At the end of the day he told himself to be better. Trying to live and learn from his mistakes. Tole himself never to be like that do it better be better than those who did you *****. Keep a clean head on your shoulders listen and learn.
After a while he expected too much from the wrong people. Leads are playing boss not a friend not getting personal.
Where trying to be the guy doesn't exist using use then dropping. Feeling like everything is a decoy. A set up all you want is to win but feeling like everything is a loss. All the drama all the toxic people trying to bring you down with them

Working to pay the bills over the same old routine dealing with others demands after a while he asked what would they do without him. Half the time they dump on him and treat him bad when they don't get their way. Use to being ******* over they talk about him but he's not saying anything because once they are triggered they think they have the right to take him down so they feel secure about themselves.
He just wanted to ask out the girl he had a crush on. Go on a date have fun all he did was work with bossy demanding people. He gave and didn't expect anything in return. He loved to write it made sense he could feel and be himself without judgement or hide himself because they don't care about him just expecting results. He wrote feeling free observed and analyzed his life. He made mistakes and gave up his social life to be sober because most of his friends drank it wouldn't help him get clean.
Stayed single because his relationships got complicated he wanted to balance it out have both but it wouldn't work out in his favor. His needy jealous insecure girlfriend would make him feel bad because he didn't listen or do things her way. Not able to enjoy life with friends because once his friends got in a relationship they chose that over his friendship.

Telling your feelings to a screen
Sharing your emotions
Some days it hurts really bad
Not sure how to feel
Or how to react anymore
Had an opinion now someone is mad
Spoke my mind another person is offended
Said nothing keeping the peace someone is running their mouth
They don't like the person why are they talking about them constantly.
He don't talk about anyone behind their back
He usually said it to their face telling the truth
While they lie pretending to be someone they are not
Writing to go numb be able to sleep
Those heavy burdens kept him awake
Use to being pushed out got familiar with being alone.

The weight of the world crushing his chest making it hard to breathing. Trying not to disappoint others but disappointed in himself. Trying to find balance working at two location both important to him among the they don't matter. Trying to stay loyal to the old that took care of him. The new took a risk more demanding feeling numb
Just another face in the crowd from a lead to the number 2 guy.
Feeling like a spare tire on hold waiting to be used then back into the bark trunk after the job is done

Trying to make moves feeling stuck and trapped he was a polished time he did have a chip on his shoulder. Trained by many since he was open to learn and grow. Helped out many but feeling betrayed have his all lately feeling like it's not good enough or he wasn't living up to the way he was seeing himself.
It felt like the world was against him and like he couldn't get it right something always went wrong while he was trying to do right.
Another argument with the power trip trying to stay quiet but annoyed they assume instead of asking assuming planning his evening treating him like a nobody but covering for everybody.

Trying to open up no one listens
No one cares unless it's about them
Asking about the podcast trying to put out good vibes
Haven't had a good friend for a while lost peeps over relationships and family. Didn't get it before but respect it now.
Avoiding people who drink to maintain sobriety
Got use to being alone someone is always mad or disappointed with anything done.
Excluded trying to fit in someone is always bothered by his actions or behavior.
He was one to say it to their face but they are quick to change the narrative make him out to be the bad guy. Turn everyone on him for having an opinion usually the one standing alone having a one sided argument with himself.
The double standards against him he's in the wrong but their evil doing is justified. He stares at the wall wonder what's going to happen since he questioned the things that tore him down. Now they are playing the victim telling him he overreacted because they mistreat him. Apparently it's okay but he was tired of it trying to make it through probation and transfer. He arrived so many transferred he believed in loyalty; why stay if they don't believe in you.
His first day the boss said there was better candidates only hired because of the lead and his previous summer contributions.

Be this way just trying to be himself
Act that way minding his mouth
Mostly his business kept out
Once in it wasn't anything special
He was over people so much betrayal
Who didn't follow their own advice
He anger got the best of him
No one listens but expects everything
Told he had a bad attitude
Frustrated his schedule ruined to fill-in
Last minute notice had prior commitments
Felt disrespected can't do it anymore
Tried to keep quiet being provoked
Just doing all the ***** work
Feeling robbed cheated
COVID making short staff more complicated
Trying to stay physically healthy
While mentally drained burnt out
Working towards new over the old
Usually ignored getting the 3rd degree
Lurking to cover for their own gain
So much frustration and pain from a bad leader
His way dictating work on the team
No other way expects from others
Never looking out dumping the load
Will never admit a mistake
Quick to point out the flaw