The decision sometimes you like what you're doing other times its not fun because still a student open to learn and grow. The demands are high. Playing in a band with people who have years of experience its comes natural while its constant practice behind the scenes mistakes are made and its draining. knowing your limits and whats expected of you. Trying to put on a great performance already ******* myself no critics or criticism is needed. Struggled with alcohol now dealing with someone who fell back into old habits. Not a babysitter or responsible for someone who chose be complicated. Its smothering because this person on you about your music while their life isn't bad but complicating not speaking up and complaining doesn't mean anything. As a new member glad to be playing thankful for the chance.

Crazy how they bad mouth you and the nerve to ask for a favor. You never talked bad or said anything but these smack talkers make everything personal. Before plowing through would be easy not caring about the outcome. That kamikaze mindset doesn't benefit anyone.
Walked away not playing these games. Focused on the work that needs to be done then be in the drama. The ones talking no one is talking about. Everyone knows the truth but chooses to listen to the lies. Made out to be the crazy one for having an opinion defending myself when no one else had my back.
Not wasting time on others who expect you to change or lower yourself to be liked to be accepted. Sad when they pick and choose when to like you.
Its easier to distance yourself from all the complaining and hatred they caused now manipulating other to believe they are the victims. Its easier to own up instead of pretending to be someone you're not.

The thing that bugs me about certain people. You can do them a favor and help them out not a problem but once you ask for a favor they are quick to shut it down and act live you've never had their back or looked out for them.
Being the hardest work doesn't mean I dont pay attention. It ***** to see people bad mouth a person than be fave to their face. It makes you wonder what they say about you behind your back.
Why are liars so confident in what they say. When you call them out or hold them accountable their tone changes real quick. Claiming to be on your side and quick to go against you.
Its scary to think people treat one another because they have a different view. Its okay to tell the truth I value that over lies. If people are being rather than talk about things they prefer to hold a grudge and use it to fuel their bad behavior. Understanding one another is easier said than done. Being a better person and human connection is hard when a person tries to dictate the narrative.

Learning bass is hard playing with experienced musicians that have years of playing together. It comes natural to everyone but the new player with a couple of months and still learning.
Played a live gig got the vibe. Trying to play with groove feel it find that feeling stay on tempo keep the count not get lost or make mistakes.
Being corrected I unsettling because already ******* ones self to get better and improve.

On the mats a clear mind focused on technique. It was fun till blood in the stool occurred now slowing down. Trying to find other outlets
Got ******* over by new people in charge burnt out by the toxic work environment now asking what else is out there. The community is great avoid the lazy and having fun with those that do. Stopped listening to all the talk avoiding the shady circle.
Called a rebel for doing the work not a **** up brown nose. Focused on work not doing favors anymore. A slander rep letting the talkers deal with the problem. Excluded and excited to be left alone. Only when a favor is needed the hated individuals name becomes a topic of discussion.
Writing always makes the day better till writers block causes everything to pile up. Trying to express these ideas in a health manner. Instead of letting them implode within while looping ideas clutter your mood. Easily annoyed by people that are already an inconvenience to be around. These people bad mouth you and pretend to like you to your face. They've done worse and go all out to make you look bad talking smack on everyone when no one even talks about them. Everyone knows the truth as that shady ******* lives a lie.

He woke up practiced bass for the gig
Trying to stay motivated find inspiration
Learning to play with others collaborate
Hard to trust anyone sick of the lies
Writing down ideas ready to tell the story

No longer suffering in silence
Speaking up calling out the problem
Use to bring solutions got ignored
Holding these leads accountable like I hold myself
Never an excuse things need to be done
Always moving forward taking responsibility
While leads delegates the work on others
Acting like they are doing on top of things
Only a team when all fails then help is needed
Bad communication ******* over the team
The nerve to expect a favor from the workers