His dad told him he took a long time to say nothing. His own mother would insult others then say get over it. He was always supportive of them.
They didn't believe in him and only nice when they needed something. He always felt excluded for their love so he didn't bother anymore.
It was about

He showed emotions they called him a cry baby no one cared
He expressed his feelings they called him sensitive no one listened
When he showed no emotions he was called an ******* everyone noticed
He did well everyone quick to point out the mistake
He made a mistake and never heard the end of it
If he was happy negativity ruined his day
When he had a bad day everyone seemed to be in a good mood
He preferred to be alone stay distant
Reading for ideas so that he could write
Writing so that he could share his emotions and feelings so he could be heard
Called delusional for having an opinion
Judged for being different and having a heart
A hard worker one day the mule the next cut off
It gave him a voice since everyone gave his silence a false narrative

He looked in the mirror see his face had changed. Chubby cheek and wrinkles when he made faces.
He felt the same but things around him changed so many trends so much movement he could not keep up. Things don't happen right away it took time. He compares his youth to today, he didn't have social media. He had to be social, he didn't use date sites he went on dates did ask her out and was a man about it. It's interesting how there is so many ways to communicate and everyone is antisocial. He called a friend and wrote letters to keep contact. He lived in the moment while today everyone streams or videos to get likes or approval from people they dk. Over all these labels don't care if you are vegan, liberal, gay, or any other made up way to stand out just be a good person treat people right. People talk big behind the computer or a front when the camera is recording once it's of they aren't saying anything. With age you grow see old traditions fade but those are the  values that the generation before grew up with and new tradition losing value no one original but exciting online not living a life. Broke free once was consumed with age you see the greats fall and the playing field change hands sometimes for the better other times in fear you may or may not understand. You replaced your elders now the youth will replace your way and your time is up. Live life to the fullest live for those who passed and live for those who chose to have a family because you see the world through different lenses. Your youth is gone those memories bring you a smile while you try to make new ones means starting over with new people because the old moved on and no one is waiting around.

Sharing from the moment
Thoughts playing out
All the possibilities
What could've been said
What was said all the reaction
The vibes and tones have been set
Always some type of regret
Love is a foundation staying strong
Peace not always easy to maintain
Respect yourself others levels of pain

Sharing his pain to feel better
Making things worse feeling bad
Letting others they aren't alone
Letting go was hard had to be done
There was no going back missing it
Crumbling within tough times
Not letting others in feeling
Nothing but love full of loneliness
Giving his all with writing the words
Giving life to bottled up emotions
That are messages for others to relate
Letting go of the weight draining life
The glowing soul going dull

We met in high school and time has flown by. You are married and have kids. You came to me in a dream. You put your arms around me saying, "how long has it been?" You got close to my face this temptation not right and waking up from my slumber; my mind racing fueled, by wander. The glow in her eyes, but not meant to be. This love forbidden only in a dream it cannot be.

Music spoke to the heart
The best lit up the soul
Singing fueled the heart
Able to feel sane again
Numb from the world
Love from within grew
Appreciate time alone to reflect
Taking in the silence composing
Pursuing goals to live life
A dream becomes reality

He walked into the shop and had a deep conversation with his barber. He was able to open up and vent talk about things while getting groomed at the same time. They exchanged words while his barber encouraged him about everything happening and coming together for the big moment. Every encounter and experience it all came together.

He had it all once he lost it everyone was gone disappeared. Rebuilding yourself a process to figure out what you want. Asking what does it mean how did it end up here.

Someday are harder than others; I'm glad I made it through today
People will criticize but not look at themselves first
Trying to understand other mindsets is hard when you cannot make sense of the logic
In a new place mentally out of my comfort zone
Learning to communicate with people
who are set in their ways
I don't expect them to change
They do expect so much from me not always able to please everyone
but they do not accept everything about me feels like I'm being set up to fail

They left you broken
But it made you strong
Not holding a grudge goes no where
Moved on not living in the past
Embraced the present new encounters
Breaking free from toxic relationships
Negative family members severed ties
Being positive doing good things
Being the solution making a difference
Over the cycling zestpool lifestyle
Not about that life out grew the box

Dressed for the weather because it's going to be a hot day but don't want to get sunburned. Hiking is a morning or afternoon actitivity it's crazy for me to do mid day. Hiking trails are different from trails most rode a mountain bike I preferred a stunt bike. Pumping hard and hauling ***. The turns and paths so narrow and sharp.

Those feelings fade away
Always wanted to see you
But it's best I stay away
Gave my life to you
You could never be loyal and true
Moved on not going back
Walking with faith let go of hate
Walking stronger not looking back
Separate lives living for the right reasons
Not the same but overcame the pain
Those memories fade away in the light
Easier to sleep no more late nights thinking of you
Wanted to give you love but you treated me cruel
Now I'm loving myself staying loyal and true
Doing what I love and passionate about
All these positive vibes and feel alive

He felt angry because they lied and tried to dump it on his. He was sick of rules be this way act that way things others never did. He did it or didn't do always getting crap.
The internal conflict was taking it's toll walking the line. Feeling off balance about to topple over everyone talks about each other but never tries to better themselves. Always on the outside looking in once on the inside he wanted out.
He didn't like to disappoint others but they expected too much. Anything he did was never good enough. He did what he loved so many are miserable trying to knock him because they think they'll matter. Making a difference for all the wrong reasons later justifying them as right.

Always talking about growth and change
Sometimes the change doesn't happen right away
Working hard behind the scenes
Preparing towards the goals achieving success
It's about balance and maintaining success
What makes sense to you others find crazy
Results produced towards the outcome
Easy to see the ending do the work
That's between leading towards the dream
Take the steps to make moves to be happy
Even if you're alone stay sane deflect pain

Trying to belong fit in was hard for him. He didn't give anyone crap and took crap from no one. He hid a broken heart after being rejected all he wanted was to be himself. He felt like quitting and giving up but all his life was a fight to be heard to be understood. Hes been denied opportunity but worked harder. Overlooked because he didn't want to **** up or brown nose to move up.
He was tired one sided friendships so they called him a rebel he got use to being alone. He had been betrayed by people he considered family and his family was the worse. He loved them but he refused to compromise himself.

People always told him he was in his own little world. It was their way to explain his behavior because they didn't understand him. He was a loving person cared for most but when he stepped out of his bubbled world. He found the real world was negative who would want to live there. He noticed fake people how do you hurt or just people you love. It saddens him to see people pretending to be someone they are not but made into what others imposed on them.
He had been called names judged but it didn't bother him because it was the truth. How can he be mad. He was shattered though with his first love encounter. They went together it felt right but what broke him the most was he allowed this lovely girl to take his heart and play with it. He grew up in a tough love house hold and hated that feeling. Lowering himself and proving himself to be loved. She was on and off with her emotions they had something but it never went anywhere. He did love her but it was not meant to be but he would return to his bubble world never the same. Bad pain and memories remained he would learn to love again and love himself. His world torn down but rebuilding within.
He loved always even if he didn't agree never took anything to heart sometimes he felt like he didn't have one but when he used his hear and it came from his core all felt right. Nothing could bring him down or hold him back.
His eyes big and brown with a glossy shine that made him seem emotional. Long eyelashes that were natural most girls hated him because they had to use fake lashes. He would smile because he was happy not fake one to hide pain like most do.
So many thoughts in his head to him they felt right others made him out to be weird because he wasn't asking or looking for them to accept his way of doing things.
He would be honest while others fed him lies after a while the door to his door to the bubble world was closed because it was sentimental not for others if you got into the world he felt you are genuine and he felt he could trust you but once he got betrayed he'd stay away back to the bubble creating doing things that others seen as isolation but in his mind he was in paradise creating working on things that helped put his mind to ease see things with new or more perspective.

Told his stories talked about scenarios
Asking and wondering
What else was going on
So much change over the years
In his story rising above toxic
Others made him out to be the villain
Written off one chapter and out
He was okay with it not fighting anymore
Why stay if you're not welcomed
Because his story wasn't over
Moved on with life found closure
The girl doesn't always love you back
Moving on she's married and has kids
The infatuation faded in the wind
The lust mistaken for love full of confusion

Writing has been therapy, able to share emotions, and feel. so many try to label you for being different. Hatred for the truth, while others project assumptions full of lies. Don't have many true friends everyone wants different things.
Very rare to meet up with a person, pick up where you left off. Friends come and go like the seasons stick around treat you like family.  Music gives life a positive vibe stories to tell a life lived so many memories.

Sad how many act like you owe them
Tried to be cool just didn't fit in
To be honest you didn't accept
Or want me around back in the day
Use to care and value what you had to say
Now it's whatever your mistaken to think you're better than me
One day you will see don't mess with me
Things won't ever be like they use to be
Waking up within all negativity turning it into positivity
Trimming out all the bad
Avoiding all the toxic people
You only care for yourself
It was a thing you cut me out there is no we
Tried to say mean things
Turns out your weak
Act tough because no one care what you think
You are not to bright wasting up all the light
Moment passed waiting for the moment on a cold winter night
Trying to fight but no need for that back to the cave pen and pad write it all out.

She had curly hair and it was shiny with that wet look. She had a cute smile with buck teeth that reminded me of a chimpmunk. He smile was warm and very welcoming very sweet till you ****** her off. If you got on her bad side she would be heartless and emotionless. One minute she'd love you or she would act like a complete stranger never acknowledge you or your presents. Sometimes she would love you treat you like you are important part of her world other times. She would make you feel numb like you don't matter or mean anything to her.
The day these two met was in the school cafeteria. Both anxious and interested to meet one another his heart melted and the sparkle in her eyes felt right but it was a learning experience she had been in relationships it was a whole new world and experience for this young man. He wasn't cool but confident he didn't have much but worked hard for what he wanted and thankful for all he had going for him.
These two would have lots of personality but with time they would discover more about themselves.

While the world sleeps wide awake
The days are short, nights feel endless
Heat makes the day hard to tolerate
While the cold night is soothing easy to relax
Telling my journal my goal my dream
So many fantasties meant to be a reality
The hard part is trying when being denied is common
Willing to change be no one else is willing to do the same
Wake up late the pure night sky and the stars so far yet so close
Sometimes they are the light and inspires passion to write
The night is a friend and the best part when the day ends

People make mistakes learn from it and move on.
Some think because they control the narrative they are right
Trying to make you look and feel stupid
Giving their opinion no one asked matters
That's what they think and said
Too bad no one feels that way
He worried about this but realized it doesn't matter
He would never be one of them or seen as an equal
He didn't have to explain himself walked away tired of fighting and arguing
He wrote to clear his mind
Now his words are being use against him

Waking up care free enjoying the day off. So much to do so many adventures to go on. Stuff to read and ideas to write. Most of all rest and recharge compose find balance be centered. Sleep in wake up late that all sounds great my interal clock wakes me up early but realizing no work back to sleep deep slumber back in bed. Wake up recharged full of energy. Clean mind free of bad memories. Doing things that haven't been for a while feels good to laugh and smile. Make time for yourself ask what you really want instead of giving into demands putting others first. You like to help others racing the time, so much building up in the back of the mind. Days off free of a routine you get old see things differently. Friends come and go the true ones stay. You'd like to share the world with all but it's your experiences are for you take it to heart but it's not always going to be a part of you. Learn to go without and recompose and adapt to the new never settle always be ready for change. Never settle or get comfortable be ready for the day. Listen to the body mind and soul make time to heal can't always be on the go. Rest is the best once you're compose back at it again. Be free enjoy life for once do not listen to others but set out for your passion let your heart free be you and who you are meant to be. Cut the bad let go of the negative. Your world your way keep focused do what's right your way do what's right time for rest so good nite.

Spoke from the heart now you avoid me. I'm honest with my thoughts but closed off with my heart. I've been hurt and hurt others. Sometimes I feel stuck can't say or doing anything you'll see through me or make me out to be someone I'm not. I think highly or you and think less of me no matter what I do. You claim I'm different but treat me like everyone else. You try to understand me and complicate things. You can't tell me how I feel or what I think. I'm open to compromise but over all the rules and games not playing anymore. If you can't accept me maybe it's best we depart our ways we live our life, deal with the consequences of our decisions.

Not time to hate got work to do
Not taking on criticism
They aren't doing my work
Done proving myself
Just trying to better myself
Working harder working
Being smarter prefer to be alone
Working behind the scenes
Able to get it done have fun
They don't have your heart
Different mindsets brewing fueds
Trying to find a common goal
Done complaing do the work

As I get older I realize it's okay to get away from certain family members. We are family but we don't see eye to eye and disagree. That's fine but when that person makes it feel unwelcoming. They bad mouth your name for having an opinion speaking your mind.
I learned to stop empowering them by not feeding into the negativity. Walk away with your head up. Go where you feel appreciated where you can grow. Don't be boxed in or be someone you're not to make others happy.  Do what you love what makes you happy grow be strong for yourself believe in yourself when no one else does.

Always keeping me from arguing
Preventing emotions from getting out
No time to process these feelings
Dealing with idiots and deep regret
People talk bad getting crazy
Once I do the same they are mad
The BS doesn't phase another craze
Lost in haze of recovery healing right
Writing to stay sane and maintain
Meditation helps cope with this pain
Hated for speaking up having an opinion
Called them out not absorbing the doubt

Letting it go feeling it flow away
The pain fades over the years
Numbness gains feeling
Pouring it out on the sand
Taken away by the tide
Washed away feeling natural
The ocean wind cleansing the soul
Wet sand in toes free feet breathing
Recharged away from work
Break through the routine

Things bugged so he didn't do it anymore
Now he feels to old to do anything
Trying to relax more to life than work
Changing up the routine no one to hang
Always on a different schedule
Hard to make plans no communication
He did his own thing tired of waiting
Feeling depressed it didn't happen right away
It made sense others didn't get it
Everyone confused didn't understand
Not given a fair chance just there
Excluded looking in not meant to stay
Pushing through rise to the next level

As he aged the crowd no longer had an influence. He was born to lead not follow. He knew who he was but too many made him out to be something he didn't have a clue or understand. Willing to help others but made the mistake of seeing his kindness as weakness. He would question all these made up rules others tried to apply. He followed the rules of he broke them the backlash would take its toll others would judge slander his character. He was patient and worked hard his time would come. He did work hard had the skills but didn't like the pressure a natural leader. He focused on the job did not care to get personal but talked about the job how he could improve do things differently make it better for everyone. He was a team player someone who was willing to keep the machine going pick up the slack willing to learn and enjoyed his work. He would get noticed after years of being ignored and denied by his coworkers over the false promises but this new job he wouldn't go unnoticed worked hard and refuse to let up and give up.