Feeling empty when he didn't read his bible. Always feeling like the world is against him. Being judged while being in the rut working hard trying to be invisible get through the work week. Found peace and closure alone most point out his flaws or tell him his wrongs.
He didn't ask or bother with people they always hurt his feelings or let him down. He didn't expect much of others but started expecting more for himself.
He use to joke about being the threat because most tried to come at him he'd check them. Now he turns away knowing better than to waste his time on things and people that did not respect or value his time.  Never talking about people but they always had something to say about him. Making things personal because they had nothing on him. As the threat making them feel insecure coming at him since he didn't give them their way. Giving him crap for not doing things annoyed with him trying to assassin his character to feel empowered.
Grandpa told him you don't have to say anything when you haven't done wrong others trying to include you in the drama that's none of your business.

Home sick for a place the heart craves
That's felt in the heart deprived
But never been there desired to escape
A place where you can feel
Relax without protecting your heart
Be yourself without criticism
Feeling at the edge ready to jump
The fatal fall that changes everything
Going forward not back staying strong
Escape into the dream set free
Lost in the moment feeling whole
The world makes sense at the time
Trying to make it a reality
Dead inside the dream lives on

He felt bad for not being there but didn't like all the slander spread about his name. From the old to new he didn't like change but he was changing. Thankful and glad to to be growing. He couldn't stay the same. While others hold onto his past thinking it will be a tool to be used against him.
Not his crowd anymore not part of that life. He'd fight for them and they'd fight against him in a heart beat waiting for the moment. They'd use the numbers against him rather talk to him individually.

He was over it his words being twisted. It's not what he was saying tired of false narratives. Because he spoke up they thought they could slander his character. He had his opinion to them it was no big deal but trying to use it against him.
They insult him and expect him to be okay with that. He had an opinion now everything turns into a personal attack. He stopped acknowledging them because the disrespect was only getting worse. He was definitely over one sided arguments making him out to be the crazy one.
Not going to give up on himself or compromise his efforts just to make people happy. They'd never be happy for him so why bother.

She told him I could've had you
Too bad it never happened
When he wanted her she had a bf
He was always single living life
Feeling everything yanked around
He wanted to be complete
Searching for cope and peace
The time he was in a relationship
She kissed him on the cheek
He was confused about love
Never had her  love but wanted her
Didn't know how to feel he has someone
It was unfair he remained faithful to his current love
Even though his chance for forbidden love came back around
He tried to stay the same so much change
Everything was different never the same
Still single no children never been married
Some friends had children and married
While others got divorced the young love failed them

In silence reading a good trying to educate himself. Thought others would teach him but had to do it himself. Taking in the info trying to process apply things to life. Lots of repetition wanting it more because they told him he couldn't do it.
Said it couldn't be done but he's been doing it without excuses. The things he loved brought him hurt so he tried to find what he loved doing things for the wrong reason trying to make them right.

Watching them grow avoiding the drama always on the go. Always a private person no one needs to know or tell my business. Don't like being responsible for others since they are quick to blame than own up.
He walked away as they act like they pushed him out. Made him out to be the bad guy to justify their cruelty. Making it one sided it's always about him never what they did.
He let them run their mouth it would eventually end up in their mouth. He left and not looking back let go of those feeling he use to hoarder away.