Read the Bible felt empowered
Recharged playing with the bass guitar
Writing to get this mind sharp
Keep focused on work need to keep busy
Paying medical bills invested in health
Hustling for insurance get out of debt
Stay above water learning to float
Surviving the chaos of the storm
Bobbing for air to stay alive
Not drown sink to the bottom
Trying to be normal without judgement
Always asking about my health
Older tired and slowing down
Others worried it's not helping
This health condition not an excuse
Doesn't help feeling medically discriminated

Walked away from emotion hurt
Tired of carrying the physical pain
Growing spiritually healed with hope
Proving it to myself no one else
Someone is always talking noise
The voices are loud missing silence
Instead of trying to be more
Becoming a mental distraction
Not feeding those starved egos
Refuse to empowered false pride
Out grew the old life letting go moving on
Embracing the new not looking back
Writing to feel able share from within
Let the flow go from the heart
Loving the personal growth
Words from a passionate soul

Forgive give the heart peace
Move away grow on your own
They made their decisions
While you still have choices
All the voices go silent
Able to breathe feeling free
Rise above the bad
Better than being mad
Cuts are deep mentally
Sharp with a clear mind
Spiritually free emotionally
Good vibes from the heart
Space and time to heal physically
The change for better begins to show

Why are people like that?
They bad mouth when you match their tone quick to play the victim
Eating your food they have no money to buy their own
Quick to make you out to be the bad guy for standing your ground
Trying to make everyone hate you because they didn't get their way
Thinking its okay to disrespect you
They insult you once you speak the truth on them quick to get defensive
Everyone takes their word once you speak it becomes a debate or justified
This game got old not playing it anymore walked away to stay sane
Keeping mental peace over all the manipulation

Choices made to get rid of the pain
Cutting off those, who judge you
Disrespectful criticism not able to speak back
Having an opinion seen as the enemy
Pursuing a dream while they never tried
On a high horse looking down on everyone
Material possessions doesn't make you better
Respecting people staying humble is admirable
You can't buy respect it's earned everyday
All the change is for the better growing strong

Wrestling thoughts going crazy
Adrenaline rush turns to burn out
Flirted with wild ideas felt the rush
Rubbed the wrong way facing fear
Things got sour over the years
Doing more instead of saying
Rewarded more accomplishment

Got a rejection letter that hurt like hell
Got an acceptance letter life was just beginning
Dated the dream girl who was a nightmare
Rejected by the nightmare gutted by life
Got hired gave it everything and more
Now fired never to return feeling burned
Met some good people true colors seen proved wrong
Never talked about anyone staying away
Slander spoken by everyone avoiding drama
A mindful mouth dealing with deceit
Not involved astuck in the middle
Instead of hating on others life
Do what makes you happy better yourself

Hard to write when the page won't load
Working hard starting to feel burnt out
Wanting to live life feels closer to death
Been a long week with aome long days
Feeling in a daze working for insurance
Saving up while getting paid for long days
On the outside looking in working harder
Trying not to be annoyed certain people to avoid
******* one's self being the worse most harsh critic
Wanting to more but coming up short
Feeling like a failure so much to be thankful for
Focused on the blessings not what's missing
A dream put on hold after being denied

The inner term oil burned out
Not writing from anger and frustration
Focused on health instead of taking on the bitterness of the world
People that don't value you, or your opinion
Avoiding toxic environments
Not going back to uncomfortable place
Forgetting those that violated trust
Broken down boundaries
Trust and respect no longer exist
Moving away from things that hurt
Not reliving old pain in fading memories
Cut the lust focused on something real
Love within grows strong as hate goes away

Reflecting on the years
Overcome pain and fears
Those tough times left behind
From loving the wrong girl
To doing what's right
Broke to working overtime
Thankful for the chance
Making the most of opportunities
Got chopped down build back up
Don't like being to how to act
Walked away from disrespect
Hurt like hell but don't need the hate
Learned to take criticism
Being corrected to be better works
Walked away from the negative

They left you broken
But it made you strong
Not holding a grudge goes no where
Moved on not living in the past
Embraced the present new encounters
Breaking free from toxic relationships
Negative family members severed ties
Being positive doing good things
Being the solution making a difference
Over the cycling zestpool lifestyle
Not about that life out grew the box

Sometimes you have to cut ties
You get tired of lies and stories
They have no respect for you
If they could lie to your face
Trying to BS their way through
Rather than work hard to earn it
Don't borrow money or say you will
If you can pay your debt
Eventually your words mean nothing
Holding no value a lost cause
Stop wasting others time
Trying to make manipulate others
With a bias agenda an evil demeanor
Fueled by hate and anger the ugly side
Not empowering the insanity
Or feeding into passive selective hearing
Not playing those mindgames walked away
Silence is strong focused on being better
Where the weak are loud in protest
Trying to make a camp of followers
To hate a person for having an opinion and being different

Said sorry never forgiven
Gave you space and prayed
You'd forgive me I made a mistake
Didn't know it would be the last time
The last time we'd see one another
Heard about your death on the news
A horrible bus accident that took many
You had many things going on
I was happy for you wishing you the best
A good friend I will remember in my heart
Thought of reaching out regretting not trying
Change was hard letting go adapting
Sometimes your mind wants it one way
Had a vision with a different outcome

Always told the truth called ruthless
Hated for honesty while others lie
Loyal to all the wrong people
Seen their true colors had to cut ties
Sending love rejecting  hate by toxic ppl
She cheated trying to blame
Instead of owning up its over now
Once cared not taking the manipulation
Moving forward with life not back
Investing in the future not drugs, and alcohol
Working to help family not steal by use people
Over the false promises empty comments
Over the two-faced attitude ****** remarks
When you don't get your way

Tired of arguing with family
Why can't we get along
Stop holding grudges
Why is it hard to say sorry
Why can't it be easy to forgive
Holding a grudge is easier
An excuse to be bias made a target
Justify the bad behavior doing wrong
All the misconduct needs to stop
Alienated for being different
One opinion doesn't matter
Trying to influence others perspective
Making allies against a common enemy
Taking a breath composing yourself older
Some never change remaining the same
Forgiving is easier than holding a grudging
Letting go instead of holding onto the bad
An open mind in a world of negativity
Staying loyal and true to family even through the dark times

Just because we are family
You can't tell me
How to live my life
I've grown taken risks
You did things played it safe
I'm working for mine
I respect you had a family
Respect my decisions to pursue a career
I respect who you chose to be
Stay home be a mom that works for you
I might've detoured doing what I love
I'm pursuing my passions
Always writing telling my stories
My side of the story the truth
We are different people different lives
You can't pick or chose to be in my life
Commit fully or don't waste my time
That's all I ask always outta place
Trying to fit in when I should belong
Not just be in the background ignored

The sneaky couple fake to your face
Talks about everyone behind their back
Giving an opinion no one asked
Talking down on others they've  done worse
Complaining about people living life
Doing the same thing all the criticism
So why is this an issue all the double standards
Insulting people expecting take it with a grain of salt
Call them on their actions
No wrong was done just imposition
Bad behavior quick to debate
Making the misconduct right
Justify the wrong doing still in the wrong

Dried tears lead to strength
A broken heart heals with love
Falling doesn't matter get back up
Being told NO still doing the work
Working harder than the rest
Proving them wrong standing alone
Fighting to fit in still don't belong
Easier to walk away than force things
Would rather be an individual
Never been a follower keeping distant
An outcast looking in avoiding drama
A trail blazer on a lonely path
Thought highly of those oppressors
Never wanted to be like them
Placed in a box to their liking
Loved for staying silent dieing inside
Hated for speaking up having an opinion
It will comeback for the slanderous talk

All the tears all the pain
Trying to live be normal
Working with complications
Trying to balance out the sanity
Striving through only if others knew
Some so cruel making it hard
Others evil that's their truth
Trying not to fail your supporters
Not fail yourself dealing with intensity
Writing to feel praying it gets better
Express these hard words to speak
Staying positive about the situation
While things are at their worse
Being the love that was neglected
Supporting those who feel alone
Praying for those dealing with mental torment

On the road on the Go
Who know what was ahead
The team took an L
At their best raising hell
From the bottom to the top
Win or lose going all in
All the rage in and outta the cage
Win together bonding
Lose together growing united
Support for one another
Picking each other up
Striving towards greatness
Working hard to be a legend
Determined to be icon status

Working harder than the rest aiming to be one of the best not like the rest.
Chasing a dream in the heart it means everything
The mind sees things differently, it's not about the destination focus on the journey
Watching this world change with age. From private to everything being exposed no more secrets or behind the scenes
The mystery behind the art is gone no suspense just more given content

A cheater who acted innocent
Love was never enough
Playing with others emotions
Lust mistaken for love
Thoughts a long term relationship
Leading to marriage much more
A one night stand with lustful confusion
Always truthful given lies
Going crazy can't make sense of it all
Wanting a second chance to start over
There's no going back or do overs
A one sided love with no pair

He wondered being creative
What moment of his life
He could put on the page
Possibly turn it into a scene
It loops in the back of his mind
His wild imagination off the charts
Trying to keep it simple
Not aware of his audience
Older use to being alone
Appreciating the art of story telling
Straight to the point is easy
Too much detail could be wordy
Over thinking tone possibilities

Seeing the world through yellow eyes
Losing weight too rapid
Not losing faith staying strong
Trying to remain in control
Losing a grip on reality
Things went bad but better now
Skin looking orange remaining humble
All the things you want to do
Before it's too late fighting till the end
Don't let others dictate your fate
Analyzed every scenario possible
Doesn't matter just be in the moment
Doing it makes possibilities
Take a risk and chance on yourself
With or without support chase the dream
Keep progressing the heart filled with joy
Don't let it become cold as stone
A free thinker not imprisoned by old traditions
Modern day ideals are road block
Will not corrupt your genuineness

Learning one way
Open to other ways
New school vs old school
Grew up with tough love
Learning to show love
Express emotions show emotions
Without doubt or regret
Being cozy in one's skin
Leaving old structure
Finding new structure
Unlearning bad habits
And relearning skills
Be open to change to grow
Personal growth matter

Some people make it but don't want you passing them up
You keep working and grinding in silence
Learning everything willing to grow
Helping others to keep things productive
While others neglect to keep job security
Some set the bar others break them
Some provide a print out others have to build off that
Sometimes it's easy others get close
Some stay stuck too prideful too ask
Success is measured differently
Others get by without doing the work
Some do the work making it easier

Waking up having a sip of coffee
Trying to stay warm in the cold
Thinking what's next to start the day
Mentally preparing for things to come
Staring at a blank page soon filled thoughts
Acting normal whatever that means
Praying things wouldn't be so complicated
Thankful for everything and everyone
It was a battle to get there
Taking on an ego with a bs job title
A boss with no respect for others
Due to a docotors degree
Felt connected then everyone transformed
Soon did the same onto new and better
Working to fit into a better place

Without arguing everyone managed to get along. Everyone is going through something some listen others dk how to express their frustration taking it out on Everyone. Some love to argue others don't do well with confrontation. Trying ro make the most of it all. Everyday is a struggle some handle it better than others. Some just never own up and blame others for their bad decisions.

Walking away is easier when the person doesn't listen and made up their mind. Talking bad and trying to influence others trying to justify the misconduct know well what they are trying to do.
Sad times don't last focus on the good because things get better.

Sometimes disconnecting recharging from things that drain your energy is the best move. Loving people even though we don't agree or see eye to eye.

Saying sorry hoping to be forgiven
Made mistakes shouldn't be excluded for them
Some will never forgive stuck in that place
Same old face new behavior altered for the better
Can't live in the past trying to be in the moment
Tomorrow isn't promised treasure it while it lasts

Transfer day come to find out an old lead called the new lead spreading lies slandering his character. This rat face ******* tried to be controlling and full of himself a job title that held no meaning.

If you're in the trenches working trying to help respect was earned and gain. This useless lead demanding to be informed so he could pass it off to someone else. Taking the credit being arrogant full of himself. Before it bothered now it's a laughable moment.

Had to go through someone else's crazy to make you stronger and better person. You can't help them but learned who not to be and be better. Working hard to make sure it got done in a timely consistent manner.

Who are you outside of work?
Tired of living up to ideal standards
Over others judgement
Working in the background
Eventually started to stand out
Working hard to get ahead
Yet still in the struggle
Missing family but with them fear of missing out
Like something needs to be done something is missing
Seen their True color now mad they see there's no games or playing on this end
Just walk away Not worth reviving something thar tried to destroy you
Kept a distance never said anything bad

Sorry still living with the guilt
Ignored by people excluded by many
Be part of something fit in for once
A lost man finding away to resolve peace
Hurt his best friend over a girl
Been hurt by a formal friend
Hard to make the wrong right
Wanting to be forgiven another
Hard to forgive other no do overs
Reached out got ignored gave too much
Let it go now getting all the blame
Trying too hard never good enough
Stopped caring let it go
Had to restrain get over it
Lack of communication
Many assumptions are made

Fired from the first job what made it worse was he let his cousin down.
Getting beat up at work to lose the second job by an older lazy coworker
Ever job and life lesson learned changing not meant to be the same
Tired of holding onto bad it never gets good or better
Just positive thought and optimistic thinking is close as it gets
Moving forward years being stuck stuck in the rut

Bouncing ideas off others to grow
Some give feed back
While others give look at you like you're weird
Hearing it out loud thinking about the next move
Been around different crowds always their person
But they aren't mine we grew apart seeing friends like family
To be treated like a distant friend

Hard to say NORMAL
Everything is weird and crazy that's usually how it plays out
It's not healthy but thankful to have someone
Not treated right but willing to make it work
Sometimes things don't make sense but work out
Being with the one you love doesn't work out
Someone that loves you doesn't go right
Trying to work it out mentality
Physically drained from missed opportunity
Hard to cope with change so rapid
Never given a chance for things to grow into more
Friendships end growing apart
Or over girls that lusted around close friends causing a divide

Learning to eat serving sizes not indulge because of stress. Divide up the meal not consume it all in one serving. Lightened load less stress focused on the change up. From the bottom to the top working on being better.
Looking back but never going back
Better in the moment forget the past
All the change was rewarding
Finally made it while others gave it up
Breaking rules knocking down walls
Rising up against the odds going strong
Striving towards greatness over the tardiness
Friends turn rivals not making it personal
Stayed loyal withing true to self
Taking on another fake persona than before

Meet a nice girl who's not materialistic
Someone accepting that
Doesn't change anything about you
Open to grow together feel like an equal
Not be submissive or treat one bad for power
Something natural not forced rewarding
Not soul ******* and toxic with an ego
Seems easy but it's complicated most of the time

Trying to be normal it's always a fight
Working harder than most seen as weak
Not a lead doing lead roles standing out
Want a healthy relationship everything so complicated
Health issues just want to enjoy life
Eat without worrying
How it will effect the body
Self destruction has taken its toll
Doing more positive and creative things
Tired of arguing with others tired
Trying to get along they are holding a grudge

He woke up ready to take on the day
Dressed his best to do his best
Wrote down ideas focused on the work
Writing his book a life projects
Playing with some deep thoughts
Trying to make it working for
Nothing is given but earned
Lost in practicing bass guitar
Feeling it doing pad work
The concentration is sharp
Focused on being better

Free from family able to be yourself
Do what you like makes you happy
Instead of ridiculous standards
No one is living up to all talk no action
Being with the wrong person relationships failed hard
Not trying to force things it was never natural
Empower yourself to inspire others
Keep working for the dream
Focus on goals challenge yourself
Wanted to move up got comfortable
Opportunity presented itself taking risks
Given a chance wanted it more than most
Use to care stopped worrying got distracted

Things are better working with people feeling valued
Before around people that demanded it was never good enough
From doing the grunt work to leading the pack
Making sure it gets done making extra effort
Doing the extra on top of normal stuff
An old lead set in his bitter ways
A new younger lead that's more understanding
Part of the team not being used and pushed out
Thankful for the changed everyone contributes making effort
Not a bad lead taking all the credit

Loving you and kept out
Your hatred pushing everyone away
Talking about everyone like it's right
Causing division among friends
Putting out positive vibes
Trying motivate others to enjoy life
Stop being stuck on an ex
They moved on do the same
Quit blaming yourself they chose to cheat
Forced it failed because it didn't work out
Loved too much only one sided
The passionate kiss lost its charge
Hand holding gave life now soul *******
Being selfless for others feeling ignored
Helping others

Hard to open up show emotions
He had an opinion his words flipped
Emotions used against him
Silences stirre the truth within
Always feeling alienated by peers
Excluded his opinion not validated
Be a certain way live up to ideals
All he wanted was to be himself
Treated like he did something wrong
Working twice as hard feeling cheated
Rsing up feeling brought down

The trio met behind the building to talk about the turn of events. Everyone played a role some did more than others. The boss would cut out the lead who was the middle man. Talking to the one who got it done.
Some are well off while others are working for theirs. The lead never took charge. While the up and comer was determined but didn't like stepping on toes but hated walking egg shells.

Trying to be normal so many things complicated
Wanting a family coming from a broken home
Working hard to stand out stuck in the background
Showing up with good vibes positive energy
Helping the team trying to keep them motivated
Be in a healthy relationship get to know the person
Not lust and be manipulated
By someone who's insecure causing doubt
Who doesn't care about the real you
Staying positive feeling depressed
Working hard to get in shape
Done it before dieting to get it back
Know what it takes even with health conditions

Never one to get mad quick to forgive.
I respect others with different opinions
After being insulted it's time to cut ties
Trying to debate and conversate
Making things person doesn't mean right
Arguing with true facts  taking on lies
Staying on topic while distractions
Makin personal attacks on flaws
Nothing to do with the conversation
Always respectful not welcoming hate speech
Going silent keeping a distance
Staying away from toxic behavior
Took the insults never again
Overcome many obstacles
Don't need peoples approval
They don't have what I want
Even if they did finding another way
Not going through them to get it
Never had family support
It ends up being about them
Everyone has problems
Doesn't mean others will give up their life
Take on their drama keeps getting worse
That they choose to be stuck on
We are not the same or equal
Spoke up looked out got ignored
No sympathy or remorse emotionless
When you told the person
This could've been prevented

He was pursuing her, she gave him the run around. He had to cut ties move on. They talk about dating but she was always busy. It was one sided he'd text her and she'd never respond or left him hanging.
He knew his worth and value tired of settling because it was pointless. She got his hopes up then got his feelings hurt. Thinking this would be different it ended up being worse.
Used his time and energy pursuing his goals learning bass guitar and doing MMA getting the technique down. Working out those kinks to be a better person.

Though this was love
Turns out she's collecting
Being on her way
Trying to side hustle
Making it a job
Instead of trying work for it
Making flash promises
Pretending to be nice
After the transaction is made
The act fades away
Leaving you invested
No returns just cash taken
Leaving everyone used
A one time scam
Never buying that again

Found joy in writing got a complement reread the material. Surprised myself with my words. Always in a different mindset. Told to publish something not sure who my audience is because use to being an outcast kept out looking in.

As time passes things change along with age. From wanting to being young and dumb. Now older and wiser than before telling stories from mistakes and failures life experiences. Always deep thought coping and reflecting on life. Telling those funny stories. now being more cautious and seeking opportunities.

Stopped reviving dieing friendships. Love family but not able to be yourself makes it easy to leave things behind cut ties. One sided friendships

He wanted to be part of their world seen as an equal. They pushed him out kept him so he did his own thing. He didn't have to prove himself and stopped seeking their approval. They always talk about everyone to distract others from their wrong doing. Staying away keeping a distance
Focused on training and learning bass guitar being more artsy and creative behind the scenes making his own way being a trail blazer