I lit a cigarette
& saw the end in the flame
I haven't told you yet
But it's probably all the same

So I smoked 'till dawn
& thought about pearly gates
Nothing left to dwell on
I need a touch of grace

I lit a cigarette
& I saw how I'd die
I haven't told you yet
But I'm no good with "goodbye"

Everyday is the same.
I feel darkness and terror with the unknowing of life,
Uncertain of what I stand for, and what my purpose is.
But I feel that is normal, for a girl of my age.
With so much to offer, it just seems surreal,
In fact, nothing really feels real.
I wake up in the morning, quarter to 7,
And the one thing on my mind is, "Is this worth it?"
I think, "Is what I do even adding up to something?
"Is this life I live, a life at all?"
And I smile,
Because it does not matter.
Nothing matters, really.
You make me happy, and I like you.
And I like how I feel when I'm with you.
I like how it feels being in your arms,
How it feels when you talk, and I can feel the vibration of your voice through your shirt.
I am certain of two things,
I will die,
And I really, really like you.

Can I be close to you?
Hold you the whole night through?
When the day is engulfing night,
can we strangle a ray of light?

In the morning when I wake,
there will be nothing more of me to take.
Will you still want me then?
To rediscover where you have already been?

Can I still be close to you?
When you’ve had what you pursue?
Is there a piece of me, some fragmented part,
you can love with a sightless heart?

No need to be bitter
You were never mine to keep
I got to borrow you for awhile
While my soul was hurt and weak
You were sent to me
at a time I needed lifting up
A time when that one person
could not fill up my loving cup
It was as though my heart
had been placed on hold for a bit
Yet I was expected to go on without it
Just go on without any worries
after all... its only a heart

Plummeting towards Earth
From such great heights
Having fallen victim
To such awful nights
Where we would sit up screaming
Voices raised, heated fights
A love, once so precious
A flame, no longer bright