.
Even though I sometimes question if it was all just a beautiful lie.
You made me want to break out of my cocoon.
Maybe it all just happened a little too soon.
I’m standing on the edge hoping I don’t drag you down too.
I never wanted anything but the best for you.
And that’s why without you, my world is painted blue.

Dying a little more with each passing day.
Where am I headed? How do I escape?
I want to get off this petty ******* page.
It’s like I’m trapped in a cage with fits of rage.
So now that I’m sanely going insane, how do I break free? They keep me in chains.
So crippled in life, but I can’t handle the knife.
How do I rid myself of all of this strife?
I guess this Is now my life. But I wish it weren’t true.
I’m lost in this sequence where most truth is misconstrued.
So how do I get up? I know I’ve had enough.
At least some see that the masquerade does nothing but bluff.

Deception around every corner.
Where am i going?
There's nowhere to hide.
No salvation.
No saviors.
My world is crumbling before my eyes.
And there's nothing i can do to piece it back together.
What happened to being real?
Yeah i'll keep my lips sealed.
As for connections, there are none here.
Seemingly friendly faces masked in seemingly good vibes with the help of beer.
Yeah i know my life is unclear.
I wish you never left because i need you near.
I can't get too close without losing my dignity.
But here i am stumbling around timidly.
Yeah i act like i can handle this.
But when you're alone, it's hard to escape being tricked.

Am i even remembering things clearly?
I trusted you, now i'm not so sure i want you near me.
I guess i set myself up for failure with all of these problems.
But it's hard to escape them, i'm just trying to find a way to solve them.
How can i go on when no one is true?
I hate being alone, i myself never really knew what to do.
While i'm drowning in whatever i can get to keep me sane.
I'm just trying to fix things, and forget about all these petty games that bring only pain.
As i try to hold my head high while mostly bottling it up inside,
I'll just hope i can make it through this mess i call life.

All this time I’ve been standing alone.
I just wish I could find someone to call home.
But this life is breaking me, and I’m getting such brittle bones.

And as I watch the cars pass, it makes me wonder if they have a destination, if I have a destination.
With eyes set on the stars where do you start?
Where does anyone start?
They say to be successful means not to reveal everything you know, but I'm an open book.
I guess I'm not broken anymore, but I'm not alive either.
When you feel like your soul is dragging your corpse through life, how do you gain what you lack?
How do you get the spark in your eyes back?
How do you get the fire back that was burning up inside to make you feel complete?
Where did all the good go?
Why do my eyes feel as though they could swallow someone whole just for them to find out that I'm empty...
I don't know if anyone has all these answers.
Maybe I was born to lose.