Take a dive into the deep end of my mind
You'll find that there's not a lot that I don't drag behind
You see my skull is smeared with thoughts like a finger-painted wall
Like a ****** scab that clots when they miss you and you fall
And there's not a lot remembered, but there's everything I think
It's like stink I can't get rid of, a drink I know I shouldn't
But the bottle's empty and I start to drive
Not sure if I plan to make it out alive and it's five o'clock in the morning
But it might as well be one, for behind my eyes are flashes of all the **** I've done
And regrets pile on regrets until my office desk is filled
And the mind that fills the inbox is the one that should be killed
Or remedied or altered or driven from the skull
So the finger-painted walls can be shut down from show-and-tell
But no matter what I'm thinking, there's worse that's yet to come
For the brain is far from brilliant, the brain is just a dumb
******* ***** and with off switch in my hand
I pull the trigger, click the lights, and depart the living land

When you come to see me, dear,
Wear stars in your eyes
So I know you're true.
And when you speak to me
Keep honesty in your voice
So I believe in you.
When you come to see me, dear,
I'll wear my heart on my sleeve
So you know that I am true.
And when I speak to me
I'll have flowers on my tongue
Because I believe in you

My heart aches for you Dad
why did you have to go?
I'm trying to hold back the tears
and not let the pain show,
But I'm angry and sad dad, angry
because you was took from me,
But mostly sad because in my
life you can no longer be.

I know you tried fighting it
Dad right up to the very end,
But death suddenly snatched you away
when we thought you was on the mend,
You tried hiding away because you
was stubborn and you was strong,
But I'm sorry I told everyone they would
have found out you was ill before long.

I know you had it in your head they
had no right to know as they didn't care,
But more people than you realised
had there peace with you to bare,
I wont lie dad to me you wasn't a
perfect parent but none of us are,
But I saw how much you changed,
you tried harder, you raised the bar.

It doesn't matter to me how much
you did I will always love you,
And I hope I spent enough time
with you that you know this is true,
I will always keep in mind, gone
but never forgotten as I always say,
Because dad how can I ever forget
that you passed away near my birthday.

I'm grateful our last conversation for
a change wasn't all that bad,
You told me you was proud of me
for that I shouldn't be sad,
So I will make you proud dad and
write a story like I promised to,
And if I get published one day my first
book will be dedicated to you.

I feel for you dad nothing
I write will ever be enough,
But I will keep writing even
when times seem tough,
This final act I can do for you
is to keep to what I last said,
And write my story every word
for you that are in my head.

After the years have passed us by,
Longing for more for time as we try,
Fewer days that we can spend together,
Discovering our love is denied forever,
Reflecting back to when our love did begin,
Wishing you could fight this battle and win,
You had to stay positive, you could only try,
You didn't show any fear, you didn't even cry,
Sat here beside you I had to appear strong,
Knowing every second without is too long,
You’re slowly slipping away from me lying
in that bed,
The final words you gasped to me I remember you said,

"I'm not leaving you, I'm right here by your side,
Live life to the fullest, don’t stay inside and hide,
I will never leave you, believe me don’t you see,
Because I'm in your heart and forever that will be."

The sea beneath
the sea within
the hollow feelings
from there to then

As the thought breaks
parts the clouds
As the light comes
within allowed

I touch your lips
you gentle thing
you touch my heart
oh hear it sing

The sun beneath
as far as be
the sea within
sets sails on wing

There go no
red day dawnings
there are no
red flag warnings

Only reflections on the iris
of the eye
only purest warmth
over oceans glide

My heart is still cracked and you say you understand but you don't not really and I wish I could make you but I couldn't hurt anyone like that I wish you knew I wish I could tell you I wish I wasn't afraid I wish I wish I wish I loved you as much as you say you love me but I'm afraid to let you in and I'm afraid to give you the power to hurt me because last time I did that I was fatally wounded and I can't bleed out again my heart can't take it

They were scared of the dark
And the monsters under the bed.
I guess they all forgot
Real monsters live in your head.
They come out to play
When the sun sets in your eyes.
The skin you wear
Is just a tricky disguise.
Inside you're green
And your claws are large.
Your sweet voice is gone,
Becoming the sound of a battle charge.
So don't light a match,
We don't even need a spark.
Just turn the lights off,
The truth comes out in the dark.