Why is it when you smile filled with joy
People try to **** you off runi the day
She loved his smile whiletogether
Now she hates everything about him
He wanted to put a label on it she said no
Told him she didn't want a relationship
A week later she was with someone new
He couldn't say or do anything
Once he moved on began to date
She tried to comeback be in his business
Who knew an old fling thar ended
Would stare down the new with jealousy
On with the new no going back to the old

Trying not offend or upset anyone
Minding your mouth and business
Annoyed how my silence has everyone talking
Once I speak up everyone is quiet
Called them out on what was said
Now nothing was said all of a sudden
Trying to flip it they got caught up
Bringing good vibes while others ruin it

Fell in love with the curse
Denying feelings made it worse
Hoping she's fix what she broke
Leaving with those pieces
Putting yourself back together
Learned the lesson do better
No going back to what broke you
Aged with the pain fading memories
In the present good vibes remains

Learning to communicate
Have an adult conversation
Without hatred as aftermath
Mutual respect still friends
Able to debate over differences
Open to learn most of all understand
Do not impose with silly demands
Don't point out flaws making it personal
The topic lacked support in the discussion
Talking loud doesn't make you right
Overeating making a scene draw attention
Doesn't help the cause make it better

The heart break from love
Sore from fighting through
Burnt out mentally overwhelmed
Pushing through physically
A scar shows healing overtime
Improvement doing better
Life with anger turns to humble
Pain becomes pleasure years of immunity
Free from anguish escaped the past
Released from the struggle free onto new

After the surgery feeling gutted
Pain tolerance high focused on work
Writing to feel mild expression
Sometimes emotions are numb
Trying to stay positive and upbeat
While everyone wallows in misery
Not into drama staying clear
Don't care for the circle ****
Avoiding egos with bad attitudes
Rejecting toxic vines of negativity
Called selfish for being alone
Denied trying to fit in why bother
Over all the contradiction and lies
Hated for being honest being genuine
While the fake try to take you down
Not wishing bad like they do
I pray things get better and stay away

When your trying to change and they keep ******* you off
You don't want to talk smack but being provoked
Trying to be nice getting mad things get ugly
The person you use to be
You don't want to be
But morons bring the worse out
Same crap different faces

Doing what's right because they said it couldn't be done.
Doing extra because you take care of your people.
Not one to use an illness as an excuse
Thankful for the job give it all
Show up ready while everyone else gives up
Tired of hearing the lazy people complain
Be the solution stop being the problem
Bad attitudes ruin the day
This temper will Make it worse
It's better to take walk away
Take a time out focus on the work

Mind playing tricks
Ready to argue not that person
Why bother the person doesn't listen
Dealing with a one sided
Narrow minded individuals
One starts the drama
The other interjected an opinion
No one asked but received
These blindsided tactics
Disrespectful remarks from fake ppl
No longer empowering or acknowledge these people
Family hurts you more than a stranger

The people talking don't do anything
That's why no one talks about them
They'll make you out to be the bad guy
Slander your name just run with it
Sooner or later the lies exposed with the truth
Some get comfortable disrespecting you
Someone will check and put them in their place
The mouth keeps talking and will get caught up
Some have a bad day why make it worse
If it's possible to help out
Contribute be the solution
Not add to the problem

Shared a laugh and a smile
Not trying to be in your way
Stepped aside all I can do is pray
Not going to take the blame
Feel your pain because you chose it
Showed concern got burned hard
My words me nothing why even bother
From friend to foe someone I use to know
Made myself available got left hanging
Doing more productive stuff
Seen as a traitor called a sell out
Wanting a better life by doing the work
Being called entitled earning my share
A narcissistic for not settling for less
Stopped complaining doing what I can
Willing to help out with the time given

Time to move on over the painp
Growing strong from the hurt
It's 2024 you're remembering from 2008
Forgive moved on stop carrying the hate
Near death never lost faith
One day be great never settle for less
Not letting the past dictate my fate
Living with the guilt and tripping
Dropping the burden to be free
Use to be friends now strangers
Sorry things had to end can't pretend
Made effort to change to be better
You'll never know fade away
Our friendship is the past fading away

Poetry is not dead
The beauty within
Defines the world you live in
Some days are hard
Some days are blessed
Open to grow more than the rest

Waking up tired
Composing myself for the day
Turn the coffee *** on
Creamer in my cup in the mug
Waiting to pour a warm delight
Taking that first sip
Getting the energy to take on life

Those lips the day ours met
It was passionate over time went numb
There was someone else
The love grew distant so far away
Once close now complete strangers
He love was great but her hate was deep
Forgiving is better than holding a grudge
Self loathing no more stronger at the core
Trying to understand your frustration
It would destroy the day with bad vibes
Missing you made me sick
Letting go best way to heal

Never meant to be
Break this shattered heart free
Letting go feeling the great escape
Happy for you not time for hate
You replaced me right away
Moved on crazy to stay and wait
Change occurred love yourself
Never begging to be loved
All the betrayal gave me strength
Lost in those wicked ways
Found myself no longer in denial

The love in the light
Lust at night romantic moon lighting
Secret love doesn't feel right
Things didn't work out
Being single things will be alright

He saw he from across the room
And wanted to know her name
Know more about her and interested
Her smile melted his heart
He never caught feelings right away
Things went well at the beginning
Then got worse as time progressed
Hot one minute then cold as ice
Taking her in for the last time
Soon he'd fade away from her
Denying those feelings was hard
Love was tainted lost value
Emotions faded away finally coped
Time made it easy pain relieved and went away

From being the problem
Now providing the solution
Healing from the bad
Awake feeling better
Life breathed into the soul
A smile that brightens the day
Eyes glow with purpose
Begun a new staying true
Focused on doing good
Away with the negative cruel

Growing up poor made me want to do more and be better. The new generation wants to lower standards and wants everything handed without doing anything to earn it. Like a relationships some want all the perks with no commitment. People only last months I admire my grandparents relationship 65 years together. I understand people grew up different my elder set examples I applied it to my life.
I respect change when there's order and everyone benefits. now a days all these protests and laws are not enforced. It's a lost cause wasting taxes and time.

Nice to have an adult conversation where no one gets mad or hates you for having an opinion. Speak your mind and not have them think less of you.
Recovering focused on work get my area back in check. Trying to help train people because dealt with people, who claim to know but have no clue.
If your bust your **** and listen people will help you. But if you think you know it all,  people won't bother with you. I've learned to be humble by minding my mouth and business. Still open to grow and learn.

Staying sobriety a sincere apology
Altered behavior learned from the mistakes
Working harder showing appreciation
Staying loyal to to everyone and loving
Who had my back through the struggle
Cutting off the toxic not longer involved
Toned down joking people are sensitive
Easily offended making it personal
Trying not to complain by doing my part
Showing gratitude by giving my all
Nice to be appreciated it's a blessing
Motivated to do more dealing with less

Friends come and go but real ones accept you draw and all.
Friends don't talk about you behind your back.
They'll defend your name not run it through the mud
Cutting people off that are toxic keep your sanity
No longer dealing with insecure people
Tired of liars lying to my face
Being nice doesn't mean I'm a push over
I joke with people but I'm not going to let others make it personal
My silence is fed up I'm usually open and straight forward.
I don't hide who I am to make others happy
Why is it wrong to stand out no matter what I'm always seen as or treated different.
If I fail someone is mad, when I win someone is always hating never giving me props
I'd rather be me then pretend to be someone I'm not to be liked
To be accepted even if I proved myself it's never enough

I love family but it's not a competition. So what you own a house and your not doing me any favors. I paised you as you rose up while you stomped me down. Never happy unless they make it about you. I've always seen you as an equal just because you have no say or control of my life you're threatened.
It ***** when family is divided over. Had to say anything because someone gets mad and doesn't talk. Just because grandpa passed doesn't mean your in control. Everyone is a bunch of hard working individuals trying to get by no one needs you to make their life more complicated

Trying not to argue or talk smack been feeling provoked. I know I can be cut throat with words. I've been minding my mouth and business. I joke but dk where I stand with people.
Some make it personal over a joke while other can joke and laugh at themselves back and forth without being sensitive.

I've been asked, "why do you work so hard?" I've worked jobs where people don't do any work and have the nerve to complain.
I took pride in my work work etiquette is important. I'm that person you notice when I'm off or given the day off. I've been told I make people look bad they make themselves look bad for not doing their part.
I've lost a job because the guy who does nothing tried to pull rank because of his age. I don't care who you are or your age. If you are working hard or hard as me don't tell me anything.
Sometimes you have to take charge and hold yourself accountable. I try to work as a team but sometimes you have to do it yourself.
I never got mad because I seen it as training know everything so you don't have to rely or wait on anyone. I work hard because I can't be at work doing nothing for 8 hours. I've seen it done mind my mouth and business.
I never talk about anyone but my mouth is always being mentioned if you don't like why are you talking about me. That never made any sense.
Pushing through because I know what it's like to not have a job and be judged hard. If you had more than me why does what I'm doing bother you. I don't get why people make things personal when you don't say anything.
If I spoke up I'd still disappoint someone or make some one mad because I called them on the lie and they act like I'm trying to expose them. I have nothing to say they way they run their mouth it will get them caught up so I'm not worried or making a fuss

It was college he thought she was the one
He wanted to spend the rest of his life
But once school ended it would be back to reality
The future would divide them
He wanted more she told him
She didn't want a relationship
A week later his emotional eyes seen
She would be with someone new.
He felt like he missed his chance
He didn't want to rush emotions intense
But held back saying how he felt
Those bottled up feelings got the best of him
He spoke up not great at expressing himself
Saying nothing the emotions ate him up
He let go when he wanted to fight for her
She made up her mind so he let go
Not forcing love but feeling not enough
Unworthy of something that was never there

Rather than listen you cause chaos
Vilified for being different
Asking questions to understand
Some logic to make sense
I respect your protest not interested
Cancel others because your way is flawed
It's okay to be wrong just own up
Better than living a lie mistakes happen
Do the work inform others
Create propositions don't complain
Say what you need or want
Make a stand with a purpose
Submit a proposal being heard isn't enough

I finally got cleared to go back to work. Still watching my diet minding my business
Before I was an emotional eater that would stuff my face
Get mad or hurt when people would give me their opinion
I never asked I wasn't going to change I'm not perfect
I don't knock others to feel secure about myself
Thankful and humbled I apologize it use to be hard but I've been practicing.  
People are mean and step all over me because I'm too nice
But when I strike back its cut throat and ribbing is like a free style battle that I aim to **** straight forward to the point and blunt as hell.
I've learned to take the L sometimes my stuff is funny but boarder line personal. Once the filter comes off it all comes out

Trying to live years of flirting with death
Being self destructive feeling unworthy
After being ill foot in the grave
Always fighting to survive
Praying not losing faith
Thankful for all the support
Before I felt like taking on the world
Not always liked that's okay
I'm fighting to survive not struggle
People don't agree that fine
Just doing my thing being me
I respect your decision
Making my moves get out of my way

Years of being angry finally at peace
Humbled after being sick
Thankful to be alive
Year and six months of doctors appointments.
Six months on the transplant list
Thanked God for another chance
I tried to write about it but lived it
I'd like to forget be normal ish
Whatever that is now a days
I hated the doctor now It's a regular thing
Trying to have a social life usually a workaholic
Taking pills to keep my ***** and body from rejecting one another
A huge scar across my stomach
Near the bottom of my rib cage a reminder of healing
A second chance at life called brave
I'm crazy enough to comeback for more
Talking to God to help me get through this
I'm blessed and thankful to be alive
Not letting toxic people spoil my bounce back
Limited not holding back
Faith gave me strength
Music keep me sane
Ready to go back to work
Love home but not a home body
Writing has been hard not writing from hurt or pain
Staying positive focused on recovery

They laugh at the truth. He's single because his last gf didn't trust him. He was always with her yet she accused him of cheating. The bad communication and the ****** interaction became a distraction from the real problem. One was in love afraid to be alone. The other tried to care and love was hurt and things never got better.
Trying to end is was hard when you love you fall hard. When you end up with aperson you don't love but appreciate their company eats you from the inside out.
Trying to love like you've never been hurt. Being brave and bold no longer like the old. Cautious protecting my his heart trying to move on.

Back to work after 6 months of being down. I'd rather do it alone. I've been my own advocate till the doctor suggested a care taker. It was scary but I had to be brave. My motto was crazy enough to comeback for more.
Lots of praying giving it to God. Part of me wants to argue but it's not worth or worthy of my time. Trying to change not going back to bad habits. Not back tracking or stopping for anyone trying to derail the track.

The cold wind refreshing moisture from the wet snow. That covered the scenery setting the eerie tone. Most got chills inside goose bumps from the spooky abandoned home.
Silence so intense it was nerve wrecking cold air insulated in the house. Dark rooms with vintage furniture that had been left in the house. No one knew the history or backstory of the house.

Chasing the future everything's changed
Friends come and go like the seasons
Staying single over failed relationships
Doing the work makes things better
Trying to make it easier by maintaining
People throw you under not worried
It will come back to them eventually
It ***** when you can't find the words
When you change others try to bring the worst
All you can do is your best even
If it's not enough trying more than most
Making you feel not good enough
The torment fade when you break away
They have nothing on you they are stuck

Calling people delusional then expecting them to be a certain
If you know a person is sensitive why are you being a ****
These tormenting thoughts fade over time
Cutting the cord was the best decision
Wasting my time with two faced fake people
I'd confront them but I'm already the bad guy in their story so no point in redeeming myself. I don't need to prove myself when I've been good to people.
They dk my story or my sacrifice. I've hit rock bottom made mistakes I learned from them. Bouncing back after a surgery I don't need anymore roadblocks I'm okay with detours.

Trying to be myself and not worry about what others think or feel. You are nice and they walk all over you once you set boundaries they keep up the nonsense it ***** I have to go out of my way to avoid them.
I don't like to let people ruin my day some people just give off those bad vibes to me thats a sign to stay away. They want you to speak up first then what they say is justified. They have so much anger and frustration if they tore you down they'd still be miserable.
I mind my mouth and business but those people, who don't like you always talk about you or try to be in your business.

The underdog

Called crazy but coming back for more
Going forward all the support fell off
Believe in yourself pursing the dream
Many said it couldn't be done
Doing more than most doing the work
Those words hurt but give strength
Haters judge and talk dk anything
No one is talking about them
Personal growth shadows their envy
Inspire others to be better by example
Take charge motivate other by leading
Seen as a failure focused on victory
Doing the work putting in the time
People see the old stuck in the past
Never see the new with a promising future

An open heart fueled with passion
Some make it hard being complicated
Trying to match energy not be drained
Giving my all to the best of my ability
Avoiding the rumors believing in us
I saw a future with you
No one is perfect try to be better
Everyone makes mistakes
I've seen beauty in your flaws
I'm not perfect or quick to judge

Just because your childhood ****** and your relationship failed. It doesn't mean life stays the same venture out live learn and grow.
I've been reminiscing from the past growing up still. Rising above the hate. Learning to become a better person. Helping others finding direction in those ventures.

Use to be angry things never went my way. It was an uphill battle I plowed through got to the top but took a beating along way. Dealing with people that don't value and expect me to cater to their feelings.
I write because if I vent the person seems to have a sad story that tops mine. It's not a competition the worse I'd I shut down ignore what I'm feeling; whats on my mind. It ***** I have to seek professional help so I can be there for my friends. Writing is cheap therapy.
Trying to to live and share my experiences to let others know they are not alone. I love funny stories I feel like it could only happen to me. I share them to cheer others up. I relive moment putting a smile on others face.

Do what you love others might not get it. Somethings are harder than other stuff
It might bring out the best in you
The intensity could cause love hate relationship
It might tire you out but it makes you better
It's tough most are there for the success
Most are no where to be found when you fail
All the effort to win when it's short lived
While a loss has so much to learn from
Bouncing back coming up with a new plan
Focus on techniques work into the plan
Build on what you know and grow

Keep bouncing back. After this surgery a few months on the sidelines I'm humble lots of personal growth. Writing has change trying not to complain and make the most of things. Adjust and adapt. Always fighting but don't care I'm just going to do the right thing.
I don't make anyone look bad, I chose to work hard do my best to do it done. Why you chose to politic about the job doing nothing.  Making it hard for the next guy when you should be the guy.
Make it happen stand out. The right people will appreciate you. Take pride in your work. People will criticize that's when you ask them how do I improve this problem. I try to provide a solution sometimes people want to give you a hard time.
Before I'd get annoyed, talk to me about it. Don't talk about others it will circle back. I meet awesome people but if they are being negative I could be like a mood ring and that bad juju is not for me. I didn't myself focus on my work and writing.

Just because its going on doesn't mean you need to get involved. Sometimes you win and they try to discredit you. Once crap hits the fan they want to give you all the credit.

I'd rather do my own thing than clean up another mess I didn't make. People will betrayal you but just keep a distance. I don't care to hold a grudge, but if I don't trust a person. I'd rather not be involved.

I tolerate and forgive realizing things will never change. Some will never take accountability for their actions. When there's no scapegoat that's the person will get caught up. No one to blame but themselves be responsible for your actions.

It will never be good enough so I don't share or want to show my light because you'll dull my shine. They'll call it gaslighting but it's protecting my day because you'll ruin it.
When I was young I was a fat kid I worked hard to get lighter. I had a friend confront me about using drugs I said no I changed my eating habits. Then as everyone got older everyone was on the heavy side. Turns out everyone was on coke or using some kind of substance. My weight loss was natural.
I struggled in college, It blew my mind people would smoke *** and did coke to do homework. I struggled but worked barely getting by.
Developed a drinking habit. I'm not innocent college was different. People don't care if your smart because they'll think your stuck up or snotty. I learned way more working going through the motions. I love hate but it gets easier its all about maintaining.

Having time to think what matters and what doesn't overthinking thoughts. That have looped and go no where. There's always someone that has nothing going thinking they have the right to mess you. The question is always why?
I'm a very social person I do speak up. Always judged for being different that's okay because I'm not worried about you since you're going out of your way to be heard. I'm not wasting my time or energy on you. I got way more important things going on.
So what a person is heavy your not helping them why are you mad and complaining. A person is articulate with words you think he's fruity for it. Take time to better yourself instead of knock people thinking you'll bring them down to your level.
Step it up stop using others to cater to your not willing to grow or being open minded to learn something.
If you took time to understand to make sense. If its not for you easily walk away. ***** with so many labels and ideals you do what you like and what makes you happy. Just because you like something should make you a target

You can have a conversation so you slander everyone's rep. Calling people delusional or crazy because they don't listen to your criticism no one asked for.
When people call you out or have a different opinion you try to excluded and isolate everyone. Never going to be accepted or fall into that shallow group.
Insulting my character says more about you than me.
Telling a person to pay rent when you never did. Piggy backing off others acting like you did the hard work. Too much time on your hands do something with yourself instead of knocking others

I've always respected relationships but don't care for the hate. Being single can be lonely don't come at me twisted because you have no say or control over my life. Worry about your relationships. I don't care to be around couples someone is always mad.
My friend or family might have to take on your crazy but I don't have to I tolerate this by fake being nice. After a few insults and accusations. I'm free and single no kids. I get mind blow how people go from relationships to roommates. I get people try to work it out for the kids but I respect your way of life don't be quick to judge mine.

Times have changed especially when you hang out with your younger cousin and his friends think you're his dad. Lately I've been around good people and who are doing things. I like to see people succeed.
That's motivating inspiring that guy is in my crew and moving up.  I can't wait to be cleared to drive and train. Holding pads for my cousin and get back on those jujitsu mats. Get back on the grind.
I was going to say how it is for me becoming an adult but I realize everyone has a different story and does things differently for a reason. My generation is different from today. I respect it but don't always agree. I make efforts to understand. What was taboo growing up is socially accepted. Trying to be open minded and learned to say no or if its not my thing it shouldn't matter what I think. Lots of change is good not always better but it's okay to explore and gain new experiences.

It ***** when certain family members try to knock you and think you're going to listen to them. I don't have the energy to deal with people that try to take their frustrations out on me.
I'm done it been years of tolerating false narratives being outcasted. It doesn't matter anymore find people that value your opinion and don't make things personal. I love family but don't tell me how to live my life. I made mistakes and learned from them. I've been criticized  looked down. I didn't let it hold me back or knock me down.
I got better and did it my way. Stopped seeking approve stopped caring who likes me because the loyal ones have your back. Rather then let the doubt sink in I decided to move on without them. Tell them nothing because they'll always find something to use against you they could feel like they have control manipulate your mood.
I don't agree so I accept the role as the black sheep. I had an opinion doesn't give them the right to be jerks. I refuse be mistreated. What are you going to do not talk to me. We are already there. Slander my name what other lies are you going to say.
Telling the kids not to talk to me because you have a grudge that's right. I was always good to them treated them like my own. That's hurt I live with but sacrifices i respect your call.
I'd talk things out but things will never change. Staying away is easier than denying myself to be liked and accepted. I respect your decisions please respect mine. Easier to be alone someone is always mad. I don't mean to disappoint other the worse is when I disappoint myself trying to do what I love and what makes me happy.