to that one girl over there*

chock-full of intimacy,
i can't stop looking at the wrinkles in your hair
and the way they caress the curvature of your ears.
every smile drives me deeper into insanity,
and as your upper intersects with your lower,
i heave a sigh of pain.
waltz there, waltz here - your every move is like a dance
God Almighty choreographed himself.
My soul is like a bird - fluttering to the unknown,
but every season I come back for you.
your thighs were sculpted my Michelangelo,
your voice was crafted by Ella Fitzgerald,
your grace was gifted by your parents,
and my love burns hotter than the passion i have for you.

And I feel as if
I want for nothing
And I lust for nobody
And I love nobody
An all this life
And this world
Is just in my head
And I can't grasp
Anything
I can't hold onto anything
How is this real?
How is her touch real?
I don't know,
But something is anchoring me.
But I know I wouldn't be afraid
To pull the trigger
If it was against my temple.
Only thing I would feel was regret,
And if I'm dying,
Who cares?

i fear that i have met my soul mate
and he has not met his
thousands of miles away and yet
by his words alone
i am sure
and my soul mate is not the man i claim to love
he is a stranger
walking down foreign streets
with scars on his heart that look similar to mine
but he only faintly knows my name
and i doubt he could pronounce it
that's the trouble with poets
they can capture your heart from miles away
behind a computer screen
i fear that i have met my soul mate
and he
has not met
his.

I met an angel
And I crushed her pretty wings
I made her fall so many feet
Just to catch her by surprise

I met an angel
And I showed her my own hell
I made her fall apart
Just to put myself together

I met an angel
And I showed her how to fly
I made her the wrong kind of high
Just to lose her to her pain

I met an angel
And I showed her my dark side
I made her fall in love with me
Just to try and survive

the soft snow bed
that lays on top of  the mountains
melting down
into the frozen lake
with soft slippery rocks
that feels good to drown your feet in
and feel the cold water dig under your finger nails
your hear beat,slowing down
you feel the clouds move
and you feel your skin streching
and for the first time
the trees became your best friend
the wind becoming music
to your brain

you slowly open your eyes
and slowly part your dried lips

you whisper in a sleepy voice
"i never felt so alive"

The man i want in the future
if you'll be mine. . .
you'll be the god's gracious gift
god gave you the kindest heart
you stand by your own dreams
i admire you and
i love you purely. . .
you're the man in my dreamland
you didn't notice me yet,
but someday you will
i love you for who you are
for what you are. . .




     -i want to convey what i feel, it's just simple as me,but totally came from the bottom of my heart.

I just wanted to be the sunlight
that woke you up in the morning,
the warmth you wouldn’t mind
slipping through the curtains.
But I suppose it’s enough
for me to be
the memory
you hope to forget.

The rain makes your
veins look like
dark black bra straps
underneath a veil of Topshop sale items-
the bangles were bought elsewhere.
Though it's not their size that worry me,
it's what look lives within your eyes
every time you run a finger up your arm
and back down your arm again;
the charm in your slightly curling autumn leafed smile
curls a little more, turning smooth lakeside skin
into Nile-esturay wrinkles that say save me Tim.

Your red delta cheeks pulsate
in the late afternoon sun coming in on
a diagonal through the newly installed,
doesn't quite close properly, velux window;
you ran through fields only
to end up teary eyed in the kitchen
doorway threshold.

But here, here is where your river 
meets my sea, and turbulent tides
swell up to ferry us away to new coastline
continents:
forget we ever swimmed and swam,
poured sand from our shoes,
held hands and ran, and
forget we held hips on train station steps,
shared lips, left and then hid.

*When you see this you'll know it's an apology