Trying to get it right no more covering for others in the end it falls on you. The stress could be overwhelming and the pressure crushing your heart because you want to do right make it better. No one cares they want it done only focused on the results. Instead of the steps and process it took to get there. For some doing the work is a must there's no short cut or hand out along the way. It's about maintaining everything finding balance to have some peace and closure.

Being called delusional for having an opinion
Called prideful for standing up when no one else did.
He learned not everyone would like him because he was different
He was a rebel did his own thing not a follower
Walking alone he was tired of conditional love
Why should he compromise himself to be liked to be accepted
The people who opposed him was family it hurt the most
Becoming immune to pain
but didn't have to take it
The right people would accept him flaw and all
They won't cheer for him he had to cheer for himself
Stay motivated shut mouths prove them wrong
All the talking and they did nothing
Piggy back on others accomplishments
Knocking others to feel secure about themselves
Stopped letting toxic people drain him
Refused to empower lazy people that took his credit
Told he had a bad attitude
He didn't let himself be taken for granted
So many people trying to narrate his story but he was the hero and writing his journey

Quick to close of this heart
The cruel world falling apart
Starting over once again
Another wicked chapter ends
From hurt to glory the healing begun
Another wild journey to pursue
Everything has changed turn the page
Things fades with time wise with age
The unsung hero story needs to be told
A loving heart never gets old
Open to new growing with experience
Each encounter building character

Trying not to over react
Showing interest being fair
Even if I don't agree
Having an opinion gets you divided
Use to being isolated not giving in
Walked away don't care for drama
Not holding a grudge its too heavy
Carrying that burden is draining
When the other person doesn't care
After they use you up
They give the 3rd degree
Only when they want something
They are in your personal space
Things don't turn out accordingly
Not expect in much giving your all
Not saying much but everyone talks
Everyone has an opinion that's respected
No one asked while its being given
He's just minding his mouth because he's the bad guy when he speaks up

Another chapter, A day in the life of the wild one. He met someone but she wasn't the one all they did was waste one another's time. He worked to build his future as his past crumbled behind him there was no going back. He didn't know what to do outside of his soul ******* job. Tired of being yanked in many directions his limbs ripped off his body numb to the pain.
His head hurt the aches feeling destroyed and his defeated heart pulsing. Tired digging down to find energy conserve strength while being drained lifeless. Trying to stay positive in the toxic environment finding hope over feeling doomed

On his podcast he opened up showed emotions writing was easy but saying it was a whole other story. He usually offended or ****** people off with his honesty. He couldn't say or do anything a feeling guilt and robbed of part of himself.
He held onto so much it became a distraction. He couldn't focus trying to figure it make sense of others. He didn't understand where all this hostility came from.

you asked for help, and it was hard to do
You're sharing a moment to have it ruined
Not contributing anything to case
The nerve to complain about things
Controlling the mood, making everyone miserable
Taking over the TV talking loud
Not able to sleep, keeping everyone up
No one asked or cares about your opinion
Trying to take credit shoveling the BS heavy
Failed since day one couldn't be alone
Bringing your partner all you do is argue
around a couple with bad habits
stuck with a **** relationship
a squatter trying to control a formal gang banger
how does a person munch on food
Knock out in the middle of eating
hard to sleep with snoring and bad sleep apnea from the terrible roommates
The caretakers from hell
Expected the best dealing with the worst
They aren't going to take care of you
So you take your health in your own hands
when you want to do things, they make it ****
stuck doing their bs agenda because they are bored
it's never in your best interest but their own

He finally passed his test and got an interview things were on the ups getting better. He cut away from the older crowd because they act like his world evolves around them. He didn't like them being selective about being involved in his life. If he opened up to vent it wasn't for them to feel superior. He thought he could trust them with his feelings but he was wrong.
He became private now everyone tries to pry. He got tired of everyone ignoring him showing no interest in his life. He'd listen to everyone's problems trying provide solutions to be ignored.
He has a support group of all the most random people but he could be himself around

He shed a tear while his football days were behind him. His best friend still playing. That gave him joy and still part of something. His best friend told him your out there with me. The played high school football together and it was a great experience winning titles and a championship together.
He loved sports his cousin competing he wanted to be there. The team was always hungry for competition but starved because of the lack of competition in the weight class. Doing all that's being asked and extra to find out its not enough. It's frustrating on the sidelines ready to go.

When he was at his worse they gave him crap. He thought tough love was a way of motivation but didn't like it. Then things got better and he still got the same treatment. He was done cut them off said no more because he did it his way. Their way didn't work for him
After he spoke up they tried to isolate him bad mouth him. He didn't care about his reputation anymore because he knew that he wasn't imposing or bothering anyone.
They'd never show him love or give him props unless they got credit crapping on his glory. Trying to take his moment making it about them. They weren't there when he needed them. He was always there for them even when they didn't want him and pushed him out.
He finally walked away cut the cord over all the discouragement. Tired of seeing them being two faced bad mouthing people than acting buddy buddy the two faced snakes.
He found confidence in himself without the shady people trying to weasel their way in to his life. He lost weight because he didn't let them throw a monkey wrench on his routine. Trying to guilt him like he did something wrong. He paid his way through and owed them nothing.
He loved them but all they did was hurt him make him feel inadequate.
Changing the rules in their favor he was over the games his life did not evolve around theirs. Praying for them because anything he did was wrong and didn't like people who are one sided.

Never been into material possessions. Had it all lost it all starting over it hard. Learning to maintain focus what needs to be done to get by. Finding balance to be able to work in that dream instead of putting everything else first. Thr transition is always hard because unexpected delays occur.
Always distracted easier to help others than to say what you want and come up with a strategy. Always asking what if or why not easier to do than think its the perfect plan and it will all fall I to place.

Before he could see it feel it from the bottom of his heart. Everyone left when he came. He didn't make it right away but it was his time to shine. He failed the first time it made him humble. He missed it but it came back around so he was meant to have it. He never assumed it was his but never though it could be. Now it's happening got use to getting by when all he wanted was to do great things and feel accomplished while making the most of things.

A sore body stiff joints
Pushing through an older body
Mentally blocking out the bad
Physically going through the motions
He missed them but they are gone
He's not going back to them
They are never returning to him
He let go fear free accepted
Alone is the way to be pain free
Found closure with his thoughts
His heart cages to heal
Soon to be set free be himself
That's all he truly wanted out life
Be happy with out consequence
Not answer to others for his efforts

He was tired of arguing he didn't want to empower negative people feed their egos. They talked and ran their mouth as he walked away because they'd never own up and would blame him. He took responsibility for his actions and said sorry but never forgiven he changed by not repeating those actions.
He didn't like the burden of the world on his back he couldn't hold it or carry it anymore feeling crushed not able to breathe. He loved people didn't expect anyone to change expected them flaw and all. While anything he did would annoy and irritate everyone such a huge causing so much pain causing him to go numb and shut down. He hated that feeling just to be liked and accepted.
He wanted to be himself but couldn't because it felt like such a rip off and being cheated his living life to fullest ever since his brother passed away.

The weight of the world crushing his chest making it hard to breathing. Trying not to disappoint others but disappointed in himself. Trying to find balance working at two location both important to him among the they don't matter. Trying to stay loyal to the old that took care of him. The new took a risk more demanding feeling numb
Just another face in the crowd from a lead to the number 2 guy.
Feeling like a spare tire on hold waiting to be used then back into the bark trunk after the job is done

Older now not feeling the same
Everyday something new
Time for some change
Family divided not always getting along
Thought about relocating
Never needed until you're gone
But things never change
Always forgotten felt invisible at the time
Missed them but there's no going back

Having time to think what matters and what doesn't overthinking thoughts. That have looped and go no where. There's always someone that has nothing going thinking they have the right to mess you. The question is always why?
I'm a very social person I do speak up. Always judged for being different that's okay because I'm not worried about you since you're going out of your way to be heard. I'm not wasting my time or energy on you. I got way more important things going on.
So what a person is heavy your not helping them why are you mad and complaining. A person is articulate with words you think he's fruity for it. Take time to better yourself instead of knock people thinking you'll bring them down to your level.
Step it up stop using others to cater to your not willing to grow or being open minded to learn something.
If you took time to understand to make sense. If its not for you easily walk away. ***** with so many labels and ideals you do what you like and what makes you happy. Just because you like something should make you a target

He woke up ready to make it happen too much going on to be noticed. No one lives in the moment in anymore. Quick to record document everything.
Everyday come up with something new instead of letting material grow into something more. Feels like you can't settle  or take in. Older seeing what's in and it doesn't make sense.
These made up rules and standards that are used to keep people out. So many pretending to someone they are not.

Talking about getting paid prior to the transplant he knew it would be temporary. He had to bounce back quick. He didn't want anyone taking care of him or have to rely on anyone. Minding his mouth because if he said something wrong it would cause his caretaker to act differently.
He needed a ride for appointments but asking felt like begging. Interrupting that person's day made it feel like an inconvenience. Some people see an apology like submitting. While others see peace and closure. Hoping to move on be normal things will never be the same.
It's better to move on and stay away.
He was ready to bounce back from the surgery. Worried about being tired seemed to always tired. Afraid to be alone while use to it. Being a college drop out really complicated things. His mind wanted to finish what he started. Trying to find a balance.

Near death determined to live
Do more over the same routine
The list grows on borrowed time
Writing from the heart staying true
Loyal to all the wrong people
Doing what's right causing a fight
Picking up the slack taking charge
Keeping things on track getting ahead
Learning to socialize deal with people
Be fair understanding the situation
While dealing with others problems
Keep them motivated and inspired
Usually focused on the work
Not about the drama anymore
Since it impacts the production
Learning to deal with others feelings
Understand others than ones emotions
Talked about moving up growing still
Not at the bottom anymore thriving
Looking up going forward rising up
Not going back or settling for less

He couldn't hold back the joy the tears. It finally happened the moment he had been working for years the day had come. He was always a sub feeling in the void now he would get a permanent spot. He didn't think I would happen he got cozy going through the motions. From day one he was told never get comfortable. Keep working, keep busy you'll get in.

Being able to vent have a voice into of focusing on work where its never ending trying to have a personal life outside of that. Trying to please never satisfied people gets old. Dealing with ungrateful being not wanting to do it anymore. its not enough the worse feeling or good enough when you gave maximum effort where your exhausted burnt out to still be criticized by the people whom put you down instead of bring you up

Listening to 90s R&B people talked about love and showing it. Now a days no one want to commit but wants all the perks of a relationship.
Lust is mistaken for love things get ruined go wrong to the point of no redemption. Always one sided love one wants more while the other doesn't want anything serious. Rejection leads to a broken heart the friendship is jeopardized due to the high hopes of this lustful situation becoming a relationship. Expectation leads to disappointed false hope that shatters emotions and feeling hopeless thinking the person who broke

Through all the lies he remained loyal
She cheated later tried to blame him
They wanted him to tell the truth
Once he did it became a debate
Being told how to act was the problem
Projecting their feelings on him
He didn't feel or think that way
Telling who to be made conflict
He minded his business
While they try to exploit him
They've done worse to others
Yet still running their mouth
He didn't want to be involved
Still coming at him like a target
He didn't agree walked away
Said nothing refuse to empower
His oppressors not giving any reason
They had way more than most
Being shady because it wasn't about them
Instead of being humble and grateful
They seen it as a platform to look down on others
He valued people not material possessions

He hated running his pace was slow he felt like he could walk faster. With his cousin going around the block twice trying to maintain the same pace.
It wasn't a race he remembered the days when he would jog 5 miles everyday he was a teenager now an older man in his late 30s. Deep breaths trying to not let up and finish strong. Avoiding the sun because when he tanned he got dark right away.
He didn't care for the summer heat trying to stay hydrated in the garage training with his cousin doing pad work pushing one another to the limit bringing out the best in one another.
He was glad to be on this journey pursue next level ventures. Use to training seeing it as his big event. His cousin would be able do it. Very talented and young with lots of skills and heart that made a difference. They shared a dream but he let the politics of the sport bother him and hold back.

I never understood how a person could give you crap for being around. Now that you backed out doing your own thing they think they could give you crap for not being around. Make up your mind why is it you can hold everyone accountable but when someone has an opinion or calls you on things you try to destroy your rep by trying to turn the family against someone thats holding you accountable.
Trying to discredit a person by calling them delusional and dismissive. It's always what everyone does never what you did or how you played a roll in that situation.
When others have a problem "It's an issue" but when you have a problem "it's serious an important manner" as I get older I just pray forgive and walk away from

The struggle to fit in he walked away
Always writing to rid the pain away
Honest with them not telling lies
Hide the truth with cover ups
Treated different for being loyal
Doing what's right from the heart
Clean head on his shoulders true
Others causing a fight walked out
Feeling attacked standing this ground
Ready to speak up didn't want drama

Watching people come and go took down the welcome mat. Saved their place I wasn't worthy of a place at their table. They slandered his name he never spoke bad about them. Making him look bad in front of a girl who was into him so that this scumbag could make his move.
A true friend wouldn't do that. A huge sign of disrespect and broken trust acting like they are loyal and true to your face. Violated trust means no more openness closed off pushed out.
If a person chooses to be single don't belittle them because you chose to settle. Acting like you're better than everyone talking about others like it's their right. Done with people like that family hurts the most. You have their back and they are quick to knife you in the heart. If they do that to family I get why no one is close to them. Or why they don't have any friends.

He wanted to break this cycle not holding on to the toxic. He didn't always have an opinion or have to say anything. He minded his mouth and kept to himself. Why be around if he couldn't be himself. It wasn't fun or worth it anymore. Not like them better off alone hard to love him when they are trying to tell him who to be and how to act.
He walked away wanting to say something but he'd be ignored so he's not bothering anymore. He wasn't feeding an ego or wasting his time. The world wasn't all unicorns and rainbows. The cord was cut he was free from their judgement and criticism. It hurt but he knew it was the best thing. His days where long and focused on work and writing to make it through. He had a love hate with things but got more hate than love. He blocked out the bad he felt numb because of all the hurt and torment

He was a sensitive child
Being told don't cry
Stop being a *****
As he got older it got hard
Hard to express his emotions
Share his feelings with others
His mother laughed at him
The one person he trusted
Opened up to vent for peace
Took away his safe space
She took his joy broken trust
Heart shattered by laughter
Mocked his vulnerability
Hard to trust anyone
Let anyone into the closed off heart
Loved Hard to get hate back

He looked at his hairy belly trying to remember his youth days where his body contained more muscle with had tons of energy.
Trying to feel more secure and confident about his appearance since he was single for too long but knew he didn't need anyone to make him happy. He would have to do that himself.
Working hard and thankful since he remembered what a tough time he had when he wasn't working his **** off. It wasn't right or the same anymore trying to go forward and not back.