india: Favorites

Apr 2013 india

Amelie

"Monday morning, oh no, not again,
Still 5 days of school until the week-end",
That's what I hear every now and then,
And I'm the only one who doesn't complain
Because I know that today, and tomorrow,
And every day of the whole week,
I'll see your face, your smile, and also
I'll hear your laugh that makes me go weak.
And my friends tell me all the time
That it's weird for me to feel attracted to you,
Because well, you're different that anyone
You're not like the others, that is true.
You don't look like the girls I dated before,
You have nothing in common with them
But on wednesdays, when I walk through the door,
I feel the love I lost coming back up again.
That's what I like about you, as you can see
I forget about my problems and my broken heart,
I just like you being close to me,
I always look for you when we're apart.
But... This feels like something forbidden,
This king of thing never happened to me,
It's scaring me and I'm like frozen.
Is this... Am I... ? No, I can't be...

I fear the day I'll have to admit it,
But being with you makes my mind jump with joy.
I think I like you, maybe a tiny bit..
My God, save me, I'm in love with a boy.

Apr 2013 india

Love Never Forgets

Apr 2013 india

Mandy Kate Fahey

Love Never Forgets

You just know,
you just feel it.
There is a click,
everything falls into place.
Everything makes sense.
Your future changes so abruptly.
You can't prepare for it.
You can't predict it.
You can't prevent it.
But suddenly,
everything has changed.
And you will never be the same.
A piece of you is gone,
you've given it to them.
To hold, to protect,
to remember.
But you are refilled with a piece of them.
To cherish, to love,
to remember.
Some day that part of you may break,
it may reject itself.
It may rip away from your body.
It will be painful, brutal,
ever so sudden.
But a little piece lingers on,
unable to escape,
trapped beneath your rib cage.
You may even forget it's there,
with time.
But one day,
you will feel a little nudge
and remember,
one who gave you a piece of their heart, once.
Time does not heal.
It's an anesthetic.
You will never forget.
Love never forgets.

Apr 2013 india

Always Hold On

Apr 2013 india

Mandy Kate Fahey

Always Hold On

Secrets seeping through my lips
Ill try to sew them shut.
Your hands are running down my legs
Ill try to keep them shut.

I'd give you my tortured heart
Place it in your hands to hold.
You always thought I was beautiful
You always held me,
Always yours to hold.

Apr 2013 india

How are we to forgive ?

Apr 2013 india

K Mae

How are we to forgive ?

Shotgun to your head.
It's over now you're dead.
We don't have to worry
Are you safe ?
How bad the pain ?
How kind of you to **** yourself
so we don't have to worry
We can get on with our lives
won't see you stumble drunk
don't have to criticize
or spout the ultimatums
Too bad you couldn't take our guilt
Our love was not enough
our patience wore right thin
there was so much to fear to lose
(we blamed it on the bitter *****)
We did not take you in
Did not save you from yourself

We have our lives to live.
You'll never leave our memory.
How are we to forgive ?

on my brother's death three years ago

Apr 2013 india

Somethin'

Apr 2013 india

Nat

Somethin'

It starts with a smile
It always starts with a smile.
I smile because I'm friendly,
and people like friendly...
Right?
Right...
People love friendly.
[Men] love friendly.
Because apparently,
Friendly equates to easy.

And so it begins.

"Hey, you seem cool,
We should hang out sometime."
Say the boys (men?) boys
In my class,
At work,
At parties.
"Okay!" I say,
Because he's cute, or funny, or smart, or possibly just
Different
From all the others.
And sometimes he is.
But sometimes...

You get to his house
To "hang out"
Because that's what people do apparently,
They "hang out"
Ask me on a date?
Laughable
I don't know that it has ever happened.
But tthey have no problem inviting me to hang.

And I go along with it.
Because we all want someone, something
And maybe this is just the way things work for my generation...
Right?

And once you get to the house
You're invited to sit on the couch.
Relax
Smoke
Have a drink
"I thought we'd watch a movie or somethin'"
...or somethin'

So the movie begins (because why get to know each other?)
And suddenly
It becomes less about the movie, and more
About the somethin'
I'm not asking for somethin'

Regardless of my nose ring,
The jokes I make,
The drinks I had,
The dresses I wear,
And the fact that I agreed to watch a movie,
"or somethin'"
I didn't come here for somethin'
I'm not asking for somethin'

"No, let's just watch the movie."

He just moves close,
Pours another drink.
When I take a sip,
His hands begin to roam.

"Seriously, no thanks."

I think about leaving but...
This is just how guys are.
Or so I've been told.

"It's no big deal. Come on. You're being a *****."

Maybe I am being ridiculous.
For some reason I feel bad. But still.
I'm not asking for somethin'

"No."

Apparently, at this point,
No
Is not an option.

"You want this too. I like you."

The fight for territory begins,
A battle I quickloy lose.
Or resign myself to?
Maybe...I asked for this?
No. I'm not asking for somethin'

Shame. Anger. I walk out alone.
How did I let this happen

AGAIN?

Guilt. Then rage.

And this time, I refuse to play the victim.
I refuse to blame myself, to keep taking this,
Because "that's just how guys are."

I didn't ask for this.
I NEVER did.

Providing drinks and entertainment doesn't mean I owe you somethin'

My dress doesn't mean I'm asking for somethin'

I am done feeling responsible,
Keeping silent,
Blaming myself.

When did men start believing that
my smile
means I'm asking for somethin'?

I'm asking for something
Not
Somethin'

Apr 2013 india

The Hollywood Grip

Apr 2013 india

Mandy Kate Fahey

The Hollywood Grip

I know you're out there,
thinking of me.
at night in your bed,
as pretty as can be.
The emotions pour out,
but the words they stay in.
In this fatal second we know,
the deadliest sin.

And these seconds tick past,
like the tears that fill your eyes.
As the liquid hits the floor,
this moment never dies.
Hollywood can't hold us back,
Hollywood can't hold us back.

The screaming begins,
as we swear never to let go.
But reality sets in,
our weakness starts to show.
And still you hold my hand,
but were starting to lose grasp.
We whisper don't lose hope,
but were going nowhere fast.

And these seconds tick past,
like the tears that fill your eyes.
as the liquid hits the floor this moment never dies.
Hollywood can't hold us back,
Hollywood can't hold us back.

And we still love so truthfully,
thinking dreaming on your bed,
your eyes as pretty as can be.
And today our bond withheld,
because Hollywood can't take you,
no Hollywood can't take you,
no Hollywood can't take you from me.

(I love you Mandy)

Note: Intellectual property belongs to Zak Laforest.
This was written for me in 2007, and I only just recovered it now.
I thought I would pay homage to it.

Apr 2013 india

cry of the siren

Apr 2013 india

thevagabondking

cry of the siren

first of the year,
not the first time
however my heart
has beat in my chest
faster than my DNA
designed

terrified
these storms control my
mind with a tempest I cannot
touch and lightning I cannot
catch

useless and helpless
a storm is a lot like love
itself

here and gone
with the wind