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JAC Jan 2018
You step into the dark
and you continue to walk
forward and it gets colder
but your footfalls follow
your feet further and further
further and further forward.
JAC Jan 2018
That is the easiest thing to break
something that is hardest to build*

you took your time with your words
since there was little time to say

what you had to, you drew out
each syllable, a razor blade

long and thin like your fingers
soon your sentence would leave

with it everything you wished for
and you will arrive with nothing.
JAC Jan 2018
I've become one of my stories,
twisting, developing, growing

as I tell myself
over and over

the life I led
became lives

the lies I fed
met reality

sincerity blur
narrative overlap

the story of the end
of the storyteller.
My writing has recently become intensely personal, and as such it has become exceedingly sparse. The stories I tell are becoming shorter and shorter, as I realize that long stories are always ongoing and can often be divided into smaller, more manageable stories. I used to be able to tell other people's stories well, because I did not know them well. Now that I am close with fewer people (and those that I am close with, I know considerably more personally), telling their stories becomes increasingly more difficult. I simply cannot do them justice. This is, alas, a note on the death of a storyteller.
JAC Jan 2018
I wish
I didn't
know why
not one of us
is okay anymore.
JAC Jan 2018
You are not going to die
they were shouting at me

I couldn't really hear them
but *you are not you will not


terror fell from their eyes
and that is what I heard

then I saw blue and black
more more and more until

you are not you will not
you will not leave me dark.
As the Gina series draws to an end, I found comfort beginning the Hospital Flowers series. Writing has been an immense help with understanding recent events, and revealing the resulting poems sequentially has given me motivation to continue doing so. Dedicated to Gina.
JAC Jan 2018
Dear man in the moon,

all I wish for
is that when it ends,
you might tell me
I fought bravely.
JAC Jan 2018
I've been to too many funerals* I say
my eyes meet yours in the window

please don't make me go to yours
is what I didn't say aloud.
Please.
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