Clicks are broken grown apart
Families made starting a new
The days are long never ending
From a comfort zone to insanity
Trying to cope no reaction
Holding it all in
Not sure where to start
Starting over again
A huge fall letting go
It seeps out hard
Survive this pademic
Praying for love so much hate
So many loved ones lost
Can't pay respects
Avoiding the crowds
Be saved praying for all

The girl next door everyone liked her so you had no interest. Pretending not to care but there was emotions that remained hidden. She seemed to like everyone expect you. You heard her complain about her bf and going back to the exes that continued to hurt her.
You got hurt because there was nothing you could do. Acting on those urges would lead to losing her as a friend. Felt like everything went wrong trying to protect her. Eventually you fade out focused on those rare good times. That brought joy from a tough child hood. Memories faded away moving hard to do but became second nature.

They made him feel small not included. That's the worse some days he felt included other days he had no clue. He didn't need it want their approval. But to be around them felt like you had to lower yourself to be liked to be accepted.
He didn't care what you owned, it's all about how you treat people. He was about the work stayed focused. All the criticism for him to get it together but they don't got it together. It's the worse feeling from a friend and family member.
These made up rules they aren't right and keep others out so they can maintain the power struggle with guilt trips.

Family is tough but that love is real. Cousins get mad and worry for you. Told not to cry, don't be a *****. As we grow older it's hard to express yourself. Show emotions to your partner. Life should get easier but childhood habits complicate things.
Always looked up to them and ended up disappointed telling yourself to be better. Do better seeking a role model not another don't be like that life lesson. Open to grow change for the better life is full of lessons Be open to grow and learn.
Only if it was easy to unlearn and relearn these bad habits that have been normal. Always the outsider looking in. Once inside you do your best to survive. Someone is always threatened or sees you as the bad one when they've done worse. Quick to throw you under to cover their ***.

Read the Bible felt empowered
Recharged playing with the bass guitar
Writing to get this mind sharp
Keep focused on work need to keep busy
Paying medical bills invested in health
Hustling for insurance get out of debt
Stay above water learning to float
Surviving the chaos of the storm
Bobbing for air to stay alive
Not drown sink to the bottom
Trying to be normal without judgement
Always asking about my health
Older tired and slowing down
Others worried it's not helping
This health condition not an excuse
Doesn't help feeling medically discriminated

Seen you as a brother the drinking consumed you.
Thought I knew you all the shady acts manipulation
Tried to help wasn't any better just as bad maybe worse.
Trying to hit on his girl blamed her for shooting him down
Gave him stuff for being in interracial relationship
While sneaking around doing the same
Judged for his clothes being labeled
By the hater who's wearing the same brand
Friends to foes someone unknown
Close to distant not bothering anymore.
Use to talk now whatever doing our own thing

He worked hard finally appreciated
Dealing with people that work
Makes sense things are better
Instead of dealing with lazy people
Talks of sabotage for a career
For someone who wants to move up
Talks of becoming a lead to a lead
He knew that this was a big move knowing this persons a top prospect
Keeping things balanced going strong
A major role compared to before
Ignored treated bad no one's listening
An outside looking in not the place
Not going to find it in another person
Never materialistic seeking wisdom
Neglected feeling like a nobody
Determined to become a somebody

The problem with being up beat and positive so many negative people try to make you a target so they feel better about themselves. You can't have an off day because they assume something is wrong.
Some days its better to be alone and compose your thoughts. Easier to be alone but do like when people aren't being consumed by their frustration and acting weird over a problem they have no way or control over.
It's easy to be yourself when you don't have others assuming, making you out to be someone you're not.

Waking up sore not young anymore
Pushing hard fighting back
Not recovering the same
Immune to all the pain
Hustling strong to stay sane
Been broke before never again
Wide away body tired and sore
Mind racing wheels turning
Tender laying in bed trying to rest

When he had problems seen as issues
Had an opinion seen as disrespectful
Speaks when spoken to, no one is listening
Trying to be his own person not a follower
Leading left walking alone use to it
No trust or respect for him just amusing
Not talking anymore just listening
Not interested in sharing better alone

Mom's blaming everyone but herself
Son is a thief always mad at something
Running her mouth over nothing
All this talk no do mad at the truth
Called ruthless blunt not holding back
Writing this story from the people
Who's drama ruins my day
Healing from pain ******* up memories remain
Sober living getting cussed out by a drunk
Confronted the hunger over not talking anymore
Always on trial for being myself
While others are praised for being fake
Talking about others doesn't make you better
On the way one day it will all fade away

Never wanted or claimed
Made his own way
At the bottom
Looking up saying one day
Trying to be more
Aiming for the top
One day be know for efforts
Hard work pays off pushing through
Missing everyone going solo
Staying strong hurting inside
Emotions hidden starting to show
Working through the bad
Hoping it turns out accordingly

Being the voice of reason
Made him numb detach feelings
Focused on the task not the problem
He loved too much expecting equality
Ending up disappointed feeling betrayed
No one has his heart or cared as much
Usually in the back working hard
Saying how he felt got him hurt
The worse is when he catches feelings
Gets a crush on a person of interest
Never thinks the same it's complicated
Or feel the same way back

You trust them turns out they don't respect you. You know your role and place as they try to divide and conquer by turning everyone on you since they didn't get their way. You spoke up now they aren't talking to you but about you. Not trying to trigger them or give them a reason would rather be free then feel shut down defeated to be accepted.
Had their back now they are bad mouthing me behind mine. Don't care to be right easier to be alone than be around people who are never happy expecting others to change not doing anything to improve themselves.

The love in the light
Lust at night romantic moon lighting
Secret love doesn't feel right
Things didn't work out
Being single things will be alright

He got emotional he could taste the stomach acid in his throat. Not sure how to feel someone always provoked him to get a reaction. After a while it felt like it wasn't worth it.
He wanted support had it a few times but didn't last long. Years of betrayal made him feel unworthy. Everyday he would prove himself someone would point out one flaw/mistake discrediting his hard working efforts.
He was a big dreamer so much on his mind. Hard for him to commit to others but learning to commit to himself. Asking what he wants or how can he do it with his flare added to the mix.

Writing about it trying to forget all hyped up
Processing the insanity no matter was done
Things would be said or cause controversy
Some kind of commotion with backlash
Not talking about anyone just the interaction
The frustration from caring to much
Causing anger for not caring enough
Not easily provoked or talking anymore
Hard to speak when an opinion
Triggering others feeling like a target
Told be your own person its never enough
Not trying to be labeled or boxed in
The rebel who doesn't follow to be treated different or fall into place
Choosing to have his own identity not be lost in the crowd
One mistake and he felt pushed out and learned to be okay with it

Always working for his tired of being denied
Hard to grow when everyone stays the same
Doing his thing they made it about them
Working hard to maintain an uphill bad
No one talking about anyone massive tension
Trying to stir the *** full of resentment
Able to go out not married single no kids
Not liking the guilt trip able to explore
See the world travel not feeding an ego
Not letting them dull this shine
Kills the spirit positive vibes only
Learning to cope deal with family
They'll dismiss, reject everything about you
Make differences out to be the complicated

Thinking of ways writing like life is a matter of life and death. Slowed down because of burning out. Rushed missed things on the way trying to get ahead barely coming out even.
A late starter trying to make up for being behind. Always taking a risk caught up in the mix. Dating all the wrong women learned the less. Thankful for the moments focused on the good over the bad.
Working jobs trying to learn as much as possible to get it done. Can't rely or trust anyone have to step it up to finish.
Lost friends along the way, some couldn't be single in bad relationships.
Having a family leaving friendships in the past; focused on their kids the future.
Didn't understand before but everything makes sense now.

He was called a player but she was the one messing around on him. His friends would talk bad about him. The girls would find him more interesting than the guy pursuing her.  He got called weird for being himself while others pretended to be someone they are not.
So many sick twisted labels by others. He had trust issues the girl he liked said no a week later ended up with hid best friend. The same girl who made out with his brother. His family with their tough love his efforts never felt good enough.
He loved to jog but the stress was too much causing him to lose interest. Gave it up for a girl who tried to change him. He was tired of making her happy when she was always mad making him feel it was never good enough.

He didn't like to let people down but when he did he felt bad. He tried came up short hated when people he cared for looked at him like he didn't matter or he was useless. The worse feeling ever some things were out of his control he had no say. He quit flirting with drama avoiding others troubles. Fading out everything becomes a blur not the same anymore.
Just because we don't see eye to eye or agree doesn't mean there is hatred not forcing it anymore. Wasting a lot of energy with someone who's not putting forth any effort. Had an opinion because it was asked not a debate. One sided mind trying to shut you and your world down.
This life is not an option can't just pick and choose when to be involved. Full time or nothing use to selective minds trying to throw a monkey wrench in this dream.
Set goals and doing the work to be told you aren't doing it right. Can't live for two barely getting by as one.
Didn't have help working for this didn't happen right away staying strong trying not to fold growing. Refuse to close this heart off let it go cold. Working to survive while others hate trying to bury you alive.

Work ***** ready for a change
Dealing with a lazy lead
The kiss *** number 2
Finding excuses a bunch of talk
Instead of doing the work
Not settling or being held back
Spoke up now being excluded
Being kept out still doing the work
Never talking about haters
Quick to change the subject
Not worth my time or bothering
Never giving into the hype
Someone you looked out for
Betrayed your kindness broken trust
Did favors now seen like ***** ups
Aligned with the rivals on the outside

The argument played out in his head the anger. He was use to everyone being a jerkface what's different what changed. After his grandfather died the world seem more miserable than ever he lost his joy. Things didn't make sense so much change trying to stay away. They thought he was gay for having style criticized him for being educated. He was doing what he loved they told him he wasn't good enough. All it did was **** him off and inconvenience him.
He respected their time as they wasted his. He had to walk egg shells while he tolerated their nonsense. He wanted his life back he squatted to compose himself and took too long to get back up.

Hard to forgive yourself, one of your worse critics. Willing to help others not able to put yourself first, being selfless. Hungered to get ahead tried to make it called selfish. Breaking down the walls that hide the emotions caged in wanting to get out.
Trying to show emotions without them being used as a weapon. Share feelings without them being ignored feeling disrespected. Trying to smile not be consumed by madness caused by others.

Everyone is going through something
Some understand while others assume
Called ignorant for having an opinion
Sensitive for showing emotions
Called entitled and dismissed
Those comments stood out
Took the criticism somethings made sense
Others he questioned where it came from
A tough time and transition not taking things personal
Forgiving and moving on this isn't the first or the last time
Shouldn't be surprised all the attacks are personal
But those assumptions are the truth
Don't let toxic words influence your behavior
He liked being alone when in a mood
Didn't keep anyone out of their personal space
Some mean well others have their own evil intention
Confrontation is not worth it someone end up mad or offended
They'll hurt your feelings or hurt them
Because theirs more to the story
That ones not aware of multiple factors
That could explain or be an excuse for justification

When you have a bad all the doubt
Comes out who you are now
Compared to who you use to be
Both are give and take a formal athlete
Older now not able to do it the same
Not like be forward work smarter
Did all the hard work need to use it
Apply it to everything collecting years
Years of knowledge experience clashing
Many encounters that help build character
Lost in what you love is its own world
An addiction you cant get enough of
Hard to get that fix to feel whole
Satisfied and complete meant to change

He was over the lies and manipulation. He cut the cord. He didn't care that they had kids or got married. He was annoyed that they made out anything he did to be a bad thing. He never talked about anyone but they always had stuff to say behind his back. He respected them enough to say it to their face. Most of the time; he ignored everyone, and minded his business; most of all his mouth.
He was pushed out for being singles; he hated to be around couples. All they did was argue make things awkward. Then because of their bad communication blamed him. He was frazzled, how is so called friends; called him family then cut him off; what a way to treat family.
He warned his friend about her past, but love conquers all, so it didn't matter; what he said, or what he thought. His chapter ended he faded out and went away a lone rebel on his way.

Growing up with tough love. People being nice is genuine. some do it without terms or conditions. A whole new vibe and experience from the people who care. It feels right without it being thrown in your face or held over your head. Things are not always what they appear to be. Learned to not expect much or ask but to do it yourself if you'd truly like to make it happen.

Thick skin through these tough times, it's hard, but with time they get better. Work harder instead of being all up in the drama. Lazy employees telling you NO or it's never going to happen for you. Don't be discouraged believe in yourself when others make you feel worthless.
Making it seem like what you do doesn't matter or mean anything. Sometimes it's all you know helping you progress and grow.
Being strong and tough eventually wanting to break down shed some tears take moment to compose yourself then bounce back, keep building on what's given. Making the most of things thankful for all the blessings. Tired of facing family because everyone's ego and pride is more important than blood.

Wide awake with these thoughts
Wondering will it happen or too late
Struggling socially usually witty and funny
End up being socially awkward instead
Have a mindful mouth that gets provoked
A private person don't impose your ideals
Asked for help got no response
Did what was best without guidance
Now sharing a negative opinion full of criticism
That the moment passed things got done

He cared when no one else did
Went out of his way and kept out
Smiled when everyone was bitter
Insulted by others frustrations
Tried to look out but got ignored
Looked past the flaws at inner beauty
He made one mistake got over it
Never heard the end of it
It was held against him

She cheated with him
Kept it casual he had no clue
He had been emotionally invested
She talked him out of it
He wasn't ready to settle
Felt like things got worse
His heart broken
Things never got better
He'd give it all up for her
He waited she already moved on
Shattered when he seen
Her with someone new
Once he moved she was mad
He couldn't be with her
But she didn't want him
Or to be with anyone else