Nice to have an adult conversation where no one gets mad or hates you for having an opinion. Speak your mind and not have them think less of you.
Recovering focused on work get my area back in check. Trying to help train people because dealt with people, who claim to know but have no clue.
If your bust your **** and listen people will help you. But if you think you know it all,  people won't bother with you. I've learned to be humble by minding my mouth and business. Still open to grow and learn.

Learning to trust again
Hard to trust so many are broken
The girl you like ends up with your friend
A friend wouldn't do that
The girl you love says no to being your gf
A week later end up with another guy
People you love slander your name
All this talk behind your back is cowardly
Honest to their face that's true respect
A true friend will listen be open to your face
Bad mouth over a girl passing through
Secrets are kept in this ear mouth is silent
My secrets told right away
Thought it was safe to share
Not able to vent but write it all out

He saw he from across the room
And wanted to know her name
Know more about her and interested
Her smile melted his heart
He never caught feelings right away
Things went well at the beginning
Then got worse as time progressed
Hot one minute then cold as ice
Taking her in for the last time
Soon he'd fade away from her
Denying those feelings was hard
Love was tainted lost value
Emotions faded away finally coped
Time made it easy pain relieved and went away

Being social trying to open up it's easier to be closed off. Working to pay bills while the thought of finishing the pursue of a degree. Being able to find balance make it work without time conflict getting worked up and burnt out.
He saw his a banner of his old college. It took him back wanting to finish but working to make a living. Wanting to use and apply the education that was being taught not just reading. You're suppose to prepare yourself but it doesn't always come natural.
Some have to work harder trying to do something no one else has done. Scared once you made it you'd have to support your loved ones. You don't expect much from anyone but they expect everything from you. You support them as they tear down your dream because life got hard or ran out of funds because surviving does matter.
Talking about this because it's been in the bottom of the heart while so many distractions cause you to get misguided in the wrong direction. Making money and making moves scared it might not be the right one. What if it's wrong instead of looking for possibilities.

It ***** we don't talk anymore
We use to be close really good friend
Holding a grudge divided us
Things were said misunderstood
An apology not accepted
Forgiveness is wanted but not given
Friendships ends over ego and pride
Relationships destroyed in a power struggle
One lives a lie while being angered by the truth

If I could change the past I would
So much pain over the years
Dividing everyone that use to be close
The death of a brother causing trauma
Watching the burial changes a person
Our friend died in a tragic bus accident
Wish this pride didn't keep us apart
These angry egos causing separation
Not invited to the wedding feeling excluded
United the singles making them a couple
A relationship to a family wish the best
Friends to strangers now divided
Once was close no longer the same

Never too late still doing it, always improving not the favorite or going to get recognition. Willing to work for it use to get depressed missed the moment glad to be around it. It's about trusting the processes building up. As a coach, being able to see strengths improve the weaknesses. change it up working on offense hoping to build up speed. Working on a defensive plan with reactions.

Not talking about anyone just expressing a concern. On how the situation, made things awkward unsettling. Determined to be right talking about everyone like it's justified. Standing alone was better than living a lie. Never been populate big on individualism would rather be different than the same.
He wasn't happy with himself he didn't expect anyone to do it.
He had to do it himself. He wasn't responsible for her happiness because she wasn't happy with her decisions. He tried but most of all tried not to blame himself.
Even though she was quick to blame him. It was easier for him to be single in than in a relationship. Not use to checking in or asking. He didn't think his actions would effect his relationship. She didn't trust him always assuming the worse while trying to be at his best. He was open to change but didn't like who he was becoming. He would take his loved ones opinions into consideration. She was never satisfied and made him feel like he wasn't good enough.
Feeling numb with the wrong person he ended it she said NO she needed to be the superior one and ended it. Trying to fix a failed relationship was tough but needed to be done.

Trying not to argue or talk smack been feeling provoked. I know I can be cut throat with words. I've been minding my mouth and business. I joke but dk where I stand with people.
Some make it personal over a joke while other can joke and laugh at themselves back and forth without being sensitive.

Not talking again one is clearly in the wrong
Pride is getting the best of them
One asked a question the other didn't like his opinion
A conversation he had with his parents
Excluding a family member wasn't right
Talking about made everyone uncomfortable
Holding a grudge doesn't make you a better person
Being two faced while using people for your selfish gain
Playing victim to justify your actions doesn't work

Years of being angry finally at peace
Humbled after being sick
Thankful to be alive
Year and six months of doctors appointments.
Six months on the transplant list
Thanked God for another chance
I tried to write about it but lived it
I'd like to forget be normal ish
Whatever that is now a days
I hated the doctor now It's a regular thing
Trying to have a social life usually a workaholic
Taking pills to keep my ***** and body from rejecting one another
A huge scar across my stomach
Near the bottom of my rib cage a reminder of healing
A second chance at life called brave
I'm crazy enough to comeback for more
Talking to God to help me get through this
I'm blessed and thankful to be alive
Not letting toxic people spoil my bounce back
Limited not holding back
Faith gave me strength
Music keep me sane
Ready to go back to work
Love home but not a home body
Writing has been hard not writing from hurt or pain
Staying positive focused on recovery

He felt stuck trapped in his own body. Hard to make moves; can't say or do anything because it's made out to be a bad thing. His life wasn't bad but crossing paths with others they attacked his flaws made him feel worthless. Arguing they play the victim he took their criticism said be better. He prayed for them and walked away. Ready to start a new chapter. Negativity didn't help the cause he chose to be positive as those crucial words tormented his being.

After a while you don't care to prove especially while doing the work. Stopped caring going further and farther than everyone talking.
They didn't believe in you; think highly of you. Use to empower those people talking, not saying anything. Giving them a reason to talk that's all they do. Got tired of the criticism it's never right or good enough. I'm doing the work the one picking up the slack. You had their back while they turned on you trying to destroy your name because they have no say turning everyone against you being a negative vibe against all your good deeds.

The family joined for the festive even
Someone is always mad holding a grudge
Talking about one another but formal to their face.
Spending time with siblings and parents an intense moment
Use to going to other locations
Trying to be better son and older brother
One sibling not invited it wasn't right
Pride and egos bumping not sure how to fix it
Jokes turn into insults and made personal
Siblings have partners one brother is not fond of
Like his opinion will change their feelings

Wanting to talk no ones listening
Not wanting to talk use to being alone
Everyone expects you to open up
You to spill your heart making it hard
After being ignored hard to trust
Don't want to do the job anymore
At the bottom with no options or say
Gave an opinion not being heard
Doing 8 hours of work in 5
Trying to survive not motivate
Proving them wrong doing it better
Told there was someone qualified
That deserved the job giving it all
Not good enough while doing extra
Falling out with the old loved it all
Not to fond of the new plowing thru

They always judged him
He got **** for buying stuff with the money he earned
Growing up poor taught you have to work for it
Grandma said "you need to do it yourself, no one is going to do it for you."
They don't believe in you
But want to share your success the nerve.
Steal your thunder make it about them
There's no secret or short cuts do the work

Not your friend anymore
I'd back you up never spoke bad
While you bad mouth my name
Don't talk on my behalf
No room for a dishonest representative
You don't represent my name
Keep it out of that deceitful mouth
We no longer associate over the lies
Not catching heat guilt by association
Focused on winning not defeat
Stop blaming others for your fault
Own up for the wrong drama you caused
Had to cut ties not going to get caught up
Over stuff that has nothing to do with me

Being asked "what ****** you off?" Most of the time has nothing to do with your life. It's usually the over flow that spills onto your lap. Trying to stay positive but sad to see a child neglected by a father who care more about drugs and alcohol. Visiting her father be in neglected she spends more time with everyone else.
A sweet child that's caught up in a failed relationship and her sibling in another failed relationship going through the court system for visitation. Not always the best role model but willing to help out provide some guidance and assistance

Her touch was heart warming
A smile that melts the soul
The sparkle in her eyes when she stares
Opened up never did that before
Feeling vulnerable lots of trust
Things going right very unsettling
Being wrong hurts most poor judgment
Learning to cope understand the new
Hard to go back to the old ways
Lay in bed hard to sleep alone again
Missing the company not the bad attitude
Full of emotions drained left empty inside
Desired those addictive yearnings
That kiss became loveless no connection
Emotionless gaze became a cold glance
Taunted by failed love from the past
Mocked by memories with cravings
Not able to get that drug sick fix

You trust them turns out they don't respect you. You know your role and place as they try to divide and conquer by turning everyone on you since they didn't get their way. You spoke up now they aren't talking to you but about you. Not trying to trigger them or give them a reason would rather be free then feel shut down defeated to be accepted.
Had their back now they are bad mouthing me behind mine. Don't care to be right easier to be alone than be around people who are never happy expecting others to change not doing anything to improve themselves.

Thick skin through these tough times, it's hard, but with time they get better. Work harder instead of being all up in the drama. Lazy employees telling you NO or it's never going to happen for you. Don't be discouraged believe in yourself when others make you feel worthless.
Making it seem like what you do doesn't matter or mean anything. Sometimes it's all you know helping you progress and grow.
Being strong and tough eventually wanting to break down shed some tears take moment to compose yourself then bounce back, keep building on what's given. Making the most of things thankful for all the blessings. Tired of facing family because everyone's ego and pride is more important than blood.

How is that a friend someone who tries to get under your skin. Talk about sabotage that's messed up. He minded his mouth but when he spoke up it usually got him hated.
The frustration dealing with people who dumped their work on him. He got it done but didn't feel like a friend or things are done professionally. He made the most of thing did his job and went home.
Doing what he could with his limited time. Trying to make a difference leave things better than how he found them. Stood up alone feeling provoked.

He was new to the scene and always dealing with everyone even though everyone har plans of leaving. He never complained but did hate hearing it. He didn't want anyone to leave but did respected their decision learning to look out for what's in his best interest.
He felt selfish but they didn't help themselves and he didn't feel the benefits. He was dumped on his own to figure it out on his own. The closer he got things got distant. He didn't want them to go but it was hurting holding on. He wanted them around but that chapter in his life was over.
It wasn't about him but thought what would it take to make them stay.
He couldn't get close or open up hiding in his feelings. Hoping his emotions wouldn't get the best of him. He would get mad and irritated because that life wasn't fun or the same anymore.
He felt like the joy was gone or things lost value had no meaning. Left alone on the outside looking in once inside it was whatever. All the weight and burden fell on him.

Disappointed for expecting more
Stuck with less refuse to lower the bar
Never been one to be selfish
Willing to help bring others along
Learned to cut the cord
Not feeding into toxic energy
Tired of getting burned
Another lie still surprised

Never been into material possessions. Had it all lost it all starting over it hard. Learning to maintain focus what needs to be done to get by. Finding balance to be able to work in that dream instead of putting everything else first. Thr transition is always hard because unexpected delays occur.
Always distracted easier to help others than to say what you want and come up with a strategy. Always asking what if or why not easier to do than think its the perfect plan and it will all fall I to place.

He loved his family some he got along with while others was an argument. So much ego and pride that kept everyone divided. Everyone talks about respect with the old school vibe. Quick to through heat or shade make others look bad their decoy.
Grandma said don't let yourself to anyone once the advice was applied. he was disowned, never looked at the same. Hurting within but had to move on be better the tough love wasn't worth it anymore. He missed them but didn't like anyone talking down on him, making him feel stupid.
His grandpa told him "don't you get along with anyone" he said "yes but not taking anyone's crap" he was over terms and conditions to be accepted. Why did he have to deny himself, give up, who he is to be considered. He usually accepted most flaw and all without question. He learned to keep a distance not get involved

Writing about love and life so complicated when it shouldn't be that way. Feeling like the past has this death grip squeezing the life out of him. He was sorry but never forgiven. Not able to make those wrongs right. When he does better why is no one happy for him.
He's not a target when they come at him; why are they mad when he checks them for coming at him sour. He didn't let himself to anyone; most come at him with a vengeance once he checks them they are quick to play the victim. Years of holding it in time to let it out. All this burden weighing him down a distraction from the creative process.

He talked to her everyday it was easy because he didn't want or expect anything from her. Till one day he wanted to ask her out but he didn't want to make things weird. He like their friendship, but didn't want to cross lines causing her to think less of him. He was already weird this would make it seem like a bad thing.

A coworker plotting against you when you help that ungrateful person. As they go out of their way to get under your skin but they get mad that you fire back.
Always respectful and mindful but not backing down. Would walk away but this being came ready to start it while finishing them at their own game. A huge waste of time bothering letting this person act a fool that's on them.
He was tired from doing everyones work he cared more than most. Felt taken for granted he wanted to make a difference be the change that was needed.

Too strong showing no emotions
Those feelings going numb
So much betrayal from the deceitful
He couldn't look at them anymore
Never the same there's no going back
On a lonely journey chasing a dream
Healing from trembling aches within
They made him out to be a nobody
Tarnished his rep without redemption
He didn't defend himself or he was guilty
Walked away from lies because he knew the truth and what he wanted
Tired of being buried alive just trying to live be an individual without others trying to bring him down. Like if it's their call or like their say matters

Trying to make moves feeling stuck and trapped he was a polished time he did have a chip on his shoulder. Trained by many since he was open to learn and grow. Helped out many but feeling betrayed have his all lately feeling like it's not good enough or he wasn't living up to the way he was seeing himself.
It felt like the world was against him and like he couldn't get it right something always went wrong while he was trying to do right.
Another argument with the power trip trying to stay quiet but annoyed they assume instead of asking assuming planning his evening treating him like a nobody but covering for everybody.

He was tired and sore tired of everyone talking about everyone. He gave his all while others act like they do everything acting like they help everyone. Its for their own selfish gain. Doing way more than the person running their mouth.
He didn't care for all these made up rules others made. Be this way do that and they don't even do it. A bunch of noise being made that doesn't help others benefit. He just focused on the work he didn't care about gossip or work politics.
He was thankful and grateful for his job. It was very demanding. He busted his **** took pride in his work. He didn't speak Spanish so he got the 3rd degree. Being Mexican born in the US they see you as privileged and lazy.
He did those impossible jobs and jobs no one wanted to do.

Writing had been therapy
Cant say much most grt offended
Or they try to twist your words
Able to cope show emotions
Without them being used against you
Usually say the wrong thing
Trying to do right no hidden agendas
Hard to open up to others
Someones sad story is a contest
Just trying to vent bounce ideas
Come to terms from within
Find a solution to the problem